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Random Reader Rant and/or Revel

by Prince Of Petworth March 30, 2017 at 9:15 am 129 Comments

dc_neighborhood_news
Photo by PoPville flickr user Mark Andre

You can talk about whatever is on your mind – quality of life issues, a beautiful tree you spotted, scuttlebutt, or any random questions/thoughts you may have. But please no personal attacks and no need to correct people’s grammar. This is a place to vent and/or celebrate things about daily life in DC.

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  • textdoc

    FYI for Topscallop, MJinNE, and anyone else interested in the career counselor subthread that I was having trouble finding: I finally found it. See:
    https://www.popville.com/2017/03/random-reader-rant-andor-revel-1789/#comment-1258518

    • mtpresident

      What search terms finally did it?

      • textdoc

        It was Google-proof — apparently Google’s bots hadn’t yet crawled that RRRR, or hadn’t crawled it thoroughly enough, so it was unfindable via simple googling.
        .
        I had to go through a bunch of consecutive RRRRs manually, searching for the last name (Cardy) of the career counselor Bizzinger recommended.

        • mtpresident

          Yikes. You were very determined!

        • MJinNE

          You are amazing. Thank you for all the effort!

    • topscallop

      Thanks textdoc! You are wise and skillful in the ways of subthread research, and you use your powers for good.

      Related rave: had a job interview last week
      Rant: tough to say how it went, and I’m ambivalent about staying in this field, but the idea of starting with a new team and focusing on something more tangible than my current area of focus is exciting.
      Rave: at least the interview was good practice, and reminded me to have a response prepared for the moment someone turns to me and asks a follow-up question in French…should have anticipated that, and practiced!

  • Hookdntx

    Rant: My introverted side hit full panic mode looking at my calendar and realizing that every weekend between now and memorial day is booked up.
    Rave: I have lots of things to do?
    Rave: The pup I ran with this past weekend for PACK with the Humane Alliance was adopted!

    • iwannarunwithdogs

      wait, wait, wait. is this a thing? can you just sign up to run with dogs?

      • FridayGirl

        I wanted to do this but I don’t run. I’ve always wondered, is it possible to walk with the dogs? I believe there’s an application process and small fee for Humane Rescue Alliance volunteers, too. (Hookdntx please correct me if I’m way off about this! I’m also

      • You have to go through volunteer orientation/training but yes, every Saturday morning you can run with shelter dogs through PACK

        http://www.humanerescuealliance.org/volunteer

      • Pixie

        Do it! I loved PACK. One of the many things I miss about living in DC. I never thought I’d be able to wake up early on Saturday mornings to exercise, but man, those pups are awesome.

        FridayGirl – you don’t have to run. If you sign up as a walker, they pair with you a less energetic dog, or a dog recovering from surgery or a dog who is on meds that can’t run. There is a small volunteer fee (not sure how much it is now, but when I did it was like 15 bucks?) and you have to go through a training process before you can take the pups out on your own.

        • FridayGirl

          Thank you!

      • LittleBluePenguin

        Oh my gosh you guys! Thanks for this info! I don’t run either, but I’d love to get my doggie fix by walking some pups! And maybe this would be the motivation I need to start my Saturdays off earlier and with a bang!

    • Hookdntx

      Yes, there is a small admin fee for volunteer registration
      You don’t have to be a runner
      You do have to go through training, its a bit time consuming but the end is you get to run/walk with shelter pups!
      I tried posting the link but it got stripped out, its with the Humane Alliance rescue (that’s the group I am with)
      It is also a great way to get a bigger dog fix, if you are like me and have a small guy but long to have a canine running partner, but not the space for one

    • AMDCer

      As a fellow introvert, I feel your pain (or at least your anxiety!)

  • FridayGirl

    Rant: Overslept. I think I must have forgotten to re-set my alarm after my schedule briefly changed yesterday, and so I booked it to work this morning and managed to only be a little late.
    .
    Rant: Having a hard time grasping new duties at work. The training was a bit haphazard (not the fault of the person who trained me, but more the office as a whole for poor planning) and even though I keep asking questions I feel like the people who already work on this are so used to it they can’t explain it well. It’s making work more frustrating than I was used to. I have to keep telling myself “FridayGirl, you’re not stupid.”
    .
    Rave/Rant: So close to the weekend….. and I *might* have a date next week. I almost had one this weekend but the guy spent about 5 minutes telling me how he liked drinking before asking me out for drinks. So, no. Kind of disappointing, kind of not.

  • BookaholicAnonymous

    Rant: People who park in “no rush hour parking” spaces (like on Connecticut or 16th). I’m not usually a destructive person, but forget ticketing and towing: some mornings I just wish a snowplow would come down the street and push them all off to the side.
    Neither rant nor rave: when your SO has kids, the process of getting to know the kids can feel a lot like the early stages of dating, with all its attendant insecurities and questions. Do they like me? Is this going well? Am I screwing up?
    Revel: one of the kids made a big–and quite lovely–inclusionary gesture toward me last night, and today I’m grinning from ear to ear.

    • mtpresident

      Love your revel. That’s awesome. How old are the kids? I think the more you can meet them at their level and engage with them in their set of interests, the better but others with more experience in this arena may have better/more specific advice.

    • FridayGirl

      Re your rant: I had the same thought the other day. “Wouldn’t it be great if these buses had plows on them and could just run right into these cars like those big ice-breaking ships?!”

    • Anonamom

      I completely and totally understand what you mean in regards to dating someone with kids. It’s very difficult to navigate. But just be yourself and the kids will come round. We are actually navigating a situation right now where my SO’s son’s mother is dating again and once again it’s Mr Wonderful. He’s one of those that tries to buy kids love too, which makes it even worse. If they get married, it will be stepdad #3. It’s like watching a train wreck about to happen.

  • blues

    Rave: Day 2 back at the gym after too much time away. Feels good.
    *
    Rave: Great dinner with old boss last night. Really glad we’re continuing a relationship after I left.
    *
    Rant: The continuing dissolution of the old organization. More and more people leaving, including the lifers.

  • Rave: School lottery results coming out.
    Rant: Most likely have merely gotten my hopes up for the preferred school placement.
    Rant: Work has gotten…weird. A new department head has started, and some people are not reacting well. Morale overall is quite low, and it is continually weighing on my mind.
    Rave: Taking the day off tomorrow to go on a daycare field trip with the kiddo and her class.

    • Do you know when the lottery results are announced – tonight, tomorrow morning?

      • mtpresident

        Likely late tonight sometime–after 10pm or so? Possibly later. I can’t remember what time we learned last year. So glad to not need to worry about it this year… good luck!

      • I heard 11pm tonight, but I haven’t seen anything official. They only guarantee that they will be up tomorrow. For the sake of my anxiety, I am hoping it is earlier rather than later.

  • 13thStreetResident

    Any word on the heavy police presence on U Street last night (between 9th and 11th NW), around 8:30pm? It seems that MPD was investigating a car wreck on U Street. MPD also had a heavy presence at 11th and Florida NW.

    • On twitter I was told either a cyclist was hit by a car and/or there was a presidential motorcade passing.

      • FridayGirl

        Hahahaha…. those are very different things.

        • But in #thistown :)

        • Jay

          and yet somehow, it’s easy to imagine them both being true, simultaneously…

  • joe_baggadonuts

    Rave: It’s Thursday….which means tomorrow is Friday.

    Side note: Anyone know where I can buy Cheerwine? Preferably in the District, but I’m willing to venture out if necessary.

    • Anon Spock

      Virtually (probably all) food stuffs have a find feature on their site. I did the work for you, and there doesn’t appear to be any regular stores selling it in md or va and nothing listed in DC. But…you’re in luck, you can buy it directly from cheerwine through their site.

    • 1301

      I’ve seen it at Wiseguy’s Pizza (4th and Mass, NW), weirdly enough. New York pizza, Georgia soda. Not sure you can buy it in bulk, though, just by the bottle.

    • eater

      I have found it at World Market stores before! You could try the one that is built into the BB&B in Chinatown, that’s where I bought it.

    • Anon Spock

      A few food trucks sell it as well. Dirty south deli and puddin usually have it.

    • Jst

      The DC Empanadas Truck has Cheerwine, you may want to check their location inside Union Market, they may have it there as well.

    • Emmaleigh504

      The have it at the Ace Hardware store in Woodley Park.

  • hiphopanonymous

    Rave: I had the strangest dream this morning, in which I was at a tattoo parlor and the artist was refusing to give me the tattoo I wanted! I argued with him forever, changed the location, changed the design idea, but nothing. I’m thinking this is a sign, but I’m not sure if it’s in favor of another tattoo, or against! (Note: I want more!) Also, in dream, I had my ex b/f’s really ugly tattoo on my arm, and the artist DID offer to fix it…
    Rant: Cannot. Stop. Eating.
    Rave: Had a beautiful run last evening! It almost killed me, but was worth every minute of being outside. Excited to run again tonight.
    Random: Thinking about putting a hold on my gym membership and just being oustide before the weather gets too hot.

  • skj84

    Rave: I got a ticket to Gloria Gaynor live at The Library of Congress!!!! I’m going to rock my disco finest. Tickets sold out within seconds.
    Rant: I only got one ticket. I know of at least one other person who is going, but I wish I could bring my Aunt aka disco queen back in the day.
    Rant: I smushed my foot in lyra class last night. It doesn’t really hurt anymore, but it is stiff.

    • wdc

      Is Gloria Gaynor still alive? And performing??

      • skj84

        Yup! The concert is to celebrate “I will survive” being selected for preservation in the National Recording Registry. Gloria Gaynor will lead a symposium on disco earlier in the day, then perform in the concert later in the evening. I am so hyped. I love disco. Like really really love it. The history of the genre facinates me. There are other events leading up to the concert, but they are all also sold out. Tim Gunn is doing a lecture on 70’s fashion, and they are screening Saturday Night Fever.

        • TX2DC

          That is really cool. The past few years, I’ve made it my mission to catch legendary performers that are likely near the end of their performing career. Seeing Loretta Lynn was a highlight, as was Diana Ross. I would have jumped at the opportunity to see Gloria had I known it was possible. Enjoy!

        • AMDCer

          Apparently “Somewhere Over the Rainbow” is also going into the registry – I was really surprised to learn that it wasn’t already in it!

      • aDrOC

        Well apparently Gloria Gaynor did indeed survive, hey-hey.

    • MPinDC

      I saw an announcement about Gloria Gaynor at the LOC – what a fun event!
      I’ll be out of town so I didn’t even try for tickets (but probably would have missed out anyway)

      • Apparently it sold out in 1 minute!!

        • skj84

          yup! I was surprised how fast it was. I couldn’t get the page to load on my laptop, but was able to get through with the Eventbrite app. The LOC will update the page when people give their tickets up.

    • Anon

      If it is in the usual LOC concert schedule, I always manage to get tickets they give away last minute – people don’t show up because the tickets are free, they just get them and don’t use them. I do always get in line for an unused ticket a hour or so before the show – whenever they say the line starts. Sometimes someone will give me a ticket when waking in if one of their party couldn’t make it.

    • dcd

      As an aside, I like the song, and the artist. However, I will never, ever understand the fascination with playing I Will Survive at weddings. It is basically the anti-wedding, anti-“I am so happy to be spending the rest of my life with you” song. It’s the only song I banned from my wedding reception. I didn’t even back down when one of the drunk bridesmaids, who has previously spend 10 minutes bawling because of whothehellknowswhy, demanded that I lift the restriction.

      • skj84

        Its like using “Every Breath You Take” as your wedding song. Not appropriate!!

  • Anonamom

    Rave: Finally went to the dermatologist and was officially diagnosed with rosacea. The good news is, it’s treatable and since I’m so ‘young’ (ha!) it apparently I should see significant improvement. Also, getting on top of it now as opposed to later should prevent the worst side effects of broken capillaries and stuff like that.
    Rant: The bad news came when I went to the pharmacy and the medications combine cost over $900. I was given a “loyalty card” from the drug manufacturer for one which brought that one down to a palatable rate, but the second is nearly $600 with insurance, as well as with the types of discounts they give you without insurance (it is often cheaper to do these than go through insurance). I have of course decided that it’s not worth it. I have major issues with my skin, I hate being the woman who *has* to wear make up to leave the house for many reasons, and it really does screw with my self-image and confidence in ways I hate to admit, but I think now it’s time to learn to live with it.

    • mtpresident

      Are there generics available? Or lower-cost brand that’s been around longer? The loyalty card is often sort of a scam to encourage people to use brands rather than generics, so that’s what makes me wonder. Also–check your insurance options for the next time open season comes around. Perhaps you’d have better coverage with another plan. While you might be right that it’s just not worth it, treatment may be less expensive after some research.

      • Anonamom

        Unfortunately, the one with the card is not available as a generic yet, and the one that is super expensive is the generic. Unfortunately, I do not have any other options for insurance with my employer. They recently did away with PPO plans and now we can only have a High Deductible Plan. This may be a job changer for me to be honest.

        • mtpresident

          Well, shoot. I’m sorry to hear that.

          • mtpresident

            Just one more thought–if the generic is in its first 6 months or so of being on the market, then its price hasn’t come all the way down yet–maybe check when the generic went on the market and plan on re-checking the price if its entry was recent?

          • Anonamom

            Good thought, but nope, I just checked and it’s been in commercial, non-patented use since the 60s. I did see this on Wikipedia just now: “The wholesale cost in the developing world is between 0.01 and 0.04 USD per pill. In the United States 10 days of treatment is about 14 USD, however some in 2014 were selling it for more than 3.00 to 10.00 USD per pill.” So this really is just a case where the drug companies are making a crap ton of money because, well, ‘MURica. Also, I just did the math and I would be spending $18.80 per pill for this medicine.

          • mtpresident

            Ugh, I’m sorry. Ages ago a grad school friend suggested that perhaps we should reorient R&D for drugs so that much of it is done in academic settings–and then schools could sell/license/whatever the useful drugs to drug companies to manufacture on a large scale, market, and sell. I thought he was crazy at the time, but it really may not be a bad idea. It would certainly re-orient drug research and take that out of rationale for inflated prices.

        • dcd

          Do you routinely hit the deductible? If so, can you fill the prescription at that time? I know they won’t let you stock up, but maybe you could get some relief – though I don’t; know how long, or often, the drugs have to be taken to be effective.
          .
          Either way, that stinks.

        • HaileUnlikely

          I know you know the following and probably know the details better than I do, but be careful with the “job changer” based on current insurance offering. My employer used to have a great PPO plan but eliminated it this year in favor of a high deductible plan, and my wife’s employer is phasing out their PPO plan in favor of a high deductible plan next year. Also, I have no idea how you typically use your plan (no response needed, not my business), but in the event that you were likely to hit your out of pocket maximum within the year even without the prescription, you may as well just get it, as the cost would wash out anyway. (I realize that may not be even remotely applicable to your situation. I’ve never even hit my deductible, or even come close for that matter. On the other hand, I know people who I’m sure obliterate it every year – for somebody who is going to hit it anyway, might as well just get the prescription and let the cost wash out later.

      • Anon NS

        Agree re loyalty cards. Also when patent up, drug companies put a lot of effort into repackaging (as in, allegedly novel delivery mechanism) or slight tweak to formula that is supposedly “new and improved” but doesn’t actually work better – just lets them get under new patent. Then they aggressively market the “new and improved.” I’d check to see if there are other products that have been on the market longer. As your doctor about what studies indicate about advantages (if any) of newer product.

        • Anonamom

          The expensive one is not the one that I’m getting the card for. Though I completely agree with your assessment, and there are most certainly other treatments that may be cheaper and more effective, in this case, the cream came down to what I consider a reasonable price with the discount card. The medication that is insanely expensive is a generic, and it’s just that my insurance fucking sucks.

    • kanon

      Odd. I was diagnosed with rosacea years ago but perhaps not a bad case as I wasn’t given any creams or anything. Just a reminder to wear a daily sunscreen. I do use retin-a, though, I don’t entirely remember why at this point…it’s been a few years since I last saw a dermatologist, but my granny used to steal mine when I was a teenager to help with her wrinkles. I don’t have acne issues anymore but I do baby have wrinkles. Anyways, I don’t know how your rosacea affects you, but I dgaf. I have just accepted that I’ll always be rosy-cheeked. I also have a birthmark on my face which has caused some grief over the years. Anyways, whatever you decide to do re: expensive lotions or makeup, I hope you find peace with it.

      • Anonamom

        Every case will be different, and every person will be different. In my case, it is quite sever, and it is affecting me. I would LOVE to develop an IDGAF attitude towards it, but I have now experienced more than one occasion of someone pointing it out and making a comment. I have been made fun of by drunk girls in 7-11, I’ve had a co-worker ask me in front of other co-workers what’s wrong with my face because I didn’t have make-up on, that’s sort of thing. So yeah, it has affected me. I really hope I find my peace too, cause it really sucks, and on top of that I have a daughter with a chronic, medical skin condition that will also never fully get better, and I want to be able to lead by example for her.

        • skaballet

          This is terrible. So sorry to hear that – people suck.

          Have you looked into laser treatment? I know it’s not cheap, but I’m not sure that it would be any more expensive than the prescriptions you’ve been given. You may also try a pure vitamin c cream. I know that’s supposed to help roscea though takes a long time (like a year) to see results.

          Good luck!

        • kanon

          I’m sorry. Like I said, I have a birthmark on my face and people say the absolute rudest things about it. I have also been asked what is wrong with my face, or if I’ve been punched or one guy even asked if I needed him to help me beat up my bf, because he assumed I was a battered woman. But, it’s a birthmark and I’ve dealt with it all my life so I guess I just got used to it. Sometimes it will bother me for a day or two but for the most part I give a dirty look and tell people their question was inappropriate or rude (if it was). My dermatologist said I could get it removed and I said no, it’s a part of me. But yeah, people are total jerks and that totally sucks and I feel for you and your daughter.

    • Formerly ParkViewRes

      Does your insurance not cover any of it? I cannot believe how much some prescriptions cost. I got a derm prescription up here and it was like $10 (with wife’s insurance), but even without insurance it’s only $100. Down in the US? It’s $900!

      • LittleBluePenguin

        agh! Stop taunting me with your delicious socialised medicine, Canada, gosh!

        • Formerly ParkViewRes

          The thing is prescriptions are not covered under OHIP (the socialized healthcare in Ontario)! So they’re either covered through a work plan, you buy your own plan, or you pay out of pocket. But even out of pocket it obviously blows the US prices out of the water. I think Bernie was trying to pass a low where Americans could get prescriptions from Canada?

        • Anonamom

          The cash price of the drug was something like $900? I am getting a discount through my insurance which brings it down to the near $600 price tag. It’s Insane!!

    • bll

      have you also thought about a change in diet? A family friend has rosacea and cutting alcohol really made a big difference. She’s a nurse, so I’m not sure if she’s also on some other scrips, but at the very least you could try a diet change before pursuing the expensive medications.

    • Anon

      Is one of the prescriptions Metrogel? I used it for awhile and it really seemed to help. I also don’t remember it being all that expensive, but maybe it’s because of your note below about having a high deductible plan.

    • DPC

      I have rosacea and along with the prescribed medication my dermatologist also recommended I used the cerave cream. It is over the counter and super cheap but creates a great barrier for the skin that is missing with rosacea. Highly recommend trying it!

    • AMDCer

      I just went through this myself a few weeks ago. I’ve had rosacea for years, fortunately not too severe, but after dealing with a flare up that just wouldn’t go away on its on (for a couple of years) I finally went to a dermatologist and she prescribed four items, and yes, all together it would have been about $900 (at CVS) and that was with discount cards for three of them! It’s absolutely insane. I called the dermatologist and they recommended I use Loudon Family Pharmacy. It did bring down the cost a bit (and I decided to forgo one of the topical creams for an unrelated issue), but it was still around $600. I also have a high deductible plan and an HSA (by choice), so I bit the bullet and went ahead and used my HSA funds. I’m glad I did as I have seen a huge improvement and my skin feels so much better. I’m fortunate that I am able to afford to make that decision – I don’t have kids and other expenses that I know you do! You may want to look at ZENMED – they have a line of products for Rosacea that aren’t as cheap as some of the drugstore suggestions, but definitely cheaper than the prescriptions! Good luck – I know how frustrating it can be.

    • Anonymous

      I have found that for prescriptions that are not covered by my insurance, Costco has significantly lower prices than CVS or Giant ($55 as compared with over $200). You might give them a call to see what it costs there. You don’t need to be a Costco member to fill prescriptions there (at least not at Pentagon City), but you do get an additional discount with a Costco membership.

  • wdc

    Rant: Just once I would like to tell my husband how tired and overwhelmed I am without him trying to one-up me on fatigue and overwork.
    Query: Monday evening around 6 the sidewalk in front Petworth Citizen was all police-taped off, for the whole block, with lots of cops standing around. No one looked particularly alarmed. What happened?

    • Andie302

      You may have to just tell him this outright. “Honey, I know you’re probably just as tired and overworked as I am, but I need some empathy right now and not a competitive reply. Here it goes…” and then unload. I say that as someone that has a wonderful partner that can be oblivious to my needs but very responsive when I communicate clearly. Hopefully you’d get the response you’re looking for if you ask for it! (Also, you can always use this forum – don’t know what you have going on, but we are here to commiserate/empathize/etc.)

      • wdc

        You’re sweet. :)
        It’s just the usual… full time job, kids, house, pets, an assortment of people needing care (I cook for a couple of elderly neighbors, and look out for a couple neighborhood kids.)
        I guess what bugs me is that he uses his work as an excuse not to participate in the daily home grind. As if I didn’t work too, or perhaps as if my work isn’t as important. And then it becomes a rhetorical cycle: if I have time to cook and clean and socialize, then I must not work as much as he does. He will not accept that my time management is just better than his, and that he has room for improvement on that front.

        • mtpresident

          That’s obnoxious and I’m sorry. I’m sometimes resentful that the nature of my spouse’s job means that she’s around for less of the daily grind on the kid front, but fortunately she doesn’t ever ever insinuate that I have less work or some such ridiculousness.

        • FridayGirl

          That would drive me absolutely insane. I feel for you, WDC.
          .
          (Side note: I do believe there is an entire field of research on “emotional labor” and these kinds of issues. I’ll see if I can dig any of it up in case you or anyone else is interested.)

          • FridayGirl

            Here’s a starter after a quick google search. I also a know a facebook friend of mine posted a giant google document of emotional labor resources/research awhile back but I can’t open google docs at work so I’m not going to be able to find that now. Perhaps others have seen it.

            thebodyisnotanapology.com/magazine/7-ways-men-must-learn-to-do-emotional-labor-in-their-relationships/

        • Anon NS

          I’m on the opposite side of this. I’m the dead weight spouse! I don’t want to be! My wife just has 10 times more energy than I do (really, than everyone). Honestly I try to keep up – we are both women, so it’s not like I have some “women’s work” delusion. And I’m always looking for ways to add value! But for all the years leading up to our relationship, I was ordering take out and sleeping late…while my wife was busy home canning from her garden, making amazing meals from scratch, and distance running at sub-7 pace well into her late 30s. And we didn’t become different people just we because married.
          Perhaps your hubby is feeling a little insecure about his relative lack of productivity/energy, so he is justifying that (perhaps subconsciously) by thinking he must just be working harder outside the home?

          • wdc

            Yeah, I’m like your wife. I don’t expect my husband to get up early for the farmer’s market and put up a dozen jars of pickles or anything. He’s never done stuff like that and I wouldn’t expect him to start just because I like doing it.
            We had a nearly 50-50 split on non-income-generating work up through the diapers phase. But in the last few years, as I’ve gotten busier with kids and career, he’s stopped doing it, almost completely. Yet still complains about how overworked he is.
            So the conversation goes like this:
            I’d like you to participate around the house more.
            What specifically do you want me to do?
            Unload the dishwasher before I get home from work. (He works from home much of the time.)
            I’ll try, but I’m really busy. My boss is blah blah, my team is blah blah, reports are due blah blah.
            (I unload the dishwasher when I get home.)
            To his credit, he doesn’t appear to be doing anything else, like watching basketball or playing world of warcraft. It’s not like he’s choosing personal pleasure over household responsibilities. He just sucks at balance, and won’t try to not suck.
            Aaaand no one likes a complainer. I’ll put a lid on it now.

          • Formerly ParkViewRes

            Okay, so unloading the dishwasher sucks and I hate doing it, but it takes 5 minutes, maybe 10. That would drive me nuts especially since he works from home. I feel bad sometimes because my wife will come home from work and still cook dinner. But I try to empty the dishwasher most of the time, do 80% of the laundry, and manage our finances. He should try and pick up the “quick win” chores like emptying the dishwasher, taking out the trash, etc.

          • Anonamom

            Have you tried not doing it? I tend to take over things if I see them not done, and EVERYONE (the kids, SO, my co-workers…) knows this. So if they don’t feel like it, they leave it knowing that eventually Anonamom will come along and do it. Maybe that’s what is going on?

          • Anon NS

            I LOLed at this, bc the dishwasher is literally my ONE THING. Every day, I’m like – no matter what, I MUST have the dishes done by the time my wife gets home. If I get nothing else accomplished, I have to get that done. (And make the bed.) Agree re: “quick win” chores. I will never match my spouse – she is truly remarkable and I’ve never met anyone like her. But I try to do these things that are like – look we both know I married up here but I’m aware I need to contribute “at my level.”

          • Anon NS

            Agree with the “not doing it” approach. To share from the other side of this – I have actually asked my wife to agree that some tasks are “mine” – meaning, she cannot do them, even if they are not done. She is just quicker to jump on things – but I’m not at all a slob. I will do them – it just may be the dishes an hour after she would or the laundry a day after she would. I don’t want her to do everything, and I also don’t want to feel like I’m competing to “get there first.” This has, however, only had limited success bc my wife can’t help herself. E.g., ran the dishwasher last night, and my wife decided to unload the dishwasher at 6 am this morning before I got up. It’s not a passive-aggressive thing – she is just a busy bee.

        • Anonamom

          I’m sorry, wdc. This sounds like a really difficult position to be in. It must feel very demeaning and disrespectful to have him think your work (all of it – paid and unpaid).
          We deal with similar issues a lot. What I do is just say, hey, I know you’ve had a ling frustrating day, but so have I, and I need to decompress too. We also both have gotten into the habit of being honest about when we have hit our max adulting point for the day, and can both say “tag, you’re it” if we need too. When it comes to the kids and the dogs, we share in the work and the frustrations. The one sticking point is the housework because he has a different level of clean (think OCD) than I do. At first, he would complain that I never cleaned and one day I just broke it down to him that I do clean, every single effing day, but no, I’m not going to get on my hands and knees every Saturday morning and clean baseboards and grout with a tooth brush after working 40+ hours a week, commuting, mothering, and all that crap. The key was communicating that to him and making him aware how crappy it made me feel when he expected more of me.

        • AMDCer

          It sounds like part of the problem may be that since he works from home he doesn’t have that natural switch from “work work” to “home work” that someone who works outside of the home has. I’ve heard it can be hard to “turn off” when you don’t physically ever leave the environment in which you do your job. It sounds like he needs a “hard stop” time at some point at the end of the day.

          • wdc

            Maybe that. But mostly, I suspect, what Anonamom points out above: that I will do it if no one else does. So why should anyone else bother?

        • anon

          Many couples solve this problem by hiring a house cleaner. Yes, it costs a bit, but it sounds like it would be so worth it in such a relationship. A few hours of paid cleaning for the tougher chores, even if only once every other week, though weekly is better, would a great help. I’ve never done it, I’ve just heard from friends.
          .
          Or, you could do like my mother did, and get those kids into major housecleaning tasks early on. Mine started with all dishes and nightly cleaning up of the kitchen, including the stovetop and sweeping the kitchen floors, and regularly cleaning the bathrooms, then vaccuuming and dust moping floors where needed, to doing laundry for a large family for hours every Saturday by the age of 10 or so. Kids have boundless energy.
          .
          Though, for best child development, I recommend keeping their chores somewhat light in hours and paying a cleaner if you can – I felt like a domestic worker for years, until I began working 20-30 hours a week after school and full-time in summers when I was 16 – then I finally got a reprieve from housework. Which is probably why I’m now a slob when I live alone.

  • LittleBluePenguin

    Rave: I’m in a really weirdly good mood today (*knock wood and hopes I didn’t just jinx myself!*)
    Rant: woke up a half-hour before I actually had to get up because I had to pee. Grrr!
    Rave: But at least I went to bed at 9:45 so I don’t feel exhausted.

    • LittleBluePenguin

      Oh, also, Thanks to all who gave me suggestions for good eatin’ places, I’m going to compile things tonight and send it to my little bro…Any other suggestions for gourmet restaurants and/or ones you particularly love are still welcome!

      • I just had dinner at Iron Gate the other night for the first time. You mentioned your brother likes seafood and their smoked cod bruschetta was amazing! As was the feta stuffed squid, beet salad, etc. etc.

      • That One Guy

        With regard to yesterday’s post I would suggest you look at Makoto. It has a nice progression to the meal and only one or two raw sushi dishes.
        .
        I also enjoyed Fiola Mare. It’s probably even better atmosphere wise when the weather warms up and they open the space up.

  • Andie302

    Rave: Stopped at Macy’s last night on a whim and picked up a dress for a wedding next weekend. It’s cute, it’ll travel well, I was pleased with the price, and I already know another occasion or two with different social circles where I can use it. win/win/win/win
    Rave: In a great mood today too! Lots going on in the next 24 hours (real estate closing, dinner with a friend, African American history museum finally, getting house ready to be rented this weekend) but looking forward to most of it.
    Rant: After raving/ranting here about the 10-miler this weekend, we are going to have to skip it
    Biggest rant: because a friend from home lost her father to Alzheimer’s the night before last and I’ll be heading to the viewing Sunday and service Monday. He had a hard battle, but it’s still so unbelievable that such a vibrant person is gone. Just so sad for their family

  • That One Guy

    ?: I may have stepped on a landmine, on my own volition, by volunteering to help friend try and get herself in a better place. I don’t want to be fully engulfed into her vortex.
    Rant: Granted I’m not using my full imagination, but I can’t think of many things worse than walking down the aisle of a grocery store and being hit by the smell of poop. First time, I chalked it up to gas and held my breath, but the next time the guy passed by…*shudder*. I’ll give someone obese a pass in case there are physical issues of cleaning yourself after the deed, but this guy had no excuse, especially since he was with his wife/girl friend. Yuck. PSA friend don’t let friend do themselves dirty like that. Haha.
    Rave: Found the GW dining space that has GRK, Chick-Fil-A, and Sol! Thankfully they weren’t open for breakfast.

    • FridayGirl

      Re your rave: My office found that a couple weeks ago! They also have Wiseguys pizza. Yasssss.

  • kanon

    (Belated) rant: ACC performance in the NCAA tourney.
    Rave: but Nats opening day in 4 days.
    Rave: tickets to opening day in 4 days.
    Rave: Nats giving away magic 8 balls on opening day.
    Question: how early should I get to the game to get one of the 20k magic 8 balls? Gametime @ 1:05

    • Cleveland Park runner

      Sometime after me so I can get mine first. ;) I jest, I jest. Noon is *probably* fine, though maybe hedge on the side of 11:30 since it’s opening day.
      .
      Who are you speculating will throw first pitch now that our president is out?

      • That’s a great question! hahaha what if it was Obama :)

        • Andie302

          That’s what I said! I would LOVE it! He would get a standing ovation!

          • It would be epic!!

          • Cleveland Park runner

            Our current president would definitely get booed, and I bet that’s why he turned it down. Fine by me.
            .
            I’m hoping it’ll be Pudge (Ivan Rodriguez), who was chosen for the hall of fame just a couple of months ago. He’s not going in as a Nat, but he did play 2 seasons here. And, fun fact: he caught for Strasburg’s major-league debut! Wouldn’t that be fun?!

          • kanon

            In all honesty, I was horrified when I heard it might be Trump but then I was a disappointed when he declined because I would have loved to loudly boo our President.

        • skj84

          What would be even more epic is if they choose Hilary.

          • kanon

            OMG yes!!!!!!!!!!

  • MadMax

    Anyone ever shipped flowers to APO / military base to people deployed before? What vendor / website did you use? Struggling to find something that isn’t super scammy looking.

    • anonymous

      Most bases have flower shops even if at small scale on them. I’d research to if that base in particular have one.

    • Andie302

      Hmm…maybe look for a separate vendor that ships quickly to APO’s? I haven’t had personal experience with one of these, but on my deployment one of the guy’s mom’s shipped him a sub overnight from Hoagie Haven, so I know it’s possible (and that Hoagie Haven wasn’t responsible lol)

      • FridayGirl

        That’s amazing.

    • MadMax

      Apparently Kremps (based out of Philly) does APO delivery, if anyone else has this question in the future.

  • Revel: survived the bike ride home yesterday. Almost 14 miles in a day is a lot for a beginner and there were a few hills I just had to walk up.
    Revel: treated myself to super tacos last night
    Revel: new kid in my class is fitting in perfectly!

  • Rave: I have identified two of the next things I want to work for self improvement
    Rant: they are bumping up against my introverted, stubbornly independent nature and I just don’t want toooooo
    Rave: in less of a funky mood today than as of late
    Rant: I wish my parents would nail some plans down when they come to town. I feel like I have to clear my entire calendar just in case we actually decide to leave my sister’s house and do something

    • thismoi

      How did you identify these steps toward self-improvement?? Just through a process of self-reflection? Asking as a stubbornly independent introvert who could stand to make some strides in the self-improvement direction.

      • That’s a really good question. A lot of it is self reflection and over thinking every situation, outcome, and reason to death. I’m somewhat obsessed with social science research and thinking about upstream causes to things, so this comes naturally to me. I have constant “churn” thinking about what motivated people to do things, what my potential responses could be, etc (I feel like this is common, but sometimes I also feel like the volume of churn I have is SO HIGH).
        Partly it’s also that I’m so close to that next step that it has become obvious. One of these things is that I need to build some strategic relationships at work. These aren’t going to happen through meetings or other day to day stuff I do, so it is going to require me engaging them for the purpose of networking. This is what my nightmares are made of.
        The other thing is more personal and that was through reflection and thinking about how I can change some things to make relationships more favorable for me.
        I hope this is helpful.

  • bizzinger

    Rant: Identify theft. Got a call yesterday that someone tried to get a credit card in my name. Any tips?
    *
    Rave: I’ve got great friends, a decent job, a fairly nice family, and I know how to make guacamole. I’ll take that.

    • It’s just me

      That’s awful. Check out the FTC website – it has a good ID theft page. I’d pull all three of your credit reports (you can do it for free if you haven’t done it yet this year) – use the link at the FTC website, NOT one of the other “free credit report” websites. I’d also likely put a freeze on your credit so nobody can do a credit check to open another account. Good luck

  • HATCHING RIGHT NOW! The second Eaglet! dceaglecam.org.

    • FridayGirl

      Did I already miss it? I can’t see anything :/

      • ke

        Thanks Victoria!
        .
        FridayGirl, is your flash player working? I just see the parent bird sitting on the nest…no baby visible.

        • FridayGirl

          Yeah, that’s what I meant. I think the egg/baby might be under there somewhere. But no sign of anything but the mom.

    • ke

      It’s nice to listen to with the sound on!

    • wdc

      You know who needs to up their housekeeping game?? Eagle parents. Dead fish all over the nest… ew. Although, I suppose if they’re both ok with it, it’s none of my business…

      • Anonamom

        Bahahaha… this really made me laugh, thanks wdc!!

      • dcd

        I bet Mrs. Eagle asked Mr. Eagle to clean up, and he was to busy with work. Those rabbits don’t hunt themselves, you know.
        .
        [It’s a JOKE, people.]

    • Tall E

      Thanks for the heads up! Very cool to see both chicks and love having the arboretum sounds.

  • Andie302

    Late question: Anyone want a 6:30pm reservation tonight at Kinship for 2? Let me know in the next half hour or so or I will cancel. Comment and I will get Dan to our us in touch to give you the name on the reservation! Wish I could go but can’t make it.

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