“All I want is permission for a handyman to drill a couple of holes in the concrete for mounting the handrails.”

“Dear PoPville,

Our DC rowhouses aren’t conducive to “aging in place”. My wife and I are both getting on in years, and we’re becoming a bit unsteady on our legs, needing handrails to manage stairs. For that reason, last fall I bought a couple of nice steel handrails for our front steps, needing merely to be bolted in place.

Permits are required, because our steps are, as is frequently the case, on Public Space (and Mount Pleasant is in a Historic District). I was determined to go through the proper permit process, as an example to my ANC constituents, whom I advise to file for permits, rather than just doing the work and hoping that nobody complains.

I’ve been in Permit Purgatory for more than four months now,

as DDOT takes an inordinate amount of time to respond with “corrections” required for my application. Historic, marvelously, was no problem at all. Nor was DCRA. But DDOT — well, today, after stalling my job for months, came up with the killer blow to my little handrails project, demanding a Traffic Control Plan:

Missing TCP Any time there is construction although it is not blocking the sidewalk nor the road, a TCP must be provided. It is a requirement. Therefore: – A proper Traffic Control Plan must be submitted that matches the current roadway configuration, as well as pavement markings – Plan must follow the Traffic Control Plan (TCP) Submittal Guidelines 19th Edition, February 14, 2018 – A typical or handwritten will not be accepted. The TCP must be legible and follow the Guidelines – The TCP shall include two full main intersections and it shall include existing pavement markings – Appropriate signage shall be included as per MUTCD 2009 with its appropriate sequences – In addition, the applicant shall include the number of parking spaces in TOPS (dimension box) – The Contractor usually provides this document since they know how the work will be completed.

Contractor? All I want is permission for a handyman to drill a couple of holes in the concrete for mounting the handrails. There’s no contractor, and plainly what’s being required here is more than Joe Homeowner can handle.

Now, how can I advise any neighbor to file for permits for their home-improvement jobs, when DDOT throws up insurmountable obstacles like this?”