You’re either drunk or bored by now so enjoy this bit of March mishigas from the Cleveland Park listserv:
“8:15 this morning [Thursday] I was retrieving my supercan to put it in the garage. 2600 block Woodley Place. A middle-aged man in a red jacket walking his black and white bulldog dropped a bag of dog waste in an already emptied supercan.
I picked it out and chased after him to inform him We do NOT do that in this neighborhood, and take it with him.
He of course was obnoxious and refused. I threw it trying to hit him in the head. (I’m obnoxious too).
A police cruiser happened to be coming along, asked them to catch up with him. Of course they’re not much interested.
I do have photos of him and his dog I am happy to share with you. Do you know who this is? Where he lives?”
My favorite reply:
“I’d also like to think that we don’t throw bags of dog sh*t at other people’s heads in this neighborhood, regardless of the provocation.”