Top 11 Topics that Will Make Your Blood Boil and Fire Flow From Your Fingertips

by Prince Of Petworth February 7, 2014 at 4:20 pm 38 Comments

Photo by PoPville flickr user ep_jhu

Many a keyboard were smashed coming up with this list:

11. Snow – preparation/shoveling/saving parking spots
10. Politics – the mayor/corruption/council members/bleeding heart/guns/schools/Redskins/parking meters
9. Grocery stores – Trader Joe’s/Whole Foods/Safeway/Wegmans/Giant/Lines/Rumors/parking
8. Restaurants – I hate chains/I love chains/small plates/$20 hamburger/bread/service/bringing kids/good Chinese food/parking
7. Real Estate and Rental Prices – it’s too high/too low/off street parking
6. Bicycle vs Car vs Pedestrian vs Metro – bike lanes/buses/streetcar/metro delays/X2/parking
5. Hipsters – bars/drugs/drinking/yuppies/are their jeans too tight?/is their coffee too expensive? do they even exist in DC?
4. Neighborhood borders/names (see last Friday)
3. Crime – blaming the victim/race/affordable housing/iphone/good or bad cops/projects/crime cameras/speed cameras/cars broken into while parked
2. Dogs – dog parks/dog shit/dog attacks/pitbulls/leashes/dog walkers/dogs in bars/dogs left unattended in front of stores or in parked cars
1. Gentrification (of course) – Revitalization/Native Washingtonian vs Newcomer/myopic twits/I’ve lived here longer than you/race/development with/without enough parking/and all of the above

  • MV

    Of course their jeans are too tight.

  • kken

    I’m really surprised the bike issue isn’t no. 1?

    • KenyonDweller

      Yeah, it’s a good list but the order is wrong. Bikes/cars/peds/Metro should definitely be #1.

  • MPhilly

    Parking!! Double parking when there is space to pull over to the curb. Gets me everytime. Pull over.

    • gotryit

      If I could shoot fire from my fingertips every time I saw this, I’d have very burnt fingertips.

    • KenyonDweller

      Right! What is up with that? It’s even worse than a hipster gentrifier riding a bike into a bar with a baby and a dog on board.

      • textdoc

        And then wanting to get the happy-hour deals to go. ;)

        • KenyonDweller

          Or wanting to play games for six hours after ordering only one drink.

  • kallie

    get off my lawn!

  • bb

    DC vs. Virginia and Maryland drivers belong somewhere in number 6.

    • Anonymous

      omg MD drivers are the worst and absolutely need to be listed on here.

      • Truxton Thomas

        Yes, Maryland drivers. Period.

  • Homer

    Don’t you HATE pants?!

  • Santos Boliviera

    Absolutely spot on

  • In terms of responses on this site, I think #6 is definitely really #1.

  • JT

    Fantastic list!

  • I think of the number of these that are post topics, then I think of all the nice restaurant and coffee place openings and think – people must not get too mad about those, right? And then I look at all the “too expensive” and “plates too small” topics here.

    What category of PoP post doesn’t make it on these lists, now and again?

    • Monroe

      Panda pictures, beautiful sunsets, animal fix, doors and vestibules. Lots of topics!

      • Anonymous

        Animal fix! That’s true, no one hates the kits and pups.

        • textdoc

          The Prince was saying at the most recent PoPville happy hour that when he started doing the Animal Fix, he was getting a bunch of complaints.
          I guess those people have either left or quieted down.

          • Anonymous

            even negative feedback is good though, right?

          • Anonymous

            Complaints about the animal fix? You’d have to be pretty miserable to find a way to complain about cute animal pictures. As soon as I see it pop up, it’s one of the best parts of my day! (Well partly because it means I get to leave work soon, but also cute animals :).

      • anon

        I was surprised to see some rants on the panda pics – something about how expensive they are to maintain or something. I don’t get it, they’re cute!

  • Nadia

    My upstairs neighbor in the apartment/condo where I live at approx. Missouri and Georgia Ave has a “welcome” mat outside his door that literally reads, “Sometimes it feels like I’m the only one trying to gentrify this neighborhood.”

    I want to set it on fire.

    • kd

      LOL. Where do you even get something like that???

    • Anonymous

      That’s a quote from an Onion article.

  • DSB

    This list is BullS*@$! How is Justinbc not in the top 3!?!

  • Anonymous


  • jaybird

    To me its small plates vs. bike lanes as #1. Nothing brings out the ire more than those two topics.

  • LIsa

    Another thing without dispute- those are some nice teeth!

  • Rich

    Given an opportunity, people on the left who stand on escalators would be number one

  • Anonymous

    Bravo, sir.

  • Anonymous

    Popups have to be on this list somewhere.

  • Anonymous


  • Kevin

    Haha. And there is #6 of 11 topics that will make your blood boil on this blog. The Prince really nailed it. I mean, we were talking about Columbia Heights being a great neighborhood and very quickly got diverted to bikes. Honestly.

    For what it’s worth, I sometimes go to Bethesda Bagels around 8AM or so on weekends. I usually find a space right out front and make it back, roundtrip, in 25 mins. So driving works for me. At that time in the morning, I am a lazy bastard and often just don’t feel like riding a bike. I know this makes me a terrible person. I am very happy that you enjoy biking though…..that’s super.

    • Kevin

      Opps. Posted this to the wrong post when referring back. Now don’t I feel stupid. And maybe I should get some work done.


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