Random Reader Rant and/or Revel

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You can talk about whatever is on your mind – quality of life issues, a beautiful tree you spotted, scuttlebutt, or any random questions/thoughts you may have. But please no personal attacks and no need to correct people’s grammar. This is a place to vent and/or celebrate things about daily life in DC.

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155 Comment

  • I have reached the RAGE stage of grief vis a vis the election. I am PISSED that white voters throughout the Midwest were UNITED by rhetoric that was RACIST, MISOGYNISTIC, ISLAMAPHOBIC – basically, all the things I loathe the most. Globally, our standing is shot. its a new world order alright – and its the trump voters that I suspect will suffer the most.

    • you need to stop reading CNN lol

      • skj84

        hey. Maybe stop with the dismissiveness? People are upset, and the have a right to their feelings. You may think things are fine, but its not. Have some empathy please.

        • Except, when I was ‘upset’ when Obama won, it was OK cause I’m just a racist. Sorry, not sorry.

          • skj84

            You don’t have to comment on every post. Be the better person then.

          • I wasn’t on POPville in 2008 so I can’t say if people were dismissive, but if they were, that wasn’t fair. But that’s also a weak argument: “he misbehaved so I get to, too!” is called whining, and is one of the temperaments embodied by our President-elect, and is one of the reasons a significant segment of the population is upset and needing to vent. So perhaps you should remember how you felt in 2008 and treat people how you wish you were treated, with respect and empathy, instead of embodying the dismissive and bullying behavior of our new leader. Like, seriously, you are giving voice to some of the major concerns here, that the ability to have civic discourse has been destroyed.

          • the above is directed to Anon, not skj, btw.

        • +1. I’ve seen so much dismissive behavior the past few days I’ve made it a point to no longer feed the trolls.

          • As someone who is unhappy about the elections results, but not suffering emotional turmoil because of it, I can tell you that I have been on the butt end of a lot of dismissive behavior. The people who are very upset are doing it too.

          • I didn’t point fingers.
            And as kanon said above, “treat people how you wish you were treated.” Just because some people are doing it doesn’t mean other people should say “but you did it too!” That’s a child-like argument. We’re better than that.

          • FG, my underlying point is exactly that, “treat people how you wish to be treated.” The problem is that I’m seeing a lot of the same people being dismissive and then telling other people not to be dismissive. I don’t think they even know they’re doing it.

          • You’re right. And I apologize if I sounded dismissive. From my perspective, I have been seeing a lot of dismissing of dismissiveness in this particular thread. I am guilty of that in this thread. It’s an endless cycle…

      • I don’t even own a tv.

    • I am equally distraught about the election results and also believe any repeal of safety nets for low income and marginalized people will hurt Trump supporters the most. However, the demographics are interesting and worth pointing out. The white vote, if we can call it that, is the least homogeneous of any of the large ethnic groups. According to CNN’s analysis of the exit polls, (58% of Whites voted for trump, 37% Clinton. 30% of Latinos and Asians voted for Trump, 65% voted for Clinton, respectively. 32% of “other race”(not sure what this means) voted for Trump, 56% Clinton. A very large group of nonwhite people also voted for Trump. Republicans attract more white voters, we democrats attract more minorities and women.

      Also, 47% of eligible voters did not vote at all! (which is about course for the US since the 1970’s). A striking figure, every time I see it.

      • Blithe

        The huge percentage of eligible voters who do not vote really startles me — every time, despite all that I know about historic — and current — efforts to make voting as difficult as possible for some of us. Do you — or anyone — know where I can find stats for non-voters and/or non-registered eligible voters? Are they mostly very young and/or very old? Are there gender differences? Racial differences? Geographical differences? (I will Google this, but if someone can recommend solid resources, I’d appreciate it.”

        • The more interesting factoids, rather than who doesn’t vote, are the things I was reading yesterday, after pointing out here that almost half the country doesn’t vote, and then wondering why and googling – it is that we make it much, much harder to vote than most developed democratic countries. Other countries don’t require you to register first – you just go vote; almost nobody votes on a workday – it is on a weekend or the day is a national holiday. Most don’t prevent felons from voting, and we have more of them given our incarceration record than everybody else. These, in addition to all the voter intimidation tactics some places in this country have long specialized in that resulted in the Voting Rights Act being necessary to begin with, are what keeps our voting percentage lower than most other countries.

          I suspect there are many different demographics types included in the group of people who don’t vote – from those who are too busy working multiple jobs just to get by, to those (like some I’ve worked with) very highly paid men who believed it really didn’t change who had power and how it was wielded, to all kinds of people in between.

          • These are all very good points – the way we vote is so dumb!

          • Blithe

            Thanks for your response! My question about the “who” was a step in the direction of your more interesting factoids. I.e. Would younger people be more likely to vote if registration were easier/automatic, and if they could vote on line? Would older people be more likely to vote if there were mail-in options that could be easily/automatically obtained without having to specify reasons? Almost every time I’ve voted, I’ve had to stand in line for over an hour at a polling place that was near my home — but not necessarily near my job. When I worked with people who had horrendously long commutes, some didn’t vote because there was no way that they could vote, commute, and work — even with the hour that the job allowed for voting.
            I quite agree with all of your points. I hadn’t thought to google voting procedures in other countries.

          • It’s pretty simple – based on historical voting patterns, the GOP feels that is it was easy for everyone to vote, they’d win a lot fewer elections. The supposed hysteria over “voter fraud” is just a fig leaf to camouflage the true motivation.
            But in this election, at least, some of those historical voting patterns have changed. It’ll be interesting to see whether the GOP stance changes. My guess is no, because, you know, minorities.

          • maxwell smart

            Election Day really should be a federal holiday. I mean we have a holiday for Columbus and not one to exercise our rights to elect the leader of our country?

          • “Election Day really should be a federal holiday.”
            Absolutely. I’ll go farther, and say voting should take place over an entire weekend 48 straight hours. Noon on Friday to noon on Sunday. It should be easy to vote.

        • I’m stunned by the number of people who don’t vote by choice, others not able to vote by circumstances. How can the collective we make a difference here?
          Wiki says highest % of voter turnout is Malta (95%), many other countries where over 80% of eligible voters vote

    • After passing through stages one (denial) and two (anger), I’m now on stage three (depression). Sigh.

    • Maybe, instead of blaming an imagined boogeyman, you look at the fact that Hilary could only garner 59m votes and think about why that might be.

      • Ironic, Trump also won “only” 59m votes. Let’s not play that game anymore.

      • You should probably think about the fact that Hillary won 233,404 more votes than Trump but still lost.

        • You really shouldn’t. That’s the system, everyone knows what it is, and it’s not likely to change anytime soon. Move on.

        • HaileUnlikely

          We need to let go of this argument. The fact that Hillary Clinton could run for President of the United States against Donald Trump and not win by multiple tens of millions of votes is absolutely stunning, and we need to learn something from that.

  • Rave: Feeling better today. Hoping that everyone who is upset by how this election will impact low-income, minorities, and other oppressed voters will turn their rage into grassroots action and make it their goal to look around daily and find ways to help those in need — whether it be monetarily, volunteering their time, or creating safe spaces.
    Rave: Looking forward to seeing you all tonight.

    • How do I create safe spaces?

      • The concept of safe spaces is fairly abstract, but here’s an article to get you started. This is in the context of feminism, but can be applied to anything: everydayfeminism.com/2014/08/we-need-safe-spaces/
        The general idea is to provide spaces for people to heal and be heard rather than putting issues up for debate (as we often do here).

        • In other words a bubble where none of your beliefs can be challenged. You know how kids sometimes cry and just want to be told everything will be OK? It’s basically that. A place for people to be treated like children.

  • skj84

    Rave: That picture. I love Weimeraners, my family had one growing up. She was my parents first baby. She lived to be 16 and I have such lovely memories of her. I miss Bitsy so much. Also wiemeraners and I have the same disposition, Gangly, tall and neurotic as all get out.
    Rant: On top of the election results I went from “I think I may have been dumped” to “officially dumped”. My guy called me election night. At least he apologized for his behavior and gave me closure. And any pain I have from losing him has been absorbed into grief over the election?
    Rave/Rant: I keep swinging between thinking we are going to be ok to democracy has fallen. At this point I’m trying to focus on positive stuff like hosting brunch and Thanksgiving, but its so hard. I hate the uncertainty that looms over the next four years.

    • Your second rant is my life. Except I broke up with him and he’s semi in denial. Since the election I am a numb ball of nothingness. Just numb. No real feelings.

    • “democracy has fallen”
      Democracy is fine. We had a hotly (even viciously) contested election in which the country (those who voted, at least) was evenly divided. The party that is not currently in charge of the Executive branch won, and everyone accepts that it is so. We may not like it, but Trump is going to take office on January 20 and there won’t be an attempt to keep him out, violent or otherwise. That’s not nothing – in fact, it’s a great deal.

      • skj84

        He may be there, but I don’t have to be happy about it. I’m scared he will destroy all the progress we made. I’m a woman of color, I am so scared I will be blatantly discriminated against, that segregation will be embraced, that I will lose my reproductive rights. Trump ran on a platform that blamed people like me for the Countries problems. Thats what I mean by democracy falling.

  • That One Guy

    Rant: Not feeling very sociable so will pass on tonight’s PoP celebration.

  • Random- Did anyone see that military plane doing barrel rolls over Rosslyn yesterday afternoon around 1pm? I’ve been looking for info online but couldn’t find any, and I tried to take a picture but couldn’t get my phone out fast enough. It was so bizarre.

  • Andie302

    Question: Was there no RRR yesterday? I can imagine why
    Rant: The obvious
    Rant: Won’t be at the party tonight
    Rave: Heading to Lancaster with fiancé’s parents
    Rave: I get to call him my fiancé 🙂
    Trying to stay raving because there’s so much big scary stuff to rant about.

    • Lol it was actually the complete opposite. RRR was posted 2 hours early because we NEEDED it! lol Happy Thursday 🙂

      • Andie302

        Thanks! The link wasn’t the same as usual, so when I just changed the number it showed the one from two days ago. Going to catch up now. I just couldn’t yesterday. I took the day off of work and tried to just focus on small tasks at home that needed my attention. Controlling what I can and all that.

    • Oh, too bad you won’t be at tonight’s event!

  • Rant: Really struggling with the election result for many reasons–trying to turn it into productivity but right now my emotions are raw.
    Rant: Tuesday became a huge ordeal for me and my partner. A normal doctor’s visit ended with us rushing to the hospital due to low fetal heart rate. Baby was fine once monitored, but I honestly think both the election returns and stress of being scared about the baby sent me into really consistent contractions to the point of, is tonight the night? So they kept me overnight. We were so unprepared, didn’t even have our phone chargers or a change of clothes or toiletries or dinner or anything. We don’t have a car seat either.
    Rave: We’ll be checking a lot of stuff off on our prep list tomorrow after this scare we had on Tuesday! With everything going on, I’m trying to take things one day at a time.

    • So scary! Sending good thoughts your way.

    • Blithe

      Glad that the baby — and you — are both fine!

    • Glad everyone is ok!! And yes, the perfect kick in the butt to get in gear for his/her arrival!

    • I’m really glad to hear that everything is okay with the baby. I have to admit that I packed a hospital bag around 16 weeks just in case I’m sent to the hospital for any reason (but with my history, it’s a serious concern). Hopefully this will be the last time your little one gives you that kind of a fright.

    • So glad you are all ok! Sounds scary, though, I’m sorry. As for prep–try to focus on the high-priority stuff first, otherwise you might get overwhelmed. As far as the car seat goes–worst case scenario, you could have had someone pick one up for you from Target for you before discharge. Even if the baby does come early, they don’t need much in the early days, so you’ve got time for most everything. Sending love and hugs your way!

    • Please exercise some radical self-care right now. When I was pregnant, I refused to follow the campaign and honestly I think it helped my stress levels so much. Give yourself permission to shut down FB, avoid the news, grieve, and spend time with people who love and affirm you if that’s what you need. Do what you gotta do right now to take care of yourself. I’m sending you very best wishes for an easy pregnancy and labor and delivery.

    • Glad to hear everything is OK! That must’ve been very scary.

  • Recs for appliance repair please? The dryer stopped tumbling. Yesterday was a shitty day all around.

    • Lol, our dishwasher stopped working again so I feel your pain! We like Wooten Appliance.

    • HaileUnlikely

      I will insert my standard plug for Consumer Checkbook here. It’s something like $48 for a four-year subscription and has lots of good info. I have not used any appliance repair companies but a quick look at Consumer Checkbook suggests that “Alco Appliance” and “Silver Spring Appliance Repair” are likely a couple of good bets.
      On another note, if your dryer is more than a few years old and is not a high-end expensive dryer, you might want to consider just buying a new one.

      • I have a stacking set, precisely sized for the closet they’re in… I wonder if you can buy separates?

        • I just went through the whole washer/dryer ordeal so have some real tips. First, for the dryer, check that your exhaust vent is open. Mine -13+ years old- had a spring opening that rusted and kept it shut – that killed the dryer. If your appliance is over 10 years old, it’s probably best to get a new one. Buying just a new dryer and stacking in over the old washer won’t really work – the stacking kits may not be compatible. It probably could be jury-rigged, but I wouldn’t suggest it.

          There is not really a lot of choice for full size stackables. After endless research I bought a new Whirlpool Duet set. The other contender was a Samsung, but the control panel on the dryer was stupidly designed – tilted back – so you can barely see it once it is stacked.

          I found the Whirlpool on sale at Home Depot for $661 – but they don’t do installation, so you have to find & pay someone pay extra for that. I called M&M appliance and they offered to match that price, and include delivery & installation. I bought from them and had a mixed experience – the delivery guys didn’t bring the stacking kit – delay of 3 more days – and intended to use a cheap flimsy duct instead of the recommended semi-rigid. Then the new dryer was leaking water and the guy they send out to check it said the dryer was defective. Another 4 days wait for another guy to come check it. He said 99% of the time this is because of a closed duct vent, and that’s when he popped it open with a pocket knife. I was not a happy client by this point and told them so. BUT – the owner of the company called me, listened to all I had to say, was very responsive, agreed totally that they had messed up and offered some compensation. So I would recommend M & M Appliance.

          • Thanks victoria! Very useful. I looked at the Whirlpool Duet set… how do you reach the control panel for the dryer? My current stacking set has controls for both machines in the middle.

      • yep, I found Alco through Checkbook for a broken fridge and liked them a lot.

        • Andie302

          I’ve used Alco and they are great, but they don’t work on Samsung dryers. It’d be worth giving them a call. I was impressed with the company that ended up fixing our basement dryer recently, but I didn’t arrange it and have no idea what company it was!

    • Sears is always good, whether you bought it there or not

      • Had a terrible experience with Sears this yr. Original tech was fine, but the 2nd guy lied and said I wasn’t home when he came by; no buzzer rung & I was home for over an hour before the appt time. Because he didn’t close out my task, they couldn’t refund my money. Took me getting my cc company involved before I was able to get my money back.

  • Blithe

    Rant: When the President-elect is endorsed by the KKK, the potential consequences are a lot more searing than “Hey, your guy lost”. Really.
    Rant: Summoning the patience to calmly discuss with people who might be too focused on their own privileges, their own power, and their own viewpoints to get the difference between anxiety and fear. And accepting that there are a whole lot of people in DC, especially in New DC who, well, it’s not that they don’t get it, it’s that they just don’t care. It really can be a game for them. Must be nice?
    Rant: Growing up in DC, without direct political representation on any level, I don’t quite get “states rights”. One more reason that I hope that DC gets statehood within my lifetime. In the current political climate, this doesn’t seem likely. I hope I live long enough and stay strong enough to witness and even to participate in the other side of the cycle.
    Rave: The gym is my friend. It’s been a great way to focus my stress. And even my distress.
    Rave: Maybe one good thing that can come out of this election is political activism among people who have felt powerless, in many ways, and for many reasons. If we can just combine that activism with critical thinking and empathy….

    • I feel the same on your 3rd rant. Theoretically, if the GOP majority is very pro-state’s rights, wouldn’t now there be more assistance with helping D.C. to become a state so that we may also have these rights? I got a question this morning (I work with refugees) that gave me pause on a few things like this (I only ever have to teach federal, state, and local government on a very introductory level). I didn’t really know how to explain it.

      • “Theoretically, if the GOP majority is very pro-state’s rights, wouldn’t now there be more assistance with helping D.C. to become a state so that we may also have these rights?”
        No. Because D.C. would be a Democratic state, and Republicans don’t like the idea of adding a single Democratic representative to the House, let alone TWO Democratic senators to the Senate.

      • Think this through. DC statehood means one more member of the House, and two more senators. FOR a jurisdiction that voted 90%+ for Clinton. No, the GOP will not be helping DC become a state.
        In any event, state’s rights aren’t a real concern anymore, it’s just code for “we don’t like what you’re telling us to do.” Those same people who trumpet states rights would be ecstatic if the Feds could outlaw abortion nationwide, or impose a cap in state income tax.

        • Blithe

          “States Rights” is the ONLY way that I have of understanding / justifying the Electoral College. I quite agree with you about the “code” but I’m also trying to better understand the issues that might impact someone from a sparsely populated state if we dump the EC as I would like to do. (Not happening, I know….)

          • The electoral college gives residents of sparsely populated states an outsized influence in presidential elections. The ratio of citizens (2015 estimate) to electors in the following states illustrates this:
            CA – 711,723:1
            TZ – 722,871:1
            NM – 330,986:1
            WY – 195,369:1
            While this doesn’t factor in the political leanings of states (a voter in Florida has a lot more influence than a voter in Wyoming, for example), it does show that small states have an outsized impact. There are 16 jurisdictions (including DC) with 3 or fewer congressional representatives. Together, those states have a population of 18,845,282, and represent 59 electoral votes. In contract, California has a population of more than double that – 39,144,818 – and 55 electoral votes. New York, with a population of 19,795,791 (more than 1 million more than the 16 combined), has 29 electoral votes – less than half.
            Small states already have an outsized impact on the country with their overrepresentation in the Senate (which is by design). They shouldn’t get that kind of extra influence on the presidency. Although it’s fairly non-partisan – in the last election, 8 of the 16 states went D and 8 went R.

    • skj84

      I had this privilege discussion with my Aunt and brother last night. While it doesn’t surprise me how sheltered some people can be, its the defensive dismissive attitudes that often accompanies these people that bugs. Like you can’t fathom that other people don’t have the same experiance, or there are challenges out there? I have privilege. I’m an educated middle class woman. I haven’t personally really experienced discrimination, at least outwardly. But that doesn’t mean discrimination doesn’t exist. That there aren’t injustices perpetrated against people of color. Why is being self aware so hard for some people?

    • “It’s not that they don’t get it, it’s that they don’t care.”

      That is fundamentally white privilege in action. “Oh this doesn’t affect me, so it isn’t my problem.” I know it doesn’t make it better, but if it helps: I’m white, I’m privileged. I recognize that while I’m anxious and sad and upset about what this means for our country, the fundamental fear that people of color, non-Christians, LGBTQ, people with disabilities, and immigrants must be feeling is greater and so much more immediate. I care deeply, and I promise to do more than just rant on Facebook over the next four years.

      • Blithe

        I does make a difference! It truly does! First off, I personally appreciate your words of support and commiseration. Politically though, as a member of a minority group, I recognize that change is most effectively accomplished when the power of people who already have power and access can be used to support mutual goals and positive change. I appreciate your commitment to go beyond Facebook. It matters! I also don’t discount the power of Facebook ranting and PoPville ranting in changing hearts and minds one personal relationship, one meaningful thought, one positive interaction at a time. ((hugs))

      • I agree so much. I had an upsetting conversation yesterday with a co-worker who haaates Trump (and has given Trump’s and his supporters’ racism as a primary reason). Yesterday I asked him how he was so functional. He said that he’s decided he “just doesn’t care.” (Spoiler alert: he’s a straight white male.) I tried to explain to him that it was his demographics that gives him the freedom to not care and that many/most people don’t have that privilege. He didn’t get it, but I’m going to keep at it.

        • Definitely keep at it! Apathy isn’t an option if we want to call ourselves decent people. I hope he gets that.

  • Rant: Fights breaking out on college campuses. Muslim women having their hijabs torn from their heads. The n-word making a comeback.
    When my kids cried, and when they asked fearfully which of their classmates would have to leave the US, I wondered if I was to blame for their fear. I could have been more even-handed, I thought to myself. I could have followed the media’s lead and acted like there were two equal candidates with strengths and weaknesses to be viewed equally. They are afraid because the adults in their lives made them afraid.
    But the bigots have been given a voice, and confidence, and they are confirming my fears, and so I don’t know how to talk to my kids. This is not business as usual.

  • Rant: The obvious–grieving for my country and my family.
    Question: I’m currently interviewing for a position at a consulting firm–I’ve never been in consulting before. They have several large contracts with DOL and Ed, among other clients (largely public and federal, though some state and some private) primarily dealing with implementation of a piece of legislation that was passed in 2014 with wide bipartisan support (not getting more specific at this time because I”m still interviewing). Given the change in political tide our country is about to experience, is this a bad time to consider jumping ship from a stable nonprofit to working for a government contractor? What questions should I be asking regarding 1) job security regarding federal contracts and 2) contracting in general? I would so appreciate any insight in this area.

    • I would not do it at this time. I left the government for consulting in 2011, and it was fine. Never had any concerns about job security (even during the govt shutdown!). However, if I was in the same position today–well I’d be looking to get out of govt completely–but I definitely would not leave for consulting/contracting. Too many unknowns. Maybe re-visit the opportunity in a year once things become clear?

      • +1. If you are in government and want to stay, do not jump ship now because they may freeze hiring. If you are in a stable job outside of government, I’d stay put if you can stand it. At least until next spring when things are less uncertain.

        • Hi all, thanks for the responses. I’m not currently in government–I’m in nonprofit in the same area and looking to get closer to government. This position would allow me to develop some sorely need technical skills along with working more closely with projects funded under this particular piece of legislation, not to mention sitting in house with an agency I’m interested in working for. I’m just pretty unfamiliar with how contracting works, and not sure what questions I should be asking to get a better sense of how secure these projects are, how new work is assigned, etc.

          • Yes, but you indicated you position is secure and I’m not so sure it would be secure if you move to contracting. Questions you should ask:
            1. Do you have a bench? i.e. will you support me, provide other tasks/work when/if I don’t have a project? And for how long? 2 weeks, 1 month?
            2. If no bench, will I be furloughed or fired?
            3. How many contracts do you have? Is there enough work should they lose one or two contracts?
            Lastly, I would only go to name brand companies–Deloitte, Accenture, Booz Allen Hamilton, Lockheed, etc.

          • Here’s the issue. If the funding for that project or that agency is taken away in January, they can tell you not to come back to work the next day. Not to sound extreme, but you’ll really have to weigh how much you value job security versus how long you might be able to stay there (especially if you need a clearance, which could take a few months to get).
            I second Formerly ParkViewRes above on the questions to ask.

          • Thank you both so much! So helpful.

  • Rant :::
    I don’t understand how everyone is accepting this “woe is me the white man” BS as anything other than a racist white nationalistic backlash against having a black president for the last 8 years and the thought of a woman leading us for the next 4.
    It seems like the moderate left and right is trying to figure out how to understand or quantify this nonsensical white angst. Which in my opinion would only further validate it.

    It should not be validated
    It should recognized for what it is and whole heartedly and completely rejected.

    I watched an interview with some Ohio Trump voters last night who said they openly lied to pollsters prior to the election.

    Why would they lie unless they had something to be ashamed of?
    —Notice they are not lying or hiding their support any more —

    If anyone on the moderate left or right wants to understand the trump voter all they need to do is soberly ask them these 5 questions.

    • Why do you support the Muslim band?
    • Why do you support men in power grabbing woman by the P#SSY?
    • Why do you support stop and frisk laws on the streets of American cities?
    • Why do you support foreign governments interfering with American elections?
    • Why do you support building the Wall?

    Up until now, people in the middle has been asking suspected trump voters “do you support” xyz, but that question was answered on Tuesday and is no longer pertinent.

    Finally as a white man with trump supporters in my extended family and wider social circles (thank goodness I have to go pretty wide in my circle for this crowd) I feel I have already been let into the room so to speak about why the trump voter supports these things and I can tell the reasons are exactly the awful, sexists and racist reason you would expect. Ultimately, I think this election may cause me to lose my job, not because trump will crash the economy, but because I am not sure how much longer I can listen to his supporters at the water cooler without losing it and calling them all bigots.

    • You have summed this up very nicely. This “downtrodden middle-aged white man” excuse is simply covering up a big old heap of racism and resentment, which I think focuses primarily on three things:

      1. A lot of people woke up on January 20, 2009 and realized that a black man was President of the United States. They have spent the last eight years silently (and not-so-silently) fuming about this fact.

      2. Same-sex marriage, the BLM movement (particularly the confrontational images shown on TV), and other such cultural shifts have created further unease in the “Red States” that society is changing, and in their view not for the better.

      3. Trump offers a convenient excuse for whatever personal mistakes you’ve made in your life. If you never bothered to finish high school, preferred to “party” instead of study, had no real plan for your life, and now you’re sitting around at 45 wondering what the hell went wrong with your life and why your kid is meth head, Trump gives you an excuse. It’s the Mexicans and other foreigners who robbed you of all of your opportunities! Give me a break. I know that this isn’t the universal experience, but it is surely a significant part of the mix.

      • HaileUnlikely

        I can’t argue with the notion that a substantial proportion of Trump-voters are motivated by disgusting, heinous motivations. But if it is the case that they all are, how in the world do you explain the fact that Trump won a lot of precincts that President Obama dominated not only in 2008 but also in 2012? Communities that President Obama won by double-digits in 2012 went to Trump because of racism and the like?

        • While I don’t agree with Magoo on every aspect of his points (particularly #3, that is waaaay more nuanced than we have time to get into here), I would submit that misogyny also reared its ugly head. I work with a lot of different kinds of people, including many women of color – they all expressed their sorrow that while people might be able to get on board voting for a black man, there was just no hope of them voting for a woman….many of us sense that, deep down, many many men simply don’t want to be “bossed around” by a woman.

        • The answer is that in just this last year alone, division was heightened via BLM/All Lives Matter, the faux war on cops, the Kneeling and everything else. Things went from “moderate” to down right offensive to some. When they finally do a year in review, there will be so many polar events that happened in the year that created a division we did not have a few years ago. Obama ran on a platform of hope while this election was more of me vs you scenario and the silent majority had enough.

        • From what I have read ( I am not an expert on the electorate of these places) I believe it was because of an increased turn out in these areas. It seems there were just a vast increase in turn out in these counties, IE these people came out from under rocks after being emboldened by Trumps rhetoric as so stated by Mr. Magoo.
          And my point was we have to resist the urge to apply our liberal ideas “of everyone should have their voice heard” which only further emboldens these folks.
          I am not suggesting we attempt to mute their speech – but rather define it as racist not angst.

        • Blithe

          I’m curious — and over-generalizing, but without knowing anything at all about these precincts, I wonder if different people voted. This could be true if the population changed — as the population in some DC neighborhoods has changed rapidly over the last 8-10 years. It could also be true if the 50%-ish group of the population that actually voted changed. Let’s say that there is a working class neighborhood with a 50/50 black/white population split. In 2008, and, to a lesser extent, 2012, the black population was extremely motivated to vote, and accounted for a higher percentage of the vote for that community. In 2016, previously disaffected white voters may have been highly motivated, particularly compared to black voters. The differences could be enough to explain the split. While I don’t think this is THE reason for the difference, issues like this could be A reason for apparent flips in voting patterns. Until we get a higher percentage of people to vote, it might be hard to tell who the voters are in the 50% who actually do vote. Please feel more than free to pick this apart. I’m very much trying to get a better understanding of these issues — and potential effective interventions.

          • HaileUnlikely

            That is very possible. I don’t think anybody has examined the data carefully enough yet to ascertain the extent, if any, to which changes in the population of actual voters in the same places between 2012 and 2016 accounted for the swing.

    • I also have trump supporters in my family – and some of them are immigrants from South America! And theyre bigoted AF. I cant even speak to them right now – am so MF pissed.

    • albany

      So the same counties who voted overwhelmingly for Obama twice flipped to Trump because they suddenly became racist? They woke up on January 20, 2009 with a black president that they voted for, and were just so horrified that they voted for him again in 2012? Look at all the map in the link, all the bold lines are counties that flipped. Look specifically in the rust belt that turned the election against Hilary. That’s why people are examining the issue, citing racism is a simple explanation that led to the polling figures and assumptions, but it doesn’t fit with the actual results. https://www.washingtonpost.com/graphics/politics/2016-election/election-results-from-coast-to-coast/

      • So you don’t think it was a different electorate than 12 and 08?
        I just can’t see people switching their vote from Obama to trump…so I am assuming it must be different groups of people voting in these areas, or at the very least the same groups voting in different numbers.

        • albany

          It could be a matter of a different population, or a different population voting in force, or it could be these areas were taken for granted by the democrats, or they all simply woke up sexist on Tuesday, or a whole bunch of people flipped a coin and they all came up tails, but that’s why a lot of people are trying to analyze it and avoid making the same mistake in the future.

      • They flipped because Democrats who voted for Obama didn’t turn out in the same numbers for Hillary. Trump barely squeaked by with 1% or less lead over Hillary in PA, OH, MI, and WI. As I read this morning, if 1 out every 100 Trump voters in those states flipped for Hillary she would have won all four states (and have 300+ EC votes). Or she would just need to get 100.1 voters per 100 Trump voters in those states. That’s the real story of this election in those four swing states – neither Hillary nor Trump would have won it by a convincing margin.

    • “It seems like the moderate left and right is trying to figure out how to understand or quantify this nonsensical white angst. Which in my opinion would only further validate it. It should not be validated.”
      While I agree it shouldn’t be validated, it needs to be understood and dealt with. Like it or not, and I don’t, that angst is widespread and deep enough to elect a President who, by any rational measure, is both temperamentally unfit and woefully unqualified for the office. Railing at people that they are wrong, wrong, wrong is unlikely to benefit any democrat in any upcoming election.

  • Rave (?): Seem to have reached an agreement to move to the girlfriend’s and Air B&B my place if/when the ax falls at work. Sort of a shotgun marriage by other means. Seems I always end up moving in with girls because I’m too broke to live anywhere else, not sure why they put up with a deadbeat like me.
    Question 1: Anyone know any websites concerned with maximizing Air B&B revenue?
    Question 2: Any wild guesses what a 3 BR full house with parking and a really swell master bedroom might get a night?
    Question 3: Where is the happy hour?

    • Hang in there! HH is at Boundary Stone, I believe!

    • Why not just rent the house on a longer-term basis? Hedging your bets I guess?

      • I’m too irrational — I mean too deeply in love — to hedge on shacking up, but I am hesitant to give up access to my house over the long term under duress. Although I’m prejudiced, I do think mine would be the better house for us to live in together, it’s bigger and it would kill me to lose the kitchen. Also, there’s a chance that I/we might have to move, so I’d like to make long-term decisions after we settle on the next job (if necessary). I was going to nose around and see if there are any “executive residence” type places out there, that would provide a good cash-flow for less hassle without giving up the place for a year (or more).

        • Executive (called corporate usually) rentals make a much higher rate then a typical rental (like 2x as much). BUT they need to be completely furnished, with nice-looking stuff – even though incredibly cheap furnishings seems to be fine – down to the sheets and dishes and pots n’ pans and wineglasses, inclusive of utilities, including cable (and the tvs, etc.) You will lose a hefty chunk to the company who finds the tenants and manages the rental for you (which you will need to do if you aren’t in town), but it can be a great way to go – especially at a time when lots of new political types will be moving to town.

    • “Seems I always end up moving in with girls because I’m too broke to live anywhere else, not sure why they put up with a deadbeat like me.”
      Irving Streete, you sound like a very intelligent man, so don’t talk poorly about yourself.

    • I doubt a 3 BR house is going to do well on ABB – but the only way to know is start by looking at what is posted there now, and how full their calendars are. There are over 1,600 listings on abb right now, plus another 1000 or so on Homeaway/VRBO. The market is way over saturated, and abb is emailing owners to suggest they lower their prices to laughable numbers. Also, people are starting to realize that abb charges the guest 9% booking fee plus 14% taxes, so it isn’t always the bargain it seems at first.

      Your best bet might be to rent it for a year as a group house.

  • When my AP has to make an announcement to try and calm down all the kids who think they will be sent back to El Salvador, sh*t is f*cked up.

    • houseintherear

      yup. This is not a fun time to be a teacher. hugs.

    • My heart just breaks. My son used to be involved with DC Scores, and at last year’s Poetry Slam, the vast, vast majority of poets were speaking out against Trump. Those kids were speaking from a place of fear and a need to survive. Many, if not most, are American citizens by birth, but their parents aren’t. The fear was palpable, and I’m sure that now a Trump presidency is upon us… I just can’t imagine.

    • HaileUnlikely

      I realize that the situation is likely to get worse but I have a lot of Central American friends in the DC area and many of them have friends or family members who were deported during the Obama presidency, including an elementary school student whose father was deported while he was at school and his mother was in the hospital giving birth. The kid came home to an empty house. How f*cked up is that? Yes, Trump will be worse, but I feel that President Obama has basically been given a free pass for a lot of specific immigration enforcement actions that we would strongly condemn had the exact same actions been executed under a president we didn’t like.

  • Rave: Interesting convo with new Gyn yesterday. “They can try and ban abortions and birth control all they want, but I promise you, I, and my colleagues, will always do the right thing by our patients.”
    Rant: That I even have to have a fucking conversation about backroom abortions and illegal birth control in 2016.
    Rant: The people being dismissive of our fears, who don’t realize that there actually is something to fear. Then again, these people all seem to be white men, so I guess to them, there really is nothing to fear.
    Rant: Two major upcoming family events have me worried. My brother was quietly pro-Trump, and now, emboldened by the win, is far more out spoken. He loves to bring up politics with about as much fact as a Fox News show, and he is going to be in a room full of liberals, several of whom are extremely upset over these results. I have already asked my mother to have a word with him about who’s house he’s coming to, but knowing him, there will be a ‘debate’ which will become an argument. I am not looking forward to it.
    Rave: He’s not coming to Thanksgiving.

    • While it makes me intensely happy to hear a gyn have such strong beliefs, it breaks my heart that we’re even having that kind of discussion.

    • I have to attend a wedding in the Midwest for a cousin who is a trump supporter. his parents, my aunt and uncle, are bigots, and are positively GIDDY that trump has won (my aunt actually wrote ‘im happy’ on one of my FB rants about the outcome of the election – my mom wanted to go over and slug her).

      Ive already said that if trump’s name is mentioned, I will fucking go right back to the airport.

      • I am strongly considering uninviting him now. I have him hidden on Facebook and made the mistake of looking at his recent posts. He is completely incapable of staying out of discussions, and I am almost 100% sure he will bring it up.

    • I cried on the phone with Planned Parenthood this morning. The woman I spoke with was SO incredibly helpful in assuring me what was covered under my insurance (which I received through the DC exchange!) and said they are fully stocked with multiple types of long term birth control options.

      • So yesterday CVS Pharmacy randomly gave me the opition for a 3 months supply of BC instead of just picking up 1 each month. I JUMPED ON IT. :-/

    • That reminds me, I need to get an IUD before the Affordable Care Act gets overturned and contraception is no longer covered.

      • Exactly. With a 3 month supply, im probably good until February and hopefully it takes him more then a month to repeal the ACA. I can get another 3 and be good for at least 6 full months. It really sucks that we have to think this way.

        • Emmaleigh504

          It’s so depressing that we may go back to the days when insurance could charge women more. I once had insurance that cost extra if I wanted the maternity option. I wasn’t planning on having kids, so I didn’t think I needed it. But to get birth control I had to be on the maternity option. so messed up.

        • Agreed with your last sentence. I’d consider getting an IUD but I’m happy with my birth control now. I wish there was a way to tell in advance whether I’ll be back to paying $10/month for it or whether they’ll charge me out the wazoo because that would make a huge difference.

      • I actually considered having mine out and a new one in yesterday. I have 2 years left, but who knows what the landscape will be like in 2 years.
        Real talk ladies – you may want to seriously consider your long term birth control options.

        • Anonamom, I’d get a new one if I were you.

        • Most plans start around this time of year, right? So you’re locked in to your current plan for a year, I think. I don’t think that a Trump presidency will be able to revoke your coverage mid-plan-year. But definitely get it replaced before your plan year is up!

      • I had previously scheduled appt with my obgyn yesterday and he said his office was already getting flooded with requests for appts to get one. Call asap.

  • Emmaleigh504

    Rant: it’s my night to work late, so I’m missing the Popville anniversary party.
    Rant: denial has turned into bargaining. He can’t be as bigoted in governing as he was on the campaign trail; Congress will kept hiss more insane ideas in check; etc. Maybe it’s still denial.
    Rave: getting my eyeliner done tomorrow!

    • Ill get there. I don’t pass through the stages of grief as quickly as others, so think I will remain rage-y for awhile.

      are you getting an eyeliner tattoo??

    • Yeah, it’s denial – I’m in it too. Was in it while watching the election returns come in, aided by those faulty polls (early on, I said to someone who was worried, “it isn’t going to happen” – whoops.) Still in a kind of denial that he won’t be able to do as much as he wants. Then I think about the Supreme Court and the views of many on it on abortion and gay rights, just for starters, and I think it is time to apply for that passport from another country that I can get due to my ancestry – though I still am in denial and can’t believe it can get that bad, though as an attorney, intellectually I know very well exactly how it can, through the Supreme Court, even without Congress lifting a finger to make anything change.

    • Bummed to hear you won’t be there tonight!

    • I know a several middle eastern women who have had eyeliner tattooed on– it was a trend in the older generation– and it does not age well. When the eyes get droopy with age the eyeliner looks very clown-like, even when it was subtle and tasteful before. And obviously, it can’t be removed or even softened with laser, because eyes.

  • Rant: I’m normally an extraordinarily optimistic person (strange for someone who has spent their entire career in policy) but I’m struggling to find the silver lining right now.
    Rave: After talking with my wife, I have a new plan of action for my career. I think I’m ready for a major change and my field is pretty much imploding at the moment.
    Rant: I desperately need a vacation.

  • Rave: I talked to my aunt on the phone for an hour last night. She is a retired teacher whose pension plans and Medicare may wind up taking a huge hit. We both vented and cried and laughed and felt a little better at the end of it all. She encouraged me to just take the time to grieve and then to work to be the change. I feel mad but motivated. I put on my pantsuit today and am encouraged to find ways to volunteer and make changes however I can.
    Rant: So so so tired. I had a teleconference this morning and was having a hard time keeping my eyes open. While in the room with my boss. Yikes!
    Rave: Looking forward to celebrating PoPvill’s 10th anniversary and seeing many of you wonderful folks!

  • Rant: Can’t eat, can’t sleep, anxious as all get out, making my way through a bottle of Tums.
    Rave?: I can still drink so I’ll see you all this evening
    Rave: My pup’s determination to slay her purple unicorn last night – laughing at her antics helped
    Thanks Dan for yesterday’s post about volunteer opportunities – time for me to be more of the change…

    • Amen! I feel so much more motivated to be the change I want to see, and finding concrete ways to do that is very helpful

  • anonymouse_dianne

    All of you raging, Cajun folks – my cuz did a live Facebook talk on the way to go unite against the machine. You can find it on his blog – americablog.com That’s where you need to go when Popville is not enough.

  • Quotia Zelda

    Rant: My husband’s oldest and dearest friend is going on about how Trump supporters aren’t so bad because his hometown went for Trump and they aren’t a bunch of bigots and racists. Except that my nonwhite husband grew up in that town, too, and he’s told me about the rocks that got thrown through their windows, the many times their mailbox was destroyed, the other kids who were told by parents not to play with them. It kills me that this man, who was the best man at our wedding FFS, chooses not to see the problem because it doesn’t affect him. And I’m mad as hell that his basic message about all the hate and ugliness that this election has legitimatized is “eh, it’s not so bad.” Must be nice to live that kind of life.
    Rant: Worried about my job. I’m not an appointee, but my place is often in the crosshairs.
    Rave: At least I haven’t started stress eating, yet. I’m still in the stress-want-to-throw-up phase.

  • Rave: I had a follow up meeting with early intervention. Baby Artie should be starting physical therapy in a couple weeks. It is a schedule that seems manageable with work, our commute, and home life. And it is just worth making the time to help get the little guy up to speed with his motor and language skills.
    Rant: I have been thinking a lot about how to talk to family members who support Trump. I am dreading going home for Christmas, but these conversations are just unavoidable. White people have to speak up and have these conversations with our family and friends, not matter how uncomfortable it may get. Does anyone have any suggestions for resources or primers about how to talk to your family about privilege, racism, etc? In high school and college these conversations usually just resulted in screaming; as an adult I just try to avoid them or change the subject. I need a new approach.
    Rant: Maybe if I had done some of this thinking and talking before the election, we wouldn’t be dealing with the idea of Sarah Palin being a member of the Cabinet.

    • Blithe

      Have you read “A Race is a Nice Thing to Have”? I went to a training that was excellent, but I’m blanking on the name of the presenter and her (sadly, textbook priced) book. If I can track it down, I’ll post it. In general, my suggestion would be to make it as personal as possible for the people you’re trying to educate. Many, if not most, people kind of assume that their own experiences are the default. Things that jiggle that are often helpful — unless you’re talking to people who are actively and consciously racist, which is a whole different thing. Good on you for tackling these difficult conversations! I have an extremely misogynistic relative, who, late in life, married a strong woman and had one child — a daughter. He slowly began to change as he realized what his viewpoints could mean for his much-doted upon daughter.

      • I will add this to my reading list, Blithe. Thanks!

        I do agree that a first step is helping people to see past their own experiences. And I think a challenging first step for me is going to be shutting my mouth and listening to those family members, really hearing where they are coming from, before starting a rant. I have to hear them if I expect them to listen and open up to perspectives beyond their own experiences.

      • Blithe

        Robin DiAngelo , Beverly Tatum, and the teaching tolerance project (southern poverty law center) have materials that you might find useful. Robin DiAngelo is the person who lead the awesome workshop that I attended.

    • Yay for the EI update! Glad the schedule is workable.

  • Rant: I work on elections abroad and I feel like we have just been pantsed, showing our hypocrisy on voting rights and hate speech to the whole world. Not sure where to go from here.
    Rant: This news on top of my recent breakup is making me very blue (no political pun intended).
    Rave: informed interesting commentary and feeling of solidarity reading the RRR today.

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