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GDoN “Nothing cookie-cutter here” edition (reader request)

by Prince Of Petworth April 27, 2017 at 12:00 pm 36 Comments

706 16th St NE #2

This unit is located at 706 16th Street, NE. The MRIS listing says:

“Dramatic new ground-up design and construction. One-of-a-kind 4-level layout and fully custom finishes. Nothing cookie-cutter here. Floor-to-ceiling glass across all four exposures, open stairs, and honed white oak floors throughout. Chef’s kitchen, TWO en suite Bedrooms, private roof deck w/360 views, secure off-street parking. Steps to H St shops, eats, nightlife, streetcar.”


You can see more photos here.

This 2 bed/2.5 bath is going for $739,000 ($299 monthly fee.)

  • nancy

    I’m sorry, but ugh.

  • dcd

    Compare “Nothing cookie-cutter here” with the caption for photos 2″Stainless, gas, + quartz serving island” and 4 “White oak floors and stairs throughout.”
    Marketing fail.

    • LittleBluePenguin


  • Anon

    dafuq is this?

  • DavidW

    because there’s nothing like electrical meters at the front door for that high tech -ugh, look that you crave so much..

    • anon8

      Let’s not be too critical. There is a small plant in the gravel front yard.

    • ITK

      It’s a DC regulation – for all new construction, the electricity meters have to be visible from the street.

    • Grant Circle

      Oh that, it’s our steampunk motif.

  • Formerly ParkViewRes

    I hate everything about it except the roof deck. The price is aggressive as hell too.

  • bll

    maybe it’s just the angle of the exterior photo, but this looks like it gets wider as you go higher up.

    • LittleBluePenguin

      Yeah, I thought the same, or like it’s lopsided somehow. Either way, not a fan.

    • anon

      I thought the same, and my best guess is that it’s a byproduct of that camera lens that realtor’s use to make spaces look wider, that’s why it appears disoriented. maybe?

  • navyard

    I am not a fan.

  • Anonymous

    GoogleStreet view will show you that this place sticks out like a sore thumb among the low slung low-income neighbors that populate the rest of the block. Good night and good luck.

  • APRO

    tough crowd…lol Its NOT that bad guys cmon!

    • ET

      The inside is ok I suppose but the outside is, is I don’t have the right word. Looks like they started to go one way then changed their mind and just kept what they started with. I don’t feel that the inside matches the inside and vice versa. Given that a lot of people just drive by and never bother going inside a house, that look on the outside could pose a problem for the seller.

  • Quincy dude

    I have a burning sensation in my eye sockets.

  • Dognonymous

    I live in a tall, narrow, modern house and love it…but I definitely don’t like this one. The kitchen would work so much better with the sink in the island instead of next to the oven. The railings on the stairs don’t do anything to help define an already overly open space. The roof deck is cool, but I’m not feeling most of the rest of it. Seems like a tough floor plan with some challenging design decisions.

  • MadMax

    LOL someone spent time to make this thinking it was a good idea! You trippin bro.

  • Quincy dude

    Also, two BMWs in the parking pad. Because of course.

  • ke

    I would be curious to know if the same folks that deride “historicism” from the recent post would also support this design because it is…I dunno…modernish? (I don’t know what this kind of boxy paneled design is called these days.)

    • Bloomy


    • maxwell smart

      design isn’t an either/or

    • MadMax

      I like both when done well. This is definitely not done well, regardless of period.

  • textdoc

    I find the exterior really unattractive, and the interior has somehow managed to make the “open floor plan” look even more like a bowling alley than usual — I guess because all of the kitchen appliances and the sink are up against the wall. Seems like a wasted opportunity to have an island but not have it contain either the kitchen or the stove.
    The lack of pics of the view from the roof deck makes me wonder if the roof deck itself is nice, but the view from the roof deck is not so nice.

  • willie

    I live a half-block away and it looks better than what I had expected of the place. Unfortunately, it borders the alley to low-income housing so the buyer may have to put up with the riff raff.

    There is a new condo development with ground floor retail slated soon for construction at the end of that block so that’s a positive if you can live with the noise.

    Hard to see it getting anywhere close to list.

  • B

    Okay, I’ll bite – I actually like the interior (could lose the backsplash) – it’s bright and not badly laid out for a narrow rowhouse. And, I don’t think the price is bad for the interior size. But, yes, the exterior is beyond hideous. It’s like they couldn’t decide what to do, so they threw a whole bunch of stuff at it.

  • JayDC

    How does this crap keep getting approved? No, no, and no.

    • MadMax


  • JumpForJoy

    I saw this going up and had a good long laugh when I saw the list price. But, the unit is nicer on the inside than I expected; and the finished exterior isn’t as awful as I initially thought. That said It’s in an unappealing lot on the block (and looks out of place there) and that awesome rooftop terrace will have great views of the Pentacle’s parking lot (and all of the activities there). As much as I want to see houses flying off of the market in Kingman Park, I’ll guess that this will either sit for a long time at this price or will go well under asking.

  • asdf

    Are living rooms not a thing anymore? Seems like a lot of new construction and remodels focus mostly on enormous kitchens, with dining and living areas being a distant afterthought.

    That said, I really like how sunny this place is.

    • maxwell smart

      Well if you watch anything on HGTV, it seems like all that people want are kitchens large enough to film a cooking show. Look, I’d like a bigger kitchen too, but I agree – some of these remodel kitchens are insane.

  • Ann

    So. Many. Stairs. No picture of the bathrooms, but 7 pictures that include stairs, including two that are ONLY of stairs!

    • dcd

      Also, apparently, the third (second?) “level” houses only a landing and a half bath? Really?

  • Rich

    Nothing cookie cutter? There are lots of pretty common interior and exterior elements–like that ugly backsplash in the kitchen which looked bad enough 10 years ago when it was more novel. I like a lot of modern things but this looks cheap and I wouldn’t be surprised if it didn’t wear well.

  • Elkhaert

    Freaking over 700 for a split level condo!?!? At the end of H Street? Even if this wasn’t fugly, I would have sticker shock. No freaking way this goes list.


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