Random Reader Rant and/or Revel

Photo by PoPville flickr user Beau Finley

You can talk about whatever is on your mind – quality of life issues, a beautiful tree you spotted, scuttlebutt, or any random questions/thoughts you may have. But please no personal attacks and no need to correct people’s grammar. This is a place to vent and/or celebrate things about daily life in DC.

206 Comment

  • Rant: Sirens like CRAZY this morning around 4/4:30 in Hill East (could hear it from near 13th & D NE). Never went back to sleep. Any idea what was going on?

  • Rant: Patricia, possibly the strongest storm in recorded history. Hope everyone down there is safe and somehow makes it through this.

    • +1. Also, I know this is a stupid small concern in the midst of genuine danger for so many people, but I’m kinda bummed that this storm shares a name with my mom – she’s the nicest person in the world!

      • A relatively mild hurricane with my name came through when I was in HS. I clipped newspaper headlines and made a collage. “[Myname] Pounds Coastal Towns,” and “[Myname] Heads Out To Sea,” and “President Clinton Urges Residents to Prepare For [Myname],” and similar gems. Wonder if it’s still in my parents’ attic…?

  • Rave: Survived my first performance review. Strong hints that a great position will be available at the end of the fellowship.
    Rant/Rave: After the conversation, I thought it over more and decided it’s best for all involved if I leave my rotation at the end of this year. Well…best for all except for “gaining agency,” so I’m dreading that conversation.
    Rant: I think about work too much. I could really use a solid week long break.

  • emvee

    Rant: Dog we’re watching for a friend who is super sweet is also super anxious and not used to being in a city. It led to lots of whimpering last night and the occasional bark. I broke my rule of no-dogs-in-bed so I could at least spoon her and hold her in place. Her barking would get my dog excited and he’d think we were going for a walk anytime I woke up to shush the other one, leading him to start prancing around trying to herd everyone to the door (ah, border collie blood). I’ll be needing various bonus cups of coffee today. It’s a good thing the friend’s dog is cute. So many times I wanted to yell at her and she’d give me the saddest, “I’m scared!” face.
    Rave: Ladies’ night at All Fired Up!
    Rant: Discussions with the SO about whether or not to stay in DC long-term, especially with the violence we’ve seen over the past year. I’m tired of waking up to sirens and cops outside, or worse, the gun shots and absence of cops.

  • Rave: MILK BAR. OMG.

  • Rant: New upstairs neighbor is loud — really loud, like slamming doors at 3-4 am every weekend (and last night). Am thinking he/she is a clubber or something along those lines. I’m fine with normal apartment noise — I can hear them walk, and that’s OK, but the door slamming is a little intense as it wakes me up through industrial grade earplugs.

    So here’s my question: I would like to say something, because it probably can’t get much worse, right? Can I send them this note:

    “Hey [Apt #]!

    [My name] the neighbor here — welcome to the building! I’ve noticed over the past couple of weekends and last night that you can be night owls — can you do me a favor and try to close your bedroom (I think?) doors more quietly if it’s around 3 or 4 (am)?

    I work weird hours so it would mean a lot — I have a bottle of wine to bribe you with if you want to text (XXX-XXX-XXXX) to meet up.

    Happy Friday,

    [My name]”

    Is this asking for a disaster?

    • Probably better if you can do it in person rather than in a note.

      • Emmaleigh504

        If the note is signed and has the apartment number, I don’t see a problem with it. But I’m the sort of person that would rather a note than having to talk to my neighbors (unless they are cute) πŸ™‚

        • My natural inclination would be to leave a note, but there’s so much opportunity with a short note for people to misread the intended tone. So I would try make myself be brave and actually go talk to the neighbors.

          • Emmaleigh504

            If I were the loud neighbor I would want the note. I’ve been a good adult and talked to my loud neighbor, but I felt badly about it b/c it broke up the (very loud) party. I guess it’s awkward and uncomfortable no matter how it goes down.

      • I agree with textdoc. A conversation will be more awkward than a note, but people are less likely to react negatively to person-to-person contact. And you won’t run the risk that they will read a tone into the note that you don’t intend.

    • emvee

      I recently left a very similar note to my upstairs neighbors who then proceeded to throw a party, have people outside my bedroom window drunk and high at like 3AM, and I swear have pet elephants they parade around without rugs just BECAUSE I left that note. Proceed with caution. My sympathies are with you.

    • Can you leave the wine with the note? I think that might go a long way! Or champagne instead of wine? Everyone loves champers, right?

      • I guess I’m just worried someone will take the wine, as it’s a large apartment building with a lot of foot traffic… but it’s something to consider.

      • I was just at a bachelorette party in the rural Midwest last weekend where I bought two bottles of champagne for the pre-party dinner at her house. Neither got opened. I kept suggesting to the bridesmaids that we should at least get a picture of the bride popping a bottle. Everyone kept saying “sure but…no one’s going to actually DRINK it. Champagne is gross.” I’m surprised I didn’t faint.

        • I’m with everyone. When I lived in France, I had to choke down a little bit at every dinner party, but tried to move on to the wine as quickly as possible. Or else request a pastis…

        • … who are these people?

        • Emmaleigh504

          I do not understand! Champagne and sparkling wine are my jam! You haven’t lived if you haven’t had champagne with a cheeseburger.

        • Some people just don’t like it. We were at a family party once where the host did a toast to my dad. My siblings went through the motions to be polite, then lined up to hand over their untouched glasses of champagne to me. It was a good night.

        • phl2dc

          I don’t have any feelings about champagne. I think it’s just kinda blah.

    • I’m late to this (hopefully quiet) party but I think if you haven’t met them yet, you don’t want this to be the first interaction. Introduce, yourself, invite them for wine, try earplugs and white noise and letting them settle, and then approach them. Excessive? Maybe. But very few people are rudely loud on purpose and putting someone on the defensive to begin rarely works out well.

  • palisades

    Rave: Went to Old Europe last night for dinner with the family. It was everything I hoped it would be! It wasn’t the best German food I’ve ever had but the experience alone was worth it.

  • I saw a Tesla convertible with tags “BYBYGAS”

  • I Dont Get It

    Rant/Rave; Lizzy and Lucy were very suspicious about Benadryl hidden in peanut butter so after chasing them around the kitchen I finally took it and had a nice nights sleep.

  • Emmaleigh504

    Rant: how long does it take to pick telework days? you only have tuesdays to choose from.
    Rant: IBM
    Rave: new dishwasher and bonus new light fixtures! I love Bernstein.

  • hammers

    rave/rant: today’s Friday Question. Very interesting to see what else y’all do in this city. Alternatively, it makes me realize I’ve never really been happy with a Big Desk Job, though I like my Desk Job pay pretty well. I guess I liked working at a preschool in college alright- but I doubt the feeling of restlessness would ever escape me.
    neither rant nor rave: wondering if all the people contemplating moving out of dc could lead to cheaper apartments when the time comes for me to move.

    • Probably not because I think there was somewhat of a cycle before this. People move into the city in their 20s and then move out in their 30s or 40s. Then new people in their 20s move in to replace them. Yeah, there seems to be more violence now, but I still know a number of people moving to the city or looking to move to it.

      • Accountering

        There is a TON of latent built up demand. Most everyone I know has tried, or would like to try living in the city at one point. I have several friends and a couple coworkers who would like to live in DC at some point.

      • anonymouse_dianne

        And the recent Post article on Empty Nesters moving back to the city and competing with millennials for apartments. Tysons Corner anticipating high demand for studios and one bedrooms and now finds high demand for two bedrooms. Interesting. I am so excited to see the city coming back to life! I now live on 14th street which growing up and forever was devastated by the riots and then home to hookers and topless bars.

    • It’s a never-ending cycle. All across this great nation there are thousands of student council presidents just dreaming of working here. An endless supply, bless their hearts. (Not to mention all the law students.)

  • Rant: Hope this hurricane that’s headed towards Mexico weakens and doesn’t make an impact at all. Strongest storm in recorded history, sheesh.
    Rant: Extremely tired, kinda feeling like I’m getting sick so I’m trying to fight it of.
    Rave: That Adele song goes man…
    Rave: It’s Friday, want to take the future wifey out for a nice meal…any recommendations on a paella place in Maryland? Preferably w/in MoCo?

    • Cubano’s in Silver Spring used to have excellent paella—I would eat it every chance I got. But Cubano’s overall really went down (Tom Sietsema and I agreed on this) about two years ago and I quit going there…so, not sure. But, now I’m really hungry for their “old” paella.

    • Is there a Jaleo or La Tasca in MoCo? Perhaps they would have paella?

      • There is! In Rockville, but I prefer to eat in less established restaurants. I may have found one in DTSS, will let you know how it is.

  • Rant: Looking at schooling options for when we move to Baltimore has me irritated and not wanting to move. I’d like to keep at least middle anonachild in a dual language program, and my options are either semi-affordable Catholic school or completely unaffordable (yet they actually say on their website that they are affordable?!) multi-lingual Montessori. I am hesitant to send her to Catholic school mainly because of the religious aspect and already knowing how the Church feels about a divorced single mom of three shacking up with a heathen who used to follow the rules but doesn’t anymore. But I refuse to pay $12k a year for Elementary school. Starting to feel like I should delay the move for another couple years lol.
    Rave: At least housing is much cheaper? As far as crime goes, well, pretty much the same!
    Rant: No matter which way I cut it, I really don’t want to leave DC. I’m worried I will eventually resent my BF if I do leave.

    • Are there schools around Roland Park/Gilford worth considering?
      Or, would your BF move to DC?

      • He can’t leave his area for various completely legitimate reasons.
        Both schools I am looking at are in the Fells Point area, and I haven’t found any other schools that are actually dual language vs they offer another language as a special or enrichment-type course. I don’t feel that she would benefit from this model anymore than she would if I sent her to public school and did Spanish tutoring on the side (which is an option). The one thing that would concern me about the Rolland Park/Gilford area (and does concern me about the Montessori school) is lack of diversity, and also being the poor kid in the school. The divide among racial and socioeconomic line in Baltimore City is just incredible to me.

    • Can boyfriend move to DC?

    • Every Catholic school is, I’m sure, different but at the school my kids went to a divorced mom of three would have raised nary an eyebrow — or no more eyebrow than background gossip that any new mom would generate anywhere. One of the most involved women at the school told me that she his her marriage to what appeared to be a long-time live-n boyfriend because she got a tuition discount for being a single mom. They had a support group for the children of divorce (and maybe for the parents). And this was in a very white-bread parish. Urban Catholic schools have been the go-to for middle class parents for so long that they’ve seen pretty much everything. And, despite being baptized, communioned and confirmed, both kids turned out pretty liberal and agnostic, so I wouldn’t worry about the getting too papist on you.

      • This is good to hear. I know that the level of “issue” with it can vary greatly from diocese to diocese and parish to parish. At the parish I belonged to, I literally went from being held in pretty high esteem as a catechist to your dead to us within a few weeks when I left my ex. But I also know parishes here in DC that are very liberal. I suppose the worst thing that could happen is she could re-discover her faith and decide she wants to be a nun – or worse – a Conservative Republican **shudders**

        • I imagine the expectations are pretty different for being a parent of a kid in a Catholic school vs. being an actual congregant in a Catholic church. Don’t lots of non-Catholics send their kids to Catholic schools?

          • I suppose that depends on the school? I know that there is an expectation that even if you aren’t Catholic that you adhere to the values or at least stay quiet if you don’t. Also, I am technically a Catholic, albeit a non-practicing one. We tend to get judged a little more harshly than non-believers. Then again, part of me is like, fuck ’em – go ahead and judge me. I just don’t want my kid judged. I am probably putting way more worry into it than is necessary or warranted.

          • emvee

            As an incredibly lapsed-Catholic, regardless of 13 years of Catholic school, Catholic school doesn’t mean your child becomes Catholic. My siblings and I all did 13 years and have come out as level-headed adults capable of rational thought, even with incredibly Catholic parents. The non-believers in my classes still had to go through the motions, mass, religion class, etc, and just lay low. If you do end up sending your kids to Catholic school, you may want to check in on things that may be contentious. Like making sure your kids know gay people aren’t the devil, you don’t go to hell for not telling a priest your sins, etc.

            Unrelated to Catholicism, I know plenty of kids who went to public schools in Baltimore county who are smart, driven adults and don’t feel like they missed anything by attending public school!

            To sum up: your kids, your choice. Do what works best for you all.

        • There may be a difference between the church and the school, as well. I think school families operate on a pretty practical level — if you show up for the car wash, they like you (I even made peace with a friend’s ex-wife who loathed me) at the car wash. Chruchgoers may be more dogmatic.
          Plus, you have a boyfriend, so your not out to “Steal their menfolk.” πŸ™‚

        • Thanks Emvee πŸ™‚ To be perfectly honest, they have come across so much diversity here that I think she would have a hard time with anyone saying that there is anything wrong with being gay, trans, or anything else. So I probably am worried over nothing. Also, I have complete confidence in Baltimore County schools, the only reason I am considering something else for her is because she’s done dual language for three years and I’d like her to continue.

          • First off, in case anyone were to believe it, Catholics do not think gay people are “the devil” and it’s insulting for someone to insinuate that. Christ welcomes all, and so does the Church. But Catholics have flaws, biases, weaknesses and quirks just like everyone else.

            That said, the Church has its teachings, sacrament, and practices and the faith community looks to its members for sincere support, guidance and grace in following the Lord as Catholics. It would seem unethical for someone to knowingly enter into a Catholic school community if they both reject the teachings of the Church plan to undermine those who do accept them.

          • emvee

            Sorry, I should have specified. My years of exposure to the Catholic church allowed me to meet some amazing people who worked tirelessly for social justice issues. My parents, both wonderful people, are still devout and practicing Catholics. My experience with the church, overall, however, has been that they do not treat those in the LGBT community with the respect they deserve. I remember a teacher in grade school telling us not to trick-or-treat at a certain house in the neighborhood because a gay couple lived there. Again, I realize it is not all Catholics that treat the LGBT community this way, but isn’t even one Catholic treating them as such bad enough?

          • A sustained and organized campaign of marginalization and abuse, dismissed as a “quirk.” Now I’ve heard everything.

          • Hi PetworthCatholic, thank you for reaffirming exactly why I left the Church in the first place! How exactly would I or my daughter be undermining the school community? By our simple existence? You see, a truly welcoming Catholic – person or community – would have said of course you and your daughter would be welcomed into a Church community, especially your daughter since she has nothing to do with the “sins” of her mother, and especially considering she is, in fact, a baptized Catholic. But you know, go ahead and call me unethical!

          • Also, PetworthCatholic, You should really pick up a copy of the Catechism of the Catholic Church and check out what the difference between a teaching and a dogma is. You see, it is perfectly 100% ok for a practicing, in communion with the Church Catholic to disagree and seek to change a teaching of the Church. Even the Church recognizes that her teachings are not always perfect. The Church does not seek to exclude those who want to change it even when the church (ie, the people, but I’m sure you know the difference between speaking about the church and the Church?) disagrees with them. I would strongly recommend a lesson in Church history, particularly that of the US Catholic Church (Dorothy Day pissed a lot of folks off and she’s a saint!), before you continue to judge others and call them unethical just because you would prefer a nice little homogeneous home to practice what you want to practice and ignore the rest.
            Oh, and as far as Catholics not thinking gay people are the “devil” you’re right. However, the Church does teach that being gay is disordered and unnatural, as “acts of great depravity” (CCC 2357). As far as I’m concerned, the Church also considers me to be immoral and disordered as a divorcee (CCC 2385), so at least I am in good company. I’m sorry, you were saying the Church welcomes all? Seems like you guys are doing a pretty crappy job of being the Image of Jesus and all that!
            And on another note, there’s no way in hell I’m sending my kid to Catholic School. Problem solved!

          • Anonamom, you obviously have animosity toward the Catholic church so I’m glad you realize that sending your child to a Catholic school would be a huge mistake.

          • While she is an inspiration to those who seek to follow Christ, Dorothy Day is not a canonized saint, at least not yet. And yes, Catholics are free to think and speak whatever they wish. But call it teaching or dogma, the Catholic Church instructs the faithful on what acts are moral and what are not (i.e. sin). I understand that this concepts runs counter to prevalent modern day permissiveness. No one is perfect, no religion has the market cornered on “God’s love” and the God’s love is limitless for all, but the Church immerses itself in ethical issues of the day and issues its guidance based on a consistent thread of of morality that crosses generations. It’s not a social club, but an active presence in the daily lives of those around the world who chose to follow, which is something I really love about being a Catholic. It’s substantial.

            I wish the best for you and your family.

      • Background: Catholic school first grade-law school. I was one of those kids in divorce/lost a parent support group at my school and I recall it was very supportive. From my experience, bias against divorced people stopped at the parish-level and you probably aren’t going to encounter pre-Vatican II doctrinal rigidity. My friends and I are all reasonable (and pro-choice) liberals. What you will see is that your kid will be exposed to a lot of religious teachings as part of the school routine: daily prayer, weekly masses, religion classes, kids being prepared for sacraments, etc. My elementary school and high school had fewer course options and smaller facilities (no home ec, no football field, not as many APs) than the better funded public schools. My mom chose a catholic elementary school b/c it had before and after school care and she is a practicing catholic. I chose a catholic high school b/c of the small class size (introvert) and better academic reputation. Fell in love w/ my catholic college at first sight and went to a catholic law school b/c it was the best one I got into. You may need to attend a mass or two to get a sense of how open-minded the parish and school will be. I’m happy to answer any other questions that you may have but it’s been a long time since I was in elementary or high school.

    • What part of Baltimore are you going to be living in?

      • We’d be in the County. City is not an option because of the schools. Oldest anonachild and possibly youngest anonachild (who is in dual language but has expressed he would not like to continue with Spanish) will attend public schools, as does/would BF’s kids, and Baltimore County schools are excellent. I/We have not decided on a specific area, but I would love to live in the Towson area.

        • Towson is nice, I think you would like it.

          • Yeah, it’s a great area, and pretty diverse for County standards. Its also probably just about as suburb as I would like to go. I’m not sure what will win out though. We have pretty differing ideas as to what we want out of a community and out of a house in general. Should be interesting hashing it all out over the next few months.

    • Don’t subject your kid to catholic school. It isn’t just about those gays, etc. What if YOUR kid turns out to be gay?
      Also, you are putting an awful burden on your kid if you don’t believe in the catholic teachings but expect your kid to tow the line to stay in the good graces of the powers that be at school – it is forcing her to be a hypocrite at a young age. – a bad lesson.
      Put your money where your beliefs are. The Montessori school is likely affordable because they likely give financial aid based on income, as do most expensive private schools. Also consider NOT moving to Baltimore for BF and putting your kids first. Their childhood won’t last forever. And they will likely remain in your life longer that the BF will, just based on statistics.
      Written as a liberal, agnostic, lesbian subjected to 12 years catholic school by my very catholic parents. Just because I didn’t realize I was gay (thankfully) until at college (and I did NOT want to go to a catholic college, so i didn’t), and I thought the way I wanted to (agnostic before middle school age), not as I was taught, did not mean the experience wasn’t damaging on so many levels, despite being a top student.

  • Rave: Friday! Leaving early to head up north and see my momma! (and dad briefly, before he jets out for the weekend!)
    Rant: Feeling fat today. blergh. Guess that’ll teach me to shove high-calorie breakfast sandwiches in my face.

  • SouthwestDC

    Rant: tried UberPool this morning and it was kind of disappointing.
    Rave: Got up before sunrise and saved a bit of time by not taking metro so I got in to work nice and early.

    • Oooooh, can you share details? I have not tried this yet and am curious to see what your experience with it was. Thanks!

      • SouthwestDC

        Before I requested the UberPool the app indicated it would be a 2 minute wait. After I requested the UberPool it jumped up to 6 minutes, and the actual wait time was more like 10 which is really long for my location.
        The other rider got on before me, and was dropped off after me, so that part didn’t impact my ride. But it ended up costing me almost $11. When I’ve taken Uber to and from work by myself it was $12-13, so I only save a dollar or two money by riding with someone.
        My Metro commute takes twice as long as driving, but only costs $2.55 pre-tax, so this isn’t the viable alternative I’d hoped for.

  • Rant: The partner transitioning into this firm is not being very helpful and in fact, has been sort of rude and condescending. Also he’s been out a lot. I know that starting a new position is stressful and confusing, but I don’t appreciate hearing that I’m not doing a good job for him when I am doing the best I can with the information that he gives me. It is stressing me out because am not sure how many ways I need to tell him the same thing before he understands it. I think that my office manager is going to step in next week when he gets back, and see if she can figure it out. It helps to know I’m not the only one here experiencing this, but I’m starting to question whether or not this is the right place for me to be (I’ve been here just over a year and I’ve not been a job-hopper before so I worry about that as well). It has been a really rough year here, as I dealt with the transition of the team I work with now in January and it was pure hell — I had thought this guy would be easier to work with since there was just one of him. Not so!

    Rave: Maybe I have a date tonight? I say maybe because he canceled the last time due to illness. We’ll see if we actually go out tonight. If we do, I am very looking forward to it.

    Rave: Heading to see my friends tomorrow and John Cleese/Eric Idle on Sunday in Richmond. It will be nice to sort of de-stress for a day or so.

    • phl2dc

      I’m sorry about your job situation. Dealing with difficult people who don’t know or care that they’re being difficult is the worst. I hope it gets better after your office manager talks to him. I hope he realizes that he’s been unreasonable and that it was all a result of stress – though I know it’s not a real excuse to be a poohead. Good luck!!!

  • janie4

    Rant: Have to build six Ikea kitchen cabinets tonight.
    Rant – Have to go and order granite for the remodeled kitchen tomorrow. And be back by two to wait on an Ikea delivery for a piece I forgot to order.
    Rant: Long day yesterday, and today will be much longer.
    Rant/Rave: At least I got two cabinets built yesterday.
    Rant/Rave: I also exercised this morning, but haven’t been able to work out with my tiny little three pound weights, and probably won’t get a chance until tomorrow.

    • Accountering

      Yikes on the cabinet. If its in the budget, it may make sense to post a gig on CL asking for someone who has some experience assembling these things to come help assemble and install? I would put in the ad to please explain their experience assembling IKEA kitchen cabinets in their initial response. You will get a ton of responses, and can then decide if you want to contact someone.

    • Do you have someone to help you build the cabinets, or are you on your own?
      My recollection of building IKEA kitchen cabinets was that it wasn’t all that hard (especially after you’ve done the first one or two), but (IIRC) they were too heavy for one person to maneuver. (Unless that one person was a Big Strong Guy.)

    • Accountering

      I so empathize with all of your rants/raves! We did all of this, but had guys assemble the stuff. Good luck to you, and if you can get this stuff knocked out, all of those rants will be raves tomorrow! If at all possible, I would loop in someone to help assemble. Take some of this stuff off your place.
      As a wise woman once said “It’s not a problem if you can throw money at it to fix it”

    • houseintherear

      My 95 lb pocket mom and I assembled 12 Ikea cabinets in 1.5 hours back in 2009. It’s our proudest story. You can do it! Not so hard after the first one.

  • leftcoastsouthpaw

    Rave: My sister is coming to visit and I haven’t seen her since her wedding.
    Rant: Good friend of mine got laid off.
    Rave/Rant: Switching jobs to a startup, but I’ll be taking a big pay cut.

  • New baby kitty is entering adolescence already, sad. He’s sleeping less, and spending his awake time acting all wild and a little bitey. Spends a lot of time prancing sideways away from me, then pouncing back to try to disembowel my foot. We’ve been consistent about the bite training from day one, but he’s too full of kitten crazy for it to have an effect at the moment. It’s cute, but I don’t want one of the kids to lose an eye. Got tips for living with a miniature predator who is too uninhibited to know what’s prey and what’s not, and too energetic to care?

    • Adding a second kitten isn’t an option for you, correct?
      Do you have prey-type toys you can use to play with him — wands with dangling thingamajigs, etc.?

      • No, no second cat. Just don’t want another.
        Yes, we do the feather teaser and the jingle toy and the laser pointer. He loves beating up the kids’ stuffed animals. He likes the ball in a round track. But he would definitely benefit from more interaction. Weekdays are hard.

        • Yeah, kittens that age spend half their time wrestling and chasing each other. Maybe get him his own stuffed animal, put it on a string and drag it around or pounce it on him.

    • Have you trimmed their nails? Also lots of playing to try to make the kitten tired. Don’t forget to protect yourselves, maybe wearing jeans and slippers around the house. It’s a tough phase until their learn to differentiate!

      • Yes, the nails have been trimmed. But as he gets stronger and more active, it’s getting harder. The first couple times it was a breeze. Now he struggles. I’m going to try to put claw caps on him this weekend.

    • phl2dc

      How old is your kitty? I’m very confused about the ado stage; internet information varies. My little one has been very bitey lately, too.

  • Rant – people who can’t just say they are lawyers, they have to say they are “BigLaw.” Good just obnoxious.

    • If you’re referring to someone on the Friday question, it made me smile due to his/her current job (AA). I think they were going for humor…

      • That one, you’re probably right, but there are at least 2 others. It just reeks of either insecurity or self-congratulation. Probably both.

        • Agreed with dcd – and honestly, the reason I never dated lawyers.

          • Anonynon

            I tried dating lawyers and its IMPOSSIBLE. The most self-absorbed profession I have come across. Where are the teachers, yoga instructors, ect πŸ™‚

          • @Anonynon. Hey now…we’re not all bad. There are jerks, etc. in every profession. I think it depends on what type of lawyer you’re dating (like someone in Biglaw as mentioned in the original post, compared to someone who’s working for the gov’t, a smaller, firm, corporate work, etc).

          • Emmaleigh504

            nah, they all suck in their own way. my family is full of lawyers of all types and they all have suckage

          • I know lawyers who are awesome people. They are just few and far between πŸ˜‰

          • Anonynon – Did you date multiple lawyers, or just that one girl who was studying for the bar exam?

    • Accountering

      I don’t find this obnoxious in the least. Andie is a lawyer, but her job is very very different than if she worked in biglaw.

    • Emmaleigh504

      it’s a cult, they gotta use the cult words.

    • There’s a world of difference between BigLaw, federal agency lawyer that’s a subject matter expert, and your plain-vanilla contracts and estates attorney with her own small practice. It gives some insight as to their current station in life. I don’t see anything pretentious about it.

      • Oh. Um. The date I have tonight is with an attorney.

      • In this context, agree to disagree. This wasn’t a question about station in life, it was a question about a first job. Including BigLaw in the response is just unnecessary and braggadocious. Don’t even get me started on usernames that include Biglaw . . .

        • hammers

          did you have a bad experience with someone in BigLaw?

          • Innumerable ones, but that’s beside the point. I am sensitive to this because I have been in BigLaw for 18 years, and hate to see the negative opinions of lawyers in general, and those in large firms in particular, reinforced by people who just can’t help but mention (unnecessarily) that they are in BigLaw (and then pause so you can genuflect).

          • dcd– I can only hope to work at a firm filled with people who share your outlook. I plan to do BigLaw but can’t stand the people in my class who call it that/emphasize it in that way and act like that’s the only “real” way to be a lawyer.

  • Rave: Flying out today! Just need to combat my usual flying nerves. The flight is too short for Xanax. Thankfully it’s non stop from National so that alleviates some of the stress.
    Rant/Rave Talking to my sis about some the schools she’s visiting on her tour. She’s performing throughout Ohio/Kentucky in an educational play about the importance of protecting the environment. While her experience has been mostly positive, the insights on some of the schools she’s visiting is disheartening. They had to edit all references to evolution out of the play for the school she visited yesterday. And other references. How can schools promote flat out lies to kids? I mean, I’m no pollyanna, but it horrifies me how bad the school systems across the country can be. Thankful I attended a good school that didn’t censor or whitewash learning.

  • Rave – How amazing the weather has been recently.
    Rant – One side of my back really hurts and I don’t know why. I haven’t done anything new or different. Feels like a really sore muscle.

    • Try a heating pad and see if that helps. I’ve been waking up with a sore back and I plug mine in while I’m half awake; it helps me sleep for a bit longer after it warms up.

  • Rant: Friend (the one with major anxiety/depression that was on the West Coast) attempted again. Or at least she called her mom screaming about attempting again and the cops found her on a bridge.
    Rant: Her mom went to work instead of going to the hospital to be with her. Friend refused inpatient care and was fired from her therapist.
    Rant: Cannot figure out (1) how to get her parents to act in their daughter’s best interest and (2) how to get her in inpatient care.

    Rave: It’s our fifth wedding anniversary and my husband is so supportive and loving to not just me but our friends and family.

    • Accountering

      This is unbelievably sad. Her parents are only going to finally wake up when she actually completes it. So sorry that you are in this situation, and hope you are able to figure out the best way to help your friend.

    • Can’t she be involuntarily committed if she is proving to be a danger to herself? I’d think being found on a bridge screaming about suicide by the police is being a danger to herself? So sad.

      • That’s where we’re at now. Looking into the legality of it all. It seems that in NJ she can be involuntarily committed by family AND lay adults but it takes a legal proceeding. So contacting a family friend who is a lawyer to see what that takes.
        Also contemplating getting all this info lined up and then taking it to her parents with the weight of all of her friends who love her dearly behind us to force them to action.

        • Best of luck. It is so difficult to try to help someone who is so resistant to it. I hope that you are able to get through to her and her family.

          • On the subject of with a challenging mental disorder…. I’m pretty sure my wife has somatic symptom disorder. She says she feels unwell and has problems with cognitive functioning, but none of this is apparent to me, or friends/family, or anyone she’s worked with. She does have problems with her eyes which make her feel more anxious about her health. She’s spent tens of thousands of dollars on doctors and treatments and supplements. She’s gone to doctors all over the region and even other parts of the country– they are always alternative doctors because the conventional ones tell her she’s fine. She’s gotten tested for everything imaginable, and not every test comes back perfect, but none of them point to a clear condition. The alternative medicine community has all kinds of theories, none of which are consistent except that they all say she has a very complex and serious problem that will require a lot of money to fix.
            She hasn’t been working for months. Just going to doctors and getting treatments but not feeling any better. Her boss is begging her to come back and I don’t know how to help her. She says she feels so sick that she can’t function, and it’s hard for me to argue with that because I’m not in her body.
            Any ideas?

          • Anon for This — That’s a tough situation, and I don’t think there’s a clear course of action to take.
            Can you get individual counseling on dealing with this issue?

          • Anon for This, I agree with Textdoc’s assessment and am so sorry you are both dealing with such challenges!
            I couldn’t help but note similarities between your wife’s case and a case discussed on the podcast Reply All recently. gimletmedia.com/episode/42-blindspot/ One of the resources they discuss in the podcast is a website called CrowdMed, which crowdsources medical diagnoses from doctors and medical researchers. I wonder if this might help your wife, too.

          • Wow, Shawess, that does sound like her. I’m going to listen to it right away! And CrowdMed sounds like a great resource too.

          • Also I would just urge you, if you can, to not assume that her condition is psychological or related to anxiety. The podcast talks about this a bit. I can add from my own personal experience — with a “medical mystery” that was less debilitating than the one you’re describing but unquestionably bad for my quality of life — that doctors rarely want to play “House” or have the chops to do so. Many are quick to say that the patient is just “anxious” because they don’t have better answers and they’re on the clock to see the next patient. But as a patient who knows that something is actually physically wrong, I think it’s natural to look for answers from other specialists until you find real answers. It’s expensive, time consuming, and incredibly frustrating, but there are no quick fixes until you find the right doctor and right diagnosis. I eventually did after years (!) and really hope you find the answers you’re looking for soon.

          • I know, and I’ve been trying to give her the benefit of the doubt. But this has been going on for at least five years, and she’s been to every specialist I can think of. When she’s not seeing doctors she’s reading about her symptoms and their possible causes online. I’ve done a lot of reading and research myself, and nothing seems to match up to a known medical condition or even a combination of conditions. But when I read about the symptoms of somatic symptom disorder, she has every single one. It’s hard to ignore that.

          • There is always the possibility that there is a psychological component, and possibly a big one, so I shouldn’t say that somatic symptom disorder should be taken off the table. It’s an absolute possibility. But in my case, from the first time I had my issue until the time I got a firm diagnosis was about 7 years. And weirdly, I got my diagnosis by accident, when trying to treat a different problem, after seeing countless MDs and alternative practitioners who could tell me basically nothing useful. I’ve heard stories of other diagnoses taking even longer!
            That said, I know this is extremely hard on you (and your finances). I can tell you want the best for your wife and it’s so hard to feel helpless in these situations. I don’t have any great advice there, except that I think Textdoc’s advice is good. You might benefit from getting support on how to best support your wife.

    • I am so sorry that your friend is going through this, UDPie.

  • Rant: Neighborhood cat that wants to move into my house, annoying my cats and making it a pain to leave the door open (locked gate) for the breeze.
    Rant: trying to eat toast and jam without getting butter and strawberries on my keyboard.
    Rave: I do love teleworking, despite the cats ‘n’ jamming.

  • New resident of popville born yesterday motioning! My daughter was so excited to meet her baby brother last night, it was really sweet and adorable.

  • Emmaleigh504

    Rant: Just looked in the mirror and my makeup is some how making me look more tired instead of less tired. wtf

  • Big rave: Gary dog is on the mend and back to being his normal cute, entertaining self.
    Rave: A friend is visiting this weekend. Excited to show her around my new city!
    Rant: I am legitimately huge. As in, I look like I could give birth any day now and still have a long way to go.
    This makes basic life tasks really tough. My hips and back hurt a lot after sitting for more than 20 minutes. Or walking for more than 20 minutes. Or basically doing anything for 20 minutes. I’m getting a referral for a PT and hope they can help.
    Rave: The aches and pains usually ease up a lot on the weekend. I’m so excited for yoga tomorrow morning. And for doing fun city meandering!

    • Every time you talk about the twins I smile big smiles. I am so happy for you!!

      • Aww thanks! You’re reminding me that I wanted to share a story from an acquaintance of mine named Kelly who is an identical twin. When she found out we were expecting ID twins, Kelly had a lot of good advice for us. Things like always have two birthday cakes and two birthday party themes (at one party even!). And COLOR CODE. She had an awesome color coding story. Her color coded color was Kelly green. Her sister, who I’ll call Kathy, always wore a certain shade of blue. Kathy was apparently super bummed out to learn, in her late teens, that “Kathy blue” wasn’t actually a real color like Kelly green is πŸ™‚ And I can see why!

        • As an identical twin I stress the importance of Color coding! I was pink and red, my sister blue and greens. To this day I still wear those colors primarily! On a personal note reminding people to make the effort to tell your twins apart. We may look alike, but we have distinct personalities! For most of my youth I was always “twin” not SKJ84. People don’t realize how annoying it is to be referred to as a unit not a person. Oh, and it’s cute to dress twins alike as babies, but not as cute when they get bigger.

          • This is really helpful! And I absolutely agree that it’s important to make sure that the girls are treated as individuals from the beginning. We’re not doing the matching outfit thing except on certain specific occasions.
            Out of curiosity, did your sister ever resent being dressed in colors that were less “girly” than yours? I’m thinking a lot about what colors I would choose and don’t want either girl to feel like she’s getting the short end of the stick.

          • Current thinking is that one twin will have peachy-pink colors and the other will have grey-purple-blue colors. I like this in theory but also expect to ask every single day if they are a boy and a girl.

          • hammers

            one little green girl and one yellow girl?

          • Hammers, I’ve shied away from those colors because they look terrible on me. But if the girls have their dad’s coloring, this could be perfect!

          • I like the green/yellow idea!

          • Emmaleigh504

            growing up not a twin I always seemed to get the blue clothes and my sister pink. I only got the pink as hand-me-downs. I don’t remember feeling like I was losing out on the girlie colors b/c they were usually pale blue, so girlie enough.

        • I thought of you last night – there were identical triplets born in Baltimore recently. Mom and dad said they are using color coded bracelets and anklets to tell them apart. Perhaps this is a good compromise to color coded clothing?

        • I don’t think she did. The reason I was pink was because I would pluck out my hair to amuse myself! My mom wanted people to know I was a girl.
          Have you joined mothers of twins? My mom was a member when we were little and it was a great resource.

          • oh, also she kept our hospital bracelets on until they didn’t fit anymore.

          • I like it! Yeah, I’m warming up to pink these days. I never thought I would dress a daughter in a lot of pink but it’s surprisingly difficult to find affordable baby clothes in the full range of colors. And pink is cute!
            I totally joined my local parents of multiples group — it’s awesome!

  • Rave: that gorgeous car and its license plate.
    Rave: this weather.
    Rave: Friday!

  • Rant: Exhausted from volunteering last night but
    Rave: the outdoor event was beautiful and a huge success.

  • Rave/Rant: last day at my job. It’s been the best office I’ve worked in, so a bit sad to be leaving. Staying in the same agency at least.
    Rave/rant: Leaving DC, and moving to the Bay Area on Sunday. I’ve been here 6.5 years, and time has flown by. I will definitely miss this place. I would be quite hapy to stay here long term, but I have this never ending urge to return to the west coast (probably due to family and spending the vast majority of my life there).

  • Emmaleigh504

    Book club: if you signed up for book club and didn’t get an email today, please email me again. thanks!

    • Emmaleigh504

      and I fail at email. trying again

    • Sorry, I haven’t been on in a couple of weeks….what’s this about a book club? Or, who do I email to get involved?

      • Emmaleigh504

        right now the book club is full, but if you gmail me at Emmaleigh504 I will put you on the list if someone drops out. It’s a “light” fiction book club, easy reads.
        For those who want to follow along at home, we are reading Zeroes by Scott Westerfeld.

  • Rave: I dragged my butt to the gym for the first time in six weeks. Can I get a gold star and go home to take a nap now?
    Rant: Trying to name the future kid. I have offered about 3o+ name ideas to my partner, and none of them have passed muster. I’m going on strike.
    Rave: Unscheduled weekend ahead. Time to rest AND get some domestic chores done.

    • If it makes you feel any better, one of my friends had the most terrible fights with her husband over baby names and ended up choosing the most fantastic name in the end. It’s probably my favorite baby name of all of my friends’ baby names (and I like all of the other baby names a lot too).
      Also, you’re my hero for making it to the gym at all. I’d give you a gold star and permission for a nap!

    • Emmaleigh504

      I will happily name your kid for your two: John Hebert Melancon (nickname Jack) or Margaret Hebert Melancon (nickname Daisy),

    • Has your partner thrown any possibilities into the mix?

      • None! Which is why I am currently on strike. πŸ™‚

        We do have time — kid isn’t due until the spring, but I’m a planner. So it is hard for me to sit on it.

    • justinbc

      I vote Maximus or Josephine

  • Rant: Forgot to bring lunch to work.
    Rave: It’s Friday!

  • Anonynon

    Rave: Trying to break some bad habits I have formed over the past few months. It feels good being able to resist them.
    Rave: Got an email about a new job opportunity…definitely lifted my spirits a bit. I have been contacted by this firm before and phone/F2F interviewed so I’m not getting my hopes up. But this seems like a perfect fit. Ugh just hire me dammit. I have a ton of references and contacts with the company…
    Rant: No plans for the weekend. I am getting horrible at planning things to do over the weekend. Any suggestions?

  • justinbc

    Rave: Inspection fully passed, everything is legal. Can finally start compiling some before and after photos for submission.

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