Random Reader Rant and/or Revel

Photo by PoPville flickr user wolfpackWX

You can talk about whatever is on your mind โ€“ quality of life issues, a beautiful tree you spotted, scuttlebutt, or any random questions/thoughts you may have. But please no personal attacks and no need to correct peopleโ€™s grammar. This is a place to vent and/or celebrate things about daily life in DC.

258 Comment

  • justinbc

    Rave: Stubborn tenant in the property we were supposed to close on last Friday finally signed their TOPA agreement, and the sellers finally agreed to our renegotiated terms on closing costs. It’s amazing what threatening to walk away from a deal will do, even though it sucks getting to that point.
    Rave: Free preview screening of the new 300 movie tonight! Anyone else going?

  • Rave? Maybe just odd? Slightly creepy? Not sure if its just my ads that pop up on Popville but I really like the Westin Hotel ad with the dark haired girl holding the large umbrella; she looks like my girlfriend and it is a nice little surprise during the work day.
    Rant: Watching Hoffman films as always been a bit cathartic, but now its going to down right suck.

  • Rant: Very disturbed at the systematic and inhumane killing of stray dogs at Sochi.

    Rave: Living in the United States where we would not allow or sanction a shooting/poisoning spree of innocent dogs on our city streets (even while we struggle in factory farming).

    Rant: Sick to my stomach over these dogs being killed in such a bad way.

    • I think the mistreatment of dogs in Russia is one of the least terrible things going on over there.

    • We still systematically kill them by the millions (often in barbaric ways) in “shelters” by each year. It’s just not quite so public.

      • Yes, but my point is that the U.S. is still years ahead on this issue. You know that we wouldn’t allow a Sochi-style shoot-out of dogs in preparation for the Olympics in the U.S. Plus, I see all the good work from WHS, PetSmart Charities, and other groups I support, and I know that Americans are making an effort- even when we fall short. Looking at the bright side. The Russians, however, couldn’t even be compelled to build a shelter, and they had a year’s warning when the issue first arose. They just didn’t want to do it. Much easier to conduct a massacre, I guess.

    • the first time I traveled to a city with a lot of stray dogs, I realized that in this country, we just kill them.

      • It’s not quite as simple as that. The Humane Society and other groups have been instrumental in encouraging neutering/spaying for many years. You can’t adopt a dog or cat who has not been spayed or neutered (agreements for surgery arranged if animal is too young). That’s part of our success. And with local groups using TNR for cat populations, we’re making a dent in the problem. I don’t have numbers on me, but one group I support down in Harrisonburg, VA is bringing down their intake numbers and reducing feral populations by pursuing TNR with grant money and donations. They are just one locally-run organization. You can find these kinds of groups all over. Look, we’re never going to be perfect and to expect that is unreasonable. But we make an effort- much more than I can say for Russia, China, and a lot of other places on this earth.

      • justinbc

        Or, you know, bring them in and adopt them out.

      • Correct. When we went to Greece (Athens) there were tons of stray dogs just hanging out on the street. Most of them had collars to show that they had been spayed or neutered. None of them even bothered with people and none of the people really bothered with them. They just kind of existed on their own. Not saying Greece is super idyllic, but the killing of animals in shelters is out of control in this country- mainly due to irresponsible breeders and people who’d rather pay $2000 for that perfect doodle-poo than adopt a mutt at a shelter (which is what a “doodle” or “poo” anything is of course).

        • I absolutely hate the judgement for people who don’t get shelter dogs. Not every one of us is heartless.

          I am very allergic to most dogs. I waited on two different rescue lists, but was told that it wasn’t wise, especially as I also did not want a purebred dog, because of the health risks that are often associated with them. I researched reputable breeders who crossed two hypoallergenic dogs, and spoke at great lengths with the couple before I even met what became “my” mutt- a Yorkie-Poodle mix I paid $650 for (not thousands).

          Guess what? He is the first dog I can cuddle. The first dog that can lick me, and not have my skin break out in hives. He’s the first dog I can breathe around. Having a Yorkie-Poo has been a true joy.

          I would have much rather adopted from a shelter. It’s less expensive, for starters, and I support their work. I donate to WARL and volunteer with my local dog park committee. But please, don’t judge everyone you see with a “designer dog”– because you don’t know the full story.

          • justinbc

            Anytime you do anything different (than someone else) regarding animals it’s immediately the worst thing in the world. Welcome to Internet 101 class.

          • I am with you on that! I have severe allergies and forked out money for a hypoallergenic (non-shedding) breed. I love dogs and have always donated to shelters and animal welfare charities and will continue to.

          • Yeah, it’s also possible that the “designer dog” is a rescue! My dog is a Pomeranian/Papillon mix. He basically looks like a white Pom, but his body is a little longer and his ears are a little bigger. People tend to automatically assume he’s not a rescue and get extremely surprised when I tell them I got him from the Animal Welfare League of Arlington (people tend to ask what breed he is, where I got him from, etc. a lot, since he looks so much like a Pom, but you can tell there’s something slightly different about him). That said, I’m glad you at least looked at rescues. I’m not saying everyone has to, but I think, for most people, it’s at least worth a look to see if there is a rescue or shelter dog out there that will fit your lifestyle.

          • For anyone struggling to find low-shedding rescue dogs, I can’t recommend Mutts Matter Rescue enough. Through whatever pipeline it is that they bring in rescue and foster dogs, they seem to end up with tons of wonderful shih tzu, lhasa apso, poodle, etc. mixes, all which have hair instead of fur and are about as low-allergen as you can get. Great organization.

    • They are not just killing them because of the Olympics; they do it year round, no matter what.

  • RANT: Very bad experience at G-Books on U Street last night. The owner was very rude to me and another customer in the store for no reason. How does this guy stay in business?

  • My boyfriend chose a new apartment based almost entirely on the fact that it had a wood-burning fireplace–he didn’t even need to move, but he loved the idea of the fireplace so much that he jumped on the chance to have one. And he told the landlord that. Now the landlord says the fireplace might not be operational, and if it costs too much to fix it he won’t do it. Bah.

    • justinbc

      Funny, I’m actually thinking of converting my wood burning fireplace to a gas one. I love the smell and the crackle of the wood, but it’s a pain to deal with, doesn’t kick the heat out really, and you’ve always got some air coming in through the flue. With the gas ones they make now there are actually fans in them to pump the heat out into the whole room, and being able to do it with the flip of a switch is so much more appealing.

      • Don’t do it. I think you’ll regret choosing convenience over attractiveness. In my opinion, wood burning fireplaces have an appeal rooted in our human history that won’t go away any time soon and can’t be replaced by gas burners.

        • I disagree-my parents have a gas fireplace and we use it on a daily basis during the winter. Mostly for heat, but it adds something to the room as well. It does wonders. I cannot imagine having to buy, store, and bring wood into the house all the time. Flipping the switch is GREAT.

          • justinbc

            Yeah, my parents have one as well, that’s what gave me the idea. They had their’s built into the existing fireplace, so there was virtually no aesthetic change. I keep a massive firewood stack out back on our patio, and would definitely love to reclaim that space for something else (an extra bonus I hadn’t even thought of!).

          • Parents and sibling both converted wood burning into gas fireplaces. Instant heat, nice “logs” and no storing/hauling wood. They have no regrets.

        • + 1. Remember how you bought your house for its old world charm? A gas fireplace would kill that in my opinion.

        • Eh. I agree to a point, but if you actually want to enjoy the fireplace, put in the fireplace you’re likely to use. I had a fireplace in my last place, and it was enough of a hassle I rarely used it. Plus, when I did use it I went into work the next day smelling like I’d come from the Maine woods. I love the Maine woods, but it’s not really the greatest aroma to bring to an office every day.

          • A gas fireplace is just a dolled-up space heater.

          • Yeah, but a space heater you use >> a drafty wood fireplace you don’t.

          • I feel like gas fireplaces are the wall to wall carpeting of our generation. Everyone back in the day gave hardwood floors the finger and covered it up with wall to wall carpeting. Now with our generation, no one would have their home caught dead with it. I feel in like 10 years, same will be said of gas fireplaces.

      • I think it’s completely fine to convert to gas as long as you keep the original fireplace mantle/hearth in tact. I really really wish of anything that the idiots who redid my house would have kept the original mantle. I’ve been searching ever since for one that is period-appropriate and not way too huge for the living room.

      • Years and years ago, my parents installed a wood-burning fireplace that also has a fan that cuts on when the temperature rises to a certain point. The blown air heats the entire living room, dining room and kitchen. It’s still going strong and helps keep the gas bill low. I’m sure you could find one yourself if you went looking.

        • My parents heated their farmhouse with two woodstoves (one in kitchen, one in living room) for 25 years. They had radiant heat panels in the ceilings as supplemental heat (but never used them). The woodstoves put out great heat but it was work to haul wood, keep the fires going, clean ashes. Which is why the stoves were converted to gas – it was time.

    • That’s crazy that he didn’t ask before signing the lease. Most wood-burning fireplaces in rentals are either not operational or it’s questionable whether they can be used. When I put my apartment up for rent I’ll be disclosing that on the Craigslist ad to not give anyone the wrong idea.

    • If your boyfriend chose to move because he wanted a wood burning fireplace, does he want one enough to take on the cost of fixing it — if the landlord agrees?

  • Revel: I posted last week about possibly having bed bugs. After having a bed bug inspector come in, hooray no bed bugs!
    Rant: Still getting bit almost daily on exposed skin, especially my arms, during waking hours. I find I’m getting bit when I’m in my living room. They start are raised welts, almost like mosquito bites, and then for the next day or so they itch like crazy and the welt is replaced with an expanding red ring. A day or so after that, there’s just some faint redness and a raised, red bump the size of a pin prick. I never see whatever is biting me, which makes me think it’s not a spider and we’ve ruled out bed bugs. The only thing my online research has turned up is that it might be some sort of mite, like rat mites or house mouse mites. I live in a large building, so the presence of rodents (and their associated mites) wouldn’t surprise me, but I have no clue how to get rid of them. Has anyone else experienced anything like this?
    Additional Rant: I’m supposed to have people over this weekend. I’d feel AWFUL and awfully embarrassed if they end up getting bit. Hopefully a thorough vacuum and the non-toxic spray I found on Amazon will fend off these little buggers for a night. :-/

    • justinbc

      Throw down some plastic on the couch old school granny style?

    • You might want to think about a visit to a dermatologist.

    • Do you or any of your neighbors in close proximity to your apartment have pets?

      • I have cats, but I’ve checked them for fleas, given them baths, and used the monthly stuff on them. They’re also not scratching, which leads me to think they’re not being bit. I went to the doctor when I first got the bites because I thought they were just a rash. She was the one that pointed out that they’re actually bug bites. I hadn’t noticed the tiny bite mark until she pointed it out. This is just so frustrating.

    • houseintherear

      Not to be too gross, but I get those types of bumps a few times a year. They get raised, then pop and there’s a bit of liquid, then they disappear. Very itchy. For me, it’s a form of a rash from something I touched or whatever else, but it does not look like a typical rash because there are only a few and they’re not grouped in one place. Anyway, worth chatting with your doc or maybe trying a benedryl..? Good luck!

    • I don’t know if this is helpful or if it will freak you out more. I once subletted my place for a summer, and on 4th of July weekend, I got all these panicked calls from my very distraught subletter saying I had bed bugs. I was baffled since I’d never had bites or noticed signs of bed bugs. As it turns out, a squirrel had gotten into the walls somehow and that had led to chiggers. Since I was not actually present for this, I don’t have first hand knowledge of what the bites look like. Still, thought I’d mention it. I hope you get to the bottom of it soon!

    • I had that happen to me last year! A random bite that had to happen at home, and then it’d swell up really large. Mine (I had three over a few weeks) would actually get quite big and hot to the touch, like they were infected. I ended up concluding that it was the pillows on my couch. I don’t know if they were infested with something, or if I just somehow developed an allergy to them. I got rid of them and haven’t had a bit since. It’s very, very unnerving.

    • Kind of sounds like Shingles.

    • Dust mites.

  • Rant: I have been going on dates with a girl from an online site for about 2 months now, maybe 10 dates total (including staying over a few times). Anyways she is very sweet and has a fun personality…but i just dont see things progessing (i.e how many times can we go out for dinner before that gets boring?) she also lives in arlington and works in retail (so weekends are tricky and has to work early during the week). I feel like it is time to end things and unfourtunately its at the point where it must be done in person. I’ve never really had to do this and i am kind of just dreading it, but i think it is best for me to move on and see what else is out there.
    Rave: Changing things up to hopefully get me out of this mid winter funk.

    • justinbc

      If it’s that mediocre feeling for you then perhaps she feels the same way and just can’t bring herself to express it either. I feel like if there are no sparks initially then they’re much less likely to come later too.

      • yeah i definitely feel the ‘mediocrity’, I am not sure if she feels the same. I guess thats part of the issue we never really connected on an emotional level. I think that might be part of the problem for me and online dating, part of the mystery and fun of finding a partner is lost and its pretty much assumed that you want to hook up with the other person right away. Anyways thanks for the advice justin.

        • Maybe she enjoys just dinner, or maybe she’s ready to try some other activities as well. have you thought about that? Maybe (if you are interested in seeing if it could actually progress) suggest that for your next date, you all do something a bit less “boring”. I say this because I was in a similar situation. I was getting a bit bored with the typical dates and thought things wouldn’t progress, then I suggested a new (to us) activity and got to know that person a bit better. Not saying this would be the case for you, but worth a shot.

          Also, kudos to you for having the balls to do it face to face. Nothing worse than the random “fade-away” when you think things are actually going pretty well.

          • @Ash. She really liked to go thrift store shopping so i suggested we do that on sunday. While it was ‘fun’ and ‘different’ neither of us ended up getting anything other than U&Pizza at the end. So i was kind of dissapointed, i was kind of expecting her to drive me around and show me a lot of cool places but it was just one or two spots in my neighborhood. I feel like at this point it is just dead in the water.

          • Take her bowling. Or go-kart racing.

          • So, she didn’t entertain you enough? Did you tell her you wanted to check out more places or ask for advice for other places to go? If the fact that neither of you found something while thrifting plays into your feelings about the date then you’re an idiot. I love thrifting, but it’s a thrift store, they have what people donate.
            I kind of want you to break up with her, if only to spare this poor girl from being your full time entertainer and providing you with your exact idea of how dates (and eventually your relationship?) should go.

    • Just try to include what you did like about her initially. You can’t help how you feel but it will soften the blow a little. It’s wonderful that you aren’t willing to just drop off the face of the earth.

      What are you looking for generally?

      • @Andie. Theres definitely a lot to like about this girl i just dont think we connected on an emotional or physical level at this point to continue ‘pretending’ like we did. I agree that i want to ‘man up’ and be honest and straight forward in my relationships so falling off the face of the earth is not the right thing to do. I guess generally i just want a girl who can open me up to new experiences and introduce me to new people and ideas. Ideally the girl would live around me thus making plans a lot simplier instead of ‘a big deal’ (the girl i was seeing lived in arlington, i live in columbia heights). What do you generally look for in a guy or girl?

        • justinbc

          If you’re going to continue using online dating then I would suggest filtering out anyone not in DC, since that seems to be one of the major hindrances for you (believe me, you’re not alone in that mindset). There are so many people living in DC now that it probably won’t affect your potential user base that much, and you can potentially avoid that in the future. I know OKC has geographic settings that allow it, not sure about other sites.

        • What do I look for or what should I be looking for? I’m literally writing a book about my dating disasters in the last couple years…so I think I’m still working out the answer to that question. I guess so far what’s become apparent is that I want a guy that is straightforward and honest, and appreciates my honesty. The rest is still left in question.
          Want to touch base off of here and see if getting a drink would be fun? Popville…can you facilitate ๐Ÿ™‚

          • justinbc

            “Popvilleโ€ฆcan you facilitate”
            What, you mean pick the place or something? If so, I vote The Passenger, that was always a great gauge for me in determining whether or not I would like someone.

          • I actually meant that I could email Dan and give him my contact information. Although your concept could be fun too!

          • For anonymous who might break up with his girlfriend because he wants to do more than go out to dinner, but can’t come up with anything? I’d stick with OKC.

          • LOL @ jeslett. YES this is what I was thinking too!!

          • @Andie, are you talking about between me and you or you and justin? I would be happy to meet…i probably have a lot of interesting dating ‘mini disasters’ that might give you a good (guys) perspective.

          • justinbc

            Oh, definitely you man. I am not on the market ๐Ÿ˜‰

          • Maybe you could swap info and give your exes in Arlington each other’s contact info, too.

          • @Anonymous I was talking about you. (I THINK Justin is married but I could be wrong about that!)

            You guys are harsh! Dating in this city can be tough. This guy a) wants to make sure there’s a certain chemistry/attraction (instead of just being complacent) and b) is up for fun activities. He’s also got enough decency to realize that the conversation is going to be tough but he has to do it anway, and turned here for advice.

          • @Andie give dan your contact info and i can email him…i really should make an account so people known who I am :).

            Do i just email dan and tell him you wanted to give me your contact information?

            Also thanks for the advice everyone…its definitely a touchy subject and no right or wrong answers!

          • Anonynon

            Blithe – I have said all these things. I am obviously not going to pressure her to invite me to her place if she doesnt want to but it doesnt even seem on the table. Her friends were suppose to come to my new years party and then the magically disapeared when she showed up…i thought it was odd but maybe something did come up in the end. I am also not saying i am above going to a nice dinner every once in a while but if thats the extent of the relationship is trying new restraunts, i can do that with my friends….. I also was the one who put out on the table that i wasnt seeing anyone else and she has not once even questioned what we are or what we are doing. I dont know what she wants and she doesnt know what i want, basically its two blind people dating. with my last girl friend we did not even go out very often (she prefered a 6 pack and take out) and that was fine! My issue is that she hasnt opened me up into her world like i have to her, and i dont think she has the drive to push me to be a better version of my current self.

          • Thanks for providing more detail. From your previous post about the thrift store date it sounded like you didn’t put in effort and she tried, but it wasn’t enough. This makes it more clear that you have been open and she hasn’t really reciprocated (as much as any one side of a story can make anything more clear). And I came so close to taking back my previous knock, but then I read your last sentence.
            You should want to the best version of you with her. Yes, that takes input from her, but it’s not all on her. If my boyfriend ever said I didn’t have enough drive in our relationship to make him a better person I would smack him upside the head. Relationships are work, but I get enough demands about drive at work. Maybe you need to look for a more Type A person.

          • Corey — these are kind of out of order, but I’m responding to your 2:30 post. If you don’t know what she wants, and she doesn’t know what you want, I think that y’all should, you know, like TALK about it. And if you need to be the one to initiate the conversation because it will help you to find out if it’s worth it to you to move forward in this relationship, so be it. If it’s not worth it to you to find out, then bail like a gentleman. “It’s not You, it’s ME.” Is trite, but useful.
            I think that if you want someone with the drive to push you to be your better self, you need to talk about that as well. Many of us are used to getting yelled at for that — by people who want us to appreciate them just as they are, warts and all, at least during the first few months/years of the relationships. In any case, my very opinionated advice to you is still the same: talk about what your expectations are. See if she can talk openly and honestly about her expectations, as well as how she feels about yours. If y’all can’t manage this type of conversation, for whatever reason, then decide if this inability to move forward is enough for you to warrant ending the relationship.

        • The guys that I’ve gotten deeply involved with, who have my heart and my trust, have been the ones that I enjoy doing “nothing” with. They’re men that I feel “at home” with, and whatever we do feels special because it’s us doing it together. I’ve had great times washing the car — which turned into a water fight lol; going for a walk; staying up late at night talking; cooking together — it’s good because it’s us. My reasoning is that I can have fun with pretty much anyone if we’re doing a planned activity that we both enjoy. But someone that I can just hang out with because I love the conversations…. is a keeper.

        • It sounds like you want your date to do a lot of the work — both emotionally and practically. I wonder if you’ve bothered to tell her this. For all you know, she might be making an effort to be cooperative and to go along with whatever she thinks you might like. I’m not urging you to pursue this, but if you do decide to, you might want to be more open about what you are looking for — which enhances the chance that you’ll get it. This is particularly true if you’re going to do on-line dating — where you really do have the chance to be very specific about what you want before you meet face to face.

          As others have said, I commend your willingness to break up in person. It speaks well of you — but you also might learn something. Having the “break-up talk” can be a way of saying what you want, what you expected, and it gives your date an opportunity to do so as well. Sometimes this means that you’re on totally different pages. Sometimes this can be a way of having essential communication — that leads to growth and change. In any case, it’s the kinder, more mature way of handling it.

          • Anonynon

            ^ @blithe i think you and others have the wrong idea. I have been the one putting in the work and coming up with the majority of the dates (and i have picked great places) i have also invited her to my new years eve party (which was pretty awesome and introduced her to all my friends), she on the other hand has never invited me to stay over/meet her friends (she is in the process of moving currently but even in the weeks before the move there was nothing). I feel like its weird i havent met any of her friends yet, which makes me suspicious. In terms of being emotionally open – the first time she stayed over i told her that i stopped seeing other people since our first date. I was open and honest, but it seems like that has faded away and it did not continue (there has been no talk about what is ‘going on’ since then).

          • Corey — I didn’t mean to suggest that you haven’t been making an effort. Far from it! From your post, though, I do wonder about how / whether the two of you are communicating your needs and expectations re: your relationship. Wanting someone to share new experiences, people, and ideas with is great. But I had this awful image of the two of you sitting around in a nice restaurant, with you wondering just WHEN she was going to start introducing you to new people and ideas, while she’s possibly clueless about your expectations, because you haven’t explicitly discussed them with her.
            I’m not intending this as a criticism either, just wondering if you’ve said things like “I’d really like to meet your friends”, and suggested a specific way to do this’ or “I’d love it if you planned our next date — let’s do whatever your idea of the perfect date is, surprise me”! vs hoping she’d “magically “get it” and start introducing you to new ideas and including you into her life in a wider way.

    • I am dealing with the exact same situation except it is a boy who lives in Arlington. I have been putting it off for a week. I guess we just both need to bite the bullet and have the awkward conversation. However, I was thinking a text would be fine in this situation.

      • Nooooooooooo texxxxxxxxxt noooooooooooooooooooo! If the relationship is to a point that officially “breaking up” is necessary, then it’s by definition to the point that a text is not sufficient. In fact, a text is never sufficient. At the very least do it over the phone. Yeah, it’s awkward, but so are lots of things.

        • justinbc

          What’s the cutoff point for when a text is or is not acceptable? I’m pretty sure I’ve never used that method, but now I’m hoping I didn’t at some point! I mean, 2 dates, and you didn’t really mesh, texting back to say you’re not interested isn’t really rude, right?

        • You know, I agree on some level. However, we have actually never spoken on the phone, so why start now? If we had gotten to the level of “this is my boyfriend” then I understand, but after only two-three months?

          • If you’ve spent the night together, he/she deserves more than a text.

          • I don’t see why never having spoken on the phone limits your ability to do so now; the point isn’t that it’s your usual method of communication, the point is that it’s the second best thing to going down there in person.

          • justinbc

            Uggghh, I hate talking on the phone. I would actually rather do it in person! ๐Ÿ™‚

          • Two to three months of dating? That is a long enough time to require an in-person or at least phone conversation. If you had said two to three weeks I might cut you more slack.
            I also hate talking on the phone. Would totally rather do it in person.

          • Ah, but the good thing about the phone, is the other person can’t see that I have a script, or at least bullet points, written out in front of me on my desk. (*Cough* Lawyer habits *cough*.) On the other hand, if you show up with a written script to break up in person maybe they’ll just think they dodged a bullet… ๐Ÿ˜‰

          • “Only 2-3 months”? Wow. Are we talking 2-3 months of some pretty solid hang out/date time, or are we talking more we met 2-3 months ago, but for whatever reason, we’ve only actually hung out 3-5 times? Because if it’s the former, I’d definitely say a text is not the way to end it, but if the latter, I think it’d be acceptable (at least I wouldn’t have a problem with it).

          • To clarify it was 2-3 months, but you have to factor in there were a few holidays and weeks that we wouldn’t see each other. We also were not/are not talking everyday. Probably in total there were only about 6 dates and it was never a defined exclusive thing, but it has gotten to the point it would be rude to not end it. I am also not saying I can’t talk on the phone, but I just don’t know if it would be completely required. Is it? I am getting the sense that popville thinks it is.

          • Yes, I do think it would be rude to end it via text after 6 dates.

      • I love how dating someone living in Arlington = death for a relationship, at least for a DC resident. I can totally relate to that, as my first place was in Ballston when I moved here nearly 6 years ago. My partner (DC-bound) threatened to break it off if I didn’t move into DC at the end of my 3-month lease. I resisted for the sake of being contrarian, but ultimately think it was one of the best decisions I made (don’t tell him that though). ๐Ÿ™‚

        • You are so right. I have heard that said so many times. When you don’t have a car, dating someone in Arlington from DC is basically a long distance relationship, haha.

    • I got married before on-dating took off (yep, that old folks) and feel lucky I did. I know people find their soulmates this way and I am happy for them, but it seems that it would be difficult to move organically into a deeper relationship when you are both yourself and your “dating profile”.

      • Online dating sucks. Period.

        • justinbc

          It’s certainly worse for women than it is for men, by nearly every account I’ve heard.

          • I really liked dating on OKC. I’ve been dating my bf I met there for just about 2.5 years and before that I dated a number of other guys, one for 5 months, the rest for less. The barrage of emails from obnoxious dudes is terrible, though. Men shouldn’t be turned off by women who have red email lights, most have just learned it’s better to ignore the idiots than engage them.
            But the dating itself was great. I never went on a bad date. Sure, I went on a few uninteresting dates, but nothing bad. I did get the fade from a guy who I went on like 8 dates with and was really past the point of the fade or even a text break up.
            I also don’t think the mystery is gone just because you saw the person’s profile. You get some background info that way, the same way you would if a friend introduced you, but the background info isn’t the person. Meeting them with a little background info still leaves light years of mystery and potential for compatibility.

          • agreed. I’ve heard horror stories for girls. For me, a good looking guy with a solid job and plenty of friends…i usually make the most of it, sometimes ends with nothing, sometimes we hook up, sometimes a second date but usually never a disaster.

          • Nope, I’m a dude. It still sucks.

          • justinbc

            I loved OKC as well. After being in two relationships for all of my twenties and never really “dating” it was like hitting a gold mine of fun new adventures. Even though I didn’t meet my current partner there, she was on it at the same time, and seeing her profile definitely encouraged me to make a move or miss out.
            I never really had any bad dates (although I did have lots of unusual propositions), but there was one that was exceptionally off-putting at the end. The date itself was going great, and by the time we had made it to spot #2 (mind you, I always pay on a first date) the girl said she had to go meet her friend, who I would be perfect for, because she had decided she wasn’t really into me. I had no other plans, so I figured why not. We get to that spot, and I actually like the friend better, but towards the end of the night she says (they were both hammered at this point) to the original girl “was that your husband who called?”, to which I instantly perk up and ask wtf? Apparently the first girl was the screener for the second girl, who was too awkward to go on first dates. I politely said no thank you to that situation and likely saved myself a good bit of crazy.

          • @justinbc Wow. I’ve heard of wing-women, but that takes it to a whole other level! (A ridiculous level). The majority of my married or long-term partnered friends have actually met their partners online, and most of them found that it was worth it in the end, but there were points where it was frustrating and draining, because it’s a volume game, and they had to sift through a LOT of creepy first-contacts, so-so online chats, first-dates, and several-week bouts of dating that never made it off the ground into a full-fledged relationship. But it really did expand the pool of potential dates, especially for people like us–we’re a relatively tight-knit and small group of friends, aren’t hugely introverted or into the bar pick-up scene, and most of us work in an industry that’s majority-female, which limited some of the other channels for meeting men in-person (like co-workers, fix-ups with friends of friends, etc.)

          • justinbc

            If you want a really interesting read, check out the piece on the math wiz who created OKC bots to fish out the perfect match for him. I would link to it, but it would probably get moderated out.

          • It’s a mixed bag for sure. I did online dating for about a year and a half, all told, and while I don’t have any horror stories about the actual dates I went on, the sometimes awful messages could be quite draining. On the other hand, I met my now-boyfriend on OKC and he’s wonderful. It did take a lot of time and energy though and got quite frustrating at times.

        • Yes, it sucks. And not to call out the original poster of this particular topic, but it’s sucked for me because I’ve had experiences with a lot of guys that sounds just like him – want the female to do all the work and magically entertain him and take him on all these fantastic journeys and new experiences and new people….while he would basically do nothing and just expect this magical perfect relationship to just appear.

          I think someone hit on this earlier, but with online dating, assuming you spend time perusing someone’s profile and getting to know them online, there’s almost an expectation that when you do meet in person, sparks will fly and everything will be perfect and you’ll have this awesome relationship, just like in the movies! No one actually wants to take time to get to know someone/grow with a person. But that’s another topic for a different day.

          • Your second point is a lot of why I like to meet someone in person pretty quickly after we start chatting online. I feel like, in the past (and for many friends), too much e-mail/text communication before actually meeting in person can mean that each party has built up the other in his/her mind so much that it inevitably winds up being disappointing.

          • I’m the anon who said online dating sucks and is a dude. I actually feel the pressure is all on me to come up with the interesting things to do, as the guy in the “relationship.” I’m kind of in a reverse situation of the OP. I’ve been a few dates with a girl and have been kinda bashing my brains to come up with cool and interesting things to do, which quite frankly, is not hard to do in this town, and I’m not getting any excitement from or about her. So I’m in a pickle as it’s still early in the relationship… continue on out of nothing else on my horizon and be ok with boring, or end it now because I don’t see/feel excitement in this pairing?
            That said, I am realistic about online dating. I’m not expecting sparks or fireworks in that first date. It would be awesome but I’m not expecting it because that’s not the nature of online dating. That’s why I’ve given it a go (for the record, I’m 3 dates in and she would like to continue) but I’m really not feeling an equal footing here.
            So, OP, maybe you should cowboy up, holster up your guns, and come up with something “exciting” yourself before calling it quits.

          • justinbc

            @KMB, agreed. I didn’t even bother with the “chatting” part when I was on OKC. I would send one message with a bit of info that showed I actually read through her profile and found common interests, and if she read mine, replied, and was interested we would go out. The back and forth is what the actual date itself should be for, save the text for message boards!
            @Anonymous, I honestly don’t think any particular experience is going to make someone more or less interesting to you (or the OP frankly). People are who they are, generally. Whether they’re shooting a gun at a range or eating pancakes isn’t going to change much of that. Forcing relationships that you’re already bored in is a bad idea. It just leads to being 3 months in like the poster above and wondering whether you have to break it up via text, email, or phone call.

    • I think a few people are being a little harsh here. It seems like it’s just not working for you, even though it’s difficult to 100% articulate why. Good for you for recognizing that and deciding to do something about it (and making that something talking to her in person)! I’m not sure how old you are, but as I’ve gotten older (I turn 31 this month), I try not to date anyone long term unless I see it going somewhere. I feel like you gave it enough time and you are being so much more mature about it than a lot of people in this town (and in the world).

      • Anonynon

        Thanks – btw this is the person who originally posted the comment. I logged into my account. @anonymous just above KMB’s post. I totally sympathize with you, there IS a lot of pressure for the guy to come up with dates, location, ect. I am an ENSJ and i really cant deal with indifference. I need a woman who can be decisive and make decisions on her own.
        @KMB – thanks! At this point i have had the long term, the shorter term (6 months) and then a handful of one of dates and also hooking up with girls in my social circle (bad idea but its not the end of the world). I think you hit the nail on the head – i just dont see it going anywhere and i could rationalize it in any number of ways to make myself feel better but, what is the point in that?

    • saf

      “how many times can we go out for dinner before that gets boring”

      I dunno. Depends on the person. I’ve been having dinner with a few folks for 30+ years who still don’t bore me. There are other who bore me the first time.

  • Rave: Son moved out. Now, if I can only get the cat to move out, maybe the girlfriend will stay at my place more often.
    Rant: Low-level empty nest syndrome (even though he’s still in town). It’s not just for stay at home moms any more!
    Rave: Did well on first 2k erg test of the new season, beating my best time from last year and finishing ahead of 3 of 4 rowers representing arch-rival club at The Sprints.

  • Rant: Having one of those flashes of anxiety/trepidation about finances. The partner and I had a long conversation about long term goals, and sometimes it all just seems so impossible and overwhelming.
    Rave: Having these conversations with my partner.
    Rave: We make good money (definitely more than my parents ever imagined); we have good jobs; we can pay our bills (something that didn’t happen every month when I first started working).
    Rave: No rain today!

    • I used to really stress over finances but I have been trying to be more at peace. I’m not missing bills, my savings are headed in the right direction, I am making smart choices for the long term, preparing in case of an emergency, and certainly never have to worry about my next meal or even my next round of bills. This is a huge blessing…especially after reading some of the stories about how cuts in assistance programs impact some residents so harshly. It sounds like you are also fairly blessed…try to see the positive instead of stressing about huge financial goals. Good luck!

    • You’re so right. We’ve had some major expenses come up recently (renovation gone wrong not being the least of it) and I’ve been freaking out over all the money we’ve had to pour out. We had a really really good savings account, and now, not so much. However, we still can pay our bills on time and have some left over to do fun things, and still have some emergency money in case something else goes wrong. It is all about perspective and it’s definitely good to get a reminder once in a while!

  • Rant – Just noticed a huge stain on my skirt. I blame the poor lighting in my bedroom for not seeing it this morning. I have an after work function tonight that I have to go to in my stained clothing. Ugh. I really need to start laying out my clothes the night before. Or get rich and buy a house with a huge, well lighted walk in closet/dressing room combo.
    Rave – This is a shallow rave, but I bought a nice new purse over the weekend and I’m really loving it!

  • Rant: Stupid Nieghbor. Watermain broke in street over the week. Crews were out there yesterday working on it when I got home. There was no running water, and heard one of the nieghbors arguing the with work crew about not being notified of the outage etc. She was cursing and kept saying if this happened in such and such neighborhood, they would have been notified etc..
    Rave: Water was back on in time to cook dinner.
    Rave: All the windows were installed yesterday on the soon to be new home.

    • Ha, something about water makes people crazy. During the polar vortex our neighbor stopped by to say his pipes were frozen and he thought it was our fault because for some reason he thought we were running the hose outside. Even though we shut off our bibs and valves a month prior?

  • Rant: apartment hunting. It’s like a bloodsport out there! Any better options than craigslist?
    Related rant: I’m too old to live in an apartment that caters to 20 something staffers with party rooms and amenities that I will never use.
    Rave: at least I have a well paying job and hopefully can afford a decent place. Just have to find one!

    • justinbc

      I used Padmapper back when I was hunting. It still pulls data from CL, but at least it’s more efficient with filters.

    • I preferred Lovely, since you can star favorites on a map, but I’ve also heard people have success with Urban Igloo. Also, try looking on Craigslist for some building managers, then go to their websites to see what other properties are available. Lots of places in DC are *not* for 20-something staffers with those kind of amenities, particularly older buildings…and the charm is a plus!

      • I second Urban Igloo! After banging my head against the wall with Craigslist, I scoped out Urban Igloo’s website…then emailed for more info…and within a few days I’d lined up an in-person meeting with a realtor! We saw a total of 6-7 rentals over the course of two days and we found our place on Day #2! That’s it! No fees, no hassle, no paperwork beyond the standard rental applications with the apartment leasing office.

        • Forgot to mention that Urban Igloo has a few offices around town – the one we went to is on Eye Street so it’s easy to get there via metro or bus.

          You can do a faceted property search on their website, too – limit it by metro line, pets allowed, utilities included, etc. Very handy!

    • Are you seeking to live in a particular neighborhood/part of the city? If so, I’d just go to that neighborhood and see what the options are (large buildings, small buildings, row houses, etc.). If you’re looking to live in a building see who it’s managed by and check their website (sorry if this sounds incredibly obvious). I say that because I actually got lucky and found my current apartment on Craigslist, but the management company actually has a lot of buildings in NW and if I knew that, I could have just as easily bypassed Clist and searched their website.

    • It’s crazy but I looked on hotpads.com and took the first place I found that I liked in Adams Morgan. Love it and the rent is below market! Craigslist is a hassle so I would try hotpads. I dont work for them just like the interface and had great luck with it!

    • I’ve had great experience with WC Smith. Check out their website.

      • That’s actually who I was referring to in my post (wasn’t sure if namedropping was cool on this site or not) and I love them and would recommend living in one of their properties.

        • thanks! i’d love to hear about management companies you’ve had good luck with. I’m currently renting from a single landlord (i.e., just a random guy who is renting out his condo) and like it a lot better than dealing with an impersonal management company who doesn’t care about their tenants at all. Renting from an individual has been great, because he cares about the apartment.

          • Well, I’ve only been living in a WC Smith building since November, but I’ve had nothing but wonderful experiences. The management staff is nice, friendly, and responsive, which I used to take for granted, but after hearing about some of the horror stories my friends have had to deal with, I realize how lucky I am.

          • I can highly recommend Keener Management. I’ve lived in one of their buildings for 5 years now. I actually moved out and then moved back in after a terrible experience with an individual landlord. My building has a full-time onsite manager, who is very responsive, as well as a full-time maintenance worker.

          • I’ve lived in a Bernstein building for two years and they’ve been great. (I think there is also a real estate company called Tilton Bernstein, but seems to be a different company; I’m talking about Bernstein Management). My building is older, so it does not have the shiny amenities of the newer, “luxury” buildings, but like you, I wasn’t really going for those, and I would rather live in an older building with some character and save a little money vs. brand-new fancy buildings (not that I can afford those, anyway). Bonus, the older buildings are under DC rent control. I can’t speak for Bernstein’s other buildings, but they’ve always been responsive to maintenance requests. Usually if I tell the person in the leasing office about a maintenance problem as I’m leaving for work, someone’s been in my apartment and fixed it the same day, by the time I get home. And they have an emergency number for after-hours maintenance; the one time I had to use it, they sent someone within 1-2 hrs to fix the issue. And again, don’t know about their other buildings, but while mine appears to have a fair amount of 20s/early 30s residents, it’s not a party atmosphere at all. VERY occasionally I’ll hear someone having a small party in their apartment. And occasionally I’ll hear noise in the hallways late at night, but I think that’s mostly just groups of friends coming in from a night out and not being obnoxiously intentionally loud, but just not realizing how much their voices carry in a quiet hallway.

          • I rent from Novo Properties, which manages buildings on the Hill and in Brookland (and maybe other places,too). Their leasing agent was hard to get ahold of and their website is a bit out of date, but everyone I’ve worked with since then has been great! Super responsive, maintenace folks are friendly, etc.

            On the other hand, I have not heard anything good about Evolve DC.

          • Also in a WC Smith building, they are really responsive and great. Building isn’t fancy, but it is well-maintained and the rent is reasonable.

  • Have a couple coming to visit this weekend and so far their only request is to go to Ben’s chili bowl. Any suggestions for other things to fill Saturday with? I’m sort of a at loss with this weather and am thinking this couple won’t really be into a traditional museum.

  • Rave: Looking glass trivia tonight
    Rant: Never knowing any of the answers. Oh well, good friends!

  • Rant: of all the apartments in the Clarendon/Ballston area this idea at work wants to move into my buidling. I usually dont call people dumb or idiots lightly but this person is certifiably dumb. Not to mention creepy as shit and a back stabber. I dont need you in my business and telling my boss shit. NOT pleased at all. ๐Ÿ™

  • Rave: Took three pregnancy tests and all positive! We were not really trying to get pregnant, but also not trying to stop it either
    Rant: Because we were not really planning this, I had a few drinks before my first missed period and now I am super nervous
    Double Rant: Trying to find an OBGYN that is accepting patients is a nightmare. Any recommendations would be much appreciated.

    • Don’t worry about the drinks. They will have zero effect on your kid.

    • justinbc

      I think the “few drinks before I realized” thing is pretty common. As long as a few really means a few, and not an all-night rager!

      • Can you ever NOT offer your opinion? Even on obstetrical matters??

        OP, even an all-night rager (or a dozen all-night ragers plus heroin) would have no effect. The embryo doesn’t begin to share nutrients with the mother for a good while.

        • hehe, poster’s got a point!

        • justinbc

          There are multiple times where I have not. You could have answered your own question by looking at this very RRR&R. And, it seems like my “opinion” is the overwhelming majority.

          • Actually, no. What you offered was no reassurance (which is what’s warranted here), but rather an excuse for the poor pregnant lady to beat herself up. “As long as it’s not an all-night rager.” What if it had been? Then what? What background do you have for saying that it would be a problem if she HAD gotten black-out drunk post-conception? And what gives you, a vocal NON-parent, the right to worry a soon-to-be-parent over the workings of HER body??
            THINK, man, before you type. For the love of…

          • justinbc

            Because as a human being, my concern is also for the soon-to-be parent. If she does get blackout drunk then she has no idea what she’s potentially done to her own body. Remember, there are 2 people there, not just the almost baby.

          • Ohmygodjuststopalready. You stated a purported medical fact without any training or basis to do so and people are rightfully calling you out on it. Please tell us this is just some obnoxious online persona, and that you really aren’t this way in real life. If you are, then you are a pompous, self-important fool.

          • justinbc

            Which medical facts did I state again? And look at the post below mine, it states the exact same thing.

          • “And look at the post below mine, it states the exact same thing.” Sure, and you look at the many others that say the exact opposite (and include the underlying reason). Stick to online dating advice, you’re out of your depth here.

          • You type a lot for someone who apparently can’t read: “As long as a few really means a few, and not an all-night rager!”
            That’s a statement of purported fact (actually, it’s a sentence fragment, but let’s not get hung up on sentence diagramming) alleging that having a few drinks in the very early stages of pregnancy isn’t a problem, while having some unspecified amount that you term a “rager” is. And you have no training or basis to offer that advice, do you?

          • justinbc

            @Anon, no, that’s not at all what I stated. I said that it’s common for someone to have a few drinks before realizing they’re pregnant, as long as by a “few” she didn’t mean an all-night rager. I know lots of women that this has happened to (the few drinks), but none personally that have binged before. It’s a statement from my own personal experience of knowing people with children, the same as anyone else here. I gave zero medical information whatsoever.

          • “I gave zero medical information whatsoever.” Unlike the several others here who are confirming that you’re full of $h!t.

          • justinbc

            Stavros, I’m full of shit in stating that it’s common for women to do this? Or are you saying that it’s more common for women to binge drink beforehand? Set aside your personal dislike for me, someone you’ve never met, and actually read what I wrote.

          • That post-hoc justification doesn’t make any sense when you take into account your condescending, faux-concerned statement above that “If she does get blackout drunk then she has no idea what sheโ€™s potentially done to her own body. Remember, there are 2 people there, not just the almost baby.” You were offering a medical judgment that it was OK to have a few drinks, not OK to have more. And you do this quite a bit: state something stupid for which you have no basis and then try to reinterpret it after the fact when someone calls you on it. But maybe I should just realize that you are NEVER wrong.

          • justinbc

            @Anon, my second statement was in respond to a question directly posed to me. Again, not my original remark. I’ve yet to see you, or any of the other anonymous horde, state how exactly that statement was wrong. I suppose in some third world countries where alcohol access is much more limited it’s less likely to happen. There you go, in that instance I’m wrong. Happy?

          • You’re conveniently leaving out what you implied with the second half of your original contribution. That’s where you’re full of shit. Many have chimed in with statements, based in fact, that whether it was an “all night rager” or not does not matter. Yet you tenaciously hold on. My dislike for you is not personal, as you say, we’ve never met. It strictly has to do with my dislike of your online persona, which in my observation combines know-it-all with someone who always has to get in the last word. You’re confirming my opinion with your behavior here today.

          • justinbc

            @Stavros, that’s what you inferred, or the original person who had a problem with the simple fact of me posting anything at all. That’s not my problem, it’s yours. If you continually get this upset by reading what people write online then perhaps you should stick with in-person conversations only.

          • If you *truly* believe that your initial statement was nothing more than an observation and you’re not just engaged in a flailing attempt to justify a stupid and unfounded piece of advice, then you have absolutely no clue about words, what they mean and how they’re perceived. Occam’s razor says otherwise, however.

          • I’m done: again, you’re merely confirming my take. As for the getting upset part, you lay that trope out all the time. Believe me, it takes more than a little back and forth with an internet blowhard to get under my skin. Anonymous @ 11:11, congratulations, and the best of luck. Raising children is a joy. I’m out.

          • justinbc

            @Anon, if you genuinely thought I was giving advice on the subject then you need to reread the part of Occamโ€™s razor that deals with assumptions, because you’re adding them where they are not necessary.

        • Hahahaha!! I’m probably a bit too happy when people call him out ๐Ÿ™‚

        • houseintherear

          Thank you for saying this! I was thinking the same thing.

        • Jesus H Christ. You and all the other whiny net nannies here wouldn’t last 30 seconds in a real social situation. Who the hell cares how many times one user posts? Grow up and find a real issue to get your panties twisted over.

        • Wow. How did this get so ugly so fast? Very hard to read how negative the R&Rs have become lately.

      • For what it’s worth, I thought Justin’s comment was pretty innocuous. Not sure why people up in a huff; you’re cool with me, Justin.

        • justinbc

          Thanks. People will always find someone to vilify, it makes them feel better about themselves.

          • Playing the victim card, really? Everyone is always out to get you and you never did anything to deserve it? Justin, please. Recognize that you have a problem. Dial it back. It’s like you’re trying to take over around here. There are some topics (like gynecology, perhaps) that you can let pass by without hitting “reply”. It’ll make this site more pleasant for most users, including you.

          • justinbc

            I am by no means a victim. That doesn’t mean that people enjoy anonymously subjecting someone to criticism simply because they can, not because it’s justified. There was absolutely nothing controversial about my original statement. The person who posted after me simply stated discontent towards me, and that allowed him/her to phrase their judgment of my statements in that light. If I were just another anonymous profile posting the next person would have had no issue with my statement (as witnessed by them addressing mine, and not the next post which said the same thing), but put a face on someone and it gives them something to hate. Ever wonder why so few people actually use recognizable names or photos? Because it makes others think they suddenly “know” you. Personally, I don’t give a damn what your impression of me is, you’re nothing more than text on a website, so I will use my name, photo, and post as often about whatever I want until it says I’m posting too quickly. You don’t get to dictate how I use the internet. Come talk to me at a happy hour and judge for yourself then.

        • It’s not actually the comment itself. It’s the fact that there are so many comments.

          • Yeah, but…come on. Why get so angry? If a reader thinks someone’s making too many comments, is it that hard to just ignore them and move on? Takes a lot less time and energy than engaging them in a comment-war. Some commenters are super-active on POPville, others less so. Let’s not sweat the small stuff, people.

          • Well sure, but it really make it a less pleasant read when you always have the same people popping up who always seem to have something more definitve to add than everyone else. For me, I used to like reading this site a lot, and now not as much – and it’s mostly due to a small number of “super-active” commenters. FWIW.

          • at the time of my posting Justin has only partaken in 14 of 23 top posts.

          • Anon 2:01 — But the most active commenter of all is you: Anonymous. If you’re tired of reading the posts of “super-active commenters”, maybe you should consider posting using a named persona.

          • Oh wait…never mind, ignore that. I just realized my comment was pretty stupid.

          • I’m not the person who posted as Haynonynony at 4:01. If we’ve now gotten to the point where posters appropriate the names/personas used by other posters, then I’m willing to admit that the trolls have won.

            Yeah, I’m thin-skinned, and not used to how nasty the internet can be. That’s why I’ve — mostly — enjoyed the relative civility of Popville.

        • I thought he was being a bit sarcastic, lighthearted, etc. Didn’t read too much more into it than that, and have a hard time figuring out why so many got up in arms about it. He wasn’t presenting it as solid medical fact. Wasn’t passing judgement. But that’s the thing about this stuff – there’s not font that can convey tone or intent.

          Didn’t realize you need certain credentials prior to posting comments/opinions on a neighborhood blog.

    • Well, I’m not doctor, but my sister had a few drinks (it was NYE….) before she found out she was pregnant. Honestly, a few drinks that early into the pregnancy is no need for you to freak out, assuming of course that it was a few drinks and not a 24/7 binge fest.

      I had luck getting in to Foxhall OBGYN. Not sure if that would be convenient for you, but worth a shot. I’m not even pregnant and have no intentions to be ever or anytime soon at least, but for some reason I thought I needed an OBGYN for other lady things. It’s been easy enough for me to schedule appointments as necessary. Not sure if they are or are not accepting new patients, but worth a shot.

      • justinbc

        Well you’re not a doctor so therefore you have zero grounds to offer any sort of opinion on the matter! OMG INTERNETS!!!@@@

        • I know. I should probably delete that comment seeing as how I have no medical training to back that up. I’ll learn my lesson eventually.

        • houseintherear

          Justin, please stop. I think your comment above just pushed buttons because you’re a childless man who was commenting on something for no reason other to comment on something. Maybe better to stop commenting on it now.

    • Congrats!! You may have already tried Columbia Fertility Associates but if you haven’t, I recommend Dr. Rifka. I wouldn’t worry about the booze. My friend drank for her entire first trimester (unbeknownst to her) and the kid is fine… but I’m no doctor. ๐Ÿ˜‰

    • It takes several weeks for the placenta to form, which means the fetus isn’t “eating what you’re eating” for awhile. Don’t worry about the booze.

      I loved the GW midwives. It can be hard to get into their practice, but I had no problem when I emailed them at about 7 weeks.

    • Congrats!! I had a few drinks before finding out as well and everything looked great at my 10 week ultrasound this morning. After 2 miscarriages, I’m pretty pumped to have seen baby move around in there:)
      I see Dr. Osmun at Reiter, Hill, Johnson, and Nevin. He’s great. Some people don’t like that it’s a huge practice but honestly, everyone I’ve seen so far has been great. Good luck!!

      • Woo hoo! Thats my GYN, and i really like it there.

      • I saw all the docs in this practice throughout my pregnancy and I loved all (but one). It was a great experience, and I was so happy with the one that ended up delivering my son. It is a baby-factory, and always busy in the office, but they are efficient and the OBs are all wonderful.

        • PS – Congratulations! Enjoy!
          PPS – we were in a similar situation of being surprised when it happened and also having had some drinks early on. It’s all good. You’ll have enough else to worry yourself about once the baby is born, don’t worry about this ๐Ÿ™‚

    • Not a specific recommendation – but I just started using services at KaiserPermanente — and had no trouble getting an OB/GYN, although I don’t need the OB part. Given their comprehensive services, I’d bet that if you’re open to getting your medical care through Kaiser, you could have an OB visit scheduled almost immediately.

    • i use women to women obgyn in arlington. i would highly recommend them, if you can get out to ballston easily.

  • Rant: Having to get allergy shots twice a week
    Rave: How much i Love coming home to my puppy.

    • justinbc

      Allergy shots for the dog?

      • Yeah, I have really bad pet allergies, but have been wanting a dog for about 10 years. The shots are intense for about 4 months. Then just a monthly booster. Works for other seasonally allergies, trees, pollens cats too! But this is sooo worth it!

        • justinbc

          Totally understand. I’m a 9 out of 10 to dogs on the allergy scale, but I love them so much I took the meds in order to keep them. I just do a Zyrtec daily and it works fine for me (for cats too, which I’m an 8 out of 10), never knew about the shots. I probably would have gone that route as well, seems like it would be more effective.

  • Rave: I passed the cert for a fed job in San Francisco
    Rave: I gave honest answers and didn’t say I was an expert for any of the questions. Happy when honesty pays off!

    • Haha, I always wonder when I pick the answer “I have performed this task under close supervision” for every single question how many other people with identical experience to mine are like “expert… expert… OH HELL YEAH I’m an expert….”

      • justinbc

        I’ve always answered honestly. Having been the screener and interviewer before, if you lied about and get to that level then it’s usually pretty easy to spot. You’ll get DQ’ed immediately at that point. I would rather have an inexperienced honest person than a liar. To the OP, congrats, I’m quite jealous! (would love to move to SF, but almost never see postings there)

  • Need to buy a dress for an ex’s wedding at the end of Feb. Problem is, I don’t have time to sift through Loehmanns or tens of other stores. Any non-chain options with good hit/miss ratios? Honestly I’ll pay a bit more for quality and the convenience of a well curated store.

    • You could try stitchfix. I unexpected found a great dress at a bridal shop. The only reason I ever tried it was to confirm that the size in that manufacturer fit. The dress was awesome and comparable to the cost of a department store.

    • Try Rent the Runway

    • How formal is the wedding? It’s a little too expensive for me personally, but I have been with several different friends to Betsy Fisher in Dupont and every one of them has found what they need (two needed dresses to wear to weddings, one just wanted something new and two needed clothes for new jobs). It’s expensive, but the service is great. They won’t have anything fancy enough for a more formal wedding, though.

    • I really like the J Crew bridal party dresses, which they try to gear towards bridal parties but are great for wedding attendees too. They frequently have a number of them on sale, they come in tons of colors, the sizing is normal, and the fabric quality is superb. I got one of the tricot silk ones and I just wanted to caress it all the time.

      • justinbc

        +1 J Crew’s wedding stuff is fantastic, classy, and reasonably priced.

      • I’ll second J. Crew, and even though this is also a chain and therefore perhaps not super-helpful, there are occasionally some good basic dresses that are wedding-suitable at Ann Taylor, although I think just online (they’re marketed as part of the bridesmaid collection, but of course plain ‘ol guests can wear them). I was short on time, and just ordered several styles and sizes from the AT website, then returned the ones that didn’t fit. I’d say prices range from on par to a tier below the J Crew collection.

    • What kind of dress are you looking for? I second the recommendations for J.Crew and Betsey Fisher. You could also go to a department store like Saks or Nordstroms and let their personal shoppers do it for you. If you could describe what you have in mind (i.e. formal evening wedding, beach morning wedding) , maybe I/we could make some more specific suggestions.

  • Rave: Ladies Night at the Hardware Store tonight! I’m such a hardware store dork.
    Rave: I picked a paint color- Benjamin Moore Gray Owl at 25%. If it’s too light I can have it bumped up to 50%.
    Rave: buying my paint 20% off tonight!
    All Raves Today: my boss passed on great feedback about me from his boss!
    Raving again: I finally started the T 25 workouts last night. I totally forgot how pumped I get after working out. Even spending time changing, doing the workout and stretching, I still got more done than a normal weeknight because I was just so motivated.
    Raving lunatic at this point: clean house and painting hung.

    • What hardware store is this with the ladies night discounts?

    • There’s a hardware store that gives discounts to women on Tuesday nights? Which one?

    • It would be the Ace “Logan Hardware” store on P St. NW next to the Whole Foods. I need to get a gf so I can get stuff at 20% off LOL.

      • Thanks kken. I would choose to avoid it but I never go there anyway.

        • It’s not the Logan Ace, it’s the 5th Street Ace. It’s a pretty cool event, I went last year and they have demonstrations, reps from some of the brands, lots of staff to answer your questions, and of course snacks.

          • Really? This strikes me as so odd. Why do ladies need their own night? Do hardware stores really need to give out free snacks to get ladies to come in? Why can’t it just be an event inclusive of everyone no matter what their gender?

          • They don’t NEED their own night. It’s just a way for the store to run a few promos, get more people in the door, and create a festive atmosphere for one night which they hope will get people to return to their store in the future.

          • Yes, thanks Anonymous 12:44. I agree.
            I really like the “A few cool hardware store” Aces in DC. They’re very friendly and welcoming and I think this is just another fun event they throw for their customers and yes, to promote more business in their stores.
            I think it’s also to encourage more women to try their hand at being handy. Sure, you can watch youtube videos, but it’s nice to have an in person demonstration of normal home issues and someone to ask if you have questions.

          • justinbc

            Being the one in charge of fixing basically 100% of things that are broken in the house, I fully support this in the event I’m ever not around when something goes wrong!

  • Rave: Made it through a second round of interviews!
    Rant: told a few coworkers who were upset about the interview and it would be a really bad time to leave. I hate tough decisions like this because this job has been great.

    • They’ll get over it. If it’s a good move for you (if you get an offer), take it. Any co-worker/supervisor who begrudges you a good move, even at a time with awkward deadlines, is not someone you should be making sacrifices to continue working with.

  • Rant (sort of): PoP’s posting about a pottery studio reminded me that I have been wanting to find a place to take basket weaving classes. Every time I’ve done an online search for classes in or near D.C. I’ve come up empty-handed. Does anyone know who might offer basket weaving classes, preferably in D.C.?

  • Rant: A little stressed.
    Anticipatory rave: Stress should be over soon.
    Query: I am about to approve a new tenant for a lease to start in early March. How should I be timing/sequencing things as far as signing of the lease, payment of deposit, and payment of first month’s rent? Do I have her sign the lease this week and pay the deposit and first month’s rent at the same time? Or should the deposit be due at the time of lease signing and the first month’s rent not until I give her the keys?

    • Calling justinbc, Victoria, JinDC, and any other landlords…

    • Deposit should be paid at time of lease signing. First month’s rent is due at time of turning over of keys when tenant takes physical possession of apartment. If they want to pay first month’s before then, good for you. Don’t forget to stick the deposit in an interest-bearing account, which is required by law in DC. Best of luck!

    • justinbc

      I always get deposit when the lease is signed. The rent part depends on the tenant, but usually I don’t ask for it until they’ve actually moved in.

    • First – congratulations on being a landlord! My own practices would be appallingly lax to some – but I’ve had good luck being flexible. (I’ve only been burned by taking Section 8.) But basics – get the deposit at lease signing. First month’s rent at their first day of move in.
      I think keeping the deposit in an interest-bearing account only applies if you have a certain number of (more than one) apts. but it’s been a while since I looked this up.

    • Thanks, everyone! Much appreciated.

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