Secret Document that Restaurants use to Keep Tabs on Dan Silverman Revealed

Photo by PoPville flickr user streetamatic

Earlier this week the Washingon CityPaper’s Jessica Sidman revealed This Secret Document Helps D.C. Restaurants Keep Tabs on Food Writers. It revealed a number of names including her own:

Jessica Sidman:

Jessica Sidman rarely reviews restaurants, but is eagle eyed when it comes to finding information about restaurants and writing about trends in the industry. The ultimate beat reporter, she is engaging and funny but can be unforgiving if not impressed. A seasoned journalist, her current post at the City Paper brings out the snark more often than any other outlet. Her writing leans more towards food culture than about the food itself.

Position: Food Editor at Washington City Paper

Writing Level: Expert

Food & Beverage Knowledge: Intermediate

Likes: Innovative menus, asking tough questions, insight into the “why” of a dish or concept

Dislikes: Novelty for the sake of novelty, overpriced dishes, obvious or condescending menu descriptions

Seat With: Most enthusiastic/knowledgable server

I’ve been a little shy about my own discovery but I figure I better take this opportunity to share it as well. I had the following translated by renowned linguist Wilhelm von Humboldt.

Dan Silverman:

Dan Silverman rarely eats in restaurants, but his knowledge of who resided in the space before the current tenant is unmatched. While he lacks an extensive vocabulary, he has the eyesight of a young Ted Williams and can occasionally spot a typo faster than Arvind Mahankali. It is well known that Silverman sports one of the finest haberdashery collections on the east coast so do not ask him to remove his hat. Having said that he drinks with the passion of a John Riggins and will occasionally misplace his hat. Have a hat spotter at all times. Though Silverman boasts the maturity of a young Tom Sherwood – please don’t use any double entendres when explaining menu items. It is very likely Silverman will have forgotten the name of the restaurant he is visiting so be sure to send him a press release that he can cut and paste.

Position: Prince of Petworth

Writing Level: Not too bad for one with a public education

Food & Beverage Knowledge: Advanced beginner with the exception of Iced Teas

Likes: Iced Tea, onions, small words, brown and clear liquors, obvious menu descriptions and beer.

Dislikes: capers

Seat With: Most patient server