Random Reader Rant and/or Revel

Photo by PoPville flickr user Blink Ofanaye

You can talk about whatever is on your mind – quality of life issues, a beautiful tree you spotted, scuttlebutt, or any random questions/thoughts you may have. But please no personal attacks and no need to correct people’s grammar. This is a place to vent and/or celebrate things about daily life in DC.

315 Comment

  • Emmaleigh504

    Unofficial HH at Southern Hospitality tomorrow! theme: hats!

  • Rave. The last thing I heard from the street last night before I turned on my air filter and went to bed was someone saying “thank you.”

  • Emmaleigh504

    Rant: I cannot get my airplane adorned hat to stay on my head without the airplane falling off. #DYIfail
    Rant: bad night for sleep.
    Rave: commence the 12 Days of Sarah.

  • Rant: Earworm of the Paramore song Ain’t It Fun
    Rant: I am in the worst mood I can remember in a LONGGGG time
    Rave: This too shall pass (eventually)
    Rave: In the interim, I SHOULD be able to manage not to scratch anyone’s eyes out.
    Rave: Heading to Memphis tomorrow for a long weekend. Anything we shouldn’t miss while there? Should we go to Graceland?

    • Emmaleigh504

      Yes you should go to Graceland!!! Why is that even a question?! #TheKing

    • Emmaleigh504

      Also, if you need to scratch anyone’s eyes out, I have some candidates.

    • I thought the Civil Rights Museum at the Lorraine Motel was fantastic, then Central BBQ is right around the corner.

      Sun Records is an interesting stop if you don’t want to venture out to Graceland, but still get a peak into the music scene.

      I’m not sure if it’s still open but Revival brewery was a fun stop. It’s in an abandoned warehouse near the Arts District.

      • The Civil Rights Museum is amazing and an absolute must.

        The Peabody Hotel Ducks are touristy, but cute.

        Also, Irving Steete mentioned the Stax Museum, which I didn’t see and seriously regret. There’s a fantastic documentary about Stax Records on Netflix that I highly recommend.

    • Sorry to hear about the bad mood! Hope you feel better soon, and have fun in Memphis!

    • Ahh, everybody goes to Sun Records. If you want to be really badass, go to the Stax Musum. Prep for the visit (and work on your unfortunate mood) by listening to Stax recording sensation Otis Redding’s Happy Song https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zdBsLo6P9-U
      Also: barbecue.

      • Accountering

        Oh, there will be barbecue….

        • So I have to say, the Memphis style bbq was not my favorite. The flavor is really great, but I was not feeling the dry rub thing. I asked for sauce and the woman looked at me like I had lost my ever loving mind. Still worth trying though.

      • saf

        We went to both – and both were worth it.

        Also Graceland, the Museum of Rock and Soul (good, but not great), and BBQ.

  • Rave: FINALLY feeling back to normal! I feel like a fog has been lifted from my brain. It was super, super annoying and I was really starting to irritate myself with my inability to think and process. Already things feel much better. I
    Rave: Thanks everyone for your doctor suggestions yesterday. I’ve found a doctor at Hopkins who specializes in antibiotic allergies in addition to food allergies, and as soon as my employer and insurance get their shit together, I will be scheduling an appointment. Hoping to figure out wtf is wrong with me to avoid any future issues.
    Rave: Things are coming together for my side job. Yay for extra money! I’m going to need it for that ER visit…
    Rant/Rave: My mother. I just can’t even. However, her shittiness in this whole situation has really shown me how awesome my BF and BFF are.

  • Rant: Found a big, deep scratch on the hardwood floor this morning. I don’t even know how/when it happened! It’s probably from that stupid piano…
    Rave: That adorable bunny-eating-thistle photo that’s been going around the interwebs. Makes me giggle every time I see it.

    • Try running a walnut into the scratch. It obviously won’t get rid of it, but it will make it much less noticeable. Also: character. Your floor has character.

      • Uhmm, I swear I typed “rubbing”, but if you’re able to get walnuts running, might as well try that as well.

      • Only if your floors are stained dark brown. (Been there, done that.) Use a lighter nut if your floors are light.

    • I Dont Get It

      There are markers in many different shades in the stain aisle at HD. You can probably find an exact match.

  • Rant: Renting out a room in my place. (Went with $1800 – all utilities included plus pets allowed and cleaning service 1x/month)
    Rave: Got the ad up on craigslist, sent it out to colleagues and friends. Now to wait… it’s a bad season to be looking for a roommate.
    Any suggestions on other places to post?
    Rave: Had a beautiful ride at the barn last night with a good friend and a great pony.
    Rant: Missed the USMNT and the debate – we caught snippets of it on the radio and then when we stopped to grab dinner…

    • Additional Rant: Family moratorium on reminiscing about past events that didn’t involve brother’s current wife. So I’m not allowed to bring up our family trip to Hawaii or a memorable outing together because he did it with an ex girlfriend? Why are we supposed to moderate our memories and our enjoyment of them because of who they were with? He was perfectly fine with talking about those memories before this wife so why the moratorium and delicacy?

      • It sounds like current wife could be deeply insecure about your brother’s life prior to her. You are probably nicer than I am, but I would probably allude to those events on purpose. #notaniceperson

        • Emmaleigh504

          I would totally accidentally on purpose bring up stories from before her time. When my dad gets around his sisters he and the older sister like to talk about all the fun they did before the youngest was born. So I come by it naturally.

        • Yeah, me too. “Oh, gosh, you remember that sunburn you got . . . oh . . . never mind.”

      • An actual moratorium? Seriously??
        Did your brother request it and everyone else is playing along?

      • Wow. This is kinda crazy. To be perfectly honest, as someone who has been divorced, and is in a serious relationship with someone who is also divorced, you cannot hide from the past. Ever. Trying to pretend it didn’t exist is just ridiculous and is not the sign of a healthy person or relationship.

        • Accountering

          Agree. I am in a similar situation, and have just changed all of these memories to exclude my ex. I still did all of these cool things, they are just now things that “I” did. That is kind of nuts to try and force this rule on the whole family. Is my family just supposed to pretend like our awesome trip skiing to the Austrian Alps just didn’t happen, because my ex was included?

          • I was with my ex for 7 years, my BF was with his for 12. Our happiest memories (namely, the births of our children) literally cannot be separated from our respective exes. I have also do the whole elimination of my ex from my memories thing, but my ex wasn’t a very present individual so it’s easy. For my BF, I don’t think that’s really possible. They had a pretty much amicable split, and they have a relatively healthy co-parenting relationship. So she comes up. I can either chose to completely disbelieve my BF when he tells me there is nothing there, they are over etc and see this as him wistfully remembering the past as a direct insult to me and our relationship, or I can choose not to be a crazy bitch and value my relationship and my BF. The SIL has this same choice.

          • This is the way we used to do it pre new SIL – and he was totally ok with it! So I guess that leads me to believe it’s coming from the SIL.

      • Wow. I mean, I could understand a moratorium on stories that started with “remember that great trip we took when you were with [insert name of ex]”, but all past memories – that is beyond controlling. What if you’re at [insert holiday] and it brings up a memory of a childhood holiday, are you no longer allowed to reminisce about that?

        I’ll go one farther than artemis – it sounds like current wife could be controlling/veering into emotionally abusive. Trying to control what you think and alienate you from your friends and family is a red flag.

      • Yup–sounds like the wife’s issues. I was friends with an ex until he got engaged to someone else (a mere 13 months after I broke up with him, but that’s another story)–but once they got engaged, he dropped off the face of the planet and even refused to interact to deal with the handoff of course materials for a class I was taking over for him. Not “allowing” family to talk about past holidays, vacations, etc from pre-wife time period is a whole other level of crazy though!

      • Yeah, I’m evil enough that I’d be there with art and Em sapping stories. Possibly embellishing them.

        • Emmaleigh504

          totally embellishing them. The ex would become a hero.

          • “Do you remember that time when Brother’s ex-girlfriend saved Sparkie the dog and the family china from that terrible fire at our lake house? Amazing bravery. And she always had the best hair.”

          • I Dont Get It

            Love it artemis!

          • “remember how the two of you used to disappear in the middle of the afternoon and come back for cocktails with those silly grins on your faces?”

        • i love all these fake stories! they make me laugh. probably because my ex-husband remarried years ago but my mother in law refuses to take down any pictures with me in them.

          • Oh god, this reminds me. On the last visit to my BF’s mom’s house I noticed pictures missing out of collages picture frames. I thought it was odd, and then it dawned on me that they must have been pics of the ex. I *really* hope she didn’t do that on my account!!

        • Bahahaha – this is fabulous. Thanks for the dose of evil. I’ll be hanging with them this weekend…let me see what happens 😉

      • The crazy/insecurity is strong with your SIL. Yikes.

      • Wow – left for a meeting and came back to this!
        I don’t know if it’s the SIL or my mom or my bro…I heard the moratorium from my mom. He’s had some really rough relationships but our family always talked about the good times (not highlighting the who they were with obviously…), awesome trips, etc. SIL is new (met, engaged, bought house, pregnant, married, and baby all in one year) so I don’t know her well. How do i find out who it’s coming from and how to move beyond it?
        But I do love the ex becomes the hero ideas! I’m not going to pussyfoot around our family memories just because they took place with someone in our past. I won’t highlight the ex but seriously, to remove those memories from our conversations, etc. is not acceptable.

        • The only “moratorium” that would make sense is not to have long, extended conversations that the sister-in-law can’t possibly participate in. (I’m thinking of when I went to lunch with a friend of mine and two (local) friends of hers from grad school. The friends — who were big-time socially inept — kept talking about nothing but their shared grad-school experience.) But that’s just good manners, and certainly doesn’t mean that past trips, experiences, etc. shouldn’t be mentioned. It’s weird to pretend like something didn’t happen just because it involved an ex.

    • If you’re near any schools, they usually have a housing site or fb group.
      I got lots of interest but only saw a few people. Also look at the housing wanted ads on craigslist.

    • Try some apps as well – Zillow Rentals, RadPad, etc.
      I believe there are also some housing resources/forums for World Bank and IMF employees. See if you can list through those. They are always looking for furnished rentals for 3 to 12 month periods (short term employment contracts)

    • Be glad that you missed the USMNT. Dreadful.

      • They’ve been playing like crap. I’m sorry you had to suffer through it.

      • I thought it was an amazing game to watch. Sure, we lost in a heartbreaking fashion, but great game nonetheless – beats losing in PKs. (Also, I can’t honestly say we deserved a win there either, but at least we showed some heart at the end.)

        • Agree that US v Mexico was an amazing game to watch. I’m pretty sure that UDPie was talking about US v Costa Rica friendly last night. That was horrendous.

        • I think they’re talking about last night’s loss to Costa Rica in a friendly – sounds like you’re talking about Saturday’s game against Mexico?

        • Haha, sorry – I guess I kind of compartmentalized USMNT after Saturday’s loss and completely forgot about the game last night. (I was also fully engaged in the dabate, so everything else kind of fell off the radar.) I’ll have to watch a recap tonight, though it sounds like I better skip it altogether.

    • I put mine on Zillow and hotpads too. We got a lot of hits through hotpads. I will say the most annoying/flakiest people came from Zillow. Also some rando kept texting me offering to buy my house whole sale.

      • Eh, I think it’s a crap shoot with any online service. We found our current place on Zillow Rentals – the owner had three completed apps on the first day she did a public showing of the apartment as it was good location, great condition, and slightly priced under-market. We got it, as we completed our app first and had the highest income. In this case, Zillow worked great for our landlord.
        If the place is priced right, you’ll get a lot of serious interest very quickly. If you’re “stretching” on the price, be prepared to deal with more BS and time wasting.

  • Rave: They finally turned the AC down at work so I’m no longer freezing.
    Rant: Buying expensive plane tickets that have been insanely overvalued for the holidays.

    Question: Where could a small writing group meet in the Dupont/Adams Morgan/U Street area? Someplace where they wouldn’t mind us hanging out for a couple hours, with outlets available.

  • Rave: Florida bound for my friends wedding next week! I hope the weather behaves.

    Rant: I set up my rent payment through my banks bill pay option. It never seemed to process, which was worrisome. After calling my bank I find out they mailed my rent as a check to the leasing office!Since it was my first payment with billpay and my bank didn’t recognize the leasing company. I didn’t know it was going to be sent as a check. My landlord didn’t know to look out for a check. I hope to goodness it hasn’t been mixed up in the mail.

  • Rant: The internet recipes right now…Okay you guys — I am making pot roast in a crock pot for like 12 people this weekend. All I really need to do is season the pot roast, add beef broth, spices and potatoes and carrots and onions and garlic and let it go, right? Some of the recipes I’m finding online seem ridiculously involved for a crock pot situation.

    Rave: Going bowling with my firm tonight…and it’s jeans day!

    • When I make crock pot roast beef, I season the meat and sear it (very important!), place it on a bed of potatoes, carrots, onion, and maybe a cup or two of beef broth. You can add more or less depending on how wet you want it. Also, you can add fresh herbs if you want more of an herby flavor.

      • Don’t the potatoes cook to mush? Maybe there’s some crockpot magic I don’t know about– never used one. But whenever I do a roast, I put the potatoes/ carrots in after the meat has already cooked a while.

        • I haven’t done a pot roast, but I have made meatloaf on a bed of potatoes, and the potatoes go in underneath the meatloaf. They are soft, but not mush–but there’s no liquid added so they are just cooking in the fat that drains off the ground turkey or beef.

          • I have never done a crockpot meatloaf, but that sounds interesting, and I make a killer meatloaf. Is it the same basic recipe, just cooked in the crockpot over the potatoes?

          • I think basically yeah–cook on high for one hour, and then low for 6-7 hours for a meatloaf with 2 pounds of meat.

          • I will try it! I’m cooking for eight a few days next week, so I need to increase my recipe sizes.

          • Cooking for eight? Wow! Btw–if you need new recipe suggestions, particularly for larger groups, I have a great cookbook called “Make Ahead Meals Made Healthy” or something along those lines. The recipes are larger because they’re intended to be easily frozen to pull out later. I’ve only tried a handful of the recipes, but we’ve really enjoyed the ones we’ve made.

          • Well, seven is the norm, so eight isn’t so bad lol. I will check that cook book out, thank you!

          • Ah, not a big change then. I always cook with leftovers in mind–I can’t imagine how big my recipes would need to be for those numbers regularly. I tip my cap to you! 🙂

        • It depends on the kind of potatoes you use and how you prepare them. The best potatoes to use are baby potatoes or red potatoes whole. They become this amazingly creamy, buttery consistency. However, cut up potatoes are in danger of becoming mushy.

    • If you want to get fancy, brown the pot roast before crocking it. But other than that, your instincts are spot on. No need to make it harder than it is!

    • Emmaleigh504

      All I do is sear the meat and dump it into some water and soy sauce and onions.

    • I usually do my pot roast in a dutch oven, but if I were using a crockpot, I’d season and sear the meat, then put it in the crockpot. Then, I’d saute the onions and carrots for a bit in the pan juices. Then, add some chopped garlic. If you have some tomato paste add that too. Then, add a few glugs of red wine. Let it simmer for a bit until the alcohol cooks off. Add a can of tomatoes. Dump it all in there with the meat and let it cook. Like wdc, if I was going to add potatoes at all, I’d do it more towards the end.

  • Rave/rant: Still have work to do on this project which we all dislike. Getting to fix someone else’s mistakes. Ugh!
    Rave: Full fun week.
    Rave: Lease signing tonight.
    Rant: Online dating! Only ppl who show an interest aren’t my type or in Europe.
    Rave: At least I’m getting liked. That’s something, right?

    • Congrats on the lease! Pretty sure that’s a lot of people’s experience with online dating. More nopes than yes but when you meet a good yes, you gotta go for it. Being liked is good but even better when it’s mutual.

    • Congrats on the lease! You put a lot of work into it – so good on you!

  • Rant: I slept like crap last night.
    Extra Rant: First night sleeping with the Snoogle. I don’t know if this is coincidence or if it just takes awhile to adjust to the body pillow.
    Rave: First prenatal yoga class ever. It makes me realize how out of shape I have gotten since I got pregnant. The stretching felt good though!

    • The snoogle interrupted my sleep more than helping it for a long time, but I finally caved when my hip & back pain got bad enough. I think it may just take some time & experimentation to see how it helps the most/disrupts the least. FWIW, when I roll over, I don’t re-position it–so it’s along my back when I’m on my left side & along my front when I’m on my right side. I just reposition my legs as needed (including knees over the bottom of it when I’m on my back) That seems to help with not needing to wake up/move around as much when I do change positions overnight. Good luck on the sleep front–pregnancy exhaustion is no joke!

    • I simultaneously love and hate the snoogle. It helps me to sleep on my side (I’m a life-long back sleeper) but dear god, it makes me overheat like nothing else. It’s also so large that we had to give it a formal name since it’s the same size as another human.

  • Rave: Beautiful morning, feeling like I’m getting stuff done.
    Rant: Yesterday I got surprise-attacked by a street sweeper – accidentally inhaled soooo much dust and dirt and pollen and street sh!t. My lungs hurt and I swear to god the left one is crackly. I don’t have any fluid in my lungs as far as my roomie (who is a nurse) can tell, but it may just be super irritated far down in my bronchial tubes. Grr.
    Rave: Had a great evening last night hanging out with my roomie and watching Netflix and laughing – she’s been pretty sick and has had a hard time eating so I made her whatever she was craving, with lots of good protein. Hopefully she’ll be on the mend soon.
    Rant: Migraine auras on my way to work. Took medicine and it seems to be keeping it at bay, fingers crossed.
    Rave: HH tomorrow!

  • Rave: Someone finally returned our recycling bin! It has all their recycling in it haha. I was so excited to see it when I get home yesterday!
    Rant: Have to go get fingerprints at MPD on 300 Indiana Ave today. Has anyone done this? Seems easy enough, but I am skeptical.

    • Do you have to go there? I went to a place on I st I think. In and out in 5 mins; $10/card
      It’s the only 5 star place if you search yelp for fingerprinting.

    • Should be a very simple process. Depending on what you need them for. DC requires fingerprinting for a lot of different types of professions, so they have come a long way in their process.

    • Glad to hear your recycling bin is back! If it doesn’t have your house number on it already, now would be a good time to add it (since your renters will probably be less vigilant about this kind of thing than you’d be).

      • Yeah, we’re going to spray paint it for sure!! Our trash can is already spray painted with our house number.

        • I Dont Get It

          Address number stickers that you can get at Home Depot look much neater unless you are a spray paint artist. Random stickers also help (I used Panda stickers). .

          • I originally tried address number stickers from Home Depot, but they peeled off after a while. 🙁

          • I Dont Get It

            Probably I’m overly sensitive to this. On my block the trash cans are stored in front of the house so I think it looks odd to have in front of someone’s carefully maintained house and well-groomed yard a trash can with an address sloppily sprayed in with red paint.

          • Ours are in the back alley, but maybe I will use some unique stickers and try to make it look nice/cool! 🙂

          • Blithe

            Indelible marker? Indelible marker + stencil? Indelible marker + stencil + random stickers? I’m sure that I’d be tempted to go with a glitter pen.

          • Some alley neighbors of mine used spray paint with a stencil and it looks very nice. (I’m a little envious.)

          • I Dont Get It

            Maybe I’ll Beadazzle them next time!

          • saf

            Textdoc – do you want to borrow the stencils?

  • Question: Can anyone recommend a general physician for my husband? Extra points if they are downtown near Farragut West. He just needs a doctor to do a regular yearly checkup and his old doctor now has a yearly fee.

  • justinbc

    Rave: Debate was great last night. With only 5 people instead of the Republicans 11 you actually get to talk about substantive policy issues (not that the GOP would have necessarily focused on those even with smaller numbers, but you get the point). Sanders’ looked great, and most importantly gave up zero ground to Webb, O’Malley, and Chafee.
    Rant: I only have a handful of educated Republican friends who openly discuss politics, and I’m curious how the other party views the Democrat debate. Any folks out there willing to share their opinions on how you saw it here?

    • Accountering

      Communism, socialism, anti-freedom, healthcare takeover, anti-jobs, baby-killers, and they are trying to take my guns!

    • Accountering

      Sanders did look good, and most importantly, he has apparently realized that his poor ratings among minorities are his Achilles heel. He seems to be trying to rectify this, which is his only chance to make this race competitive.
      I think Hillary was the clear winner last night though.

      • justinbc

        His poor ratings among minorities is based heavily on their ignorance of his actual record and understanding of the candidates’ policy positions. I think he did a lot to rectify both of those. To be fair, it’s not as though the majority of white voters are substantially more informed, but they will view him in a slightly less biased light when polled. And to be honest, those poll numbers aren’t really all that relevant, since both Iowa and New Hampshire are predominantly white, and generally get to set the stage for how things will play out.

        • It also has to do with the disparate treatment he received from Black Lives Matter vs. what Hillary received. She was never interrupted, made to deal with BLM in an unscripted way or approached as aggressively as Sanders was.

          • justinbc

            Oh for sure, but that treatment stems from the lack of understanding and misconception as one of the “old white guy” guard that Hillary wouldn’t be subject to.

          • Actually, the “treatment” that the candidates received was a direct result of the level of access the BLM folks had at the various events. And not some “old white guy” subordination that you just made up. The access at the Hilary events was more restricted.

          • @anon 12:33: Maybe it’s an access issue, but the questioning at Hillary’s event was much more respectful and restrained than anything Sanders has gotten. Hillary has not been slammed as being weak on race as Sanders has been and Sanders is the only one who’s been interrupted more than once. It’s hard to argue that Sanders isn’t being treated more severely by BLM than any other candidate, despite their assertions they they will be holding all candidates accountable.

    • Accountering

      The most interesting thing to me was how little material there is for the fact checkers. Back here on earth, the Democrats seems to enjoy telling the truth and using facts, which is much more than we can say about Donald Trump and the rest of the clown car.

      • justinbc

        That’s also a result of a smaller field. It’s easier for the moderators to address things directly, rather than just letting people say silly shit and having to immediately move on.

        • Accountering

          Meh, the republicans get called on it, and just glaze past it. Fiorini is still sticking to the “Pants On Fire” lie of the tapes of the fetus on the table nonsense, and Trump has so far gotten away with a tax plan that will add 10 trillion to the debt over 10 years.

    • I’m not a Republican, but I agree, it was a good debate. Sanders was the most impressive to me. He sounded reasonable and knowledgeable about the issues and defended his positions well to the critics. Hillary did better than I expected, but I didn’t think that she was particularly forthcoming on every topic or successful in addressing the political expediency criticism.

      O’Malley, Chafee and Webb were just trying to get anyone to care that they were running and were not successful. The whining about not getting more screen time was especially desperate.

      • justinbc

        The whining by Webb was really sad. Like, the first time, OK, we get it, but you have to understand you’re on a TV show playing to an audience that is going to focus on the front runners. The 2nd, 3rd, 4th time, c’mon man.
        I thought Hillary definitely played the “first woman President” card a lot more than I remember Obama doing it with “first black President”. Maybe because it’s less polarizing?

        • Accountering

          Webb was ridiculous. When Anderson Cooper has to smack you back in place twice for complaining, you have gone too far. I hope he is excluded from the next debate tbh. I don’t see much reason to keep Chafee around either – the guy was horrible.

        • I thought she sounded almost desperate by repeatedly interjecting “us women voters” into many topics where it seemed rather unnecessary. Is she really that insecure about getting the woman vote? (Though I guess an argument could be made that it was directed more towards Republican viewers, but still.)

          • Accountering

            I didn’t pick up desperation there, just smart politics – this is one of her core groups, and if she can peel off suburban moms (she is going after them hard with the gun control etc) that would be huge.

          • justinbc

            I didn’t think it was as bad as her repeatedly saying “God given something”.

    • From everything I’ve read, most conservative media pundits thought Clinton was the best, by a long shot.

      • Of course – what conservative pundit in their right mind would side with an angry socialist Jew? (The other candidates were obvious non-starters, aside from maybe OMalley oh so desperately pining for Hillary’s VP nod.)

        • Accountering

          Interesting bit on OMalley for VP. I think Warner from VA gets it. That would lock up VA for Hillary, and then she just needs to win a couple of the other swing states and she is president.

          • I predict that she’ll pick a minority as VP, either African American or Hispanic. Democrats win when minorities come out in force, and she is unlikely to inspire the same turnout as Obama did.

          • Accountering

            Fair enough. Perhaps someone from Florida or Ohio. Winning either of those states gets her the presidency as well 🙂
            Based on her popularity with African Americans, I don’t think she needs a black VP to GOTO there, but could see a hispanic VP allowing her to run up even larger margins and higher turnout among that group, which again, would guarantee her the presidency.

          • Research (that I can’t find right now, sorry) indicated that the home state of the VP doesn’t have an impact on the candidate winning that state.

          • Yes, but what gets you Florida and Ohio is voter fraud.

    • I’m just annoyed that Bernie Sanders gave Hillary a free pass on the emails. Yes Bernie, we should be talking about her emails, what she did was shady as hell. As a Democrat, I’m having a hard time voting for her for this reason alone, and I’m tired of people trying to downplay it. If this was a member of the opposite party, we would be demanding justice. I’m just sick of the hypocrisy of politics. Pure BS.

      • Really? I’m much more concerned about her bedside manners with Wall Street than I am by the email herring.

      • I read Sanders’s comment as meaning “Can we stop talking about this non-issue? And get back to talking about real issues like income inequality, healthcare for women, campaign finance, etc.?” We can pay attention when the Justice Department or the State OIG brings Hillary up on charges.
        That totally aligns with Sanders’s rhetoric. Way too much of modern political discussion is obsessed with non-issues that have no effect on citizens’ day-to-day lives.

        • My impression was a little different in that I heard his statement in the context of campaign finance reform – “why bother with her emails under investigation when we know she’s in bed with corporate interests?” But I may also be inclined to read additional snark into things…

          • +! That’s how I interpreted it too! God I wish Sanders could somehow magically win the White House!

      • But Colin Powell admitted a few weeks ago that he also used a personal email server. Bush & Cheney got caught deleting 20,000 emails from a server at the RNC. This is obviously a problem, just not one that should be pinned solely on Secy. Clinton.

        • Yes, and Colin Powell should be held under the same scrutiny, the same with Bush and Cheney. A Secretary of State or any public servant should not be using their personal server for official business. It’s shady. You really can say it’s a non-issue, this just shows who we’re dealing with – someone who thinks the rules do not apply to them…

      • This really is a non-issue for me. I think it is a partisan attempt to discredit her and drive her poll numbers down when others did the same thing.

      • The email thing is less an issue for me on principle-lots of politicians do it. My issue is that someone as scrutinized as Clinton is should have known that this would be a problem. The fact that she didn’t makes me think she won’t have the good judgement to avoid these sorts of self inflicted wounds in the future.

  • Rave: Finalizing our counter offer on a condo! It’s a great building in an ideal SF location. I never thought we’d get something so good so quickly.
    Rants: It needs a lot of work (eventually — it’s more than livable as-is) and our move-in date is uncomfortably close to my due date. I’ve had about five panic attacks about this already, but ultimately think it’s worth the stress. Most of the time.
    Rave: The reflux meds are totally working.

    • Fingers crossed on everything coming through with the condo!

    • This is SUPER exciting! Glad the meds are working, and just remember that the babies won’t recall the chaos…so just do what you can and don’t beat yourself up! Easier said than done, I know.

    • Good luck! Hopefully moving won’t be as stressful as you fear, in fact, being in a permanent place may actually help It’s all about perspective 🙂 Also, if it helps, I only bothered setting up a nursery for one kid. If you need advice on minimalist newborn prep, let me know!

      • Thanks! This is our plan too — one of everything unless there is a demonstrated need for two or more of something. I don’t plan to buy a thing until after we move. It’s all about editing (down) the Amazon wish list at this point!

    • Ooh, good luck!! 🙂

    • Very cool on the condo & so glad that the reflux meds are working! As for the proximity of the move-in date to the due date, one way or another things will work out. Make contingencies to a reasonable extent, but then just take deep breaths. yay for finding something great so quickly!

    • Blithe

      Reading your rant reminded me of an article I read recently — on NPR?– about a Chinese custom that Mom and baby don’t go out for 30 days after the birth, so there are hotel-spas where both can be pampered for 30 days. I’m sure that there is at least one in California — so maybe you and the babies can be whisked away to the hotel — and let others do the work of moving and setting things up while you and the babies relax and de-stress. Just a thought…. 🙂

      • Love this idea!

      • We’re planning a sort of mellow, lower budget version of this. I’ve made it clear that I’m not lifting a finger for the actual move — I don’t think I could even if I desperately wanted to — and we should have all hands on deck just afterward to help with unpacking and baby care. It’s not exactly a spa, but it should help my sanity somewhat 🙂

  • Rave: Tickets to the Word at 9:20, a “supergroup” that, like locusts, only emerges every 14 years to put out an album.
    Rant: Due to scheduling hassles, am stuck with an extra ticket while girlfriend goes to the theater.
    Rave: in a relationship where stuff like this doesn’t cause drama.

  • Accountering

    Rant: Caps last night. Refs were garbage, but 5-0 is never acceptable. Shots were even, and we out-hit them, but you still cant lose 5-0, especially at home. Big one on Thursday at home vs an always very good Chicago.

    • I watched most of the game, and it seemed like we were penned into our own end for nearly the entire game. Ugh. Disappointing, for sure.

      • Any thoughts on Ovi’s “personal reasons” for missing the game?

        • I’m so perplexed by that! Saw in one of the Post stories that there aren’t any family health issues, and heard on the broadcast that he was in the Verizon Center during the game. So…where does that leave us? But it doesn’t sound like anyone is talking.

          • Accountering

            Team Stream just reported that he missed the game be cause he overslept for the AM skate. Good for Trotz for putting down the hammer early in the season.
            Set another alarm Ovie…

          • I too am happy to see Trotz enforcing the rules for everyone.
            Caps are now 1-3-1 in games that both Ovi and Backstrom miss. It’s kind of surprising they’ve only missed that many overlapping games. I hope Backstrom’s back soon.

  • Rave: just signed the lease on my first ‘together’ apartment with my partner.
    Rant: need to buy living room furniture (never invested in that living alone) and desks. Anyone have experience with wayfair or other starter furniture recommendations? Feeling out of my depth as I’m absolutely horrible at judging how stuff will fit.

    • LOVE Wayfair!!! We have ordered quite a few things from them and no issues. My mom loves it too and orders stuff all the time.

    • Congratulations on moving in together! Regarding furniture, I’m slightly embarrassed to admit how much of our apartment is still furnished by IKEA. But the higher end stuff is actually pretty nice. My one word of advice: don’t feel you have to buy everything all at once. It took us almost a year to find a coffee table that we both liked, but was so worth the wait. And we lived in our place for 1.5 years before we figured out the best storage system for the hall closet. Sometimes it helps to live in a space for awhile.

      • Accountering

        Don’t hesitate to pick up extra stuff you need on CL too. Especially the IKEA Hemnes dressers or whatever. Find one in good shape, already assembled, and save yourself the 3 hours of assembly time. There is plenty of other stuff to waste your time with during a move besides assembling IKEA furniture. Buy it for $150, sell it for $150 in 6 months when you are ready to upgrade.

        • Don’t be afraid to pick up anything non-upholstered on CL. I got a set of 4 bamboo Hollywood regency dining chairs for $300. That set, same condition, would sell for $800-1000 at a used furniture store or website.
          I do agree that picking out a new couch together is a great idea though. I got mine at Warehouse Showroom in Alexandria. I shopped around a lot and these guy had the best prices and service. They deliver to DC.
          Target has nicer stuff on their website than they do in stores. I’ve gotten some nice items for reasonable prices there as well.

    • HaileUnlikely

      To help you assess how stuff will fit, try laying out a bunch of empty boxes to match the dimensions of stuff you’re considering buying.

    • I’ve had good luck with Overstock. I’ve been able to return a couple large items with no issue, but kept most of the things I’ve ever ordered from there. I also really like getting a great deal on something lightly used. Our living room stuff came from craigslist, but it’s Crate and Barrel, it was in great shape (someone was relocating to Ohio and didn’t want to take it with them), and we got it for less than 1/10th of the original price. Check for Room and Board, Mitchell Gold, etc. and keep searching or set alerts. You can even find exactly what you want and then set a craigslist alert for that item. Agree with the other poster that it doesn’t have to be done all at once.

    • I’d definitely recommend ikea for certain items that you feel aren’t statement pieces or are high priority stuff (like a dining room table perhaps). World Market has great sofas and chairs. Good luck and congrats!

      • HaileUnlikely

        I have the Stornas table and couldn’t be happier with it. It looks nice and is very sturdy. I got it for around $300, and haven’t see anything I like better for less than about $800.

      • A lot of people pooh-pooh IKEA, but they have some very good, solid pieces. It really varies.
        My experience has been that IKEA kitchen/dining tables are pretty solid. Their wooden chairs really range in quality — some are flimsy and don’t want to stay assembled, whereas others are solid. I have two dressers from IKEA. One (which I bought new) is fine, although the sides and backs of the drawers aren’t as high as I’d like. The other (which I got as a freebie) is maddening, because the drawers are always getting stuck and refusing to pull out or push in.

        • Did you try rubbing the edges (on the drawers and on the dresser) with wax? Use an old candle.
          Or, sandpaper the drawer edges

          • I don’t think it’s that the edges are stuck — I think it’s something to do with the metal rails and how the bearing things are running on them. Will give those things a try, though.

    • Advice: 1) Look at the item measurements and measure the space where it’s going to go. I’ve messed up a few choices by not paying enough attention to dimensions and ending up with a piece that’s too big for the space and makes the room feel tiny. 2) i like Crate and Barrel stuff, but they are expensive for my taste. So if there’s a piece I have my heart set on, I’ll run a search to see if I can find it on Amazon or elsewhere for cheaper. I got a great C&B cabinet desk for half off that way. 3) sample sites like Ideeli, Gilt, Joss and Main, etc run good furniture sales on a pretty regular basis.

    • I have found great bargains at the Georgetown Flea Market and at Eastern Market. Don’t be afraid to haggle a little bit but antique furniture is often way better made and will stand up the test of time. Maybe not for a couch but tables, desks, etc. it is worth it to check out the antique stores in the area.

  • Rant: Incompetent Freecycler who couldn’t find my house (to pick something up). Not only had I given her the street address (the numbers are clearly visible on the house), I’d also given her the cross streets and a description of the house. Somehow she found the block but couldn’t locate the house. I don’t understand how that’s even possible.
    Rave: Most Freecycle picker-uppers are way more competent.
    Rave: After I gave her a Google StreetView link, she came back and picked the stuff up.

    • Accountering

      This is embarrassing.

      • The only other time that’s happened was with a woman who was elderly and was going by a landmark I mentioned (a chain store). She apparently hadn’t looked up the address online, and the store she was thinking of was significantly further north than the one I was referring to.
        After that, I started mentioning the cross streets when I gave people the street address, and also mentioning the nearest major intersection.

    • I Dont Get It

      I’ve gone so far as to include in my ad that if you need extensive directions to find Logan/U area, please don’t reply.

      • Hahaha! Seriously.
        When I’ve picked up items from other people, I often find that their house numbers aren’t clearly visible. Or sometimes their _own_ house numbers are visible, but the numbers for other houses on the block aren’t, making them harder to find. So when I’m giving things away, I try to provide additional information to make things a little easier.
        But yeah — online maps have been around and in common use for something like 15 years now, so I don’t have much sympathy for people who need everything completely spoon-fed to them.

    • I wonder if this is the incredibly confused woman I gave directions to last night.
      But I *always* forget which street you actually live on, so who knows. Also, it was late. But man oh man, she was having problems.

      • She came back a little before 6 p.m., so that might have been her!!

        • This was around 10:15.
          The streets are in alphabetical order people!!!

          • Except when they’re not. Going up 14th from CH metro, it’s Kenyon, Park, Monroe, Newton, Meridian, Oak, Otis…

          • That’s true and there are exceptions to the rules, like Roads, of which Park is one. Roads do not have to follow the grid rules.
            Where we were they do go up alphabetically. I will give you that Georgia is confusing because it’s 7th St south of Florida, then is bends a bit and it can be hard to remember what numbers are east and west of it, but that’s what the block number signs on the street signs are for.

  • Rave: received text message this morning saying my wife’s green card has been approved. Thought it would take up to a year for approval, but took “just” 5 months.
    Rave: (Probably) won’t have to deal with USCIS for two years.
    Rant: Will have to deal with USCIS again in two years.

  • I Dont Get It

    Rave: I got a good deal on tulip bulbs on sale at Dutch Bulbs and also some Oriental lilies but they weren’t on sale.
    Rant: What is this shipping charge thing? Darn you Jeff Bezos you’ve taken the fun out of online shopping!!!

    Rant: People who start off a reply to a work email with “Unfortunately I’m in New Zealand.”

    Rant/Rave: All the spiders moving into my house now that it is getting cool out. My living room windows look like I have decorated for Halloween!

    Rave: My side effect from taking a med seems to be diminishing now that I am on something else.
    Rant: Something else has a diuretic component.

  • Rant: The arrest of the teenager at citi bank, because a white person is afraid of black people. The white person who reported it, should be tracked down and arrested for a hate crime.

    How do you get a report of a suspicious person, and just come and start tackling people? It’s ridiculous, there is no doubt any other race, this would not have happened.

    Getting so sick and tired of this. Just makes you want to scream.

    And of course not one mention of the incident on Popville. But I’m sure we will get another post about a lost dog…

    • The blame rests on the cops. People call in suspicous behavior all the time everywhere. But its totally unclear what prompted the cops to takcle the guy.

      • Did you read the article? Cop receives suspicious behavior call, arrives at the scene, and the kid runs. Not saying the call was justified, but if you run when a cop shows up, there’s a decent chance you’re getting chased, and if you don’t stop, tackled. It’s unfortunate, but I have a hard time saying it’s excessive. What’s the alternative? Cops arrive at a scene with limited information, someone runs, and they look at each other, shrug, and carry on with their day?

        • I don’t know, maybe they could have waited for an actual report of a crime, before tackling somebody to the ground. Crazy right…

          They ran because the police pulled up on them like there was a report of active shooter.

          Are you really that nieve to believe that the cops would have tackled a white kid like that off of a suspicious person call?

          It must be nice living in your white privileged world.

          • So your position is that when the cops pull up on a call with vague information regarding suspicious activity, and someone – anyone, of any race – runs, you think the cops should not give chase? And you call me naive? Sorry, that’s just not realistic.
            I have no idea whether the cops would have chased and tackled a white teenager in the same situation. And, BTW, neither do you.
            Like I said, it’s an unfortunate situation. But in my opinion, the blame here lies with (i) the woman who called in the suspicious activity report for no apparent reason, and (ii) the teen, for running when he’d done nothing wrong.
            I reiterate – if the cops pull up on an active call, and you run, it can’t come as a surprise when you’re chased, and tackled.
            You can dismiss my perspective because I’m privileged, of course, but name calling rarely helps make your point.

          • HaileUnlikely

            I do, really, truly believe that if I had run from the police, they would have tackled my middle-aged white ass. I might be wrong, but I wouldn’t risk it. I also do realize that for unfair and f*cked up reasons, I would probably receive better treatment than an African American teenager in the event that I did not run, but when you run, all bets are off.

          • So a cop car pulls up and almost hit you in the cross walk, cops jump out screaming at you, with guns drawn probably…. and you know the history of violence, killings, etc.. they have been done to people of you color for no causes by police… you would not have ran?

            Until you have been pulled over for being black, asked why you are in a certain neighborhood because your black,etc.. you have no idea what your reaction would have been.

          • Accountering

            You are being absolutely ridiculous. The cops show up for a reported crime, and someone takes off running. When told to stop, they didn’t. Make it all about race if you like, but two kids ran from the police, and were deservedly tackled. They then resisted arrest. Don’t run from the police.
            DC Police do a tremendous job when it comes to the race issue, miles and miles better than many departments. I in large part agree with the BLM movement, but in this case, protesters in DC were looking for something to protest, and they found a lame example.

          • Accountering

            No – if cops jumped out of a car with guns drawn at me, I am not going to run from them. I am going to put my hands in the air, and follow instructions.
            I sympathize with what you are saying, have spoken with friends who have been pulled over etc, but this is not a good example of that. This is a kid who ran from the police, and was then deservedly tackled.

          • Of course you would not have run. How many white people have you heard about being shot or choked for doing what your saying, stopping and putting there hands up.

            I’m sorry if a white teen with a bookbag and ear phones on is in the same situation, no tackling would have happened. It would not have any gotten to that point, the cops would not have even stopped them.

            deservedly tackled for running down the street? For having done nothing.

            I don’t know how about observing the teens, before making a violent decision to tackle. Pulling up slowly and asking questions. But that would be to much like police work.
            Again from eye witnesses, they pulled up like somebody reported an active robbery or man with gun.

          • First of all – guns drawn? Where did you get that? I haven’t seen that account, though I’ve only read the Post article.
            Second, if a cop tells me to stop, I stop.
            Third, yes, the cops deservedly tackled him, because he ran. The police simply received a call, pulled up, and someone ran from the scene. Of COURSE he was chased. What other option is there?
            Fourth – simple question – if a cop tells you to stop, and you don’t, is it OK for him to chase and tackle you?

          • HaileUnlikely

            B – I am not arguing that African Americans in general, and teenage boys in particular, are not treated unfairly by the police. They are treated unfairly and with undeserved suspicion. It’s f*cked up. But seriously, do you know a single person who has ever been approached by the police despite not having done anything wrong, decided to make a run for it, and concluded, “thank goodness I ran – I clearly ended up better off that way.” I sure don’t.
            I have a Godson from Togo. I love him very much. He plays center on his high school’s basketball team, and has the physical gifts to be very good at that. His size in conjunction with his very dark skin result in some people unfairly being afraid of him. To the best of my knowledge he has not had any negative interactions with the police. However, if the police ever do try to stop him, I sincerely hope that he complies and does not run or resist, because I am infinitely more afraid of what would happen if he tried to run or resist than if he complies, even if the stop was unwarranted to begin with.

          • Uh.. of course its not ok for him to tackle me, if I don’t stop. Its called being illegally detained.

            Again no crime was reported or committed. A racist reported a black teen being suspicious for opening the door for her.

            Should every person be detained/tackled for being suspicious?

            But again no white person would ever go through a situation like this, so its no way you could understand. Thats why its great being a white male in America.

          • No white person would ever be chased and tackled by the police? Really?
            As far as “illegal detention” – again, it is your position that it is ILLEGAL to for the police to chase and tackle someone when they run away? You’re going to need to provide some support for that.
            I freely admit that I have a different relationship with the police than young black men do. And again, you’re free to discount my opinion. But as Halie said, running or resisting rarely turns out well.
            It seems your whole point boils down to the argument that the police pulled up too fast, so Goolsby was afraid and ran – and he was right to run. Is that correct?

          • Accountering

            I am just going to stop here, because you are clearly wrong, and just want to hate the cops or whatever.
            “Uh.. of course its not ok for him to tackle me, if I don’t stop. Its called being illegally detained.” No, if you run, they have plenty of reasonable suspicion to stop you, using force. You are simply wrong.

          • Accountering

            “Should every person be detained/tackled for being suspicious?”
            No, but every person who runs from the police should be tackled, for being suspicious. You are being ridiculous.

      • I’m done as well. Like I said, until you actually go through racial profiling by police, you will never understand. Keep your head in the sand, and enjoy all the privileges being a white male in this country gives you.

        And the only person reporting the teen running is the police. And Of Course they would never lie, to cover up for themselves……..

    • Where did you hear about it? I haven’t seen any coverage of this incident.
      I am, however, glad to see that the woman with the concealed carry permit who shot at a car being driven by shoplifters was charged with reckless use of a handgun.

    • I read the article this morning and was appalled. From the sounds of it, the young man was detained for nothing more than being in a place while being black.

    • HaileUnlikely

      I’ll withhold judgment, need more info. From the little bit that I’ve heard, it sounds like the young man ran when the police showed up. Regardless of whether one has done anything that merits being questioned by the police in the first place, running from them usually doesn’t end well.

      • Blithe

        On the other hand, for many of us, not running often doesn’t end well either.

        • HaileUnlikely

          Can’t argue with that, and I recognize that I have absolutely no idea what it is like to be an African American teenage male in Southeast DC, and that there are other legitimate perspectives on the matter that I lack the experience to empathize with, but I can’t imagine the scenario in which running does not make the situation worse (not good outcome vs. bad outcome, but bad outcome vs. worse outcome).

          • The scenario where it ends up better if you run is if the cops, realizing no crime was committed, don’t really give chase, so you get away.

    • Did you catch that Washington Post article about Georgetown shop owners/employees, along with some residents, using a group chat app to discuss potentially “sketchy” people walking around town?

    • I don’t disagree with you, but you have to admit we’re getting mixed massages from government. “If you see something, say something” and all.

      • Blithe

        Maybe we should be more clear about how we define: “something”.

      • the “see something say something” campaign (which few people pay attention to anyway) has nothing to do with this type of situation. it has to do with someone leaving a bookbag or suitcase on a metrotrain and walking off at the next stop, for example. terrorism. not young men who are just standing around.

        • In at least one of the instances described in the article, the people who were identified as suspicious, immediately after this identification went out, pepper sprayed an employee and ran out of the store with a significant amount of merchandise. It isn’t all unfounded suspicion.

    • I’m sick of the narrative being, well he should have just stopped. I am citizen, I should have not have to be detained, unless im committing a crime or have been reported as committing a crime. Not because somebody thought I was suspicious

      • B, I completely understand where you are coming from, and i sympathize with you. however, unfortunately, it seems that running is considered resisting and resisting is a crime. the part that sucks is the disparity between how a white male who resists is treated and how a black male who is perceived as resisting is treated. THAT seems to be the crux of the issue.
        from my perspective, our communities need to work on teaching youth of all races strategies to interact with the police, even if they are terrified. just as we need to teach our police not to use excessive force. this work will take an effort on everyone’s part.

    • I’m done as well. Like I said, until you actually go through racial profiling by police, you will never understand. Keep your head in the sand, and enjoy all the privileges being a white male in this country gives you.

      And the only person reporting the teen running is the police. And Of Course they would never lie, to cover up for themselves……..

      • Accountering

        Sorry, I am not willing to pile on and immediately assume the police are all corrupt liars. He ran, he deserved to get tackled. He then resisted the police when they tried to put him in cuffs for running. Seems pretty cut and dry.

      • Oh, good grief. First you suggested that the police had weapons drawn, with no evidence of that at all (that I’ve seen). Then you suggested that the police are making up stories about the teen running, when, as Halie pointed out above, the teen said he ran.
        I get that you are passionate about this issue. But you can’t make up facts to justify the narrative you fastened onto. And you keep saying that “until you actually go through racial profiling by police, you will never understand.” Even if I grant you that it’s understandable why Goolsby ran – what does that change? Regardless of your reasons, if you run from the police after they’ve told you to stop, you can’t be surprised if you’re chased, tackled and put in cuffs.
        Finally, it is dogmatic, fact-free positions like you’re taking, where your entire response boils down to “check your privilege,” that discredit the BLM movement. you are doing the cause you purport to champion a real disservice.

        • Accountering

          I agree with the last two paragraphs from DCD wholeheartedly.
          You are on a quite liberal blog, based in Washington D.C. The fact you are championing THIS guys case, where the police were very likely in the right, by making up facts, putting out conspiracy theories, and spouting off about how there is no way any of us could EVER understand what you have gone through, is doing a HUGE disservice to your movement.

  • Rant: exhausted after the show last night. witnessed drama and I was literally and figuratively in the middle of it. scene is too small.
    Rant: low match. he was genuinely friendly last night and tried to engage with me and I was ice cold. caved and messaged him today that it was nice to see him last night. no response. I never learn.
    Rant: work. taking on new work while coworker is out.
    Rant: too many rants

    • Question: If he was ice cold to you last night and then texted you this morning, would you respond? As someone that’s in a raging mood for no good reason this morning, I get it – but from an outsiders perspective you may be coming off as hot and then cold for no explicable reason. This isn’t to bash you at all…just to point out that if he’s even a little bit oblivious about things, he may be VERY confused right now. It seems like you’re struggling to stay any one course with this guy. My suggestion would be to pick one and stick with it…be it casual friend or zero contact. I hope it stops causing you so much stress.

      • You’re right. It’s also not in my nature to be mean to people. Took the wrong advice from a friend. Just gonna wait it out and see what happens. I also had to message him to follow up on this thing he invited me to tomorrow to see if he’s still going. No response yet. I’m trying to make up for being a jerk last night and failing.

        • Stop. Just stop trying to be nice. Stop trying to interact. This attempted relationship is seriously messing with your mental health. You shouldn’t have to work this hard to be friends with someone. Sometimes, friendships are NOT meant to be. It’s ok to be ice cold to someone who is a total douche. I’m pretty sure EVERYONE here told you as much yesterday. CUT OFF ALL CONTACT, he is making you insane!

        • palisades

          NotABot is the same person that was in some love triangle nonsense before. They have no sense of reality when it comes to relationships. I don’t know why people on this website continue to respond to his/her? issues.

          • Actually, I was never in a love triangle. I wasn’t interested in the other person. I do have a sense of reality but I find a lot of the advice easier said than done. Cutting off total contact without explanation is not how I handle things.

          • I think you’re thinking of the person of unknown gender who was seeing a man & a woman. Different person entirely.

          • palisades

            No it’s NotABot. They’re the only person on here that uses the term “low match.” They used to go by a different name but changed it because everyone was wising up to their inane dating stories.

        • I agree with Andie’s advice — try to pick one course of action and stick to it. You don’t need to be “ice cold” to the guy, and you don’t necessarily need to cut off all contact. Maybe you could be friendly, but engage only at a surface level and for no longer than is socially required?
          And I like Jeslett’s idea of telling him that when he did X (bailing on plans you’d made, etc.), you felt Y and it hurt your feelings.

          • Very reasonable advice. I’ll see if he continues on this path of crap friendship then I can pick a course. Looking like I’ll have to do surface level friendship but not cut off all contact. Things were going well and we eagerly hungout and talked like good friends before last week. People change their minds about people I guess.

      • I’m going to take Andie’s advice, which I completely agree with, one step farther. Actions are great, picking one path and staying on it is great, but it’s going to be hard for him to pick up on that. So, (god I love to beat a dead a horse, where is a republican pundit to make a racist, culinary remark?) use your words and tell him that you were hurt or whatever emotion you felt about the weekend thing and that you didn’t know how to be nice around him last night, but now regret it. But that you still just want to be friends, friends who are considerate (which all friends should be) and not rub cool plans in your face.
        Be open and honest and encourage him to be open and honest and you may even have fewer of these issues in the future. There’s no need for you to try to interpret his actions when you can just ask him and if he isn’t asking you about yours you can just tell him.

        • See this is the advice I prefer. Being an adult also means having a conversation before you make a decision. The idea of just dropping off the face of the planet is like friendship ghosting, and we all have strong opinions on ghosting.

          • NotABot – you are an adult and free to conduct your relationships as you see fit. If this is the approach you prefer, then that’s all well and good. My advice to you, to cut off contact, was because you don’t seem to be succeeding with the “slow withdraw / ask questions / get clarification” approach. It just seemed to be adding to your misery. I hope you know I do wish you well in resolving this, and I hope you’re still coming to HH tomorrow 🙂

          • Why is that needed? You casually dated by your own admission, decided to “be friends” and you’re sticking it out because you like his friends more than you like him. I just don’t get why there needs to be some sort of break up after you just gave him the cold shoulder. You’re coming off very needy here. It wasn’t your longer-term bf or friend. Let it go!

          • Yeah probably not going to HH TBH after today.

          • I agree with Anon Spock. (And those words don’t exactly trip off my tongue.) This is some guy you casually dated for a brief period of time with whom you had such little in common that you christened him “Low Match” even before you started dating. This is not worth the time or emotional expenditure it’s costing you.

          • Aww, come on NotABot! Don’t let a few awkward exchanges keep you from coming to happy hour. I tend to lurk more than post, and there are lots of conversations I see where I just make a conscious decision to not engage (anything dealing with crime or race). Still, I’ve gone to several happy hours and found that everyone is really nice in person. Plus, you could potentially make some new friends that are (probably) not connected to mr low match. You should come!

    • One of the absolute best parts of being an adult is deciding who gets to be in your life and who doesn’t (opposed to high school/middle school when you’re stuck with whomever is around you). If there is little or no meaningful or valuable aspects to this relationship (which it sounds like there aren’t) then don’t bother with it. There’s no reason to harp over someone that causes stress in your life – unless it’s family or you have some long history together – and even then the choice is yours.

      • True. There is value to our friendship, and it’s the people I’ve met and keep meeting through him. They’re great!

    • Anonynon

      I feel like you live in a constant paradox. I sympathize, its not easy.

  • General question for the homeowners in the crowd – when you have work done on your house, do you stay home from work or work from home for the duration of the project? I’m a relatively new homeowner and have a few small jobs that I will be having done over the next few months. This isn’t a gut reno or anything, but a few small projects that may last a few days each.

    I am not sure what the protocol is for homeowner presence when work is being done – be at home and in a room out of their way? Greet them in the morning and head off to work as usual, leaving them instructions on how to lock up? I don’t want to hover over them but don’t want them to think it is weird to be in my home without me there. What do others do?

    • I work from home unless I know the contractor and can trust him/her.

    • I give contractors a key with instructions. They carry insurance and I generally only hire people whom are recommended by people I trust. It’s just not possible to stay home and actually get work done in some cases!

    • HaileUnlikely

      For single-day stuff, I try to arrange to work from home. For multi-day stuff, I leave them a key and go to work unless the nature of the work is such that they are likely to have to consult with me during the course of the work.

    • I stay home for the things that will take a couple hours or a day or two. I’ve only had one situation where I gave the contractor the keys because the project took about three weeks. It made me a little nervous–I trusted him, but I was always a little worried they would forget to lock up or something. Everything went fine though!

    • Agree with others. Work from home for day 1 and then adjust accordingly. After I get to know contractors, I tend to give them a key. Also, my variables include concerns about cats escaping. I may not be as concerned about staying home if I didn’t have pets.

  • Quotia Zelda

    Rave: Looking forward to the happy hour tomorrow.
    Rave: New photo of Billy the Kid discovered:

  • Random Question: Anyone have any nice looking mail slot catchers? I have a new place with a mail slot, and dog has started tearing up the mail. I’ve seen some stuff online, but they aren’t all that attractive to me, but need a solution pretty quick!

  • RANT: Speaking of a paradox, the Paradox nightclub in Baltimore is closing in mid 2016. It’s been open for 25 years, playing great house music. Such a great venue – it kicks the crap out of anything you find in NYC or DC nowadays.

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