Random Reader Rant and/or Revel

dc_neighborhood_news
Photo by PoPville flickr user Richard Brundage

You can talk about whatever is on your mind – quality of life issues, a beautiful tree you spotted, scuttlebutt, or any random questions/thoughts you may have. But please no personal attacks and no need to correct people’s grammar. This is a place to vent and/or celebrate things about daily life in DC.

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170 Comment

  • Quotia Zelda

    Rave: Vacation tomorrow!
    Rant: A whole bunch of stupid things I need to wrap up at work first.
    Rant: Summer work travel schedule suddenly got complicated.
    Rave?: I really would not mind if this means I didn’t have to go to Atlanta in July.

  • Rant: Migraines. 4 in the past 3 weeks. Doctor’s appointment later this week. I might be at work, but secretly, I’m dying inside.
    Rave: If I can just get through the next three days it will be the weekend.

  • Emmaleigh504

    Rave: going to Sweden tomorrow! (Burglars, if you want to steal my stuff, make sure you get the laptop, I want a new one.)

  • Rave: Extended my Hawaii trip (just one day longer, but still)!
    Rave: Had a wonderfully relaxing time over the weekend and could get used to the slower pace of life in SW VA.
    Rant: The confederate flag count from the weekend: 22. Which means I will not be moving there.
    Rant: Have to learn a hula dance for the wedding in Hawaii…

    • Yeah, the confederate flags merchandise for sale at the surf shops in Va Beach were quite disturbing.

      • Accountering

        It take’s a special kind of a$$hole to fly a confederate flag. You aren’t even a closet racist, you are just a full on racist fool.

    • Ah, yes. I had a similar experience driving through Southern Maryland this past weekend. My oldest asked me more than once if he could get out and kick some Trump signs. Cue conversation on violence never being the answer, particularly against people who most likely have guns. Feisty little Socialists I’m raising.

  • Andie302

    Rant: Friend from college has a 3yo son with down syndrome. Today he has to have a very serious neck surgery and will be in a halo for several months afterwards. Just hoping that things go as smoothly as they possibly can for both the surgery and the recovery.

  • Rant: Terrible night’s sleep. Woke up sitting bolt upright in bed 3 times due to nightmares/hearing my cats get into something/who knows why. I still feel really shaken up and completely disoriented.
    Rant: One of my cats, for an unknown reason, took a sh!t right in front of our front door. I don’t know which one did it, or why – litter box was clean, so I don’t know if it was in protest of the food they suddenly both decided to refuse to eat, or if it was a hairball/digestion issue, or what. I gave them their beloved dry food instead, and they still acted like little wretches and just picked at it and meowed like they wanted something else. I don’t have anything else to give you, you little brats!
    Rant: I am a ball of anxiety right now.
    Rave: Going to see my therapist tonight
    Rant: This is last free session my EAP covers. Now I have to research and see if my insurance will cover anything, and if so, how much, and if she accepts my insurance. Recommence anxious flipping out.
    Rant: Money, or lack thereof.
    Sorry, I’m really ranty today.

    • I really don’t mean to alarm you, but something similar happened to me years ago: woke up in the middle of the night not knowing why, cat had pooped in the middle of the kitchen floor. Something he had never done before and had no reason I could see to do then. Someone had broken in to the house. It was a crappy rental with an iffy lock on the sliding door. They left before I got downstairs, thank goodness, but made away with our passports. 🙁
      So just maybe check to make sure your doors and windows are secure? And hit up your regular doc for some anxiety meds. Or hit up your friendly neighborhood horticulturalist for some herbal relief.

      • oh man, that is crazy, WDC! I’m like m 99.9% sure that no one broke in, and that it was just one of the cats acting out, but that is ….a very interesting alarm system your cat had!! yes, I think I may need to talk to my doctor….especially if my insurance doesn’t work with my therapist….Sadly, herbal relief isn’t relief to me, it just makes me more anxious and paranoid!

  • rant: CVS. it is always so understaffed. why? it’s so ridiculous. was in such a long line yesterday because weirdly, only one person was behind the register. it’s continuous. who do i write to?! lol
    rave: my new shoes. 🙂

    • You aren’t referring to the 14th & W St CVS by any chance, are you? I don’t understand why they don’t just have some self-checkouts. Half the time I walk in I see the line and just walk right back out again.

      • actually, it’s any CVS i walk into. whether it is in DC or VA.

        The only CVS I seem to be able to get in and out of quickly is the new one by the pentagon city mall. that has self checkout lanes. so it moves pretty fast.

        if they don’t want to hire people, they should put more checkout lanes into all their stores. instead of having lines of 30+ people. :sigh: I may need to rant about this in therapy later. LOL

        • Oh weird. I’ve never had to wait in line at any of the CVS’ I’ve been to in the District EXCEPT for that one on 14th St. We must frequent different locations.

        • I don’t think self checkouts make much of a difference. The CVS I normally go to (Eastern Market) has three and there are still lines.

    • Accountering

      You speak with your dollars, and order from drugstore.com or amazon. CVS and other retailers have decided to monetize your time, by saving labor costs and letting you spend time in line. It’s a conscious decision, and your recourse is to go elsewhere.

      • It’s not just a binary of “go to CVS” vs. “order online,” though. I would recommend Target over CVS, though I acknowledge that the Columbia Heights Target is a less pleasant experience than Targets in the ‘burbs usually are.

  • Revel: My little brother is engaged
    Rant: My dad’s already on my back to throw his fiancee a bridal shower. I’ve met her once and they live in Michigan. Wtf?
    Rant: More testing. I hate this.
    Revel: I’m going to see my students from last year (different school) at their spring concert. Last time, I had one kid straight up bawling because she missed me. It’s flattering, but still…

    • Huh? Why is your dad getting involved in the bridal shower? I’d imagine there are others better placed for planning that, though you could always (if you want) see what happens and offer to throw something together if no one else does. But presumably she has friends/family who will want to plan that for her.

    • So, it’s actually considered rude for family members to throw showers for people. Technically you’d be family so that could be an angle. Unless your dad wouldn’t care. And I sense he might not if he’s willing to try to make you throw a party for someone you barely know in the first place.

      • Accountering

        Or just say you don’t feel like it is your place, and you aren’t interested in doing it.

        • or that you live like, 12 states away!

        • I responded kind of rudely to my dad, asking “why would I do that?” “it would be nice of you, you’re going to be family” “okay, well if she wants to have one in DC, I can do that, but I’m not making an extra trip to Michigan to throw a party for somebody I barely know. She probably has friends or a sister who would be better suited to do this instead” and then…nothing.

          • well that settles that, then!

          • Accountering

            I think your response was good. I wouldn’t have been rude to my dad right off the bat, but the messaging was correct. Your dad will get over it.

          • I think it’s tacky to have a shower at that age anyway. You mean to tell me a middle aged woman doesn’t already have all the towels and dishes she could possibly need?

      • +1 to Miss Manners. Carolyn Hax supports this view too re. the etiquette/lack thereof.

  • Rave: appreciating when mtpkiddo wants more nighttime snuggles. It doesn’t take too much extra time (thankfully) and I know the time will come quickly when she doesn’t want to cuddle, so I’m trying to soak it up when she does.
    Rave: mtpbaby had a pretty good night’s sleep. Second wake-up was very quickly handled with a pacifier. I think I’ve got a mental strategy for at least cutting back on nighttime feeding–though it’s hard to judge on just one night’s success.
    Rant: will be hard to get much done today
    Rave: at least it’s because of a friend’s baby shower at work. He and his wife are practically family and they’re mtpkiddo’s godparents–I’m so excited for them to have their first baby soon!
    Rant: weather feeling gross in the morning. Ugh, so not ready for this!

  • binntp

    Question for the Popvillage: Helping a family member move. Can anyone recommend a local real estate agent who has successfully negotiated the purchase of a new home based on the sale of current residence? Ideally would like to avoid taking out a HELOC to do the down payment, and use the equity from the sale (currently owns in a hot neighborhood so not too worried about current home being on market long).

    • What jurisdiction? Not the particular experience you request, but if in DC, the Mandy and David Team sold our house in 5 days for FAR more than I thought it would go for. If in Maryland, Dana Rice, now also at Compass (which appears to be taking over).
      As you a contingent sale, having the property to be sold be desirable and in a hot neighborhood helps (and probably is a prerequisite), but a lot depends on the property on which s/he’s bidding. If it is a hot property/neighborhood, it seems very unlikely that a contingent offer would be accepted unless its for substantially over asking (and other offers).

      • binntp

        Property to be sold is in DC; future jurisdiction is open, but leaning toward Silver Spring/Cathedral Heights. And actually, the properties she’s looking at aren’t necessarily “hot”–looking at older buildings including coops that are good for aging/mobility.

        • If her property is in a “hot” area, it may just be easier to sell it first, negotiate a long closing and rent-back, and then buy a place. That creates some uncertainty, but also maximizes the strength of her offer. Worst case scenario, she may need a short-term rental for a little while, though from your description of the properties she’s looking at that may not be the case. She’ll probably want to be a little farther down the buying road, though, than she is now.
          The ability to do this depends to some extent on the character of the property she’s selling. If it’s a starter home/condo, and the potential purchasers are current renters (who may have more flexibility about move-out dates) who don’t have kids (and are not concerned about getting into a property for the start of school), it’s easier. If it’s a larger move-up property likely purchased by a family, it may be more difficult (though not impossible).

          • Accountering

            I think this is a great idea – she could find a medium term rental for 45-60 days for something like $2500/month, and this would put her in the best possible position for both selling, and buying the new place.

      • I did this! We went with Bret West of McEnearney Assoc in DC and another McEnearney realtor in VA. House sold in 36 hours and transaction was fairly smooth. Settlement for both was on the same day (sale int eh morning/purchase in the afternoon). The proceeds from the sale were electronically transferred over to the new loan to cover down payment, etc. I think the wording in the offer on the purchase was something like “contingent upon sale of home” and we had up to 45 days to sell the house.

    • Accountering

      This isn’t that complicated. This is a pretty standard part of a real estate transaction. The offer is made contingent on the sale of the original property. Especially if you are buying a house in a lesser market than she currently owns in, this shouldn’t be much of an issue.

      • It is pretty standard, but the problem is that most sellers in good locations get multiple offers, so will not accept a contingent offer (if that is what OP means by “negotiated the purchase of a new home based on the sale of current residence”). I tried for a year and lost every one. I’m now selling my house and moving into temporary housing just to get the $$ out of my current home.

        • Accountering

          This is fair – only reason I am saying it’s possible is because she is moving to a less hot place. Those condos in upper Connecticut and upper Wisconsin can sit for a while. If your offer for a condo in an older building in Van Ness was contingent on you selling a condo in Dupont, I think most sellers of the less desirable Van Ness property would be willing to move forward? This wouldn’t work if you were trying to sell a Silver Spring condo and trade up to a Logan Circle condo though.

          • HaileUnlikely

            I agree with this. I live in a less-hot neighborhood and have seen homes that have sat on the market for more than a couple weeks end up accepting an offer contingent on sale of other property and then close a couple months later.

          • I’d have to agree. I sold my home in Brookland quick and the purchase of the Arlington house was contingent upon the sale. Homes in VA seem to sit on the market longer than DC and our home had a few features that make it very kid unfriendly. Our house had sat about 4 months, so owners were ok with the contingency. I would think that Maryland suburbs would be similar.

          • Brookland to Arlington… How has that been?

    • Andie302

      If I were your friend, I would try to sell my place to a buyer with some flexibility as to either the closing or move-in date. She can dictate this preference through a cover page in the disclosure package. The offer contingency for her offer at her next place isn’t going to be great, but it’ll be much less of a problem if she’s already under contract with a strong buyer and an identified closing date. Call Jenn Smira at Compass – she deals with this all the time. It’s a huge plus that your friend is looking at less “hot” properties. If that was the focus, I would say this could be a difficult position to be in.

  • Rave: PoPvillians! Thanks to everyone for the great suggestions yesterday on what to do with a car in DC for a couple of weeks. I am So. Excited.
    Rant: My cubicle neighbor talks to himself. Some days I can manage, some days I want to slap him. Earphones, I know. I use them most of the time, but I don’t like HAVING to wear them for 40+ hours a week. Small price to pay for sanity, but still. You know what would work better? IF HE JUST STOPPED TALKING TO HIMSELF.

    • Oh man, you have my sympathy. I have a cube mate who narrates her entire goddamn day. Some days are worse than others, but when it’s bad, it’s all I can do to stop myself from whirling around and screaming in her face!

  • Rave: My sister is coming to town on Friday! We may do AwesomeCon Friday evening, then are volunteering at SummerFest on Sat. Sunday we’re driving to my parents house to celebrate my mother’s birthday.

    Rave: Pics from the first Popville brunch popped up in my “on this day” feed. We need to have another brunch.

    Rant: I really need the rehearsal schedule for my next show, and it won’t fully be up until July. I’m trying to schedule my summer!

  • Rant: Work feeling like it’s going to hell in a handbasket. Good people starting to leave and the C-team’s attitude is “Good riddance,” which is a real shame.
    *
    Rave: Down just over 11 lbs in the 7 weeks I’ve been trying to take better care of myself. It feels good to get healthier and stronger.

    • Congrats on your rave! I’m in a similar boat and have never felt better.

    • What’s a C-team?
      .
      (Is the idea that the good people who are leaving are on an informal “A team” of employees?)

      • The C-suite folks – CAO, CEO. There is going to be massive amounts of turnover coming soon – two people in the last two weeks so far, more to come. I mean, we are all at-will employees so if you don’t like the way things are being run, you have a choice to either stay or go. it’s just a shame – it’s a great organization that is starting to crumble due to a new CAO’s policies and the CEO’s tacit agreement.

  • Rant: walks to work are too sweaty now.
    Rant: friends getting engaged/married are making me all kinds of anxious about being single, and is bringing back memories from my last relationship.
    Rave: going to see some of my best friends very soon.

  • Rave: Proud of myself for getting into a morning running routine. Still nowhere close to being a morning person but maybe it will come?
    Rave: My finance’s friends who love to do the whole camping/hiking/rugged thing. I love that he has other people to do that stuff with since I hate it.
    Rave: Margaritas with my best friend last night. Figuring out when to ask her to be my maid of honor.
    Rave: Reading for fun again! In the middle of “The Girl You Left Behind” and just started “All of Us and Everything”. Enjoying both.

    • @AliceInDC – Congrats on getting into the morning routine. I am trying too, but I’m not being quite as successful. Any tips?

      • Hmm. I think a big part of my motivation has been the awful evening runs I’ve had to do when I don’t wake up early enough to run in the morning. I really hate running when I’m tired after work, have eaten all day, and its so hot. So memories of those bad runs help me wake up. I also reward myself with a cookie once I get to work. That may be the real motivation… But keeping my alarm clock across the room and opening all of the blinds after I turn it off also helps.

        • Good tips, actually. The cookie part I particularly like!

          • I don’t do morning workouts, but I tell myself that if I get up 30 minutes earlier I can leave work 30 minutes earlier. And this time of year, any extra time I can spend outside gardening or reading or drinking a cocktail is a glorious thing.

        • AliceinDC is much nicer than me. When I used to run I had two motivating factors to get it done in the morning: the heat and laughing self righteously to myself at the miserable runners who were out when I was on my way home, ready to relax and enjoy the evening.
          A lot of time in the winter the wheels came off, but the heat is a great motivating factor in the summer.

          • So I sort of feel that way when I see runners after work but they are generally so much faster than me so the feeling doesn’t last long!

      • CoHi, the only way for me to have a morning routine is to actually have a real plan, not just a notion of “hey I should get up earlier and go for a run.” It doesn’t have to be a complicated plan but it has to eliminate all the easy points of failure. I know which days I’m getting up early and at what time, how far I’m running and what route – I don’t have to think about it so I can’t talk myself out of it. I make sure I have clothes to wear and breakfast handy, and anything else I need for work is gathered the night before – again, no distractions to get myself caught up in. Don’t be afraid to change it up if it’s not working – e.g. running in the park is nice but if it takes an extra 30 minutes to get there and back, it’s not going to work, find a route that begins and ends at your front door. Of course the bottom line is that you have to choose to stick to your plan, but finding a plan that works and is as simple as possible will help you do that.

    • I’m really struggling with my morning running routine. I started running in November so it’s my first experience running in the heat. I know I have to run in the morning because it will be too hot later in the day. But I really hate it. I feel tired, hungry, sluggish, and thirsty in the mornings and my runs always suffer. On weekends I have time to let myself wake up and have toast or banana before I head out, but I don’t have that luxury on weekdays. I may have to start running at night.

      • Its tough. Luckily, I run best on an empty stomach and really struggle with calorie intake as I up my mileage. Could you try a granola bar in the morning right when you wake up? Like keep it next to your bed and eat it right away? I drink at least 24 oz of water before bed which helps with the thirst in the morning.

  • RANT: Returned from my vacation to find my neighbor cut down the tree in front of the house. She got to her friends with a chain saw to cut down the tree. I am still trying to process this.

    • Her house or your house?

      • The tree was planted in a tree box, more in front of her house than mine.

        • Hm. I could be totally wrong but I didn’t think that was legal in DC. I thought that’s the city’s property and that one needed a permit of some sort?

          • HaileUnlikely

            This is true, but the regs are so convoluted that I can’t bring myself to fault a homeowner for being unaware of or misunderstanding them. There are lots of things that a well-meaning person can go onto the DCRA website for, and be told that they do not need a permit for, when the fact of the matter is that you do not need a permit from DCRA *but you do need one from DDOT.* I’m not certain of it but I suspect this may be one of those things. (I don’t have a sidewalk in front of my house and thus no trees between sidewalk and curb thus what we are talking about is not conceptually applicable to me.)

          • Accountering

            Yeah, it isn’t convoluted. You can’t cut down a tree in DC, and definitely not if it isn’t on your property.
            .
            I agree – report to 311. They should fine her pretty heavy, and it will cover the cost of DC planting another tree in the tree box. What a jerk of a neighbor.

          • But Haile neither DDOT nor DCRA would give a permit to cut down a tree in public space. It may not be well known that you need a permit to cut down a tree in private space, tree companies know this but I wouldn’t expect every homeowner to know.
            .
            Who would think it’s ok to cut down a tree in public space?

          • HaileUnlikely

            The fact that one agency will enumerate things that you need a permit for and not include it, because you don’t need it from that agency but rather from another agency, is downright absurd. I come from relatively unsophisticated stock, and have some sympathy for people who wouldn’t think to check every single agency that exists until they find one that will sell them a permit. It is quite possible that the neighbor willfully disregarded laws that they were aware of, but I think it is also quite plausible that somebody could go to the DCRA homeowner’s center website to see if they need a permit (cuz in most people’s experience doing most things, that’s where one goes to get a permit), finds no mention of trees, and assumes (incorrectly but not maliciously) that they must not need one. At the very least, the DCRA Homeowner’s Center should briefly note that certain things require permits from other agencies and link to the sites of other agencies (in this case, DDOT).

          • HaileUnlikely

            MM – Wrong. There is a permit to remove a tree in a tree box between a sidewalk and a curb. The agency that issues that permit is DDOT.

          • MM – My take: not everyone in DC realizes that the other side of the sidewalk is public space. Why anyone would cut down a tree that wasn’t dead in the first place, though, just boggles my mind. That takes a special type of unawareness/stupidity, imo.

          • HaileUnlikely

            P.S. You are supposed to be able to download the application for the appropriate permit from the DDOT website but the link, which I virtually guarantee you would not find if you did not already know where to look and what it was called, is presently broken and returns an error message.

          • Agree with Halie that I woudn’t think to check DDOT for a tree removal permit. But, agree with FridayGirl that cutting down a live tree is a head-scratcher.

          • FridayGirl, I once heard (here, I think) of someone cutting down a treebox tree because he didn’t want birds pooping on his car.
            .
            yeah, I know.

          • Accountering

            Haile – I don’t buy this in the least. No one from DC told them it was okay to cut this down. It wasn’t “convoluted” they just decided to do it without checking with anyone. They should be fined an amount equal to the value lost from the tree being gone. Trees are huge for property value, so this could easily be into the 10s of thousands. Sorry, we live in a civilized society, and you can’t just go rogue.

          • Hahaha wdc – that’s a good one, i didn’t catch that when it happened. Hahaha ughhh.

          • P.S. Googling “cutting down treebox tree in DC” yields a handful of results right at the top that all say “YOU NEED A PERMIT” so, yes, I would agree that this person just went rogue and did not care.

          • HaileUnlikely

            I honestly suspect that you are correct and that they did willfully go rogue, but my general approach to life is to start with the assumption that the offender was simply ignorant unless I see affirmative evidence that they acted maliciously.
            .
            Also, I find it massively arrogant to assume that everybody else knows everything that you know. A well-meaning person who is not particularly sophisticated in dealing with government bureaucracy could start from the baseline knowledge that “DCRA is where you get permits,” look on the DCRA website, find a list of things requiring permits that appears to intend to be comprehensive but that does not mention trees, and conclude, wrongly but innocently, that they don’t need one.
            .
            And again, you yourself are also incorrect that one cannot remove a tree on public space. You can if you apply for and are granted a permit to do so, said permit exists, and is issued by DDOT. Your permit application may be rejected, but that is another matter. And I get that the tree-cutter-downer did not get one, but that’s not my point, my point is that while the tree-cutter-downer got something wrong, so did you.

          • It was my understanding that you need a permit even if it’s on private property (and if it’s determined that there’s no good reason to remove it you need to pay a fine).

          • HaileUnlikely

            “treebox” is technical jargon. Most ordinary people who aren’t steeped in urban planning lore do not use the word treebox.

          • Sorry, Haile, I could have articulated better. I actually tend to assume that most people don’t know much of anything (myself included). But it seems like people who are more self-aware usually attempt to look into things that might be remotely questionable rather than just going ahead on a whim. Just because people aren’t malicious doesn’t mean they get a totally free pass. (For example, I never would have thought to look on the DCRA website, but searching cutting down trees in planter boxes revealed a whole bunch of DC.gov websites and brochures with all the details, right at the top of the google search.)

          • … and lastly, this is one of the silliest arguments I have ever participated in online. Removing myself from the conversation now.

          • HaileUnlikely

            It’s reasonable that you wouldn’t know where to look – I presume you haven’t gotten permits from DCRA before since you don’t own your home (nothing wrong with that, just a matter of fact). As a proud owner of a crappy house, I’ve gotten of permits, 100% of which were from DCRA. In my experience, if you need a permit, you go to DCRA. Google? What do I need that for? I know how to navigate directly to the DCRA site.
            .
            My experience with convoluted inter-agency bullsh!t actually pertained to driveway repair work, which DCRA explicitly states does not require a permit. It doesn’t simply not mention driveway repair, it lists driveway repair under things not requiring a permit. I found out later, after completing said repair, that it actually did require a permit from DDOT. Oops. Innocent mistake. In that experience, I honestly felt like DCRA went out of their way to mislead me. I know their error (which technically was not an error, they simply declare DDOT permits out of the scope of what they concern themselves with) was as innocent as mine, but come on, folks, DCRA and DDOT are agencies speaking on behalf of the government of the same city. Don’t just straight up tell me I don’t need a permit when the fact of the matter is “I don’t need one from *this agency,* but I do need one from *that agency*)

          • HaileUnlikely

            p.s. Sorry FridayGirl, my last long comment was in response to Accountering. The way the threading of comments is displayed on here did not make that clear.

          • Moon, I’m curious — how big was the tree that your neighbor cut down? Was it a sapling that DDOT had planted in the past few years, or a tree that had been there for decades?

        • Tree box = public space and absolutely illegal to take down a tree! Report to 311 (DC gov service)!!!!!

        • “It is quite possible that the neighbor willfully disregarded laws that they were aware of, but I think it is also quite plausible that somebody could go to the DCRA homeowner’s center website to see if they need a permit (cuz in most people’s experience doing most things, that’s where one goes to get a permit), finds no mention of trees, and assumes (incorrectly but not maliciously) that they must not need one.”
          .
          It’s also possible that it didn’t occur to the neighbor that a permit was necessary, period. So that would be another plausible explanation involving ignorance rather than malice.
          .
          In any event, report it to DDOT and ask for a replacement tree.

  • Rant: I went away with friends last weekend, and had an emotional meltdown while we were out drinking. It’s been a hard spring for me, and the last few weeks have been particularly stressful because I have been trying to be strong for some other friends going through some really tough stuff (I really want to be there for them, although it’s emotionally draining for me). I take ownership for the meltdown, and already apologized to everyone when I recovered. However, I can’t help feeling disappointed because my closest friend was there and didn’t make an effort to try to calm me down, or even just tell me she cared about me and that I was going to be okay. In fact, she spent a while criticizing me even after I asked her to just be supportive of me for a few minutes until I could calm down. Now I don’t trust her, and I’m afraid to even talk to her about it. I know I was the one who got emotional, but if you can’t count on your best friend to be there for you, who can you count on? I guess right now I’m just feeling very alone.
    Revel: American Ninja Warrior is back! It’s my summer guilty pleasure, and it cheered me up to see it on my DVR when I got home.
    Revel: It’s finally summertime! My commute was awesome today.

    • Andie302

      I’ve been in a similar situation when I was single and had quite a bit going on. You can treat this two ways: ignore it and move on (sounds like that will leave you with a stilted opinion of your closest friend), or bring it up in a way that the two of you can hopefully have a productive discussion. I chose the latter in the incident with my friend, and I think in the end it brought us closer. You have to remember that you were exhibiting behavior (possibly as part of your drinking) that wasn’t socially acceptable, so having some expectation for her behavior (while she was also presumably drinking) seems like a pretty tall expectation. I hope this helps!

      • Thanks Andie302. That’s really helpful to hear. And yes, I want to be clear that I was the one who behaved poorly, and then asked something from someone who was rightly upset with me. I hope I can make it more about getting to know one another’s needs and sore spots and less about blame and anger. And yes, everyone was drinking, so that didn’t help at all. I just know I can’t be perfect all the time, and I hope we can move past this in a way we can both feel good about. Right now I feel pretty crappy about all of it.

      • I agree with Andie, and think trying to have a calm, rational conversation about it could help. There’s a lot of reasons why she didn’t respond the way you thought: she could have been caught off-guard so she wasn’t able to respond appropriately; she misunderstood how upset you actually were (I’ve totally had breakdowns that were 99% alcohol-fueled and ridiculous, if she was drinking as well perhaps she didn’t really get what was going on); etc. You know your behavior wasn’t really appropriate and have apologized, but could follow up that, while it wasn’t an ideal way to express it, you’re having a rough time right now and in general could use someone to talk to.
        .
        On a side note, when you’ve been upset/stressed in the past, how did she react? The reason I’m asking is because when someone comes to me with a problem I tend to go into “let’s fix it” mode, which can sound like criticism sometimes. I don’t mean it that way, but if someone just wants to vent it’s not at all what they want to hear. Now I tend to ask what they’re looking for from me if I can’t figure out on my own.

        • Anon, thanks, and these are good things for me to keep in mind. I think what was really surprising here is that she hasn’t ever reacted this way with me. (I have also never had an angry crying fit on vacation in front of her before either.) I have, however, seen her shut down and refuse to engage with other people, but usually those people are kind of going after her. I suppose that this was one of the only times we’ve ever had a fight and I was actively upset about her behavior, rather than reacting to something shitty that happened but wasn’t her fault. There was one other time, but when we talked about it, we were sober. Maybe the problem was that in my anger about the initial thing (which was totally not her fault) I sounded like I was attacking her. That makes her actions a lot more predictable than they seemed at the time. That still doesn’t solve the whole issue, but it certainly gives me some perspective.

  • Revel: I woke up this morning married to an American citizen for the first time ever. It’s a pretty amazing feeling.
    Rave: My wife’s choice of celebration dinner: buffalo wings and champagne.
    Rant: My parents had to cancel the trip last minute as my father was in the hospital. Really hoping his kidney surgery goes okay today.

    • Accountering

      Rave: Hooray! Murica!
      Rant: Champagne is not an appropriate way to celebrate becoming an American! Perhaps California or Virginia Sparkling wine, but you can’t celebrate becoming American by drinking a French drink! 🙂
      .
      Congrats to you both!

      • Actually, I think it is appropriate because AMERICA! FREEDOM! DO WHAT YOU WANT! ETC!

        Congrats, I know that is a long, frustrating process!

      • Budweiser has changed its name to America. Not kidding.

      • Accountering

        I meant to put a smiley face. Whoops. You drink whatever you want on your first day as an American!

    • Emmaleigh504

      Congratulations on the citizenship!
      I hope your dad has a speedy recovery.

    • You know, sometimes it’s hard to forget that we are actually making a little progress in this country, despite the Trumps and Republicans of the world. I was working on a speech for a client at a prominent civil liberties organization and while I was procrastinating — sorry, doing research — I was reminded that not long ago, being an d LGBT alien was a deportable offense in the good old USA. Now they’re not only getting married, they’re getting citizenship. Kind of warms the heart. Congratulations all around and props for your determination as new ground is being broken.
      .
      So, what champagne goes with chicken wings? 🙂

  • That One Guy

    Following on the coat tails of other people’s sleep related posts: I woke up this morning with all sort of weird indentations on the right side of my body like I slept on an uneven pile of papers or Legos. How do these things happen? Also, the eczema spot on my leg started to flare up. I have no self control while I sleep so of course I scratched it and made it even more itchy.
    Rave: It feels like Monday to me but it’s actually Wednesday.

  • Rant: Middle Anonachild’s skin is flaring. This equals an extended routine of soaking bath, slathering up with various emollients, wrapping affected areas, dosing with meds, and just hoping she doesn’t scratch at night. I am so, so hoping we can get it under control. She is incredibly anxious about starting at a new school where she has to explain all over again what is up with her skin. I feel so bad that her anxiety is already going into over-drive about it.
    Rant: PM at the new place sends a text at 10 saying we will have duct cleaners there between noon and 4. One, we never knew there were duct cleaners scheduled to come in, and two, I really don’t like the idea of people just randomly being in the house without one of us there. If anything, the dogs will go will go nuts! Ugh!

  • Rave: Planning a vacation!
    Ran/rave: trying to maximize miles for business class flights to europe!

    • I just had a rude awakening – I was excited to use miles for tickets to Paris, then when I went to complete the transaction there were $500 total in taxes (OK, I can live with that) and more that $500 FOR EACH TICKET in carrier fees (thanks, British Airways!). So, my “free” tickets would cost more than $2000. Sorry, no. And of course, the options that don’t involve the carrier fees don’t have the same reward classes available, and we don’t have enough miles for them. Aargh.

      • Wow. I would’ve expected high taxes for an international flight, but I too wouldn’t have anticipated carrier fees.
        .
        On the other hand, I’ve never used any of my miles, so there’s probably a lot that I wouldn’t expect.
        .
        I need to start using my miles (from United). Right now I have to fly United every 18 months to keep them from expiring.

        • The same could be accomplished with a United credit card. Every purchase resets the clock. You also can get a heap of bonus miles.

          • Next time you’re shopping online just go through the MileagePlus shopping portal (or, if it’s Amazon, use the MileagePlusX app). Half my United miles are from shopping not flights!

          • Good to know — I had a United mileage credit card for a year but gave it up after that point, since the miles it earned weren’t eligible for Premier status. (This was when Premier status got you a free upgrade to Economy Plus seating, which is no longer the case.)

          • Does anyone know if there’s a similar shopping portal for American on Amazon? That would be great!

        • If you’ve budgeted for regular travel you take, and have a decent amount of miles, think about saving them for a big trip overseas. Business class tickets to Europe and especially Asia are wonderful, wonderful things.

          • There probably is. I’ve used this method to keep my miles on British Airways from expiring. Go to American and click on “earn miles” and it should take you there.

  • RANT: my moto g (3rd gen if it matters) mysteriously claims to have 4GB of internal storage used up (not counting the operating system), but the list of apps, photos, etc only account for 2GB or so. Not sure what’s up with the missing 2GB of space. The online chat support claims the only way to investigate further is to do a factor reset. WTF???

    • I’m not familiar with this phone, but can you get the CCleaner app to run an analysis and clean out any gunk? I do this periodically to get all the browser cache, temp files, old image files, etc. out of my phone and it always frees up a TON of space.

      • I’ve never heard of the CCleaner app–I tried clearing out the cache manually; does the app go beyond that?

        • I’m not sure about the browser cache but it certainly does other temporary files beyond browser stuff. I’ve found the most random crud in my phone before. Now I clean it out every week or so.

        • Crap, didn’t work. Only found 3.5MB to clean out.

    • That One Guy

      Emails and their related attachments?

      • Hrm, there’s a thought. I’ll see what happens if I change the sync to keeping a smaller number of emails.

  • Question for the Masses – anybody ever been successful at getting a full refund from airbnb? Little backstory – we booked a place for the previous weekend, I got devoured by bedbugs the first night, so we switched to a new place (after taking all the precautions to not bring them to the next place with us). Ended up having to get a super-expensive place, bc it was memorial day weekend and hardly anything was available. Initially they were quick to help with the transfer, but it ended up costing 100 dollars more total for the two nights at the new place than it initially was going to cost us for 3 nights at the old place.
    They’ve cut me off on the phone twice after having me on hold for 15 minutes each time. I’ve been extremely diplomatic thus far considering it basically ruined my weekend. I’m about ready to go nuclear. Anybody have any experience with this?

    • Accountering

      My AirBNB in NYC cancelled on me last minute, it was 4 BR place for a weekend last November. The new place was $1400 more for the long weekend. AirBNB gave me a $1200 credit after working with them on the phone for several hours. Keep calling.

    • Andie302

      Maybe angry tweet them? They seem sensitive to their public persona!

      • That was going to be my response. Either tweet at them or try their Facebook page. Every time I’ve had an issue with Uber they usually respond faster to tweets than emails/phone calls.

    • I once got to an airBnB later than expected (the host was aware, and extremely accommodating), but when we got to the house, there wasn’t any running water. No one answered their phones that night or before we left the next morning to try to offer us an alternate solution. AirBnB and the host were both pretty quick to refund us.

      • HaileUnlikely

        That is extremely strange. Was this squarely the fault of the host, or was there an area-wide water outage due to unscheduled utility work?

  • Rave: I got a new camera for my trip.
    Rant: It doesn’t quite fit into the case for my old camera. The camera store I used to go to closed. Anyone know of a good camera store where I can go check out cases?

    • I would just order a few online (B&H or Amazon), pick out the best one, and send back the rest.

  • Rave: It seems like Washington Post is just trolling Popville for their next big story. See today’s about the Lyft driver/ congressional tags. This is probably the third or fourth time in a month that I am reading an article in the post that first came up on Popville…

    • The Post has to go through more of a process before they can publish a story, so it’s not surprising that there’s some lag.

    • NBC Washington does the same thing, I think. I also noticed that DCist and Capital Weather Gang routinely use PoPville’s photos for posts later the same day….

      • That’s because most people who share on Flickr share the same photo to both groups.

        • I always though it was funny not that they use the same photos, though, but that they literally all use the same photos the same day each day. (like, switch it up, y’all!)

          • Maybe they just happen to choose the same photos? Or everyone chooses the most recent photo of Subject X and therefore they all end up with the same photo?

          • The weather ones are somewhat time-sensitive though. Like it wouldn’t be appropriate to use a shot from two weeks ago today. CWG probably had fewer to work with because they’re restricted to weather-related, whereas PoPville photos could be of anything. And everyone wants to have the strongest images they can get, even if they’re repeats!

    • That One Guy

      There was also the veteran who had his bag taken.

      • Did that end up in the Post?
        .
        I think Sylvia Robinson (Georgia Avenue activist) was very active in forwarding the guy’s message to lots of listserves, etc., so the Washington Post might’ve obtained the story independently of PoPville.

    • HaileUnlikely

      I have been noticing this too. I don’t think it’s a recent development. The first time I noticed it was in Post coverage of a story first reported here of a bunch of pedestrians walking by a “professionally-dressed” unconscious woman in front of the Shaw library during the morning rush hour. Since then, three or four of their local reporters have been sourcing material from here fairly often.

  • Two weeks ago, I got a package in the mail that had obviously been torn and the content emptied. I have a security camera because of the number of issues with the postal service I have had, and it was delivered in that state. I went to the Brentwood office and showed a supervisor. She asked to take the packaging to investigate. She said it should have at least been marked contents damaged if delivered. Yesterday, I got the same package in the mail again.

    Here is a blog of my Brentwood USPS junk. myuspsproblem.tumblr.com

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