“I got asked directions by a man who then tried to grab the family jewels”


What the hell is going on today…

A reader reports:

“Walking down an alley [between Seaton and T] in Bloomingdale yesterday I got asked directions by a man who then tried to grab the family jewels. He’s thin, six foot, tan skin (Hispanic, Mediterranean, Italian, etc), short cropped hair, purple button down, olive green pants. Thought other folks in the area might be warned.”

28 Comment

  • leftcoastsouthpaw

    Maybe it was his way of thanking you for directions? Kind of like an butt slap in baseball.

    • Emmaleigh504


      • Glad to see you find sexual assault so funny.

        • Emmaleigh504

          Well when the guy talks about someone attempting to grab the “family jewels” it lightens the mood. I find sports butt slaps weird, so I found leftcoastsouthpaw’s observation amusing. I am sorry this happened to the OP.
          To be clear: Sexual assault and attempted sexual assault is wrong no matter who the victim is.

          • Victims often try to soften the emotional impact of assault by pretending it wasn’t a big deal. After the constant campaigns explains that just because a woman isn’t crying the next day it doesn’t mean she wasn’t assaulted I would expect more.

            Sexual violence is never funny.

          • Emmaleigh504

            “Victims often try to soften the emotional impact of assault by pretending it wasn’t a big deal.” You are correct. I wish it never happened, but when does I hope the victims report it. More importantly, I hope the police take the victims seriously. I’ve heard so many stories of the police saying, “well if you weren’t wearing x” or “it was a compliment, what’s the problem”.
            I still find what leftcoastsouthpaw wrote amusing. I have a dark sense of humor and am clearly a terrible human being.

    • I’m sorry this happened to you, and sorry that some find this an occasion for jokes.

      It’s very common for an attacker to test out a potential victim’s “attackability” by first initiating an innocent interaction. If the potential victim responds (ideally pleasantly), then the attacker is far more likely to attack.

      Unfortunately, this means that a way to increase one’s non-victimhood is to be rude to strangers on the street.

  • In some cultures, this is equivalent to shaking hands.

  • I have to wonder if this is the same guy I encountered a few months ago- the description here seems pretty similar. He asked me for a cigarette, and when I told him I don’t smoke, he said, “That’s cool, man.” and walked away. He got about a half block down the street (RI Ave NW between 5th and 6th) then turned and bellowed at me “THEN F*** YOU TOO, A**HOLE!”

    • Black guy, French accent? I may have encountered him once around 8th and RI NE. He asked me about a few things and I got bored and said I had to go, wished him a good one, he said “yeah man you too”; I walked away and heard him spit and say verbatim what you heard.

  • I’m sorry to see folks making light of this. This is straight up sexual assault, period, and shouldn’t happen to anyone. I hope OP made a police report.

    • justinbc

      Yeah, the discrepancy in responses between posts here from women who get commented at by street vagrants, and a man who is actually physically grabbed, is kind of disappointing. Not that people shouldn’t be pissed that women have to go through that daily, but have a little sympathy for this guy too? Not every dude wants to be touched at all times of the day.

      • Blithe

        Justin, I quite agree with you — but I also realize that I have very little understanding of how PoPvillagers prioritize and slant their/our comments. This week, two posts about yuppies getting arrested for what they realize is illegal behavior have garnered over 300 comments, while a post on a 16 year old found dead in the river has garnered 2. It’s a puzzlement.
        I agree with sproc: this shouldn’t happen to anyone. I hope the OP reports it to the police and that the assailant gets caught.

        • justinbc

          The amount of comments isn’t as concerning as those who think it’s joke worthy.

          • Blithe

            I’m thinking: both. The attitude of the comments and the number of comments, to me, seem to reflect what’s viewed as a serious issue and what is not. Either way, I find jokes about assault, particularly sexual assault, troubling.

      • Spot on. Apparently men don’t matter. A guy gets his balls grabbed and it’s a joke. A girl gets whistled at or picture taken in the park and it’s a police matter, community safety meetings, they say mace the guy, or he is a pedo or sex offender etc……..but…..this….ball grab incident, gets jokes.

        • Emmaleigh504

          If men would quit sexually assaulting people, we’d be well on the way to no one being sexually assaulted.

          • We’d be halfway towards nobody being assaulted. And if people like you stopped ignoring half the problem we would also be a lot closer.

          • Emmaleigh504

            More than 1/2 way and I’m not ignoring any of the problem.

      • Isn’t it amazing? They come out in droves and used words as creep etc…..then quick to say others are victim shaming. I don’t even comments in those posts any more because they’ve become nothing but an excuse to man bash. Its a shame actually.

        • it appears 1 guy made 1 inappropriate joke about the OP and now everyone is ragging on woman and posts about woman getting harassed. Let’s tone down the menininism and focus on this report of sexual harassment & assault.

      • There is outrage on posts about street harassers because those things happen to women on a daily basis and most women I know are sick to death of it. And yes, street harassment can and often does involve getting grabbed, as the poor OP is aware of. But I don’t think you can extrapolate the entire POPulace’s view on sexual battery against men just because one person made a crappy comment. Plenty of people see fit to make crappy comments on the street harassment threads.

      • He wasn’t actually physically grabbed. Read the OP’s account again. This was an attempt (“tried to”).

  • General Grant Circle

    Props for reporting.
    This kind of thing gets under-reported and swept under the rug far too often.

  • That’s like the time I swiped a subway card for someone (feeling sorry for him) and he grabbed my crotch really hard and squeezed. (I’m a woman.) I had had the worst day ever and had a baby who never slept and had no energy, but if I had, I would have chased him down and tried to take him out.

    Sorry for your experience–it’s really shocking when that happens, especially when you are trying to be nice.

  • I’m sorry this happened to you, OP. It feels like you’re dammed if you interact in any way with anyone in this city (robbed, groped, harassed, stabbed, shot, raped, etc.). On the flip side if you ignore or look away you could miss situations in which someone needs your help or you get cussed at and called names for “ignoring” someone.
    I’ve only been here 8 years and I know it’s anecdotal, but man does some of this feel more pervasive.

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