Random Reader Rant and/or Revel

Photo by PoPville flickr user Jordan Barab

You can talk about whatever is on your mind – quality of life issues, a beautiful tree you spotted, scuttlebutt, or any random questions/thoughts you may have. But please no personal attacks and no need to correct people’s grammar. This is a place to vent and/or celebrate things about daily life in DC.

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148 Comment

  • Bear

    Rant: I think a groundhog is getting into my raised beds, past the netting I put up a few weeks ago. Smart little bugger figured out how to get in and knocked down a bunch of green tomatoes while it was running around in there. If this continues I’ll have to put up plastic fencing around them too.
    Rave: Digable Planets show last night was great, even though it was pretty warm inside the 9:30 club. That was our first night out in town in a while….kinda sad. But worth staying up past my bedtime!
    Rave: Follow up ultrasound is tomorrow – the bear cub wouldn’t cooperate last time and they thought they saw something on his heart, but couldn’t get a clear enough picture to tell. They said it’s probably nothing so not to worry, but I’m human…of course I’m going to worry. I’ll be so glad to have peace of mind. He better cooperate this time!

    • Sending happy thoughts for bear cub’s ultrasound tomorrow – and if for any reason there is continuing questions about his heart, I can put you in touch with the right people for further testing! But the odds are in your favor that all is well!

    • It really is better to know. We had a similar scenario (though it was at my daughter’s 3 yo checkup), and unfortunately it required surgery. But, as LBP said, the odds of that are small, and worst case scenario, the cardiac team at Children’s (including the prenatal team) is truly spectacular, from the doctors and surgeons on down to the administrative staff. Good luck, and please update us!

    • Hoping all goes well! My youngest did not cooperate with the heart part of his sonograms. I had to go back three times. He did end up being born with a very minor murmur, but that was unrelated to the sonogram. That is the most common measurement to get screwed up, so please try not to worry, or at least don’t google everything under the sun. (since that may have been what I did in that situation!)

      • Bear

        I have successfully avoided Dr. Google! It does help that there’s a lot going on in other areas of my life, so I don’t have as much time to obsess over it. He’s definitely moved around a lot since the last appointment. He was sitting very low then and I was only feeling his kicks really low, but in the last week I’m starting to feel him more in my side and even above my belly button. So I’m hoping he’ll be better situated this time around.

  • Rant: Ms. Cleo died.

  • Rave: good opportunity to develop my data communication and presentation skills at work
    Rant: was at work until 10:30 preparing for said meeting
    Rant: in uber on way home, mom calls to tell me brother has been admitted to in-patient treatment facility for heroin addiction. this is not surprising, but not great.
    Rant: whenever I have stress at work it almost always coincides with family stress. As a result, I barely slept last night and can hardly keep my eyes open
    Rant: so much negativity this year. I need a vacation from myself.

    • I’m so sorry about your brother. Is it at least helpful that he’s in treatment? Or has that failed to be helpful in the past. Heroin addiction is just so damn hard.

      • He’s done outpatient treatment and been successful as long as he’s on suboxone, but once that’s over he starts using again. His two best friends showed up at my mother’s work to plan an intervention that was later executed, I suppose successfully, since he agreed that in-patient treatment was the next step. They live in the midwest in an area where young people are dying left and right from heroin addiction, so while I’m glad that he’s upped the support level, I believe this is probably a cycle that he’ll be in and out of his entire life.

        • I have a close family member who is a recovering addict on Suboxone. Through this journey, I’ve learned a lot, but I worry about what happens when the Suboxone goes away. It scares me, and to be honest, I would rather the person stay on Suboxone than get off if getting off means going back. I really, really, hope this works out for him well.

    • Oooof. Been there, SBinDC, gotten that call. You’re in my thoughts, hoping you are able to sleep tonight and find some peace.

      • Thank you 🙂

      • It is incredible how many families have been derailed from heroin addiction. Lost a close family member last year. My heart goes out to everyone.

        • derailed is right. I somehow find myself coaching my mom on how to not enable my brother and encouraging her to find her own support group since he’s living with her, but she refuses (“it’s no one else’s business!”) and walking a delicate line with my brother, acknowledging the medical nature of his condition yet still holding him accountable for treating his medical condition. I’m going home for an unrelated visit in 2 weeks and I don’t know how long his program is, but I feel selfishly relieved that he may not be there–I’ve been so worried what the visit would be like.

    • Oh wow. I can’t even imagine, I’m so sorry.

    • It sounds like your rants are making you feel very helpless since it’s all out of your hands. I’m so sorry, that’s a very frustrating feeling.

  • skj84

    Rave: Watching history being made in real time yesterday. I watched the Roll Call on my phone via Facebook Live while at happy hour. What a time to be alive!

    Rave: Two exciting trips coming up. Flying to Minneapolis next month to see my sister. We are going to celebrate our birthday, and gorge at State Fair. I’m going to NYC for the first time in almost 2 years in September. I managed to snag the elusive dollar fare on Megabus, will be traveling for $7.50 roundtrip(I splurged on reserved seating). The goal is to stay with a friend which would make the trip practically free.

    Rant: Cough meds are making me groggy. I need all the caffeine today.

  • Rant: baby illness spells that feel like forever.
    Rave: I should at least be grateful that, while mtpbaby was up at 11:30 (negating my plan to get to sleep early), at least he was only up one more time before he was up for the day–and only a little bit early for that.
    Rant: series of phone calls about an unhappy baby at day care.
    Rave: Day care teachers that genuinely care about my kids. I absolutely adore the teachers at my kids’ day care–especially the infant room teachers.

    • Andie302

      Did you switch from the G8 at Shaw this morning? I thought I saw you, but wasn’t sure it was you and didn’t want to freak out/confuse a mom that had her hands full with two kids! (I felt like “Are you Mtpresident from popville?” is not a standard question for a potential stranger.)

      • Andie302

        and I meant to add – sorry the baby isn’t feeling better!

      • Lol, nope–my wife took the kids in this morning, and we take the S buses. That would have been hilarious!
        And thank you–I think he is feeling better, certainly compared to last week, but it just feels like forever.

      • I Dont Get It

        This is why I never leave the house without wearing my T shirt that has “I DON’T GET IT” emblazoned across the front. just in case I run into one of y’all.

  • Revel: Grilled with a couple friends at my house last night.
    Rant: Friend helped me style my hair to blend in with this half-wig I bought a couple months ago. It wasn’t pretty.
    Revel: Bought it on amazon in lace-front so I’m excited to go out with new hair that looks nothing like what’s growing out of my head.
    Revel/Rant: I think I found the sweet spot as far as price – I have two people who want to buy my old car. webuyanycar offered me $200 for a well-running car. When I had to junk an older, nonworking car, I got $275 and they towed it away.

  • Revel: Grilled with a couple friends at my house last night.
    Rant: Friend helped me style my hair to blend in with this half-wig I bought a couple months ago. It wasn’t pretty.
    Revel: Bought it on amazon in lace-front so I’m excited to go out with new hair that looks nothing like what’s growing out of my head.
    Revel/Rant: I think I found the sweet spot as far as price – I have two people who want to buy my old car. webuyanycar offered me $200 for a well-running car. When I had to junk an older, nonworking car, I got $275 and they towed it away.

  • Revel: Grilled with a couple friends at my house last night.
    Rant: Friend helped me style my hair to blend in with this half-wig I bought a couple months ago. It wasn’t pretty.
    Revel: Bought it on amazon in lace-front so I’m excited to go out with new hair that looks nothing like what’s growing out of my head.
    Revel/Rant: I think I found the sweet spot as far as price – I have two people who want to buy my old car. webuyanycar offered me $200 for a well-running car. When I had to junk an older, nonworking car, I got $275 and they towed it away.

  • Rant: Got on a hot, musty train car on Metro on the way home from work yesterday. Had to change cars.
    Rave: New train car was cooler.
    Rant: For the past weeks, my lower back has been hurting every morning when I wake up.
    Rant: I am suspecting it may be my mattress since it is kind of old and in the past I have teleworked from my bed which may have caused some dips in it.
    Rave: Worked out 3 times last week and on Monday. Hope to work out again today after work. These evening workouts seem to work best for me timewise even though all of the advice I’ve heard is that you lose more weight by working out in the morning.
    Rave: Hoping that I stick to my exercise plan of gradually increasing the number of days I work out. Doing 3 days a week for a while, then 4 and then up to 5 days a week.
    Rave: Made my favorite chili on Sunday and I expect to be enjoying leftovers until Friday.

    • Some people aren’t made to work out in the morning, even when time permits. I’ve always been better with lunchtime (when time permitted) or after work. I’ve actually read things that said after 5:00 was healthy time to work out.
      A 1-2″ high foam mattress topper (I got a cheap one at Ikea) can prolong the life of a mattress when it starts to dip in the surface area.

      • Blithe

        Turning the mattress — flip back to front, and top to bottom — can also help prolong the life of a mattress.

    • How recently did you stop teleworking from your bed? If it was fairly recently, the back pain might have resulted from how you were positioned while teleworking, rather than from sleeping on the mattress.

      • Although if you’re going to bed with no pain and waking up with pain, that does seem to point to the mattress.

    • I do evening workouts too. Can’t handle the morning – I move too slowly and it ends up taking me like three hours to do a half hour workout, shower, and get out the door. As someone once said to me, the best exercise for weight loss is whatever kind you will actually do – so don’t let the perfect be the enemy of the good. As long as you are getting some kind of exercise on a regular basis you are doing great!

  • Rave: biked to work two days straight
    Rant: stepped in cat poop in my yard
    Rant: it got all throughout my cleat and was not fun to clean out
    Rant: neighbors on either side of me that feed feral cats
    Rave: buying a havahart cage… time to start bringing them to NY Ave

    • WHS returns feral cats to the neighborhoods they came from. Unless the cats haven’t already been neutered and vaccinated (if they have, it’ll be indicated by a “tipped” (cropped) upper left ear), there’s no point in taking them to WHS.

      • You’re nicer than I am, I was going to let Someone waste their time/money. Then again, this could be saving kitties from a cage, so I’m really glad you said something.
        Animals belong in the world just as much as we do. Watch where you step.

        • Or stop feeding outdoor cats, which is both illegal and a blight on the neighborhood. If you care so much about cats then keep them in your own house. Or perhaps you’d like me to leave their crap all over your yard. Please, tell me where to deliver.

          • Feeding outdoor cats isn’t illegal (though the neighbors should be following best practices, like setting food out and picking up any uneaten food 30 minutes or so later, so that the food doesn’t end up feeding rats).

          • A random person on the internet mildly disagrees with you and you’d like to personally deliver crap to their yard? Sure sounds like there is a rotten neighbor on your block and it isn’t the one feeding the cats.

          • Sorry. It’s frustrating to vent about an issue and have random people on the internet tell me to deal with it (“watch where you step”).

    • Consider a motion-activated sprinkler or other cat deterrent. From http://www.alleycat.org/Deterrents :
      – Scatter fresh orange and lemon peels or spray with citrus-scented fragrances. Coffee grounds, vinegar, pipe tobacco, or oil of lavender, lemongrass, citronella, or eucalyptus also deter cats.
      – Plant the herb rue to repel cats, or sprinkle dried rue over the garden.
      – Use plastic carpet runners spike-side up, covered lightly in soil. They can be found at local hardware or office supply stores. Or, set chicken wire firmly into the dirt with sharp edges rolled under.
      – Artfully arrange branches in a lattice-type pattern or wooden or plastic lattice fencing material over soil. You can disguise these by planting flowers and seeds in the openings. You can also try embedding wooden chopsticks, pinecones, or sticks with dull points deep into the soil with the tops exposed eight inches apart.
      – Obtain Cat Scat™, a nonchemical cat and wildlife repellent consisting of plastic mats that are cut into smaller pieces and pressed into the soil. Each mat has flexible plastic spikes that are harmless to cats and other animals, but discourage digging. Available at http://www.gardeners.com.
      – Cover exposed ground in flower beds with large, attractive river rocks to prevent cats from digging. They have the added benefit of deterring weeds.

      • I’m not interested in putting that much effort into someone else’s bad habits.

        • trapping and transporting cats is less effort? And note that the bad habits belong to your neighbors, not the cats that you’d be trapping.

          • At least it’s a done deal for that one. Two or three neighbors doing the same thing and maybe we’ll see some improvement.

          • “And note that the bad habits belong to your neighbors, not the cats that you’d be trapping.” All of this. But Someone sounds like they woke up on the wrong side of life.

          • I woke up fine, but stepping in cat poop was not my idea of fun. I’d like my kids to be able to run around in my yard without worrying about diseased cat poop. I’m open to any suggestions that are more humane than my initial thoughts, but trap and release back to my neighborhood isn’t good enough. Neither is a list of a dozen things that may or may not work.

      • I don’t know of anyone in my neighborhood who feeds feral/outdoor cats. However, I have encountered cat poop in my yard a few times — most recently, yesterday, when I was doing some early-morning plant watering, saw an odd-looking pile/pyramid of mulch, and tried to spread it back over the area.
        Having cat poop in your yard as a result of someone else feeding outdoor cats is annoying — I get that. But there are better ways to deal with the problem than trapping and transporting the cats.

        • I read the list you posted above, but it’s a fairly large area (OK, large for DC), so it would be a lot of effort and upkeep. I also don’t think that would eliminate the problem.
          If the neighbors stopped feeding them, that might work, but I’m guessing that talking to them won’t make a bit of a difference.

          • How about a motion-activated sprinkler — maybe that would be less labor-intensive?

          • That would also spray me and my kids, right? That would be fun at times, but not when I’m watering the garden or taking out the trash about to go to work. And I couldn’t keep that out in the winter.

      • awesome solutions, thanks for trying textdoc. some people just prefer to complain.

        • Half-measures at best. And I thought the purpose of a rant was to complain. I’ll take action soon (legal, of course). Bye kitty.

  • Rave: Seeing myself make some progress on goals from therapy! Being able to identify negative thought patterns and notice when my thinking starts to spiral is a positive, even if I still haven’t gotten very good with just sitting with my discomfort. And then to get reassurance from the person I was worrying about (“oh my god, she hates me, she’s regretting ever putting me in charge of this thing, I’m such a waste of space, i’m going to lose my job…” etc etc) out of the blue was such a positive reinforcement that I need to stop myself and stop being my own worst enemy/critic.
    Rant: Had extremely bizarre, vivid dreams that took a while to shake when my alarm went off. It seriously must have taken a good 10 minutes for my heart rate to come down and to be able to sort out what was real and what wasn’t. (Something about me being a noblewoman in ancient Greece but getting demoted / imprisoned for pulling down statues of the gods? What in the what?!)
    Rave: Looking forward to hopefully seeing some area friends for a HH get-together.

    • Clueless

      I, too, am going through a weird dream phase (maybe it’s the heat!)… I think I’m up to 8 or 9 consecutive nights of weird/vivid dreams. Some are harder to shake off. I always feel relieved when I wake up.

      • That’s true, maybe it’s the heat – when I woke up, I realized that both cats were sleeping on my feet, and those little buggers are just mini-heaters!

    • dream interpretation: the gods you are pulling down represent your negative though processes, which you are pulling down, and that you formerly revered. It feels like a demotion to change how you think, but when who your were (the noblewoman) was propped up by false notions (the negative thoughts), then when they are banished, it feels like a stripping down of who you are. You just gotta build up again to someone different with positive thoughts.

      • Well, that’s an interesting take! I mean, in the dream I was pretty sure I was about to be executed or sold into slavery, it sure didn’t feel like a good, positive, catalyzing dream!

  • I Dont Get It

    Rant: I was in bed watching TV and looked up and YUCK, there was a huge cockroach on the window frame!
    Rave: Like any normal dude, I grabbed my copy of Men’s Health (September 2014, ”28-Day Abs!”) from the nightstand and threw it at the cockroach thus
    Rant: Squashing the roach and my dreams of “28-Day Abs!” as both slid down the wall and disappeared behind the radiator.

  • Rave: Fiance now getting up five minutes earlier, which means that we get to leave at the same time and walk to the corner together. It’s a nice start to the day.

    Rant: This heat! I really want to be outside but it’s just unbearable. I miss my running.

    Rave: The game Drawful. It’s freakin’ awesome.

    Rant: Lots of transition at work. We will lose 9 people within the next month (and 8 of them will be replaced). Among these people is my FAVORITE colleague whom I’ve worked with for almost five years now.

    • My wife is getting up earlier so she can walk me to work and then walk back to her work. It’s only been two days, haha, but it’s really nice! Holy crap, 9 people is a lot!

  • Emmaleigh504

    Rant: can’t seem to care that my work production is low for the month.
    Rave: kitty cat has been extra snuggley lately.

  • Rave: Coworker’s kitty is rattled but fine from yesterday’s building fire! She is 20ish years old and I was so worried.
    Rant: Portions of coworker’s unit/belongings are not fine. He certainly fared better than his neighbors, but still has smoke/water damage. They are all displaced in hotels for the foreseeable future.
    Rant: Crazy busy meetings in the office this week so coworker was already stressed. Hopefully I can take some off of his plate today (& as long as it takes, as I’m sure this will be an ongoing source of stress for him), but…
    Rave: I’m on vacation Thursday/Friday! One of my close friends and I are road tripping to Niagara Falls, Buffalo, and Toronto. It’s the first of three vacations I’m really looking forward to because I’m exploring new places with fabulous friends (first two trips) and the amazingly incredible new boyfriend (final trip).

    • Thanks for the update on the cat! I’m happy that at least the cat is safe. It’s such a scary thing to think about.

    • Was there any word on the dog that got burned and taken to a vet?

      • I haven’t heard anything but will update if I do. Coworker is OOO today so information is in bits and pieces.

    • Ohhh enjoy Toronto! I was just back in DC last weekend and you’ll enjoy the weather up here!! It’s supposed to be beautiful this weekend.

  • Rave: Job interview this week and next week for two separate jobs.
    Rave: Ryan Adams concert last night.
    Rant: Lack of AC at Lincoln Theater and a heckler throughout.
    Rave: Made cold brew at home and wow, so much better than regular iced coffee.

    • How did you make your cold brew?

      • I just followed Smitten’s ratio and recipe. Went to Harris Teeter and ground the Kona beans they have there. I made a double batch, figuring it would see me through the week. So easy, and so much cheaper and tastier than the Starbucks next to my office. https://smittenkitchen.com/2008/08/cold-brewed-iced-coffee/

        • THANKS!

          • If you normally make coffee in a French press it’s incredibly easy. The night before (or at least 12 hours before you want to drink it) add the same amount of coffee and water you’d normally use, and depress the plunger the next morning.

          • Ah! Thanks Jill! I’m going to try this tonight!

      • I’ve discovered homemade cold brew this summer and it’s completely changed me. I do more or less the same thing except it sits for 18-24 hours (instructions I found said just use however much ground coffee you’d use for a normal batch of coffee of the same size). I line a sieve with a coffee filter to strain it (especially since I’m lazy and use pre-ground coffee which is a bit too fine).
        If you like sugar in your coffee, I’ve also been making vanilla simple syrup (1:1 raw or regular sugar & water, simmer until sugar dissolves, add a splash of vanilla extract and turn off the heat). It makes me feel fancy, and really easy.

        • Emmaleigh504

          Vanilla extract is delightful in coffee. Sometimes I use almond extract which is also delightful in coffee.

        • I’ve been doing the same thing– cold brew with homemade vanilla syrup (which is also handy for cocktails), plus a splash of half and half. I drink my hot coffee black. but cold brew seems better with embellishments.

    • Cold brew is life changing.

  • Rave: I just ate a mango popsicle for breakfast. It was amazing.
    Rave/Rant: Between the Mothers of the Movement and Bill Clinton, I cried way too many times last night.

    • I had mixed feelings about Bill Clinton’s speech. It was loving and lovely, but it was also hard to listen to him talk about how he tried so hard to woo Hillary, knowing that he was a philandering jerk later on.

      • That is true but he added a human perspective to HRC that was desperately needed after years of the Hillary caricature the media has portrayed. He reintroduced her in a new light for me.

        But I’m now really curious if Bill is ill. He had a significant tremor in both hands that was a little distracting for me when he motioned with his hands open.

        • skj84

          I noticed that too. It made me a bit nervous actually.

          • Go back and watch his 2012 speech. It’s there, too, and only slightly less pronounced. Perhaps something slow-onset, but not new.

        • skj84

          also agree on the humanising aspect. From what I’ve read and heard from first hand accounts Hillary she is a warm person who cares dearly about change. She is rational, yet you would never get that from the way media covers her. She is so resilient.

    • I Dont Get It

      His speech could have used some editing but I know its hard to leash the Big Dog!

      isbillclintonstilltalking dot com

    • Even better– Vietnamese coffee popsicles (my breakfast when I’m not doing the vanilla cold brew mentioned above).
      I was bracing myself to cry during Mothers of the Movement but managed to mostly hold it together. 🙂

  • Soft of rant: People with headphones/earbuds on in public. I generally don’t pay attention to what people want to do but it concerns me sometimes that people can’t hear when I’m behind them, would like to pass and say “excuse me”. I’m doing my best to be polite and sometimes get dirty looks when I go around someone. I’ve also had a few people jump from being startled. Another example is the “move back please” to make room on the bus and some people don’t move because they can’t hear. I don’t walk around with headphones because I like to be as aware as possible of my surroundings. Not necessarily saying I’m right but more situational awareness would be appreciated.

    • Emmaleigh504

      I worry about people’s hearing. It seems like every day I can hear someone’s music from a few seats away on metro. That can’t be good for them.

      • I try to limit my earbud use because of this fear. I am seeing the effects of partial and near total deafness on older relatives and friends – my dad had a miserable birthday dinner last week because he was situated in the wrong spot in a restaurant, and was too proud to say anything – and I really want to try to hold onto my hearing for as long as possible.

    • I see this happen a lot, particularly in my super crowded Starbucks near my office. I had to get past someone to grab a table and after saying excuse me twice, I tapped the person on the arm and got a dirty look. Ma’am, I get it – I don’t want to tap you on the arm either but I need to get by you.

    • So much content available right from your phones, its hard not to be “entertaining” yourself while waiting pretty much anywhere these days.

      • I wouldn’t wear headphones most places, but my Metro commute (and 20 minute walk through Crystal City to my office) is so incredibly boring that I need to be listening to an audiobook for it.

    • Agreed. I kind of stopped paying attention to dirty looks and just squeeze on by. It’s only awkward if you make it awkward and I figure it’s really not my problem so people can deal. I don’t wear headphones in public but if I did I’d at least leave one side off if I wasn’t in a stationary place (like sitting down on the bus).

      • I guess I’d rather people watch than stare at my phone all the time. It’s bad enough I have to stare at a computer screen all day at work haha
        And yes, it’s not my problem if people can’t hear me, I get that. I guess I’ll never fully get the wanting to live in your own little bubble and not interact (listening included) with fellow humans in public.

        • Oh, I totally agree with you on the bubble thing. It’s an incredibly weird phenomenon. (Have you read Fahrenheit 451? I remember reading it in high school and thinking a year or two later… wow, the “seashell radios” or whatever they called them are real life these days.

        • FWIW, interacting with people can be exhausting. standing in a line and having a guy who doesn’t use his inside voice “speaking” to a friend next to him while simultaneously yelling in your ear about why he needs a new computer for grad school when all you want to do is take a 15 minute break from your frenzied morning at work to get lunch at whole foods is exhausting.
          7/10 times I have on headphones with literally nothing coming out of them just so I can stay alert while softening the noise of the world and ignoring people – guys who hit on me or make otherwise inappropriate comments while walking down the street, homeless outside the building, random strangers whose conversations I would rather lay in traffic than listen to – and it only look like I can’t hear them.
          of course, there are people who are totally oblivious to the world around them. and yes, it is frustrating. so i hear you and believe situational awareness is a dying quality/skill.

    • Did you guys see the recent New Yorker article on headphones?
      Weirdly though, it doesn’t mention the people who are listening to podcasts or audiobooks instead of music (in DC it’s probably the majority of headphone-wearers).

    • I work in a food retail job and the worst is when people come to order/pay with their headphones in! Its super disconcerting when i’m unsure if they can hear me ask “would you like a bag?” / make any of normal pleasantries. Its just rude.

  • Apparently I don’t use the ceiling fan often enough, because when I turned it on last night, New Baby Kitty lost his everloving mind. Kind of hilarious, watching him try to pounce at the ceiling.

  • Rave: Excellent morning at work — logged in to find an e-mail saying I’d gotten an award of vacation hours for work on a major project. Looks like I’ll be able to tack on a day or two to my long rowing weekend next month to see a friend near the regatta site. And then got to head down to the auditorium to help with a sound check for an agency talent show. Lot’s of fun and some talented folks plugging in and practicing.

  • Rave: Working from Cape May.
    Rant: Having stressful work calls and frustrating lack of support while everyone just drops their responsibilities and runs off despite this being the most important time of year.
    Rave: Pretty awesome balcony that I’m looking forward to working from. And I have a paper I have to revise and edit so I’m looking forward to listening to the ocean while I work on that.
    Rant: Husband on the other side of the world. And either we have the room with twin beds, I get us a hotel room, I fight with my siblings to give up a room with a queen bed, or I displace my parents. I think I’m getting us a hotel.

    • I mean to say, when he arrives on Saturday…

    • You haven’t seen him in how long? Do yourselves a favor and get a hotel! You need the alone time!

      • 2 and a half weeks, and before that I was gone 8 days (we only got to see each other for one day between the two trips). I’ll express my needs to my family, my brothers will refuse to accommodate my needs, and then my mom will sacrifice her happiness by taking the twin beds for her and my dad, and my dad will be cranky. And if i get a hotel, my family will be angry at me. Damned if I do, damned if I don’t. But i have to prioritize my me and my husband.

        • Andie302

          That’s crappy of your brothers. They can’t switch after already having the queen for the rest of the trip? Ugh! Good for you for 1) knowing what to expect and 2) working through it in your head before addressing the situation. Could you guilt your brothers by saying something like “I really don’t want to inconvenience mom and dad, and dad will be cranky, so can you please do this for me?”

          • Sigh. Yes, it’s pretty crappy. If they do switch, it won’t be without a fight. And my mom enables it by always putting her happiness and comfort way down the totem poll. This is a constant battle – i.e. family vacation is ALWAYS in Cape May. Which takes me and my husband anywhere from 4 to 7 hours to get to and only 1-1.5 hours for the rest of the family to get to. I’m so appreciative my mom gets a shore house and invites us all but alas, every year, we end up sacrificing a lot to be here.

        • “But i have to prioritize my me and my husband.”
          You say that, but you’re spending vacation with your family? Sounds like the two of you need a vacation alone. Or am I missing something here?

          • He’s away for work and we have a family vacation in Cape May every year. He’ll come to Cape May directly from when he returns (I’ve told him he doesn’t have to and that I’d meet him at home but he’d like to). We love our family, and love Cape May, and want to spend time, but when it comes down to it, we also need to prioritize us. So trying to balance all that.
            Additionally, it’s not vacation per se. I’m teleworking while I’m here and he will be as well. We’ve got plenty of great stuff planned just the two of us.

          • UDPie, if I remember correctly, your family has a history of guilting you into spending more time with them than you really want to spend, and into doing it at their convenience (e.g., a location that’s convenient for them but requires significant travel time for you). It might be good to work on saying no to them — not all the time, but at least some of the time.

          • OK, but I still don’t understand why the twin bed thing is such an unpleasant sticking point for everyone. Is this not actually about the twin beds? Are the twin beds extremely uncomfortable or something? Is this really a struggle over family pecking order and dynamics? Having said that staying *near* but not *with* the family is a great option, regardless of the bed situation – gives you space to make more normal decisions for yourself, a little outside the direct sway of what “the family” wants to do.

          • I think the idea is that couples usually share beds and are irked by the idea of having to sleep in separate beds while on vacation.

          • Personally, I haven’t had sex in a twin bed since I was in college. Also, some of us like to cuddle our partner when we’ve not seen them for two weeks. So they could be the comfiest, nicest twin beds in the world and still be a sticking point.

  • Rant: Work is busy. And there are so crazy office dynamics going on. I just plan to keep my head down and keep plodding through the week.
    Rave: Baby Artie slept almost five hours from his 1am wake up until he woke up for the day. Thank you, Baby Artie. I needed that sleep.
    Rant: This is just such a crazy busy time of year. Just trying to hold it all together and not completely screw things up.

  • Neutral: I posted last week about people matching and then unmatching with me almost instantly on Tinder. This has now happened at least 10 times in the past two weeks or so. I got another match (first one in days!) while I was at a meeting and it was gone half an hour later when I came back. 98% of me finds this amusing and doesn’t care because Tinder, 2% of me is starting to feel somewhat inadequate….

    • Tinder is for amusement. If it’s any consolation, it looks like they find you physically attractive. Perhaps there’s something written on your profile that turns them off. Again, at least people think you’re pretty, that’s more than half the battle.

      • I agree with you on it being for amusement. Unfortunately I’ve decided that OkCupid is also a joke since I’ve been seeing the same people on there for literally years, including the people I’ve dated in the past. I don’t think anyone is serious anywhere these days…. they’re few and far between… :[

      • “Again, at least people think you’re pretty, that’s more than half the battle.”
        I hope my daughter never, ever thinks like that.

        • I’m going to put aside the judgment. When it comes to online dating, everyone is shallow, as much as people don’t want to admit it. Getting a match or right swipe is simply an indication of physical attraction and that’s all you can really hope for on Tinder. That’s what I meant, but whatever, judge my statement, sorry for trying to make someone feel a little bit better.

          • I understood you, NotABot. I think it’s just reality. And frankly, I don’t think it’s any different from the days when people met at bars, etc. You have to be attracted to someone when you see them or else you probably wouldn’t approach them in real-life either (unless you meet through mutual friends, etc.)

    • palisades

      I’m baffled that people still use Tinder

    • Are you monitoring Tinder during meetings?

      • No way! My phone was on my desk while I was in the meeting and I came back and poof! Vanished. Oh well.

    • I’ve been told that most men just swipe right on everyone and then make selections based on their matches. They could be unmatching for any dumb reason (hair color, they were only swiping while in town visiting, etc.) so try not to let it bother you! Easier said then done, though. I used to get down about it with Bumble but then became the culprit when I started dating someone. It was going well enough that I didn’t want to keep pursuing but not defined enough to delete (although I did turn my public profile to off so I was annoyed that the connections kept coming through anyway, that shouldn’t have happened). Deleting our apps was the way new boyfriend and I DTRed – modern day romance FTW.

  • skj84

    Question: Does anyone know of any DNC watch parties for tomorrow? I saw Policy is hosting one, figured there should be others.

  • Beat the heat with some cool cats and krazy kittens! – $10.00 cats and 1/2 price KITTENS! Homeward Trails is having a special adoption day this Saturday, July 30 at 4 different locations to help clear out the summer “inventory!”


    • Pic 4 (big dog with two tiny kittens) is especially cute!
      I also like pics 15 and 16 (tiny kittens snuggling with each other in a huge-for-them cat bed).

      • Yes, that’s my dog Ginger – who is great with, (although sometimes actually a little spooked/intimidated by) the foster kittens

    • Man, those are cute. I have a couple of questions for multiple pet owners – is there any way to guess whether an older cat, who has never had a companion (at least in the last 6 years) would like one? How long is the typical adjustment period? And is it true the cats have to be adopted in pairs?

      • Most rescue groups require kittens to be adopted either in pairs or to a home with a playful young cat.
        I _think_ you might be able to get Homeward Trails (or another rescue group) to test whether your older cat is OK with other cats. There are almost always cats in residence at PetMAC DC — maybe if you bring your cat there in a carrier, they can “test” him with other cats on relatively neutral ground?

      • Emmaleigh504

        WHS lets you adopt a single cat.

      • Typical adjustment period is under a week. Or at least, if they’re going to get along, they will start to adjust in a week; might take longer to become friends. So you could try a short-term foster, and if the older kitty is as aggressive at the end of as at the beginning, she’s probably happier as an only cat.

      • HT (and I think any good rescue group) will let you do a “trial adoption” to see if the new cat gets along with the resident cat. It is really an individual thing, but many solitary cats are super happy to have a companion, even after 6 years!

        I just foster kittens since I have two grown cats, but I have had 5 moms with kittens over the years, and my cats were fine with some and hated others.

        But yes – kittens need to be adopted in pairs or into a home with another young cat. They keep each other company, and it is twice the fun for you, with really not much more work.

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