• Kam

    Rant: Tourist or anyone that stands in the middle of the sidewalk oblivious to others.

    Rant: Large groups of people aka tourist that stand right in front of doors so others can’t get out

    Rant: People that don’t walk in straight lines. I can’t stand it when I am trying to pass people and they seemingly always seem to wonder in my path.

    Rant: We got blown out last week by a score that I have never seen in soccer and today we play the best team in the league. God help us (seriously).

    Rave: Ummmm? It is Thursday meaning it is almost Friday.

    • GDopplerXT

      Rants 1-3: Spot on. Spatial awareness, people!

      Rant 4: Yeah, been there. Not fun. I always just reminded myself that at least it wasn’t my job that I (we) failed at.

      Rave: Correct.

    • SF

      Oh man. The worst are people who are walking along just fine with everybody else and just stop dead in their tracks without looking behind them, seemingly unaware that they are walking with hundreds of other people. Good lord how I hate that.

    • TaylorStreetMan

      Re Rant#3: I call that “wide walking”. Walking like a meandering buffalo, swinging your arms out into other people’s space, shoving your huge purse of packages in other people’s way in a completely oblivious manner, stopping in the middle of a flow of people to check your map/phone/ipod, or to pick your nose or whatever.

      • Kam

        +1. LOL @ meandering buffalo. You pretty much nailed it.

      • PG

        Also, people who walk really slowly in the narrow hallways of my office building. And people who congregate to talk in those hallways.

    • Kam

      Did I mention I work in The NPB so I am right at the shops/metro center where all of the tourist busses seem to come for lunch. You know, I am not even mad about the crowding and all of that just the sheer lack of awarness.

      Oh, I have one more rant while I am on the subject. Groups of people aka tourist that stand either at the beginning or end of a escalator. Really? Seriously? You are just going to stand there? I can kind of (kind of) understand kids because well, they are kids but adults should have more of a clue in life.

      • PG

        What’s the NPB? The first google hits I got for it were Nippon Professional Baseball and National Pork Board.

        • TaylorStreetMan

          mmmmm. Pork.

        • Denizen of Tenallytown

          National Press Building. Very close to the White House, a McDonalds and a bunch of souvenir shops.

          529 14th St NW Washington, DC 20004

          • PG

            I’ve been to the bar there a couple of times. Pretty cool place!

      • P’worth

        aaaaaaah people who stop when getting off an escalator! what. is. wrong. with. them?!

        • Lindsey

          haha, it’s the Escalump! There were signs on metro a few years ago about it.

      • WDC

        The people who stop when they’ve stepped off the escalator are probably snowboarders who also sit down right off the skilift to strap in. At least on the slopes, I can ski over their fingers. There’s no such satisfying recourse with the escalator-morons.

        • TaylorStreetMan

          I assume that if you’re willing to ski over some dude’s fingers (moron or not), then pushing somebody down the escalators should be no big deal to you.

          • WDC

            Good tip, TSM! I’ll try that next time. Thanks!

            Captcha: DUEL (there’s another good option)

          • TaylorStreetMan

            That would be a site! Duel on the escalators. SmartCards at thirty paces.

      • anonymous

        Ha. I work in the building above Buca di Beppo and every day there are at least 4 tour buses lined up outside when I leave work with hoards of bumpkin tourists and teens acting rowdy on the sidewalk waiting for their giganto portions of shitty food while blocking the entire wide sidewalk. It’s better than when I lived right across from the zoo entrance, however.

        Tourists are one thing. Tourists that travel in groups of 100 are a whole other nightmare. It usually just makes me really happy that I’m not them.

    • Kam

      I am so glad to read that I am not the only one that feels this way about these clueless morons. Well I am off to lunch to face said clueless morons. Wish me luck!

      I am also happy that I get to try out Sang on Wheels. Sounds tasty.

      • PG

        Clueless morons bring out the Rat (character from Pearls Before Swine) in me.

      • TaylorStreetMan

        Ah! Sang cuts my hair!
        She also has catered a party for us and her food is delicious! I wish I had her truck parked at my office… jealous.

  • me

    Rant: I hate my g-damn job. I know at least I have one, but I cannot stand it. It makes me hate getting out of bed in the morning and literally dread going to sleep every night because I know I’m waking up in a short while just to come back here.

    Rave: My husband got me flowers yesterday because he knew I was down in the dumps. So I get to look at them on my desk.

    Rant/rave: Just found out that my parents are coming for 5 days and they will be here tomorrow evening. While it’s nice to see them (they’re coming from about 10 hours away), I’ve got a LOT of cleaning to do before they show up!

    • M

      I hear ya on Rant#1. I stayed up too late last night because I know once I fall asleep, the next thing I have to do is come to work.

      Rave #1: I like money, and it pays me money.
      Rave #2: I only hate my gig 2 days/week. Gigs on remaining days are splendid.

  • Kerry

    Yesterday I was driving home from work in Spring Valley. I normally take U Street but for some reason I felt like taking T because I didn’t want to sit in all the traffic. When I got to 15th and T I see this guy riding a bike-he takes the corner suppppper wide and I’m thinking ‘what the heck is this guy doing, does he want to get hit.’ Then a few seconds later I see this girl running and she is running faster than I’ve ever seen anyone who runs run. So I think ‘wow this girl really must be into running.’

    I get to a speed bump or a stop sign or something and the biker goes down an alley, and I hear the girl yelling. I figure out that he stole her phone. I turn down the alley to try to follow him/see where he went but I’d already lost him. The girl comes running up to my car, I let her in and we drove around U Street for a minute trying to see him but by then he was long gone. Then we went to the police station by there and told them the whole story.

    Basically the girl was going for a jog and she pulled out her phone to change a song and the guy literally yoinks it out of her hand. Who does that.

    The guy was a black male on a blue bike. He had short hair and was young-probably between 16-25. Not that it would matter at this point but he was wearing a white shirt. I think he got to U Street around where the Sunoco is-maybe around 14th?

    So that was some excitement for the day.

    • andy

      that is a heck of a story. glad i don’t run with a music player.

    • textdoc

      Wow. Quite a story! (And good one on you for helping a stranger try to reclaim her phone from a thief.)

    • greent

      “Who does that.”

      Have you not been reading about all the iphone thefts? DC teenagers do this, every damn day. Even theft for fun – I have seen smashed phones in MXMHP park – 2 of them this past week alone.

      This is why one should run with a baseball and a mini baseball bat. One to throw, one to swing. 5 points if you can hit the kid at all, 10 points if you hit the kid with the bat and he falls off the bike, 30 points if you bean the kid with the baseball while his gramama shouts “he’s a good boy!” from her porch.

      Ahhh love my hood.

    • Anonymous

      I hate to say it, but you should probably never run in the city with earphones in your ear. It’s like swimming with the sharks with steaks in your pocket.

  • herewegoagain

    rant: The fledgling cat birds and squirrels are eating my ripening tomatoes.

    rave: I have tomatoes ripening in my garden!

    • anonymous

      woah! what’s a cat bird?

    • Can you cover your tomatoes with some kind of cage?

      • andy

        also, can you cover the birds with some kind of cage?

      • herewegoagain

        Yeah, I have some chicken wire I wrap around it. Ugly but effective. It is just a pain becuase it is hard to get it tight enough to keep the birds off and fasten it to the tomato supports without damaging the plant. I haven’t done it yet this year. My plant is in a different spot and I was hoping they wouldn’t find it.

  • Back on the Hill

    Rave: I teach a grad class every spring, and most of my students are AWESOME. 99% of them.

    Rant: Kids these days! Even the awesome ones! Didn’t think I needed to teach grad students how to approach profs post-graduation in terms of career assistance, etc. Facebook messages are not the way! And NO, I will NOT MAKE A CALL TO EVERY COLLEAGUE I HAVE to get you a job. Especially if you don’t even send me your resume. Or say thank you for the calls I HAVE placed on your behalf. And then when I say I’d like to talk with you in person about the whole thing, can I ring you to schedule a time for coffee? you have the balls to say that you’re “kinda busy” these days.

    I’m sorry, WHAT?? YOU want ME to do you favor upon favor, yet you don’t have time to talk about the favors themselves?!?!?

    Makes me very cranky, annoyed, and aggravated as it’s the first communications I’ve had this morning. Very not cool.

    Rave: I really wanted to vent about this, but didn’t know how. Thank you, PoP, for providing my ranting outlet.

    • Anonymous

      Rave: You just reminded me of why I’m so glad I left my job at GW

    • WDC

      Being around youth these days makes my ears bleed. I take the AU shuttle from metro to campus; please accept this humble transcription of a recently overhead conversation.
      “So, I mean, it’s OBVIOUS that the professor hasn’t even read The Fountainhead, but when I totally proved him wrong on something, he was all, like, that doesn’t apply here, and I was like, oh my god, that is SO disrespectful. The Fountainhead can be adapted to, like, anything.”

      • textdoc

        Actual LOL!


      • PG

        I have a friend who used to work on a pretty big college campus. He told me he once heard a student on a cell phone say (probably to a parent), “I’m out of sweatpants. Can you Fed Ex some to me?”

        • Anonymous

          No joke, my roommate’s mom feded’d him a banana once because he said he was getting cramps from running.

          AND it was a state school!

          • Anonymous


      • Emmaleigh504

        Fun fact: The Fountainhead is the only Gary Cooper movie I’ve seen that I hate. Even his shirtless, oiled up body can’t redeem it.

        Also, youth of today suck.

  • PG

    Rant: Had band practice last night instead of Thursday night this week. Now I keep thinking today is Friday.

    Rave: Leaving work early tomorrow and going to the beach tomorrow. So today IS like Friday for me! :P

    • PG

      Oops, I meant leaving work early today!

      • PetworthRes

        I think you should just go head and leave right now :)

  • J

    Rant: people who involve themselves in issues they have no business being involved in just so they can impress people

  • Emmaleigh504

    Rave: I still have all my hair.

  • Megan

    Rave: My puppy. She is simply the greatest joy in my life.

    Rant: Her refusal to sleep past 6:30am, no matter how late I keep her up the night before.

  • GiantSquid

    Rant: Mr. Squid is away for work in a place that has no email, no cell coverage for a while. I’m a sad panda.

    Rave: Being remarkably productive in an effort to not become horrifically depressed about it.

    • TaylorStreetMan

      I say (depending on how long you’re in said place): enjoy your unplugged-ness. Go outside and sit in the grass, listen to the birds, walk down the street without ear buds, read a book (not on a kindle), talk to a stranger.

      It’s interesting to me how much withdrawal some people* go through when separated from their devices…

      *This may not apply to you, GiantSquid. I’m just sayin’.

      • GiantSquid

        I’m not unplugged, he is and not in the same place as me, so we cannot communicate. I, for one, usually enjoy conversing with my significant other. This is worse than long-distance dating. At least then we could talk every night.

        I’m all about reading a book, listening to music without earbuds, playing with the dogs, etc. I’d rather do it when I have the option of talking to my husband.

        (mopes off stage left…)

        • TaylorStreetMan

          Sorry. I misread. My philosophy is still the same, though.
          I hope Mr. Squid comes home soon.

  • Andy(2)

    Rant: With all the escalators out I hate the folks that use the working down escalator and half the non-working/stairs (see metro center orange – red transfer at 530pm any day).

    Rave: Going to Seattle for the weekend!
    Rave: Sister is in town next week!

    • Banksy

      Are you complaining about people using a working down escalator to go up? If not, why would you hate people who use the down escalator to go down? Isn’t that what it’s meant for?

      • Anonymous

        I think what Andy(2) means is complaining about is fucktards who flunked kindergarten and behave thusly: People are on the orange line and get off at metro center to transfer to the red line. There are three escalators: one is broken and under repair (fenced off), one is functioning to take people up, and one is broken and being used as stairs. Said fucktards, instead of just using the one that is going up will also decide to walk up the being used as stairs one, thus leaving people coming from the red line to the orange line no place to go. A similar phenomenon occurs when there is only one escalator, it is being used as stairs, and the kindergarten drop-outs decide to use both sides as opposed to having the common sense of a brain damaged monkey and simply using only one side so that people can go up and down. These people should be shot on sight, no trial, no jury, just a bullet to the head.

        • Anonymous

          meant to say ” I think what Andy(2) is complaining about.” Delete “means.”

        • NE Groover

          Agreed. I always use the actual staircase opposite the escalators, imagine that!

  • heather

    rave: which involves the topic of youth of today suckage…
    been living on the “Kalorama” side of Adams Morgan for years now, next to the people park, that’s right, not dog park (that is a potential rant) and lately i have seen so much more random police presence, reminiscent of some Mayberry style of policing. just officers riding their bikes through. meeting people. heck, watching the kiddos playing basketball. it’s really nice and i have often wondered why police like that didn’t exist around here. ones who know the neighbors, keep a mindful eye, don’t intimidate and command respect that way. it’s a simple change like that that makes my neighborhood feel safer. RAVE.

    • Anonymous

      Because for 30+ years a majority of the population was openly hostile to having a police presence at all.

      • Anonymous

        woah now. that s a pretty fucking stupid thing to say.

  • NE Groover

    RANT: Sooooooo tired of hearing people complain about broken escalators.

    RAVE: I wish I had one.

  • RnR

    Rant: tourists who flip out when getting on and off the metro. Yes, the door is going to open, no, no one in your family is getting off by accident, shut the hell up. Similarly, don’t block my path standing on the platform screaming to your family members to check if they all got off ok.

    • Emmaleigh504

      I love when a tourist family gets on and kids are all, which stop are we going to? Then they look at the map and look out the windows like their parents are clearly doing it wrong.

      Cracks me up every time.

      • andy

        Had to chuckle about the Moms yelling, “don’t get off!”

        I’ve heard it so many times!


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