Thank you for being such good sports for this mini-reign of me, the Lord of Petworth.

In between substitution duties, you can find me on Twitter at @ericnuzum and via my Web site as well.

Have a great weekend!

H Street Bakes will be happening again this Saturday, September 10th from 11am to 3pm at the Pug (1234 H Street NE). In case you’re not familiar with H Street Bakes, it’s a monthly pop-up bake sale featuring bakers from H Street NE and the neighborhoods surrounding it. This month, our bakers will include Crunkcakes (boozy cupcakes), biscuit (artisan breads, croissants, and other savory options), and others.

Pick up an extra for me. Yum!

pablo.raw feels my pain over lacking any cute kitten and animal pics–so he sent me a bunch of insect photos.

And who says that stink bugs aren’t cute?!?!?

From the Lord of Petworth mail bag came the above picture with this note:

Here’s a picture of the water spot on my ceiling. My four-year-old says it looks like a pooping turtle.

Cheers!
Emily

I have to hand it to Emily’s youngster–it does kinda look like a turtle making a (slow) dash away from its own poo.

Seeing as we have so many people with water stains, damp walls, and various drenched things, I’m curious if others have spotted pooping turtles, Jesus, the face of Satan, or other unusual markings in their rain-soaked stuff.

If so, post a picture and leave a link.

A reader request:

I know you have posted about peoples’ lost pets, wallets and even umbrellas. I’m hoping you might be able to post about my stolen motorcycle. My beloved ride is a 2-tone black and silver 2000 Honda Shadow ACE 750. My Poor-Man’s-Harley was taken from in front of my house near 14th and Newton some time last night…the same night I brought it home from a thorough tune-up at Modern Classics. I was hoping you might post this email along with the picture to see if someone spots it being ridden, hidden or ditched. Worst of all? My job has recently moved me out to Virgina so I need it now more than ever! ( 2 trains + a bus into Arlington is going to SUCK)

Here’s a FAQ for PoPville:

– I’m pretty sure that it is a “near one of a kind” bike in this area – 2-tone black and silver Honda crusier-style bikes are NOT common around here. That’s why I’m thinking PoPville might actually be able to help me. This isn’t a silver Honda Accord we’re talking about.

– It was parked legally. Just in case I’m an idiot, I checked DCDMV and DPW to see if it has been ticketed or towed. No luck there.

– I have already filed a police report at the 3D substation, called my insurance company, and asked some of my old-school neighbors to keep an eye out. Police have given me a report number. Insurance won’t even start the claim process until 3 weeks have elapsed. Old school neighbors have promised to look around.

– I have lived in CH since 2004, and been parking the bike on the street in this neighborhood since I first bought it. No one has ever tried to steal it before.

– I did not leave the keys in it.

– I am a year-round rider and it is my primary means of transport so it doesn’t sit on the street for long periods. It was my plan to aggressively maintain and ride the bike until it’s last breath in another 10-15 years, so simple replacement with insurance money is sub-optimal.

– I would *greatly* appreciate any help in recovering the bike. (Money, food, beer, and public adulation are all on the table)

Thanks,
El Gringo

Anyone have a tip?

If you’ve been watching television for the past two nights, you’ve probably seen dozens of politicians talking about jobs. Jobs, jobs, jobs. Not to make light of our economic woes, but listening to this rhetoric, you’d think that the answer to everything is to utter the word “JOBS!”

What is the answer to our dependence on foreign oil. “JOBS!”

What’s the cure for cancer? “JOBS!”

How do we find Moammar Gadhafi? “JOBS!”

What is 13 Down in the New York Times Sunday crossword puzzle? “JOBS!”

What do we do about unemployment? “JOBS!”

So with all this talk about jobs, I’d like to pose a hypothetical question.

If the President came to you to lead the PoPville Jobs Program–which provided funding for ONE job that you could use to do anything in our fair city–what would it be? One job to improve life in our fair city?

(Of course, nothing says government program than having a staff person hired to manage one job–but let’s look beyond that.)

You could answer by thinking of something practical like hiring a crossing guard outside of a senior center–or you could hire someone to cut the lawns at vacant property on your block (my personal choice).

Or perhaps you’d rather hire someone to correct the grammar and spelling on corner store signage.

Your choice.

So share your ideas for the ONE job in the PoPville jobs program. What should it be?

From the Lord of Petworth mail bag:

Your Majesty,

I sent this to princeofpetworth@gmail, but if the Prince is away, and
you asked for us readers to ask your advice, so I hope it isn’t gauche
for me to send it to you here as well.

I am almost done with renovations on a house at 11th & V. It’s a 2,500
sq ft (232 m^2) house, 4 bedrooms. I and my gal will be living in the
bedroom on the top floor, and will be renting out the other three, at
which point I guess this counts as a group house.

I’d like your and/or your readers’ advice on how one goes about starting
up a group house. What do residents around here look for? Should I meet
with applicants individually, host an open house? Anything I should look
for/avoid in applicants? And since your readers like to comment on these
things, what’s the going rate these days for a room in a group house (a
block from the U Street metro! Pre-Civil War house newly renovated! 200
sq ft bedrooms! Tall ceilings! Vegetarian kitchen! Spacious front/back
yards! Must see!)?

Thanks,

Ben

Any advice for the reno-group-lovin’ Ben?

Good morning PoPville.

Welcome to the second and final day of this mini-reign of the Lord of Petworth. I am especially happy that, for the first time, I have managed to get through an entire day of filling in for the Prince without embarrassing myself, my neighbors, or (most of) you.

You folks were great yesterday too–playing along well and (kinda) well with each other. I laughed several times at your comments (and then there were the funny ones).

If you have items you’d like to suggest for me today–I’m all ears.

I’m still waiting for those advise questions to roll in. Perhaps you are too shy–perhaps you are too smart.

Regardless, reach me at eric dot nuzum at gmail dot com.

Have a great day.

No one ever sends me any cute animal pictures, so you will have to settle for this.

I recently had a conversation with a friend that stuck with me. I mentioned I was going to stop by my neighborhood liquor store for some, as I call it, “Eric’s Pain Go Bye-Bye Juice.”

“Oh, you shouldn’t do that,” she remarked.

After repeatedly saying that, no, I didn’t have a problem, she stopped me to say:

“No, what I mean is that when you patronize those places, you are supporting them and all the things that come along with them.”

She then listed off a litany of issues: serving the obviously intoxicated, loitering, drug activity, petty crime–all things that she felt gravitated around the liquor store. Her logic: get rid of the store, get rid of the problem. If you can’t get rid of the store, at least don’t shop there.

I had a different view. I think its naive to think that all those problems “go away” if a store isn’t there. All those things will still happen, just perhaps not in that location. So, if that’s the case, why would patronizing it make any difference?

Therefore, shopping at said liquor store is not a tacet endorsement of all those horrible things she mentioned.

What do you think? Who is right? Or, more than likely, is neither of us right?