Help Getting an Abandoned Wrecked Car Removed?

“Dear PoPville,

We found a navy blue Cadillac in the parking garage at Techworld (800 K Street) in Chinatown that has been wrecked and abandoned. It’s parked in an area reserved for Hotel Valet in two spots with a dented front fender and destroyed front right tire. It’s clearly been in an accident with something white. We called MPD to have them come look at the vehicle and maybe match it up with any reports of a hit and run but upon calling them and asking for a report to be taken they said “That’s not gonna happen” and hung up.”