Random Reader Rant and/or Revel

Photo by PoPville flickr user  wolfpackWX

You can talk about whatever is on your mind – quality of life issues, a beautiful tree you spotted, scuttlebutt, or any random questions/thoughts you may have. But please no personal attacks and no need to correct people’s grammar. This is a place to vent and/or celebrate things about daily life in DC.

324 Comment

  • SFT

    Rant: Snoring husband.
    Rave: I got hit on…it’s been a while since this old married lady got a wink from a stranger 😉
    Rant: It was via LinkedIn. I guess some people are too cheap to pay for proper dating sites!

  • Rave: Thip Khao. So good.

    • Thanks for the reminder that I need to try this place!
      Semi-related rave: I think Thally is one of the most under-rated restaurants in the city. We went last night and the three of us all thought our meal was one of the best we’ve had recently. The food is somewhat understated, but in this small-plates, everything-“concept” restaurant city, the understatedness is really welcome. It’s also nice that the place is small, fairly intimate, and you can hear the other people in your group.

      • Plan ahead if you want to go at anywhere remotely approaching a normal time for dinner, especially on the weekend. We generally can go last minute because we’re OK eating at 5:30 (because we have an 8 yo, not because we’re geriatrics who like the early bird special). But even at that early time, the place is half full, and packed by the time we leave. It’s gratifying to see a local place have so much success so early in its existence.
        Then, after dinner, go to La Caprice for dessert!

        • The menu is more limited, but we were there for brunch last Saturday from about 12:30-2pm and it was close to dead. Food was really good though, and we’ll be back for dinner.

        • How is the wait early in the week?

          • They’re closed Tuesdays, and also take reservations. Not sure if you could walk in early in the week, I know after 6 or so on the weekends you can’t.

          • hammers

            I went two thursdays ago and we had reservations for 6:30 and it was pretty empty, but by the time we finished our meal, around 7:30-8 it was pretty crowded. I tried to go on Friday and the wait was over an hour for 1 or 2 people.

        • You can also call ahead and make a reservation

    • still haven’t been able to go – wish they were open for lunch! I love the VA location….SO good

  • Andie302

    Rant: My heart is heavy. Someone that I served in the military with and then reconnected with 10 years later just passed away from a heroin overdose. I suspected it was an overdose of some kind, but got confirmation this morning from a mutual friend. He was so bright and funny, but he struggled with addiction. So sad.

  • Rant: I think the kiddo was up way early again today. She was SUCH a crankpot at breakfast!
    Rave: I don’t know for sure because she wasn’t yelling. Did she really entertain herself in her crib for over an hour? Or was I imagining things?
    Rant: Getting woken up early some days–>I wake up on my own and then possibly imagine toddler sounds and can’t fall back asleep.
    Rave: bloodwork appointment was zippy quick this morning.

    • SFT

      My guy has been getting up early too. I just read an article about how a full moon can affect sleeping patterns and cause sleeplessness. Maybe there’s something to it!

      • HA! Yesterday, I thought it was a growth spurt. She ate a TON at breakfast and dinner. Today, I’m just flummoxed since she was super cranky about eating–though that doesn’t necessarily mean not hungry. Oh well. If it’s a full moon thing, maybe both our kiddos will be sleeping better soon?

        • the benefit of a child that basically never sleeps is that I don’t know any better! Granted, my health is suffering incredibly, but still – I don’t know any better at this point! 15mo strong of very little sleep!!

          • Booooo — ugh. It has to end eventually, right? I’ll keep crossing fingers & toes for you. Some kids are just not great sleepers 🙁

            Though right about now, I’m really exctied for my parents to visit in a week and a half. I’ll give my mom cart blanche to get her darling granddaughter up when she wakes up (after, say, 6am or so unless she’s really upset before then) and get to sleep in. That was the system last time we went to CT and it was glorious. For some odd reason, kiddo almost always sleeps in when my parents are visiting, but even if that happens, either way I’ll get some sleep.

      • that might explain why my two year old was basically up until 2am last night even though she is usually a rock start sleeper (8pm to 7am every day). Brutal. I forgot how bad sleep deprivation can be.

  • emvee

    Rave: New cookbooks. I highly recommend Jerusalem: A Cookbook. The recipes are delicious and the photographs are beautiful.
    Rant: I’m really over the cold and the wind. Counting down the days to
    Rave: Hawaii!

    • OO where are you going? I just did Honolulu and Maui.

    • Yes, where? Check out the Andrew Doughty books–they’re the best for Hawaii! Kauai is absolutely gorgeous 🙂

    • I love new cookbooks, and just got one as a gift that is both gorgeous and useless (for me). Smoke: New Firewood Cooking, by Tim Byrnes from Texas. It looks spectacular (and won a James Beard award), but as a city dweller and non-camper, I’m really struggling with what to do with it. Also, a great new one is Heritage, by Sean Brock from Husk in Charleston. It’s fantastic (though it leans a little to heavily on specialty ingredients that are difficult and/or expensive to procure in DC).

      • I want to do a cookbook swap. How many people have cookbooks they’ve looked through and then never looked at again?!

        • I would be up for that. My “show-cookbook” shelf is really impressive – French Laundry, Ad Hoc, Le Bernardin, Momofuku, Escoffier, Heritage, etc. I’ve made about a half dozen things from all of them combined. I always say it’s research for retirement, when I MIGHT have the time to spend 36 hours making dinner.

        • This is very very tempting, but is it terrible that I like my “show” cookbooks? All but one of them survived the Great Purge of 2015 because they are like security blankets for me in a way. I cook full meals at least five days a week, but my recipes all come from online these days.

          • me too – Pinterest. But I still buy them. At least I stopped magazine subscriptions. I still get vegetarian times and my coworker gets cooking light that she gives to me….but still!

        • emvee

          Oh man the few cookbooks I own I’m hard pressed to hand off to others. I do have a pretty expansive shared Google Doc with a friend that includes some of our favorite recipes we’ve found online.

          • Shared google doc is a great idea! I have my own file of favorite recipes but could easily share it with my sister (since part of our regular conversations include what we made for dinner)

        • Me! I definitely have a few cookbooks that I could stand to part with. And co-signed, I love the “show” cookbooks, but very rarely make actual use of them. Ad Hoc by Thomas Keller is the most user-friendly of them and those recipes are in heavy rotation in my kitchen. But the rest just sit there looking pretty.

        • I Dont Get It

          I have zero show cookbooks. I tend to buy things like “The Junior League of Richmond Entertaining” cookbooks at yard sales There’s one, can’t think of the title but I think it was from the late 80s where I swear almost every appetizer was wrapped in puff pastry. IDGI SR’s school (he was a middle school principal) created a cookbook once as a fundraiser and many of the recipes are hilariously awful.

          • Blithe

            I think we might have similar cookbook collections! I’ve got multiple spiral bound Junior League and church fundraising cookbooks, and a treasured copy of “White Trash Cooking” which is one of the best reads ever!

          • I’ve got those too – my in-law’s bridge club cookbook, multiple Junior league cookbooks. They’re awful, with the exception of the Asbury Park, NJ Italian American Society Cookbook from 20 years ago, given to me by my college girlfriend’s mother. That’s one of my favorites, and used more than any other cookbook besides the Epicurious online personal file and the big three-ring binder of daily recipes I keep for weekday meals.
            blahblahblah, I am impressed that Ad Hoc is in heavy rotation in your house! It’s been a while since I looked at it, but I don’t recall the recipes being very quick (though several orders of magnitude easier than the French Laundry cookbook!).

          • Emmaleigh504

            I love to read those old junior league etc cookbooks. I had an internship in library school cataloging a massive cookbook donation to a special library. The lady who owned the cookbook was married to a guy in the Navy, so they moved around a lot. She had junior league cookbooks from everywhere! Needless to say I did more reading than cataloging.

          • I Dont Get It

            At the cookbook exchange we should have a worst recipe contest. I’m pretty sure my “Man Stew” will win.

          • I Dont Get It

            I just found inadvertently online the The Anniversary Slovak-American Cook Book by the The First Catholic Slovak Ladies Union. I want!

          • @dcd: Thank you! There are definitely some recipes in Ad Hoc that I haven’t tried because they are more complicated or time-intensive than I feel like dealing with. But I find most of them to be pretty straightforward. And there are little blurbs where Keller tells why the dish is made that way and gives tips about avoiding the things that usually go wrong when making it. And agreed, AH is way more accessible than the French Laundry cookbook, which seemed to assume that you were a four star chef with an endless grocery fund.

          • IDGI — “Man Stew” is making me think of Soylent Green.

        • Although I get most of my new recipes on line (AllRecipes is my go-to), I still turn to the few cookbooks I kept after the Big Book Purge — Moosewood cookbooks (especially Moosewood Cooks at Home), a book of Ethiopian cooking, a book on curries (Curried Favor)

  • Rant: (Platonic) Guy Friend has always sort of treated me as a stand-in gf when he’s single (taking me as his date to office parties, shows at the Kennedy Center, etc.). It was fine, except he dropped me as a friend at the request of his most recent gf and now that they’re broken up, he’s constantly calling for comfort and companionship as if he hadn’t cut ties with me for the past 6 months.
    Rave: Started taking the bus instead of the metro home. It’s been great for my sanity and stress levels!

    • Aglets

      That sucks. You could use this as a teachable moment for your guy friend and sit him down & say ‘look, it really hurt me when your GF made you cut contact with me and now that she’s out of the picture you want to pretend nothing happened’.
      At the very least, make him own up to his err in judgement and perhaps the next time a woman presents an ultimatum like that (which really, should have been a red flag anyway. Insecure women demanding exclusive attention at the cost of a long-term female friend) he will hopefully know better than to roll over to her demands and actually say that just because you’re a woman it doesn’t make you her enemy.
      -signed, Been There

      • You’re right. I should probably say something. And I agree that her ultimatum should have been a red flag. I’ve ranted about this here before, but the kicker is she was originally my friend and they met through me so I have no idea why she even felt threatened by my friendship with him (not that she should have felt threatened/given an ultimatum even if I wasn’t friends with her beforehand).

        • Ewwww I can’t imagine doing this to my BF, ESPECIALLY if the friend was also a friend of mine.

        • Ah, I remember this now!
          Yeah, I’d recommend saying something. Doesn’t mean you have to cut him off as a friend if you don’t want to, but his behavior needs to be called out.

        • Seconding that it’s probably a good idea to bring it up. He probably doesn’t really think about how it seems disrespectful of your friendship. And maybe he’ll realize that the “cut off a friend I disapprove of for no reason” ultimatum is really not a good sign, as well.

        • Aglets

          Yeah, it will be uncomfortable, but in the end your bond with him will probably be stronger. It’s been my experience that dudes are pretty clueless and he probably didn’t even realize he hurt you.
          I’m pretty aghast that this woman was a friend of yours and pulled these shenanigans!

          • +1
            Call him out on his BS. That’s what good friends do. He is probably oblivious to the fact that you’re hurting, so you need to speak up. My guess is that he’s mortified, apologizes, and the both of you move on.

    • Why are you in a platonic friendship? Has either one of you wanted more?

      • I have a lot of platonic guy friends. I certainly haven’t wanted more and I highly doubt he has either.

    • You’re seeing someone now right? Just tell the friend that your new bf feels like his ex did. Or maybe just tell him you don’t feel comfortable chatting with a dude so much while in a relationship. You got a few “outs” that could/should work.

      • I didn’t get the impression that SKT was looking to drop the guy as a friend — she was just hurt by his cutting off contact with her and then resuming contact as though nothing had happened.

      • Blithe

        Wicked thought: Hang out with Platonic Guy Friend in some spot where you can freely talk. Hear him out, be your most supportive usual self, then, as msus suggested, tell him that you understand perfectly about ultimatums and relationships and priorities and such, because your new beau feels exactly the same way as his ex gf did. So even though you and your PGF have a close friendship of many years, you’re going to have to cut him loose, because, well, nookie trumps friendship. Wait for his reaction, THEN have the heart to heart. It’s manipulative — but for a good cause.
        – I’m not suggesting this purely as payback — as much as being able to have the conversation about the impact of his behavior from a slightly more enlightened perspective on his part. His behavior was cruel and damaging to your friendship, and based on your comments, he doesn’t seem to get that. On the other hand, if his response to your dramatic effort is to react as though it’s perfectly normal to drop old friendships for new, insecure beaux, then you’ll have a better understanding of your PGF’s values as you decide whether and how to move forward in your friendship with him.

    • That’s pretty ick imo (your rant). I don’t think it’s healthy to cut friends out, same sex or not, at the behest of another without really good reasons, especially to just pick it up when the person is gone and pretend nothing is wrong. His lack of acknowledgement at doing a crummy thing to you is also very immature.

    • uuuugh!!! i wish people would learn that the jealous b!itch thing never works out! sorry that your friend dropped you like a hot potato, that shoulda been a sign that the girl was no good. no advice for you, but i give you props for being the bigger person if you can take him back as a friend in a non-passive aggressive manner. I would definitely be hurt and give him a earful!

    • Ally

      Lord. That stinks. I don’t think I’d continue dating anyone who requested that I drop any of my friends. Kind of implies that he had some bigger issues going on if he even agreed to that. Hope you guys are able to salvage the friendship; you have every right to be a little miffed at him.

  • Aglets

    Rave: I’m getting a raise and a better title to reflect the three jobs I am actually doing here, so that’s pretty cool. I’m looking forward to having more of a stake in what I’m doing.

    Rant: Press releases and headaches and Outlook email system. I’m pretty sure all three are inextricably linked together.

    Rave: The magnetic fields. I love them.

  • skj84

    Rant: I think I’m dealing with SAD. I’ve been down in the dumps, and anxious for a while now. Work is stressing me out and I’m not really getting any time to relax. All I want to do is stay in bed and sleep all day. Trying to focus on positive things, but its hard. I hate winter.

    Rant: I never got my W-2 from the job I lost last spring. Of course they would find one other way to make my life miserable.

    Rave: At least it’s sunny outside today.

  • Gin & Gardening gathering will be at The Heights this Sunday Feb 8th at 6:00 pm; I’ve requested the table in the back. The reservation is under my name (Sharon, not MPinDC 🙂 )

    • Emmaleigh504

      yay! I’ll try to drag Quotia Zelda.

    • Can you give a short description of Gin and Gardening? I love gin, I love gardening so it sounds like this is for me…

      • The idea for the group came during a PoPville HH when a few of us were talking about gardening and agreed it would be fun to get together and talk more about gardening. At least one of us (me) was drinking gin => Gin & Gardening. There’s no agenda or anything – more of a time to get together for suggestions, ideas, aspirations for gardening in the city.

        • hammers

          Unsolicited advice here! I suggest having at least a theme of the evening, such as maybe what to plant first or favorite spring veggies or something (coming from a non gardener) otherwise it may be hard to get people talking until the second or third round of gin 🙂

          • Emmaleigh504

            I have topics! I need help finding a plant to shade my violets (so needs to like moist and acidic soil) that is small enough to fit in my pot. Think about it and we can discuss on Feb 8. I have a few things in mind, but they aren’t my favorite, so I’m looking for other ideas.

    • Perfect – I need some motivation to start prepping the veggie beds.

    • My wife gardens in our back yard–I’ll try to convince her to join you 🙂

    • Are you planning on doing seed exchanges or anything like that? Might be an added benefit…

      • Yes, definitely seed (and perennial) swap will be in order. I will have LOTS of seeds to share once my big order from Pinetree arrives!

  • Pablo Raw

    Rant: All the things I need to do before I leave; so it was great to get to the office and hear
    Rave: “you just need to do this and this, then you can leave”

  • Revel: Gave my resignation notice yesterday for a soul-sucking job. So ready to find something fulfilling for myself and others.

  • Rave: Have a roommate moving in soon. Check in hand already.
    Rave: Date night redo. Revisiting the place that was closed on our first date.
    Rant: Having to play things by ear because she’s busier than me. Yikes! I’m a planner, so it’s tough; although, she always gets back to me in plenty of time.
    Rant: Seemingly broken office chair makes me feel like a toddler at my desk.
    Rave: Double strong tea: 1 orange spice & 1 raspberry black tea Yum!

    • Emmaleigh504

      That tea sounds great! Glad you got a roommate.

      • Tea is perfect without too much of the caffeine jitters. Yea, she’s fresh out of college but seems nice, so I think we’ll work out fine. It probably didn’t take me a long time but with all the cancellations and no shows it felt like forever!

  • Rant: I cannot wake up this week, so I’m exhausted all day, which doesn’t help with:
    Rant: Trying to do complex calculus with few examples. Still have half my problem set to do tonight.
    Rave: Was able to telepathically tell my friend needed love and give it to her at the right time. It was the weirdest thing ever.
    Funny: Facebook just told me it was out anniversary (even though it was several years short). We’re both having a good laugh about it.
    Rant: I think I need to get my HVAC and fridge both serviced – HVAC is making banging/grinding noises, and found ice melts in my freezer last night. Grrr.

    • Whose anniversary — you and the friend? You and Facebook?? You and the fiance?

      • Me and the friend (actually, Mutual Friend). Not engaged to boy, although seems like everyone else in my life is, haha.

        • Ahh, the Mutual Friend through whom you know Drama Friend?
          Oops, sorry — I was thinking that you and the boyfriend were engaged because my recollection that Drama Friend wanted to plan your wedding or something, but now I remember that the deal was actually that Drama Friend was alarmed because the boyfriend hadn’t said “I love you” after X months. (And/or was it because you hadn’t had a define-the-relationship talk? I am slipping on the remembering-details front… need caffeine.)

          • my recollection *was
            As I said, need caffeine.

          • Haha I need MORE caffeine. I feel you. And no worries – there are so many individual story lines it’s like reading GoT with 50 more characters!
            DF was concerned boyfriend hasn’t said that he loves me, even though he decided I was his girlfriend like 4 months in, I’ve met his parents, his youngest brother, a good chunk of his close friends (including childhood friends)…
            And wedding talk is close – she wanted to plan/criticize MF’s wedding (which I haven’t mentioned to MF, and think I’m just going to leave alone. I don’t want to perpetuate drama, even if DF is shaking up to be pretty sh*tty friend-wise for both of us).

  • Rave: Thanks for the recommendation for The Americans. I am almost through Season 1 and loving it!

  • Rant: The fade. I’m a day late to this conversation since it was such a hot topic yesterday, but the guy I was so excited about has pulled back after 2 dates. He responds to my messages but no longer initiates.
    I already know the answer to this but I think I need to hear people say DON”T DO IT! Does it ever make sense to ask what happened? I know that if a guy doesn’t get in touch with you, you have your answer (especially after just 2 dates), but I feel so compelled to follow up. I know I’m hoping he’ll say something that’s fixable and we’re back on, which makes it even worse because that is unlikely and foolish. Ok Popville, give it to me straight. My heart should follow my head on this one right? Do I at least get points for recognizing what’s happening here?

    • Honestly, it was two dates…if it had been two months…yes.

      • I know you’re right but they were two pretty amazing dates. 😉

      • I didnt see the discussion yesterday….because, well job. But how often were you contacting amazing date guy—like do you feel it was overkill due to your excitement? how long has it been since you last texted/called? maybe slow the roll and see what happens but a fade out after two dates, not a good sign. Also, dont think that you did something “wrong”, sometimes it is just about chemistry and being a good match.

        • We messaged a lot but it was usually him initiating and I was happy to go along with it. When the messaging stopped I initiated a conversation and he responded but it felt different so I didn’t push it further. Now I’m here wondering to try contacting him again or just let it go.
          Thank you. I needed to hear the last part of that paragraph, but my brain just wants to figure it out and I’m fighting against the urge. I’ve had a much easier time giving the advice you’re giving than I’m having accepting it myself.
          I’m going to let it go.

          • I am too, the better advice giver than following it myself:) I just ended a relationship two weeks ago because I was doing all the effort. I would just keep saying to yourself that you are bad ass and dude missed out! PS: You will forget about this guy sooner than you think.

          • Aaaand…. cue the Frozen soundtrack! 🙂

          • Thank you so much. I’m laughing so that’s progress! Dude is missing out!

    • move on. Keep your dignity.

    • I want to hear everyone’s opinion on this topic.
      Q: who initiated the last two dates? if he did, maybe you can not so subtly suggest you meet up for another date.

      • If he accepts, he’s just doing so to get more action. He’s not interested in a LTR at this point. Now if the OP is cool with that, then yeah, can’t hurt to ask. If not, then she’s just going to be dragging it out a little longer.

        • I should clarify that the two dates were not THAT amazing if you know what I mean. Either way, I think I agree with you msus. It’s probably just dragging out the inevitable. He knows I like him.

      • He initiated the 1st date. The 2nd date was pretty mutually decided.

    • topscallop

      My guess is that if you push him for an explanation you’ll get a brush-off/non-answer that will be unsatisfying. I would stop initiating and move on. Even if he’s still responding to you it kind of sounds like he’s doing it to keep you on the backburner.

      • I actually think he’d be responding to be nice, but your points are well taken. I’m slowly stepping away from my phone.

        • Yes. Good idea. This is why I try not to text in the days between dates. Texting drives me crazy. I am so over the whole “Why isn’t he texting me?!” drama.

        • topscallop

          Sorry, that was pretty cynical, I realize. If you’re still interested I think others have made a good suggestion of making one more attempt to hang out and then see what happens.

          • It didn’t read as particularly cynical to me. Backburnering happens. I just didn’t get that sense from him.

    • Andie302

      I don’t think you should ask what happened. Let it go and don’t assume it’s anything you could control/change. If you were being yourself on those dates, and there is something that is keeping him from pursuing more, then there’s no reason to fight the fade. I know this is hard! Try to think of a thing that caused you not to be interested in a guy. Normally there’s probably not a whole lot the guy could’ve done to change your mind, right? The odds of you getting a straight answer aren’t great, and the odds of him contacting you again after you ask are nearly zero.

      • +1

      • Thanks Andie. I know you’re right. When I haven’t felt it, I just haven’t felt it. It would have been hard in most cases to explain it beyond that. He just acted like he liked me more than he seems to now so it stings a little more. At least it was only 2 dates so the damage is minor.

    • I think that two dates is too early to either write off or write on a relationship. Maybe he is only responding to, rather than initiating messages because he’s not that into you. Or maybe he is interested but doesn’t need or want to be in communication as often as you do. Propose another date and see what happens. Use your words: “I’ve enjoyed our two dates and would really like to see you again. If you are interested, let me know. If not, no problem.” If he accepts, and the date happens, and after it is over you think it went well, tell him to plan the fourth date. Make it clear that the ball is in his court and that he needs to take some initiative to keep the train running.

      • That’s what I was thinking. Don’t message to ask “what went wrong” but rather suggest to meet up again because you enjoyed the last two dates. If he’s not receptive to another date, then you’ll know he’s not interested.

        Wow, dating is complicated.

        • I agree that what you’re suggesting is a far better option. I’m trying to put myself out there more, but I know he knows I like him and I really think the writing is on the wall. He knows how to reach me if he wanted to.

    • One of the most helpful things I’ve ever read about dating (at least within the context of heterosexual relationships) is: when women are rejected, they ask “What’s wrong with *me* that he would reject me?” and when men are rejected, they ask, “What’s wrong with *her* that she would reject me?” I try to live out my dating life with that in mind. If he doesn’t appear to want to go on a third date, what’s wrong with him?
      I also don’t let myself get overly emotionally involved until there’s some indication of commitment (i.e. describing desire to meet friends, continuing to date past the fourth date, and/or sleeping together). It’s easy to confuse an emotional connection and actual attachment, so it can be difficult to separate them. I’ve found it’s helpful to do so, at least until you’re both on the same page.

    • Ally

      Could be any number of things. But I’ve typically broken things off after a couple of really good days for two reasons: Either I was dating multiple people and it suddenly became serious with one of them and didn’t feel right multitasking anymore; or, somehow the chemistry/attraction wasn’t there and I’d been hoping over a couple of dates that it would kick in and it didn’t. It’s rarely been that the person did anything “wrong,” per se. But that’s just me.

      I don’t know that I’d personally ask him what happened. I’m not sure you’d get an honest answer and it might just make you feel bad. But, maybe you could run through what happened with a couple of your friends and get some feedback from them. I’ve done that for friends before who either weren’t getting a lot of second dates, or tended to have other problems dating later on.

      Either way, though, sorry that happened and hope you find a gem where you guys are on equal footing.

    • I agree with what everyone else said, and imho, a lot of times it just comes down to someone not liking you as much as they thought they would/used to/etc. It happens. And I think it’s hard for anyone — guys or girls — to say “hey, i just don’t really like you like i thought.”

      • emvee

        This. It is really hard to be like, “Hey I know we’ve gone on a few pretty solid dates, and nothing bad or unsavory has actually happened, but I am just not feeling it.” When the person is, by all accounts, lovely and great, but you just don’t have the chemistry. It’s really tough. But, having been on both ends before, I think people owe it to each other to be honest from beginning to end. It seems cruel to leave someone wondering why.

        • I appreciate it when people are honest about their feelings or rather non-feelings.

          • Agreed with all of the above. Thank you. It just seemed he was feeling it then suddenly he wasn’t. That happens. It’s frustrating not to just hear it straight from someone, but I know it’s also hard to tell people the bad news especially if you know they ARE feeling it. I’ve been much better with 1st date fades. This one hit hard because I would have liked to spend more time with him.

          • And hey, better after two dates than after a few months!

          • FridayGirl is on point.

  • topscallop

    Question for the Popvillage: if you had a few days off for a staycation in DC, what would you do or see? Is there anything cool (and preferably cheap) going on this week or next?

    Not sure: falling back into the habit that is my ex bf, at least while he’s in town. When he leaves again I think I’ll be ready to move on for real, but for right now it’s just fun and comfortable and familiar.

    Weird: my coworker told me that her brother saw me on ok cupid and was interested, but she told him not to message me. I think she felt she was doing me a favor, but I would rather not know about it.

    • binpetworth

      I’ve done the staycation thing a few times, and here’s what I’ve enjoyed:
      1) Do the Franciscan Monastery tour (free) in Brookland
      2) Go to a daytime planetarium show, either at the Rock Creek Nature Center (free) or Air & Space Museum (paid)
      3) Take the MARC to Baltimore and hang out in the Inner Harbor, go to the American Visionary Art Museum (paid), and ride their version of the Circulator around the city for free

    • Be a tourist and take a tour (some of these are free, some not)! Tour DC (the Duck tour has been recommended), the National Cathedral (either the Tea and Tour or the behind the scenes tour), the Botanical Garden, the Library of Congress. Also check out culturaltourism dc . org for other ideas.

  • Hey PoPville: Any thoughts/advice on working at the same company as spouse/SO? Let’s say 300 person non-profit, no direct supervision, at a different level but still working together on some collaborations. What are your thoughts or advice?

    • I have a two pairs of coworkers who are married or engaged and live together in a ~200 person organization. One pair worked together directly on a project for a few months, and they said that was way too much time together. The other pair used to work on the same floor in different departments, and are now on two different floors, and it seems like they’ve always been pretty okay with it. They also said being able to carpool together has been convenient and helped them save money.

    • Are you already working together or are you planning on taking a job with the SO? Because if you are planning on taking a job where the SO works, then you should be upfront about it during the hiring process.

      If you met on the job and want to start dating, then keep it quiet and see how things go. You don’t want to give the perception to your colleagues that you can’t keep your personal life separate from your job.

      I met my boyfriend on the job and it was hard to work together because our responsibilities crossed paths. It sucks having arguments at home about work and was a real negative. Things got so much better when I took another job elsewhere. We never told anyone we were together which I think was really important.

      • That could backfire from another employee’s perspective, though. A friend just found out that a coworker and their superior were, erm, dating, and realized that she shouldn’t have been venting to that friend after at least 1.5, 2 years of venting. She’s now worried about what got back to her superior, is concerned about her job, etc. (Yeah, sure she shouldn’t vent to coworkers, but the venting mostly took place after hours or after the coworker left…)

        • It’s funny that you say that.

          There was a woman at our workplace who was just outright mean and nasty and said the worst things about me to my boyfriend, not knowing at the time that we were dating. Of course when she found out she about died. I think it backfired on her, not us, because she really shouldn’t have been talking trash about a co-worker in the first place.

          For the record, I don’t think one should EVER date their supervisor. The couple in your scenario should have been upfront to everyone at the office or one should have gone somewhere else. That right there is shady.

      • Thinking of taking a job where the SO works – and have been very up front and my SO hasn’t been involved in the hiring process at all (although SO’s co-workers have been involved). Just wondering how to manage a potential work relationship and if anyone has advice on how to make it a positive experience for us but also co-workers.

        • Just make it a point to leave work at work and your personal lives at home. It’s hard because when you come home at night you want to vent about your day to your SO, but doing that blurs the lines. No one at work wants to hear you talk about your relationship details with someone they have to work with. If the organization is large enough, in your case 300+ employees, the it might not make a difference.

  • epric002

    rave: foster sitting an 8-week old lab/chow mix for the WHS.
    rant: foster sitting an 8-week old puppy!!!!! what was i thinking?!
    rave: grouchy corgi is actually being really good with the puppy as long as he’s not nipping at her.
    rant: formerly foster puppy is very confused by this tiny being and doesn’t realize he needs to be gentle with him.
    rave: puppy snuggles.
    rant: waking up at 3:51 am. this was darling husbands fault, as he then awoke the puppy.
    rave: grounds & hounds coffee. lots of it.

    • Q: “rant: foster sitting an 8-week old puppy!!!!! what was i thinking?!”
      A?: “rave: puppy snuggles.”
      I’m already missing 9-week old puppy snuggles. Seriously, that was one of the best weeks of my recent life. I hope you can enjoy at least some of this!

      • I forgot my other rave for today: Gary’s Instagram! It just gets cuter and cuter by the day, if that’s even possible.
        And also, sooo jealous of 8 week old puppy snuggles, epric002!

      • epric002

        we’ll see 🙂 we’re only supposed to have him until he goes to his “real” foster this weekend. i’m pretty sure i’m not a tiny puppy person but figured we should give it a (short term) go and just see how we feel about it after that.

    • Ally

      Awesome! Please post puppy photos 🙂

  • Rave: Smart responsive doctors and adequate health coverage who are saving me from having to give myself injections for the foreseeable future.
    Rant: If/When I get pregnant, it’ll be back to the injections 🙁
    Rave: Tall stack of books set to be devoured. Really enjoying discovering new authors.
    Rant: Parent troubles.

    • Do you have a solid GP….? I really do need to find one, but I hate doctors….

      • This is a specialist/hematologist. I’m with MFA for everything (Primary care and everything else) and have found that while there are many drawbacks the convenience far out ways the frustrations.

        • yeah….you’re right. I’m glad your healthcare is working out for you! It’s a relief. And if you have trouble getting pregnant, two big thumbs up for Dr F at GW 🙂

  • Rant: Having such a hard time getting going again after vacation. Stalled out on the work, home, exercise, everything front.

    Rave: After reading that Shawess did her home decluttering in three (!) hours, I feel like I need her to give me a kick in the pants! Thanks for the inspiration, even though it took me that long just to clean off half my desk.

    • I’ll give you a kick in the pants!
      Set aside a weekend morning. Make sure you have some big boxes and bags on hand and a car/ride to Goodwill. Drink a big cup of coffee. Get your b-tchface (or your own equivalent) on. Tackle one space, then the next. Don’t stop until you’ve seen major progress. Take the stuff you don’t want to the curb or Goodwill. When in doubt, pitch it out. There should be a -lot- of stuff to pitch out. The b-tchface part is important. And so is not stopping ’til your done. If you stop to clean, reminisce, ponder or otherwise dilly dally, it’s game over. Just do it. You’ll thank yourself.

      • Also, you may need more time than I did if your home is bigger than 1100 square feet and if you haven’t decluttered within the last year or so. I’d plan two (non-consecutive) mornings for a bigger job 🙂

        • Thanks, Shawess! I haven’t decluttered within the last decade or so, so maybe it will take me three mornings. B-tchface on!

          Now if only I could stop reading Popville and get to work on work stuff….

      • definitely get CLEAR tubs for storage! We got like 8 large clear tubs at Target so we can see what’s in them once we put them in the attic. Helpful.
        One bin for trash, one for keeping, one for donating (Martha’s Table for us)

        • +1 to this. We used see-through Sterilite 116-quart “Ultra” storage boxes, which I bought online from Amazon, and they suited our needs perfectly.

          • My downfall seems to be the step of actually getting stuff to Goodwill. My basement is overflowing with half-filled, knocked-over boxes that have been almost ready to go for what seems like years. Maybe just hire someone to haul it away? Anyone had any luck with the Vietnam Vets or whoever picking stuff up?

          • I’ve had good luck with Salvation Army – you can schedule a pick up on line

  • Update: Other people are clearly noticing that my young colleague isn’t playing by rules well. He’s done a couple of other things that have raised very big, bright reg flags. I still don’t think he’ll stick around too much longer.
    Rave: Sun! Higher temperatures! Signs of spring!
    Rave: Popvillager help (offline) is making me feel a lot better about making the Big Family Decision. It’s starting to feel like either outcome could be okay, each with (big) pros and cons
    Rant: Puppy has been acting like a wild beast for the last few days — very mouthy and bitey and jumpy. his favorite thing recently has been to jump up from sitting on our laps and bite our faces. It’s actually really scary. We’ve responded by trying to yelp like a wounded dog (this is a thing, I guess?) and then put him in a short time-out if he continues. But he doesn’t want to stop. What gives, Gary?

    • Emmaleigh504

      That’s his Miss Sassy side coming out!

    • Bite him back. The yelping and biting are ways to establish dominance. Definitely don’t ignore it.

      • We definitely need to step up our corrections. In addition to him trying to assert dominance, I wonder if he’s expressing aggression after being cooped up for a lot of the day. We try to let him get about two hours of snuggle and play time a day, at a minimum, but he seems basically insatiable. He hates being alone and he hates not being part of the action if we’re home, ideally right in the center of it.

        • I’d recommend daycare once he gets all his shots. For now, can anyone come over to visit midday? My dog doesn’t bite but he will tear up something meaningless if he’s full of restless energy and not enough walks.

          • We always visit midday and he’s usually okay at lunchtime. It’s the lunchtime to dinnertime stretch that seems to wig him out. We definitely want to put him in day care at least a few days a week but I think he needs to be a bit more fully housetrained first.

          • Dog walker. I believe wagtime does late afternoon/evening walks. Also stop letting him on your lap until the problems are curtailed. Do you use wee pads or the fake grass? I’m not sure how long tiny dogs can realistically hold it, so it could be possible to do daycare without full housetraining. I’d ask them.

          • A late-afternoon dog walker might be the right solution if we can’t do day care yet, and I agree I should call Wagtime ASAP to figure out our options.
            We use wee pads and he generally hits the mark without a problem — and only if he’s not taken out before he has to go. if he’s outside, he goes outside and he seems to really prefer that. I think he really hates going in the playpen/crate area where he spends his alone time. So I guess he’s -mostly- house trained?

          • I think someone was saying on PoPville the other month that small dogs can be trained to use a litterbox. Maybe that would be preferable to the wee pads?

          • Textdoc, at this point, the wee pads are a sort of stopgap measure just in case of accidents because his bladder is so small. The idea is to transition him, as quickly as his bladder will allow, to going outside only. He probably has to go one every 2 hours or so now, but over time he’s supposed to be able to “hold it” a lot longer.
            (On #2, he barely goes inside anymore at all.)

        • I Dont Get It

          I have a friend who is an independent dog walker in Logan and Shaw.

        • I read this after only reading your first update about your co-worker, and was like WTF???!? where do you work? asserting dominance after being cooped up all day and then getting a few hours of snuggling?????

          • Haha you and Fridaygirl both. It occurred to me after writing this that I talk about young co-worker and maniac puppy in almost the same way, which is alarming, perhaps.

      • This is terrible advice. The whole “dominance” theory is totally outdated and can be very harmful to your dog. For a full explanation, just look up Dr. Sophia Yin, Patricia McConnell, Emma Parsons and Turid Rugaas. All of these are positive or R+ trainers and all have great books that any new dog owner should take a look at.
        As far as daycare, it’s fine for some dogs, but for others it’s completely overwhelming and can actually exacerbate unwanted behaviors. I’m not saying don’t do it, but just do your homework about the daycare and monitor your dog for behavior changes. Sometimes owners mistake a dog being tired from stress and then problem behaviors come out in full force later on (like leash reactivity, etc).

        • FWIW, I think Gary is probably just lonely and filled with puppy energy, and we need to find a better way for him to get his fill of attention and play and exercise. He was a little bitey before, but in the last two days that has gotten really out of hand, and I’m guessing it’s because we came home a couple of hours later than usual on both nights. I’m not sure if a second walk or day care is the right solution, but I think he needs a little more time than we can give him at the moment.

        • Unless you know the dog’s background, and this is a new puppy after all, there is no way to tell if daycare well be stressful or not. Wagtime actually does a trial day to see if the dog is a good fit, and I’m sure Shawess could monitor as well. The puppy sounds like he has separation anxiety, so I suggested daycare. I also like using a special toy in my case a Kong when I was leaving for work, and something like that may help for evening hours also. I take it away when I get home and hide it.

        • epric002

          +1 please don’t bite your dog back. it is very common for puppies to be mouthy and bitey. continue to do what you’re doing (a high pitched ouch/yelp, and ignoring him immediately after he does it). he can only do face bites if he’s in your lap/you’re holding him, right? i’d avoid doing greetings where you give him an opportunity to face bite until you can get it under control. we had a 50lb foster puppy who was a leg nipper- i know how frustrating it can be, but you’re doing the right things by yelping/immediately ceasing interaction/time outs.

          • Thanks to you all. He appears (at lunchtime) to have progressed from face biting to foot/shoe/ankle biting and that actually -really- hurts. So it’s very reassuring to hear this is likely just a puppy phase that will pass if we keep doing the things we’re doing. I’m also going to keep following anon dachshund owner and flieswithhoney’s advice below.

      • Read the first “update.” Didn’t read about the puppy. Totally thought this conversation was about the co-worker and not the dog until I got down to “get about two hours of snuggle and play time.” HAHAHA.

    • Gary sounds a lot like what mine was like as a puppy. She was pretty annoying for a while with biting, and could NEVER get enough attention. What we were taught in puppy class and what worked for us was the “yelp” or “No!” to startle her to stop after every bite and then immediately ignore for a brief period … and to make sure we were consistent. If she was on my lap, she’d get put down on the floor. If we were playing, I’d turn my back or briefly go into the other room if she was still being crazy. But when she was being gentle, she got lots of attention. I have to admit, there were times I got frustrated and tried biting her back, but that seemed to get her even more worked up. I’ve read that “dominance” training isn’t that great for dachshunds since they tend to fight back. There are lots of positive training tips on the internet if you look up “bite inhibition.” This phase will pass!

      • anon dachshund owner, I’ve totally been following your advice on this and looked up bite inhibition training techniques at your recommendation. It’s mostly working, but I think I’m realizing we probably need to just get him some extra daily attention too. It’s really only a big issue after we’ve been away for 4 hours+. He “greets” us with face bites and can’t seem to stop no matter what we do. Even after yelps and growls and time outs, he wants to face bite. I’m hoping this phase will indeed pass — and quickly!

        • It takes time, so don’t give up! I thought my pup would never learn, but it eventually clicked. The frustration is worth it (and it was so frustrating at times). As for the bitey greeting, I used to ignore her right when I got home (supposedly it helps prevent separation anxiety if you don’t make coming back a big deal), and then take her immediately outside to do her business so there was never a real opportunity for biting since she was distracted and my head wasn’t down low. Also, I highly recommend the second walk, it was a lifesaver for us during puppyhood. A tired puppy is much better behaved 🙂 Hang in there!

    • Have you tried “bad dog” in a mean growly voice in addition to time outs? I used that for very undesirable behavior and yelping + ignoring the dog by turning my back on her in response to attention seeking behavior (whining and playful nipping). My trainer also suggested putting your dog on its back to reinforce you as the alpha after bad behavior. Good luck! Puppies are adorable jerks.

  • Quotia Zelda

    Rant: I feel a little bit like I’m drowning at work. It should get better after this week as I finish some projects, but there will be a lot on my plate generally through May.

  • Emmaleigh504

    Rant: More insomnia, so tired, can’t concentrate on work.
    Rant: Measles in DC. It didn’t come from the Disneyland outbreak, came from international travel.
    Rave: Parents vaccinated me and my sister when we were wee.

  • Rave: had a nice dinner with my cousin last night. We both admitted that we need to make plans more often.
    Rant: Mid-year review today. I’m always more concerned about these things than I should be, but I’m not always my best advocate.
    Rave: spin class and drinks with my sister tonight.
    Rant: restructuring is coming and some staff have been told about the strategy for it, but my group hasn’t. The outcome won’t be announced until July, so it’s going to be five months of fear and dread.
    Rave: I love my recreational-not-really-a-sport sports league teammates. They’re some of my best friends.

  • Rant: Can’t decide between installing mini-split or high velocity AC. Both have very different pros and cons. I hate making decisions like this.

    Rave: No matter what decision we make the house will be cooler come summer.

    • Andie302

      If you can’t decide flip a coin. If you’re really indifferent then go with the outcome. If you have a strong immediate reaction to the outcome (ugh…I didn’t really want that option after all) then go with the other one. I’ve made big decisions that I’m really torn on this way (and tons of small ones) and haven’t had a bad outcome yet.

      • Andie I’ve used this technique to help in decision making in the past & was actually going to recommend it to Shawess to use as she and her husband are thinking through their decision.

        • We will probably do some version of this, since we’re both as fond of gut checks as we are of pro-cons lists 🙂

          • Might help for you and your husband to do this separately & then compare results.
            Pro/con lists are useful but I’m definitely a “go with my gut” decision maker!

          • A/C Slater – apologies for diverting your thread ~

          • MPinDC, that’s exactly what we’re doing. It’s a bit trickier at this point, though, because we don’t have all of the information we need for either of our lists or or guts and don’t know when we’re getting it. So right now all of the listing and gut-checking is fairly hypothetical. Blech.
            And sorry, AC Slater!

          • hammers

            agree with MPinDC–go with your gut!

          • So, out of curiosity, what would you do if your gut and your spouse’s gut disagreed? Hypothetically, of course 🙂

          • Flip another coin!
            Seriously, your guts may be saying different things at the moment but doesn’t mean that you don’t, or won’t, agree on what is best for the both of you. Or all three of you (including Gary).

          • MPinDC, I think you’re right. I just need to be patient for now. Easier said than done!

    • I have a 3 story rowhouse and when I need to replace HVAC I’d go with mini-split. Even after some new duct work to improve flow, my 3rd floor is always hot in summer while the ground floor is freezing.

      But whichever you go with, if you are sensitive to sound, look for something quite. The outside HVAC fan for my basement apt. “hums” so that it wakes me up all night. (sleeping on 2nd floor)

    • It depends on your set up. If you don’t have any duct work yet, definitely go with mini-splits. If you do have ducts, I would decide based on efficiency and cost (because efficiency drives costs). Mini-splits are great for having lots of “zones” so if you have guest rooms you don’t use regularly and some rooms you use a lot you can always condition those to a comfortable level.

  • Rave: I may not be lucky in love, but I am lucky in my friends and family. Had a couple of friends reach out to me yesterday and promise to plan some fun things to keep me busy. I have a hard time asking for help and reaching out to people (the depression talking, I always worry about being a bother to people) and I really needed that boost.
    Rave: Exchanged a final few e-mails with the ex. Most friends said I shouldn’t, but I’m glad I did. He was much more open and communicative than he had ever been before, and while I’m still sad and hurt I’m less angry/crushingly depressed. I’m still up and down, but I feel a bit more at peace, and hopefully can heal better from now on. I’m glad we ended things on a better note, at least.

  • jim_ed

    Rave: Close friends daughter born happy and healthy last night. Also, baby didn’t get a stupid name. which is always nice.
    Rave: Reading all the dating horror stories on PoP are like the world’s greatest marriage PSA. Thanks for validating my life choice, you guys!
    Rant: Was hoping to get one more year out of our old truck, but doesn’t seem to be in the cards. The new ones we like are pricey. Decisions, decisions…

  • Rant: My fiancee’s family ALWAYS has drama, nearly all of which is avoidable and petty. A lot of it is passive agressive BS.
    Rave: They’re literally on the other side of the world from me
    Rant: She’s with them right now, so that’s why I’m hearing about it constantly.
    Rave: my family (both immediate and extended) is very drama-free. So is my fiancee (except when she gets dragged into family disputes)

  • skj84

    Rant: if my coworker manapains me one more time I’m going to punch him in the nads. Seriously he needs to pay attention to his own shit, and stay out of my buisness.

    • What is manapains?

      • Emmaleigh504

        that’s a typo it is “mansplain” where a man feels the need to explain everything to a woman or tell her how to do things “properly” even though she’s perfectly capable and is an expert, because her poor lady brain can’t handle it.

  • Weird: My dog, who barks every time any person comes to the front door – or even just inside the yard – did not make a peep for a UPS delivery today. The delivery was a case of cat food!

  • Rave: Barre class last night. Sore in a good way.
    Rant: I am not sure if my second date is happening this weekend. I know where we decided to go, but I haven’t heard anything else about it like what time to meet. We are supposed to see a show that has a set date and time. Is texting the night before the date too late to confirm and flesh out details?

    • I’m confused — why would you (or the other party) wait until the night before to sort out the details?

      • IDK, that’ what I’m asking.

        • So the situation is something like “We’ve made plans to go to the 9:30 Club to see [artist name], and doors open at ____, but we haven’t made plans on when/where to meet?”
          If the activity itself is confirmed, then I can see how sorting out the details could happen later… but given that you said you’re not sure whether the date is even happening, better to follow up if the other party isn’t forthcoming.

    • I personally like to confirm details several days out, because I’m a planner and I like to have things pretty much set and confirmed, especially if I have other plans for the day. This is doubly the case for dates, so I know they’re actually happening. I always figure if a guy is bothered by that, then he’s probably not someone I’d get along with for a relationship.

    • Anonynon

      Its funny to see how many people are so tied up in texting (been there myself before)..seems like everyone just needs to work on their communication skills a little 🙂 but yeah i always like setting up the date (a day or two in advance, don’t want it to be hanging over your head too long), not much texting before the date,send a confirmation text (but not asking “are we still on”, instead say “is it X O’clock yet?”, “Looking forward to seeing you later”), meet.

    • I’m usually a night before confirmer but if you’re going to see a show that you need to get tickets to, I’d go ahead and try to confirm a few days in advance.

    • hammers

      “Hey, how are you? Are we still on for Saturday? When/where would you like to meet?”

    • Call the person. Sheesh.

      • Well obvs going to do that eventually. Timing is everything.

        • hammers

          For me, when doing things like planning dates, I just try to follow my own sense of timing and do what feels comfortable. The reason being: if someone is worried I texted them (gasp) too soon or too late or whatever, then they probably aren’t for me. The early stages of dating are getting to know a person, I dont really like walking on eggshells. BUT to answer your ultimate question RE timing, its Wednesday, I think you have from now until the afternoon of the date to try to clarify details. Monday probably would have been too early, but Wednesday is fine, hey, you’re a busy lady!

          • Thanks for the sound advice, hammers! I like asking for advice from strangers to get another perspective on what is “socially acceptable.”

        • “Timing is everything.”
          How so? Do you think the success of this romantic pairing hinges on whether you call at the “right” time? I doubt it does. (And if it does then it’s probably not a good match.) You sound like you’re nervous or anxious about it and maybe overthinking it.

  • palisades

    Rave: Fresh haircut and new sunglasses made for a pleasant drive to work this morning.
    Rave: Nats are starting up SO SOON! BE EXCITED EVERYONE!

    • jim_ed

      Due to their play performances, my Nats excitement is more cautious optimism than the unbridled giddiness I felt leading up to the Wizards this year. Also, I have a nagging feeling that Yunel Escobar will be a gigantic failure (in the resigning Chrisian Guzman vein, rather than the Wily Mo Pena vein). I also think (hope?) Rizzo has one big move left in the holster before the season starts.

      • palisades

        Well I think most people realize Escobar is more of a stand-in than anything else. He’s certainly not our long-term answer. And let’s be honest, if our biggest concern is finding 1 long-term player, then I think we’re looking pretty good. I’m also a Red Sox fan, and that team is a hot mess. I’m not sure what else Rizzo could do. We seem to have everything locked up. Maybe trade away Zimm or Stras?
        As for the Wiz, sorry about them as of late. My roommate is a fan and I have to sit through their sad performances the last couple nights.

        • jim_ed

          Escobar is definitely a stand-in, but I don’t want a stand-in on a team that should be favorited to win the World Series. I would absolutely trade Zimm or Stras for the right return package. I would package Stras and Desi to the Cubs for Kris Bryant and Addison Russell in a hillbilly heartbeat if given the opportunity.
          Yeah, the Wiz are slumping at the moment, and they’re likely going t get drilled by the Hawks tonight. These things happen, you just hope the all star break recharges their batteries and they come out on fire for the 2nd half. They also could stand to make some trades to bring in some bench scoring.

          • palisades

            We’ll see. The Nats did just fine with Cabrera last year. I can’t imagine the Cubs would give up incredible prospects for a rental like Stras and a soon-to-be-oldie in Desmond. I have a feeling that we’ll stick with this team for a month or two into the season before another team becomes desperate enough for an ace and then we let our trades loose.

      • palisades

        Also, a lot of my giddiness regarding the Nats has to do with more than just seeing them win a shitload of games. I love me some baseball and summertime hot dogs, no matter who is playing.

  • Rave: Please, please, please can we get a conversation going on the rich couple who left their kids in a cold car for over an hour while they went wine tasting at the Ritz Carlton. Love to hear the comments on that one!

  • I Dont Get It

    Rant/Rave: I was talking to IDGI SR last night and he said Lucy the Rat was ailing. His wife thinks she is depressed over Ethel. I say she’s depressed because she knows Ethel is in the freezer.
    Rant: Senior Citizen dogs that randomly bark at night.
    Rave: Turbotax. I think I did my taxes in less than 20 minutes since it imports my W2 data and retains other info from last year.
    Rave: I got the name of the delicious sweet potato variety I’ve been buying from Yes Market wrong. They are called Oriental and have purple skins and white flesh. So sweet!

  • Rant: co-workers who know I am doing the work of literally two people, but are still refusing to help with little things they could easily do (and still leave at 5.

    Rant? I think I’m accidentally doing the fade out to a guy I met online and went on 3 dates with. He was really nice, but I wasn’t totally interested, and then actually got too busy to reach out. It’s been a few days, so I don’t know if I should just let it go or if I should say something to be nice.

  • Rant: the family dog died last night. Although she was *technically* my parent’s dog, I had custodial rights to her as well. Regardless, I’m heartbroken, so is the rest of my family, especially my father. She was a sweet fluffly friend and brought us so much joy for ten years. I wasn’t ready for her to go.
    Rave: i toasted her life with a delicious dunkin donut this morning.
    Rave: keeping busy at work, dating, and at life in general. I really don’t have any downtime to dwell on my sadness until the week after next.

  • Rant: Bad executives.
    Responding to my request with a note that basically says “you didn’t give me enough time – let’s talk about how you can be better organized” is not appropriate if I: a) gave you notice of the deadline – literally – 47 days ago; b) reminded you again of what needed to be done 20 days ago; c) set a meeting (originally to be held two weeks ago, which you declined to attend), then set another meeting date (also declined BY YOU at last minute), and then set another meeting date (which we just decided to do without you); and d) also sent two entirely separate reminders over the last month.
    Being “experienced” apparently doesn’t mean actually being able to do the job. ARGH!

  • Question: I’ve always had the thermostat programmed to be 73 when we’re home and awake, and 67 when we’re away or sleeping. Occasionally my girlfriend would complain about being cold and we’d bump it up a couple degrees, but generally it’s been comfortable. Suddenly this week we’ve been roasting! I checked the settings and nothing’s changed. Any idea what could be causing this?

    • I’m not sure, but have the same situation here. I wonder if it’s because the outside temps have been higher, so not as much heat is escaping outside?

      • But it was fine back in October, or early last spring, or other times when the temps were higher.

        • Still not sure, but I’m curious — do you also have a Nest like we do? We just put ours in a few months ago, so I assumed it had something to do with it. I’m realizing 73 does not always equal 73.

        • Could it be the sun coming in? I find that this time of the year — with the sun low in the sky for a good part of the afternoon and evening — it can get really warm, even in places that don’t get a ton of sunlight the rest of the year. If the thermostat is reading the temperature out of reach of the sun, it might still “think” it’s holding the right temperature, even if the rest of the home is quite warm.

  • Follow-up to Rant from last week/Rave: Had the talk with the guy last night (finally….continued to put it off). All is well – I think I was letting my trust issues/insecurities mess with my head a little too much and convinced myself he was thinking of bailing on me when all the other signs are pointing in the opposite direction. I hate that it’s so hard for me to have an open conversation about my feelings with someone I like/care about so much. Feeling so much better now and like I can move forward giving 100% instead of holding back “just in case…”

    • Sometimes you just need to go all in and see where life takes you, admitting you might be hurt in the process. Glad you made it through the Talk. Hope things work out well for you both!

  • All – I need some serious help. I am looking for recommendations for companies to do:
    1 – tree and stump removal in my front yard
    2 – rip out chain link and install new fence in backyard.

    Every company I have found that looks good say they don’t work in NE DC. I am really having a hard time finding someone!

    Also what is the process for fence removal/replacement in a row house? Do I need to get my neighbor’s permission/approval of fence design?

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