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Random Reader Rant and/or Revel

by Prince Of Petworth — March 8, 2017 at 9:15 am 143 Comments

dc_neighborhood_news
Photo by PoPville flickr user Pablo Raw

You can talk about whatever is on your mind – quality of life issues, a beautiful tree you spotted, scuttlebutt, or any random questions/thoughts you may have. But please no personal attacks and no need to correct people’s grammar. This is a place to vent and/or celebrate things about daily life in DC.

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  • My school district is closed for students but open for staff today. A lot of parents are pissed and I understand it – why did they wait until 7:30 the night before to announce the closure? I think the school district did the right thing because being massively understaffed is a safety issue. I came in because I need to play catch up but I’m wearing my Nevertheless, she persisted t-shirt 🙂
    Question: Has anybody bought a bike from Gearin’ Up Bicycles? I’m wondering if that might be a good bet since I can speak to somebody who can make a recommendation and get a used bike. I figure even if I don’t turn into a bike commuter, it would be a nice way to run shorter errands on the weekends, since I try to ditch my car then anyway.
    Revel: This weather!

    • blues

      That’s hard – I agree that your district did the right thing, but man 7:30 the night before can make it hard to scramble and play “who’s day is most/less important,” assuming a two-caretaker household. At least it wasn’t this morning!

      • Right…it’s slightly better than a snow day, but barely.

      • eggs

        Agreed.

    • welshie

      I have not been to Gearin’ Up Bicycles, but it sounds like where my family buys & takes their used bikes for service- Phoenix Bikes- which I would recommend to you (no idea where you live, but it might be closer- it’s on Four Mile Run in Arlington). Phoenix is a nonprofit that teaches kids how to fix up bikes, takes donated bikes/parts and sells and services used bikes on the cheap. My first visit, they talked to me about bike types, helped me pick a few that would fit my size, had me ride around on them a bit and even recommended a nearby used bike shop to see a bigger selection. If you have no idea what kind of bike you want, REI was my very first stop long ago and I would recommend visiting there too. I went when it wasn’t busy and spent 30 minutes talking to a salesman about how bikes work, types of gear shift sets, what tires work best for what purpose, locks that are needed for DC riding, etc. I took notes & pictures, looked at a few bikes and left feeling much better about what type of bike I wanted. Good luck!

      This Gearin’ Up looks similar and closer to me in the District, so I’ll have to check it out for my next tune up!

  • anonymous

    Rant: I’ve been targeted by the same ticketing person for 8 business days now for my inspection sticker being expired. I get giving me one ticket or even a ticket every few days- but to return every single night and ticket me is ridiculous. and I now hate this person!
    Rave: I finally have time to go in the a.m tomorrow.
    Rant: I’m pretty sure I will get another ticket tonight.

    • Tom

      Agh, that’s irritating. Maybe they’re gauging to see if the tickets pile up to see if it’s been abandoned? But then again, D.C. seems to be pretty reticent to do anything about abandoned vehicles from what I hear, so I dunno. Not that this will help you at all now, but I’d recommend sucking it up and paying for a garage until you can make time to go. That’s what I did when I brought my car down here; I had dummy tags and since I’m street-parking-only and the car was 100% not street legal, I was hesitant to use my VPP. Best of luck, and I hope you sail through inspection without any hangups!

      • anonymous

        I’ve removed the tickets every morning as I drive my car to work- and the same person comes back every night- I could understand if it’s a different person- but the same person targeting me every day is bs. At least gave me a grace period.

        • Anonymous

          Why do you think you’re entitled to a grace period? Follow the rules or pay the fine. Go get your car inspected.

        • dcd

          You grace period was literally the entire year since the previous inspection. This isn’t a date that was just spring on you. FFS.

    • FridayGirl

      I hate to be ~that~ person, but why did you wait so long and not move it into a garage or somewhere to avoid the tickets, especially after the first few? I’m no expert on inspections but you could also have done it within a certain time period *before* it expired, right?

      • anonymous

        I’ve moved my car every day- I just hadn’t had the time to get to inspection station. All my registration and parking was renewed- I didn’t realize the inspection was expiring. Still I’m being ticketed by the same person every night- seems jerk to me. But I know that’s not gonna be a favorable opinion here.

        • Anon Spock

          They’re open from 7am 4 days a week including Saturday. I understand being busy, and I have worked 28 days without a day off before, but it seems insane you couldn’t get there at opening 1 of those days. Even if they gave you a grace period, 8 days seems extreme. Actually you’ve had at least 10 days if those 8 days were business days. Come on.

          • Anonymous

            +1. Not to mention you can make an appointment so you don’t get stuck waiting in line.

          • Brooklaur

            What if they were out of town over the weekend? what if they need to be at work at 7 or need to be commuting to work in order to be on time? 7 just isn’t that early, lots of people aren’t free in the morning on a workday at that time. lots of people have outstanding travel plans on weekends or other reasons they can’t get to the inspection station. I’m not saying that any of this necessarily is true for anonymous, but, to say that it seems insane that they couldn’t get there within the span of a week, on short notice, seems a bit harsh to me

          • HaileUnlikely

            Well, one is supposed to renew their inspection before it expires, not after. They didn’t just have 8 days to do this; they had months to do this. Allowing it to expire represents an active decision that complying with the law is less important than whatever else OP is up to, which is fine, but has consequences.

          • Anon Spock

            +1 to Haile you have an opportunity to renew before the inspection expires, and if travel was planned, doing it early seems prudent. Short notice implies they didn’t know the expiration. Anon commutes by car, so they see it at least 10/week. Lots of people are able to renew an inspection in the months you have to do so. I have no sympathy for someone who ignores a yellow sticker in their window multiple times a week.

          • anonymous

            Again- you don’t know everything. I was involved in an accident and my car was on body shop for 1 month until I just got the car back- and have had obligations already that I just couldn’t cancel. I was able to register my car and parking pass which could all be done remotely. I mentioned in my post I am finally able to get to the inspection station tomorrow- and will probably get another ticket before doing so. You guys are always so holier than thou. Anon Spock- you’re one person I’d never ask for anything- advice- sympathy nothing…So don’t worry about that.

          • Anonymous

            “within the span of a week, on short notice”
            .
            But it’s not within the span of a week on short notice. When you get your inspection sticker, it very clear tells you when the next inspection is due. You’ve got plenty of notice.

          • anonymous

            Try and go register your car now- You have to be within a certain amount of days of it expiring before it allows you to renew your registration etc. I try to time both registration and inspection so they fall around the same time. I never mentioned I didn’t know when my inspection expired. I said I haven’t had the time to get it done.

          • HaileUnlikely

            That really blows. The scenario that you describe is so improbable and rare that, while I don’t question its veracity, is something you can’t possibly expect the enforcement officials to magically know and feel sorry for you for. They see a car with a lapsed inspection, they issue a ticket – it’s their job. Given your one-in-a-million misfortune, you should be able to challenge it and get all but one of the tickets cancelled, or possibly even all of them.

          • Anon Spock

            Another anonymous poster with an opinion about me. I weep!
            You admitted you forgot when it was expiring, and you could have renewed prior to the 1 month your car was in the shop. Knowing that detail doesn’t change anything obviously, but I hope it gets you some leeway with parking enforcement.
            Holier than thou, no. We’re just adults who keep up with our responsibilities. Give yourself a 2 month heads up in your calendar.

    • wdc

      Wait. You feel “targeted” by a person who is doing her/his job– a job that is required for public safety and fair application of the law. You feel it’s “ridiculous” to penalize you for failing to adhere to the law.
      Really, please explain. I do not understand how you can “hate” a person for doing a public service job, and doing it consistently.

      • anonymous

        Uhm DC just does emission testing’s…Nothing about safety. There’s your explanation!

        • wdc

          Air quality has nothing to do with safety? Is that you, Adm. Pruitt??

        • kanon

          Emission testing is ultimately about public safety though.

    • anon

      Look, I get being that busy, I’ve had those jobs. (Though I’ve never gotten more than 2 tickets in a row for inspection renewal.) Take the tickets in after it has been inspected, bring proof, and plead and you likely will have to pay only one.

  • HaileUnlikely

    Question for Pop: With the new ads, do you get paid for any clicks on any ads, or only clicks to sites that lead to our buying stuff? (I have no idea how running a website and having ads and getting paid for it all works.) Asking because a while ago a few people were asking whether you had done something to make the ads more visible, and there was this discussion about that, and I noted that I just ignore the ads and don’t click on them. Well, lately, I’ve been getting more ads from a site called “viral kittens,” and…umm…I tend to click on those a lot…because I like kittens. If you get paid for getting me to click on pictures of cats, that’s a win for both of us. Keep up the good work!

    • LittleBluePenguin

      What?! Why don’t I see viral kitten?! I see adds for “5 shirt mistakes you need to stop making” and a ton of ads about glasses and contacts! You get all the good ads! But seriously, good question, thanks for asking it!

      • HaileUnlikely

        It’s probably some sort of intelligent evil algorithm that has figured out that Haile Unlikely will often click on pictures of cats but not on other ads 🙂

        • textdoc
          • textdoc

            (In which a NYT writer did a case study involving this very blog/forum.)

          • LittleBluePenguin

            oh! Thanks textdoc!

          • MPinDC

            Thanks textdoc – interesting article!

          • eggs

            So cool, thanks!

          • JoDa

            I must do an EXCELLENT job of being a very random internet user, then. My frequent ads are:
            .
            *Religious-based dating websites. Both christian AND jewish. I am neither and have not used a dating site in at least a decade. Yes, I have gotten one or two for Farmers Only.
            *Car ads. I haven’t owned a car in nearly as long as I’ve been off dating sites, and have no desire to buy one.
            *Republican politicians. ‘Nuff said.
            *Baby/”mommy” stuff. I actively dislike children. Plus, if I need the first item on this list, the chances of me needing this item seem A LOT lower (note the sites are religious).
            *All kinds of scammy “tricks” to get out of debt/get rich quick. I mean one step above the Nigerian rackets. Misspellings and all. I am not the target audience.
            .
            I would LOVE to see my profile.

      • FridayGirl

        +1. I would love kittens. I get ads about being overweight and things I shouldn’t eat (which honestly are not appealing).

    • Yes it helps me when people click on the ads – thank you!

      • HaileUnlikely

        I doubt that you personally have direct control over content that is somehow magically tailored to individual users, but on the off chance that you do, I think LittleBluePenguin wants to see kittens too 🙂

        • hahaha I do not 🙁

        • LittleBluePenguin

          hahah! I mean, I really don’t click on ads pretty much ever – though I did go out of my way to click on something about dogs photographed before and after being called a “good boy” – but I’d certainly much rather glimpse kittens out of the corner of my eye than “rare unnerving historical photos”!

    • I have also been suckered multiple times by the viral kittens. Darned cute kitties! LBP, I think it also is based on your search history and whether you’ve clicked through similar ads before. Since losing my own kitty recently, I have spent some time on browsing animal rescue sites.

      • LittleBluePenguin

        that makes sense on one level, but I can tell you have never, ever searched on this computer for anything to do with finding custom-made shirts or historical photos, and it’s been a very long time since I searched for anything about glasses….

      • LittleBluePenguin

        also, I hope browsing the animal rescue sites is bringing you joy, and maybe we’ll see pics of the newest binntp kitty someday!

        • textdoc

          +1.

  • SinSA

    Rant: My job. I am so discouraged and angry and upset right now. I don’t know what to do. (I am quasi-looking for another job but the thing is, I like where I work, I just hate the situation I am in and I don’t know if or when it will change). I’m being accused of things that I did not do.

    Rave: I lost 2 pounds somehow (yay) but am still way over where I want to be.

    • Anon

      I am really sorry to hear your rant. I am in a very similar boat. I’ve tried talking to my direct supervisor, but we have a terrible relationship and I feel like I’m the only adult professional in my department. Have you tried talking to your manager to see if there’s a resolution or a way you can find some peace?

  • hiphopanonymous

    Rave: Yesterday I attended an all-day training on ‘Managing Multiple Generations’, which took us through characteristics and communication styles of Baby Boomers, Gen X’ers and Gen Y’ers. It was actually very interesting and engaging…and a great reason to get out of the office. Also especially helpful, as I’m a Gen Y’er (well, cusp of Gen X) working in an office full of Boomers.
    Rant: Today feels like Thursday. It is not Thursday.
    Rave: After more than one month of no exercise, tonight I go back to the gym!! Elliptical, here I come!! (Still can’t run after dropping the table on my foot, but I’m getting there!)

  • Emmaleigh504

    Rant: People on my team do not deal with change well at all. A database moved some buttons from the side to the top and one person can’t figure out how to use database now. The other person came running to me to b/c she was afraid she did something to it. It was a minor change, just relax people!
    Rant: I should have stayed home today. I”m tired and cranky and cannot deal with stupid people.

  • CapitalDame

    Rant: I’m tired… I haven’t been self caring and I realized this morning what a mess I look. Past due for a vacation but won’t be able to get one until July.
    Rave: It’s a really beautiful day today

  • bruno

    Beautiful photo Pablo!

  • Jay

    rave: a member of Nestle’s advance team getting ready to bring the company to arlington showed up at the trivia night I run last night… he liked the venue and my hosting style so much that he’s including my trivia night on the list of “things to do in DC” for all the new employees coming to town!
    rave: for the second time in eight days, I found a smart trip card on the street… this one didn’t have nearly as much cash on it as the first, but unlike the first one, it was unregistered… (as an update on the first one: it was registered, but after talking to some metro employees, it doesn’t sound like returning the card to them would result in it being returned to its rightful owner… I’m just stashing it in a desk drawer, waiting for the person who registered it to report it missing and transfer the value)…

  • LittleBluePenguin

    Rant: I feel terrible. Woke up all achy and congested, watery eyes, just…ick.
    Rave: On the good side, I don’t think it’s what my roommate has….
    Rant: On the bad side, it could be any of the multiple strains of flu, pneumonia, or other illness I’ve been exposed to over the last week.
    Rave: I at least didn’t have a fever when I woke up, I have lots of meds in my purse, so I’m going to power through and then go straight to bed when I get home.
    Rave: Just gotta make it through 2 more days and then I go to Philly to visit family for a few days, including my littlest nephew! FaceTime’d with him last nigh, he’s such a little peanut!

    • FridayGirl

      If you don’t have a fever and are itchy/scratchy, it’s likely allergies. Mine have been driving me nuts every time I step outside. The warm temps and the wind have all the pollen blowing all over….

      • LittleBluePenguin

        That’s what my roommate said, she said a lot of the people she works with are having a terrible time with allergies. I took a Zyrtec to see if it helps, but I also took Dayquil and extra Tylenol, so I’m not sure which is helping right now….I just feel like I have a fever without the actual fever – chills, aches, extreme fatigue, but then I also have all those allergy symptoms. Ugh. Who knows? I’ll just keep popping pills and hope I hit on the right combo / don’t kill my liver!

        • FridayGirl

          Oh goodness. Whatever it is, I hope you feel better soon! The colder temps and rain/snow this weekend should tamp down the pollen and hopefully help alleviate at least some symptoms!

        • anonanon

          Be careful combining medications. I believe Dayquil contains acetaminophen (aka Tylenol), so be careful you’re not taking too much by combining.

          • textdoc

            And even regular medications that combine multiple active ingredients can be trouble.
            .
            A couple of years ago I stopped taking a particular cough syrup because its combination of dextromorphan (expectorant), phenylephrine (decongestant), and guaifenesin (mucus relief) was making me feel downright loopy. Like, so loopy that the letters on my computer screen were sometimes dancing/swaying. And when I was changing the bulbs in an overhead “boob”-style light fixture, I felt like it was a miracle that I got the glass shade off without dropping and breaking it, so I didn’t dare put the shade back on until I felt better.

          • LittleBluePenguin

            Don’t worry, I know my med-mixing! 🙂

          • wdc

            Off topic, but I’m so glad to learn that I’m not the only person who calls ceiling dome fixtures “boob lights”.

          • textdoc

            WDC, I might have adopted the term from you — not sure.
            .
            When I first it, I knew exactly the kind of light fixture it was describing.

          • textdoc

            * first _heard_ it

      • eggs

        It’s been killing me too, and I usually don’t have any allergy issues. I had to stay home one day last week because I had such a massively awful sinus headache.

      • kanon

        My allergies have been terrible so far this year. I’ve actually start using a neti pot, which was very bizarre at first but now I think it’s helping.

  • artemis

    Rave: Beautiful, sunny walk to the metro this morning.
    Rave/Rant: I managed to walk seven miles yesterday. This is what happens when you have a one car household and need to walk/take public transportation to get to after work events. I am glad for the exercise, but my IT band hates me this morning.
    Rant: This is such a busy work week for my partner and me. The house is a mess, and I really need to try to bring some order to things when I get home.
    Rave: At work and wearing red today. I also dressed Baby Artie in red socks (the only thing in his wardrobe that was clean and the right color). Little dude is a Red Stocking ally today.

  • maxwell smart

    RANT.1: Got invited (all expenses paid) to a conference/product convention in London by one of the product reps I work with frequently, but I’m pretty sure that goes against our companies ethics policies, which is too bad, because A: who doesn’t want a free trip to London? and B: my birthday would be during the trip, so bonus! Doing the ethical thing sucks!
    RANT.2: Got a call from the new doctor I had made an appointment with to let me know they now no longer accept United. Ugh. The doctor search continues….
    RAVE.ish: The untracked bus stopped mid-block (I had given up hope and was walking) to pick me up.

    • Irving Streete

      Dis you at least check with your ethics team to see if it’s a possibility? Can’t hurt.

      • textdoc

        +1.

    • elbeech

      I’ve been pretty happy with the One Medical group of doctors. They have several DC offices and continue to expand. They’re really on the ball with communication (all electronic) and while you have a PCP, there’s always a doctor available to see.

      • maxwell smart

        I’ve heard really good things about them, but I have a really hard time justifying a $200/year membership to see the doctor, when I maybe go to the doctor once every 3-5 years.

        • I joined in January and already feel like I’ve gotten my money’s worth. Access to same day appointments until late into the night if that timing suits me better is worth every single penny. Also, appointments start on time, my doctor didn’t just give me a referral to someone, he checked google maps to make sure it was convenient for me, and my medications are ready at my CVS before I even get there and if I need to change I us the app to message them and they change it.

          • maxwell smart

            I suppose I should tell myself “Instead of spending $200 this year on unhealthy things like happy hour, invest that in your health” but then I’m also like “but I already pay so much for health insurance… isn’t that what insurance is for?”

          • That’s definitely fair. I’m single, my out of pocket insurance costs are reasonable, and I’m a woman (our reproductive organs tend to require more attention), so I feel good about spending $200 on access to care/care itself.
            I’m also at a point where I was looking for more continuity of care and direction, so having a number of services under one roof and in one set of records was appealing.

          • maxwell smart

            I’m with you on the last part – I’ve had more primary care doctors in the 5 years of living in DC than I have had in probably the previous 30 years of my life. Between doctors deciding to move their practice to Rockville, stop accepting insurance, etc. I’ve gotten to the point where I don’t even have a primary care and just go to urgent care when I need the doctor.

          • Anonamom

            Just an FYI, United Healthcare sucks. Fewer and fewer providers are accepting them because they hate to pay out claims and will do absolutely anything and everything to get out of paying them. I have actually turned jobs down where United Healthcare was the insurer. I had them for a year recently and had to fight every single claim that was made. Unfortunately, you will probably continue to have issues with doctors no longer accepting that plan.

          • maxwell smart

            @Anonamom: Hmm… well, unless I drop my companies plan and get my own health insurance (and I think we ALL know how well that is going these days), I’m stuck with United. I’ve found that United doesn’t really like to pay for preventive treatments – for example, Chiropractic visits, which for me, help to avoid getting injured.

          • LittleBluePenguin

            yeah, I literally cannot say enough good things about OneMedical. Granted, I have a lot of specialists that I have to see, so it’s wonderful to know that they are helping me manage this 3-ring circus I call my life. If you only go to your PCP for preventative stuff 1x a year max, then maybe the fee isn’t worth it, but for anyone with multiple specialists and/or a chronic health issue, they are absolute fantastic.

          • maxwell smart

            If they have someone there that can do dry needling on my back, I might be sold. My PT that I used to go to for needling moved to Philly last year and my back has not been the same ever since.

        • textdoc

          Maxwell Smart, are you a federal employee? Last time there was a discussion of One Medical, it came up that they apparently waive the membership fee for feds.

          • maxwell smart

            Nope

          • Anon Spock

            Fee is waived for bcbs members not Feds specifically. Not helping max, but maybe someone else was on the fence.

          • Anon

            They also waive if you have Blue Cross/Blue Shield. I’ve started using them and have been happy so far.

        • ShawThroughtheHeart

          Max, I’ll suggest it is a bit of a luxury, but also has inherent value.

          Here’s how I look at it if helpful as a data point: you get there five minutes early, they take you in right on time. You have chosen a time window (15, 30, etc.) and so know when you’ll be leaving. Your doc then walks you back out, so none of that awkward, your docs leaves the room and wait X minutes for another practitioner to come in and “release” you.

          Removing that ambiguity is a big part of how I justify the expense. I felt like every time I went to the doctor, I had to block off X hours on my calendar b/c I didn’t know when I’d actually be seen or when I’d actually be dismissed.

          • HaileUnlikely

            FWIW I completely agree with your overall assessment, but also am inclined to agree with Max’s assessment of its likely value to him. My wife goes to the doctor seemingly every other week – the $200 annual fee is easily worth it for her. I go once or twice a year – I’m also a member but honestly question the value of the membership for me (“My one and only appointment of the whole year started right on time and ended right on time! Yippee! So glad I paid that $200!”)

          • maxwell smart

            That’s one of the reasons I am looking to leave my current doctor – he moved to Unity Health Clinic and appointments never start on time and it’s this weird system of getting passed around to various micro-clinics to get simple things like blood work done.

  • bizzinger

    Rant: Insurance.
    Rave: Lovely conversation with someone this morning who mentioned that he always to tried to do one kind thing for himself each day, whether that’s a good long stretch, walking down the pretty side of the street, or complimenting himself on doing something well. I’m totally going to try it – anyone want to do this with me?

  • Matthew Schulze

    RANT – I need a job, and bad. Anyone hiring out there?!

    • ShawThroughtheHeart

      What kinda work do you do?

  • Rant: why can’t I just stay home and make gifs of me and my dog all day?
    Rave: two nights in a row my dog has acquiesced to snuggling. I’ve laid on the floor and he has come over and been the little spoon, at least laying against my legs.
    Question: how is our birthday breakup-ee doing? Well I hope!

    • FridayGirl

      I second the question! (I hope alright!)

    • MPinDC

      Yay for your snuggle dog!

    • HeartBrokeninBrookland

      I wonder too! If you need support, I know too well what you are going through (Dan can connect us via email). Weirdly, two things that have helped (other than xanax and wine) are: Mend- a free break-up app, and the Death Sex and Money Breakup episode and corresponding google doc with other helpful suggestions. I hope you are doing ok. This sucks, I am cheering for you!

  • BRKLND

    Rant: I needed to be at work today – but Rave: both my husband and I are wearing red in support.
    .
    Question? Has anyone ever used a paid career counselor/resume help service? I am kind of a directionless mid-career professional. I think I am pretty highly qualified to do a lot of things but maybe I am doing something wrong because it doesn’t seem like anyone is interested.

    • anon

      I did. DO NOT, I repeat DO NOT pay anyone for a series of sessions in advance. I knew that, I read that, I thought that was sensible advice, and then I was in a horrible job situation I wanted to get out of, and my search wasn’t moving, and wanted to do something a bit different anyway, so I did pay a few thousand (4 to be exact) to this guy after meeting with him once or twice – he seemed good and he came highly recommended by a co-worker whom I respected who had worked with him on and off for years. Of course, he turned into an incredible a-hole a few sessions after I paid him, so much that I never went back – predator, I’d say. Yes, I learned some insights about myself from doing Meyers-Briggs and other testing, but you can do this without paying in advance. I repeat, DO NOT pay for sessions in advance.

      This was a career counselor. Take a cheap course from someone on writing a better resume instead, or read a lot go good advice online – but I must say, the resume usually isn’t the problem. I went from having a good, solid resume to having an great one after a session given by a pro at it that was offered to us at a place I was working at last year that was doing mass layoffs as a result of being acquired – but my great resume (headhunters now tell me I have a great resume – but I’ve learned that means nothing, it is like someone who isn’t going to interview you telling you you have an impressive resume – it’s true, but a canned response.) It isn’t helping me much more than my good, solid resume was – the economy still sucks in certain sectors, and for people who fall into several categories that are routinely discriminated against, legally or illegally, many of which I fall into – and now add to that the completely illogical prejudice against hiring anyone currently unemployed. I mean, why hire anyone who actually needs a job? It’s kind of like insisting on dating only married people you can break up – as if anyone who isn’t with someone already is a loser. The problem with this stupid hiring era is that people don’t want to hire people who are highly qualified and can do a lot of things – they want people barely qualified to do what they need them to do, and only barely capable of doing that one thing only.
      .
      Career counseling is like getting financial planning advice – you know you are supposed to pay by the hour, for a fee-only for advice person, but since so many take your money and charge you a percentage of the assets, you do it – you fall for the nice, smooth talker, even when you know you shouldn’t.
      .
      Can you tell two of the main things in my life I feel I have let myself be ripped off by? DON”T DO IT! If you can find a professional counselor that charges you only for sessions as you use them, then go for it – they could be a true professional, rather than a predator. (But they could just be good at getting you to keep come back, like some of the useless social worker therapists I have seen.)
      .
      Good luck with it. I wish I’d been able to change career direction somehow when I went to career counseling almost 16 years ago. It is not an easy thing to do after a certain age, or certain careers, or with certain work experience. I had quit work and gone back to graduate school some years before that – that was really easy to do by comparison. Unless you are at that stage and able to do that now, making a career change, especially in this horrible economy, is very hard. There was a recession going on back in 2001 when I was trying to and was ripped off by the career “counselor”, and there’s still a great number of unemployed professionals since the financial crisis who can do a lot of things well, the actual unemployment level being much higher than reported, with most of us not even being counted – it is that that is causing the lack of interest, not you, your resume, or your experience or capabilities. Having a better resume and some good advice can help some, but it is still a terrible time to be looking for a job or to change career direction, having nothing at all to do with you.

      • BRKLND

        Thanks. I’ll take a look at both of those places. I’ve been browsing around my university’s career center but it seems most everything is directed at college level types (like how to get an internship). Maybe I’ll contact them to see if they have anything to help that isn’t on their website.

    • elbeech

      My friend Alison Cardy started her own business several years ago, and I know she’s helped a lot of people. Check her out! cardycareercoaching.com

      • elbeech

        That sounded awfully pitchy. But I do think she’s good at what she does.

      • bizzinger

        Alison’s great! I used her services last year and she really helped me.

    • Ashley B.

      I can’t vouch for her coaching work, but I enjoy Wendy’s First Person Singular blog. http://wendybraitman.com/ And Ask A Manager is a great resource on resume and cover letter writing.

      Honestly, I’d check some books out the library as a starting place for things to think about, tools, assessments.

    • skaballet

      Check to see if these services are available for alumni at your university. I know that career services offers these at my school.

    • Allison

      Even if you’re a mid-career professional, many universities offer career services to alumni for free. Try visiting your college or post-college professional school first to see if they can coach you a bit.

  • That One Guy

    Rant: Woke up with the premonition that I should call out today. Instead, I came into work. I’m regretting my decision to do so.

  • anon

    Rant: Still beyond heart broken about the break up before my birthday. Can’t stop crying and feeling sorry for myself. He was such a good bf despite the ending. Having trouble with focusing on the good instead of the bad.

    Rave: Good friends and supportive commentators here.

    • Andie302

      Sorry to hear you’re still struggling. Don’t beat yourself up and just try to take it one day at a time. I hope it gets even a tiny bit easier for you each day that goes by! Glad you have a supportive friend group!!!

      • anon

        Thank you so much. Started to feel a bit better today. Unfortunately, I still have a lot of his stuff at my place, and I just want it gone. Some is sentimental to him, so I can’t just throw it away. It is getting a bit easier, and I am trying to take care of myself the best I can.

        • Anon Spock

          I would offer him the chance to collect his things this week, and if it’s still there on Monday, toss it. You’re not obligated to keep his things sentimental or not, but I’d give him a chance to get them in case he’s not reaching out yet in an effort to let you heal.

          • anon

            That sounds like a great idea. Thank you. I do feel bad, but he’s an adult, so he can get his own stuff. It’s not like I am going to kick him in the shins if he shows up.

          • Allison

            In the words of Queen Bey, “to the left to the left, everything about you in a box to the left.”

        • houseintherear

          You could do what one of my exes did and put the stuff in trash bags on the front lawn! (Don’t do that… I’m obviously still bitter 11 years later.)

          • anon

            Lol. I will not then. 🙂

    • HeartBrokeninBrookland

      When my ex moved his things out of our apartment the other week it was the worst. But it is so much better now that it is all good. Get it out ASAP! Either make him come and get it or move it out yourself. Good luck.

      • mtpresident

        Agreed. At least throw things in a box for him to pick up. Or drop off at his place. You shouldn’t have to stare at that stuff.

        • anon

          I am thinking about getting a zipcar, and quietly dropping it off tonight at his place. I just don’t want to come off as creepy.

          • Anon Spock

            If he has a doorman or roommates, I’d just drop it off, but otherwise, I’d probably make sure he’ll be around or at least let him know you’ve left it. A quick text or whatever.

          • anon

            Just his house @anon spock. His house would be safe from thieves. I could def drop off with a quick text this evening. It’s already packed up in a cooler he lent me when my refrigerator broke.

          • Anon Spock

            Hopefully that will get things moving in the right direction.

  • ajr

    Rant: I thought interviewing was going well but I received a lot of bad news at once so I’m feeling really drained. I’m miserable at my job and want out so badly but I’m trying to be patient enough for the right fit. It’s increasingly more difficult every day.
    Rant: I couldn’t participate in the Women’s Strike today.
    Rave: I decided to offset my participation by donating $5 to 10 different charities that would mean something to 10 different women in my life who inspire me, sending them a note along with the receipt thanking them for their inspiration. I told my sweet & supportive boyfriend about it and before he even said anything back there was a $50 payment to my Venmo with a note that he wanted to match my contributions. So I guess it’ll be 20 different charities/women!
    Rave: Writing out these thank-yous is helping me feel better about the state of my own life. I’ll be OK with all this support I’m lucky enough to have.

    • kanon

      What a sweet idea. I might do the same!

    • artemis

      I love this idea so much.

    • ajr

      Thanks kanon & artemis! By chance, I met another young lady here in DC who grew up in the same area as me and we have become close friends. I donated to a classroom in our hometown via DonorsChoose and it turned out the teacher was a childhood friend of mine! Then my friend turned around and made a donation as well! This is making me very happy on what I thought would be a craptastic day.

    • LittleBluePenguin

      That is a fantastic couple of raves! Very kind and thoughtful! I’m sorry about the interviews and your job and am wishing you, internet stranger, lots of luck, I’m sure you will find the right job (or it will find you)!

      • ajr

        Thank you, LBP! I’m working on the energy to keep fighting the good fight. Today (and maybe tomorrow…but definitely not the day after, I promise!) I’m letting myself relax & reflect a little.

    • eggs

      SUCH a great idea. You inspire me!

  • textdoc

    Rant: So very tired. Nightmares have been crazier than usual.
    Rave: Warmer weather.
    Rant: Climate change.

    • ajr

      My nightmares have been insane too!

  • Sad

    I just suffered my 3rd miscarriage in one year. I’m beyond devastated. My husband is amazing, my friends and family have been so supportive — but I just can’t help feeling so hopeless. I just needed to get this out into the air today, hoping it helps to release a little.

    • I’m so very sorry to hear this.

    • artemis

      I am so so sorry.

    • wdc

      I’m devastated for you. I hope you can find space and time to grieve. And I hope for happier days to come.

    • textdoc

      Very sorry to hear this.

    • anon

      I am so sorry you are going through this.

    • ajr

      I’m so very sorry.

    • LittleBluePenguin

      oh! I’m so sorry, Sad. I don’t know you, but you are in my thoughts nonetheless.

    • mtpresident

      I’m so very sorry. Having suffered one miscarriage, I can’t fathom the pain of three. Sending love and hugs.

    • Formerly ParkViewRes

      I’m so sorry. I know many who are struggling with trying to have a kid. It is such a tough thing to go through.

    • eggs

      I’m so sorry.

      • Sad

        Never underestimate the compassion of strangers. It may sound silly, but just typing it and seeing your responses have improved my mood dramatically! Kindness is an amazing thing! Thank you.

    • Andie302

      So sorry to hear this – sending positive thoughts you way

    • Liz

      I’m so sorry for your loss. Sending positive thoughts out into the universe for you.

      A blog called Cup of Jo has a moving post from Nov 2015 where women shared their miscarriage experiences. This is often not discussed, despite being something that many women experience, and these stories can help women/couples feel less alone. I tried to post the link but my comment was moderated – please look it up if you think it might help.

    • HaileUnlikely

      I am so sorry.

    • Anonamom

      I am so very sorry.

  • TryingtoCarryOn

    Rant: Waiting to hear back on a dream job and I am failing miserably in keeping calm – competition is fierce. Please send good vibes my way!

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