Random Reader Rant and/or Revel

Photo by PoPville flickr user  Eric P.

You can talk about whatever is on your mind – quality of life issues, a beautiful tree you spotted, scuttlebutt, or any random questions/thoughts you may have. But please no personal attacks and no need to correct people’s grammar. This is a place to vent and/or celebrate things about daily life in DC.

311 Comment

  • Rant/Rave: Health scare saturday evening meant hours in the ER but with a positive outcome for my health.

    Rave: Otherwise had a great weekend hanging with friends.

    Rant: Different doctors telling me different things about necessary meds for if/when I’m pregnant. Some say blood thinners 2X/day for the duration, others so there’s no need….

    Rave: Ignoring everything and heading to the barn. One benefit of being unemployed is riding people’s horses who are employed and can’t get out to the barn.

  • Emmaleigh504

    Rant: Feeling old today, woke up this morning and everything hurts.
    Rave: don’t much care because I’M GOING TO SWEDEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Rant: Christmas decorations – soo not into this. I wish I could take the month of December and just go somewhere that doesn’t deal with all this.

    • Really? They’re so pretty! We decorate for Hanukkah because we like lights and the festive vibe 🙂

      • Emmaleigh504

        fairy lights are just about the only part of Xmas I like. My mom always decorates for Ayyám-i-Há with lights b/c fairy lights are fun.

    • I can understand not liking _tacky_ Christmas displays, but not liking Christmas decorations at all? There’s a long tradition across multiple religions and cultures of doing something around the solstice to try to bring some cheer and light to what’s normally a dark and discouraging time. I don’t like the commercialization of Christmas, nor do I like tacky Christmas displays, but I love (tasteful) lights and greenery.

      • Emmaleigh504

        lol I like the tacky displays, though not as much since those inflatable things have started taking over. Anything with lights, moar lights! and for every holiday!

    • I detest everything about Christmas in America with the heat of a thousand burning suns. But I loved this season when I lived in Germany. There were lights everywhere and yule trees and gluckwein and chestnuts and caroling in the squares that was tasteful and not always in your face. It was a way of embracing the winter season and the long nights and giving people a good reason to spend more time outdoors in public spaces even though it was very cold. The whole shopping and gifts and sales was just not part of it (outside of some small crafts markets, but they were like an afterthought). I’ve tried to remember some of that feeling as I walk around DC (even though it’s too warm to feel like winter!) and tried to block out the commercialism as much as I can.

      • Not sure how long ago you were in Germany, but that Christmas commercialism is in full swing in Europe. Just came back from that part of the world and all I saw in the stores was sales, sales and more sales for Christmas. Stores were mobbed – didn’t seem any different that the US.

        • I was there for a couple of years about 4 or 5 years ago. Maybe I avoided some of it b/c I didn’t go to the big stores and didn’t watch much tv.

          • epric002

            you can do that here too 🙂 i highly recommend it, in fact.

          • See, that’s the thing – I don’t shop or watch much TV here, either, but Christmas is IN MY FACE from early November (at least) until January. It’s just hard to escape it here, and I find it’s the worst most commercial parts that are the hardest to get away from. In Germany and Switzerland you sort of had to seek that part out.

          • epric002

            i really don’t like the holiday season creep/crass commercialization either. i actually just started thinking about my experience this year and realized it hasn’t bothered me at all. i think that it’s b/c i pretty much do all of my shopping online now, so i’m not forced to see the displays/listen to the music. i also commute using public transportation so i don’t even have to hear it on the radio. what parts/places/aspects of it are particularly hard for you to escape?

          • Grocery stores (the worst!), the 1.5 hours of TV a week I do watch (I watch 1-2 hours a week so I don’t have cable or tivo, there are commercials), random flyers in my mailbox, museum lobbies, book stores, coffee shops, the lobby of my apartment building. Already today I’ve deleted 5+ work emails about holiday charity drives, caroling, and parties. Count the number of santa hats you see this week (metro station attendant, street sense guy, barista, random pedestrians etc.). You just can’t get away from it. If it was just Zoolights and houses with candles in in windows and some winter outdoor gatherings with cocoa it would be great. But it’s fricking Santa and cartoon reindeer and pressure to shop everywhere you turn.

          • epric002

            oh now i am totally over being asked to pay to attend work holiday parties (i’ve declined every invitation), but my TV watching is so sporadic and usually netflixesque things so i don’t have to deal with commercials. i don’t think the petworth safeway has been very bad, i honestly don’t even recall whether they’ve been playing xmas music. if there have been oodles of santa hats i’ve totally missed them but i will be on the lookout from now on. can you order your groceries for delivery? good luck! it’s almost over 🙂

          • Emmaleigh504

            Some howI have gotten to miss most of the xmas stuff this year (knock on wood), mostly just commercials for me. I did go into a store with bad xmas music on way to loud and had to leave immediately. If I ever go postal it will because of loud, bad xmas music.

  • Linc Park SE

    Rant: not enough comments on PoP – WAKE UP POP-PEOPLE!! I love reading your comments – so get to work.

  • Rant: Flight delayed this morning which is likely going to make me miss my connecting flight to MN.
    Rant: Robert Mcculloch and his bullshit! I hope the bar revokes his license. I hope everyone that does not understand, didn’t understand or did not want to understand can see what a piece of shit Robert Mcculloch is. So this guy releases this huge document dump but inadvertently leaves out the testimony of a key witness, Dorian Johnson, who was with Michael Brown on the day he was shot to death. Johnson’s testimony remained solid throughout the process. It is clear he did not want an indictment by his actions, all he had to do was given the grand jury Johnson’s testimony and there would have been a trial. Again, I am not saying the outcome would have been different but the process has to be fair to all and this guy clearly did not want an indictment. So sad.

  • hispanicandproud

    Rave: Picked to run in the Cherry Blossom 10 mile run this spring. It will be right smack between two marathons so I’ll concentrate on only having fun!

    Rave: Fantastic weekend with friends. Can’t ask for a better group of friends in DC!

    Rave: Holiday lunch was fantastic yesterday at my place. Played Loteria-Mexicana and had a blast. Won the jackpot!

    Rave: Concert tonight!

  • Rave: Such a fun weekend! Birthday party, complete with bounce house that my toddler LOVED; pre-Hanukkah fun with my sister, brother-in-law, and some dear friends. Wish there were more leftover latkes! Had lots of fun at zoo lights last night–love that it’s just a fifteen minute walk from the house!
    Rant: My little girl can’t quite tell me what’s wrong when she’s upset. Last night, she fell apart just before dinner and was just a wreck. We finally tried some ibuprofen and she settled down and happily ate her dinner, though that process delayed the evening so badly that she went to bed 45 minutes late and then had trouble settling into sleep on her own. Thank goodness she slept fine once asleep. Dunno if she had a sore throat from her cold or what, but she was NOT HAPPY.
    Rant/Rave: Got a garmin vivofit from my sister for Hanukkah. It seems pretty nifty, but I’m still trying to figure it out. Managed to clear out all of yesterday’s steps in the process of trying to sync it to the computer last night. But then realized that it had synced, but somehow thought that was all from December 31, 1989? So confused. I’m sure I’ll figure it out. Was pleased to see that I logged over 12,000 steps without even trying. That was pretty cool.

  • Rave: Surgery was a big success and now I’m home recovering for a few days.
    Rave: One of my closest friends had a baby today. Mom and baby are well, and the parents gave baby girl a really nice name. I really appreciate that my friends pick such nice names for their kids.
    Rave: I just finished about a week’s worth of home-related tasks in less than an hour because I’m actually home to do them. Feeling really accomplished!
    Rant: Still really tired. I’ll probably have to take a 2-hour nap to make up for this hour of “exertion.”
    Rave: I can take a 2 hour nap. And another one later if I want to. Recovery is kind of fun. I don’t even need the pain meds anymore.

  • Rant: Date on Friday cancelled 10 minutes before we were supposed to meet. I was already on my way!
    Rave: Called a new friend I met at a party the weekend before and had a great lady date. It turned out to be a really fun night.
    Rant: Sunday brunch date (different guy) also cancelled last minute! I don’t know why I even bother anymore.

    • Ten minutes beforehand?!? Wow, that is exceedingly lame. Did he even offer any kind of excuse?
      How about Sunday guy?

      • Friday guy said he had a family thing and that we’d reschedule. Trying to give him the benefit of the doubt, but it’s difficult. And Sunday guy was just hungover.

        • Anonynon

          I sympathize with the hung over guy…i tried to meet up with a girl iv been seeing saturday night and failed (drunk) thinking sunday we could hang out, only to realize i was useless and super hung over and sore (went to a trampoline park saturday). I didn’t even bother to follow up with the plans, assuming she was pretty hung over too…but i am going to try to schedule something for this week. Lesson learned, don’t try to schedule plans the day after going out to drink a lot!

    • Has this happened to you consistently or was it someone else on here who had a string of last-minute cancellations? Either way, it is awful behavior on these people’s parts. If only people like that broadcast their poor manners on their foreheads or in their online profiles- all innocent people could avoid them!

      • I think this is the first time a date has cancelled so last minute. I do remember someone else ranting about it before but I can’t remember who.
        I know! So inconsiderate. Hmph.

        • skj84

          I had a date stand me up. It sucks. Sorry this happened to you.

        • *I* was recently ranting about being stood up, and it had to do with last minute communications that I wasn’t technologically capable of receiving, although we’d already discussed where/when to meet, and she could have just texted me.
          Sorry to hear about SparklingKittyTaco’s unfortunate experience. It just means the stand-upper is either irresponsible, an a-hole, or… well, I can’t think of anything else.

      • I’ve also had a few last-minute cancellations or was stood-up, and ranted about it here. It sucks! It’s rude, inconsiderate, lame, and most of all, very immature. I’m still a fan of online dating, but I’m currently taking a hiatus, at least until the new year.

        • Agreed that it’s rude, inconsiderate, lame, and immature!
          Sadly, I took a hiatus and this is what I came back to. Sigh.

          • I was thinking about giving it another try, but I have to say that your stories and LittleN’s are giving me pause!

          • I do agree with littlen that people seem to back off on dating during the holidays. I’ve generally had positive experiences before this month, so I would totally give it another go if you’re on the fence! 🙂

    • Andie302

      So sorry this happened 🙁

    • Emmaleigh504

      Yay lady date night! Hurray for new friends!

    • What! That’s ridiculous. Grrrr to getting stood up, so not okay. 🙁 Especially 10 minutes beforehand… Ugh.
      We should go out to things together sometime and try to meet guys. Like meetup events or something. Change things up from online dating!

  • Rave: More success with lacto-fermentation – this time I made kefir. Very easy, very tasty.
    Rave: The internet. I had a pair of glasses that started slipping and tightening the small screws didn’t help. The internet said I could try heating the plastic with a blow dryer and gently bending for a better fit. Success!
    And rave: Made pho this weekend, also read two good books (Secret Keeper and Miss Peregrine’s School for Peculiar Children)

  • Bear

    Rant: Took almost two hours to get to work today because of multiple fails on MARC, MetroBus, and the green and red lines. Just could not catch a break this morning. Should’ve just went back home when they announced the MARC trains were suspended…

  • Anyone know of a place in DC that carries Vernor’s ginger ale? I’ve been craving it badly and am not heading home to the midwest for the holidays so was hoping to find it here. So far I’ve been SOL – I could have sworn I saw it somewhere when I wasn’t looking, but now I don’t remember where.

  • Pablo Raw

    Rave: Decided to buy the leather jacket I wanted and found it was on sale for $100 less!
    Rave: I met Blithe yesterday! as a result to that I’m smarter and I understand this city much better!
    Rave: Guitar chocolate 🙂
    Rave: Roller Derby is coming back to DC (they’ve been playing near Dulles)
    Rave: Photo contests time, hard to choose what to send
    Rant: not that impressed with Izakaya Restaurant, but
    Rave: Sapporo 🙂

    • Blithe

      Have you resolved your “cannibalism” question yet? lol

    • SFT

      I have the same rave. I just bought the leather jacket that I’ve been drooling over for a year now. Found it on sale and then found a 20% promo code for all sale merch – it was a friggin steal. I can’t get enough of it!!!!!!!! I wish leather didn’t come from cows. Poor cows!

      • Pablo Raw

        By the time they made my jacket, the cow was already dead for a long time! and also the cow was not killed for making my jacket, but for the meat. I’m not feeling guilty. Not a all.

  • Rant: My color came out a lot darker than what I asked for. I really hate it and just want to hide, but everyone keeps commenting on it. 🙁 At least they’re being nice about it?
    Rant: My sister just told me that her whole family has been knocked out by a nasty stomach flu. And which is probably coming my way, since I spent all weekend there.
    Rave: At least I have some warning that it’s coming? I’m picking up some Gatorade on the way home today.

  • jim_ed

    Rant: Sick with some virus that feels just like a bad case of strep throat. It’s day 5 and still hasn’t relented.
    Rave: My parents visited this weekend and it went pretty smooth. Had a great dinner at Osteria Morini, who were very accommodating with us bringing our infant.
    Rant: All the shootings in northern Petworth this week. Hopefully MPD has some answers at the community meeting this week.

  • Rave: Hopefully getting condo docs today. Last step before closing!
    Rave: Trying out muay thai for the first time tonight.
    Revel: Soon to be late breakfast: steak, potatoes and spinach.

    Question: I’m taking a friend to have her baby mid-Jan. She’s out in Bethesda, so I figured I’d stay out there closer to her due date, and I know to have a bag packed….but what goes in the bag? What else am I missing?

    • Bag for you or for her?

      For you: depends on if you’ll be staying overnight and where – at her house? at hospital?

      For her: depends on what kind of delivery she’s planning and where she’ll be delivering (hospital, home, birth center)

      • Bag for her…I always see mention of bags when people have a baby (tv mostly, but hey, not much else to reference). She’s going to a hospital, but I’m not sure what kind of delivery. I’ll have to ask.

        • Don’t bother. She has no idea what kind of delivery she’ll have. She might have *plans*, but it’ll go how it goes. That’s the most pernicious myth of the childbirth industry (and it’s most definitely an industry), that the mother has any control over how it’s going to go.
          She’ll almost certainly want to pack her own bag– choose her own PJs, toiletries, etc. But if you can get some lanolin lotion for her, that’s something that the hospital doesn’t always provide, and is desperately needed.

          • But if she was scheduled for a c-section, is that likely to change? Given her age as a first time mother, I imagine she is considered at least somewhat high risk. Not sure if that affects delivery options.
            Lanolin lotion, is that for her post-baby belly?

            Thanks for the help.

          • Is she actually scheduled for a C-section?

          • epric002

            there are certainly hospitals and birthing centers that, true medical emergencies aside, let women have the types of births they plan. in fact, if the hospital/doctor/birthing center doesn’t support a mother’s delivery preferences (again, true medical issues/emergencies aside) then she may want to find one who does.

          • About half the women I know who scheduled a c-section ended up delivering before the date, without surgical intervention. And more than half the women I know who planned “natural” births ended up with interventions, ranging from an epidural when their breathing techniques didn’t hold up to 24 hours of hard labor, to emergency c-sections.
            As for “finding a place to support your delivery preference”, correct me if I’m wrong, epric002, but I thought you did not have children? Of people who have gone through L&D, about 30% got what they expected, and they will tell you that you *can* control it. But the majority knows that it’s pretty much out of your hands once the medicos get involved. So the best course is just to roll with it.

          • epric002

            you’re right, i don’t have kids. that doesn’t mean that i’m unaware that there are in fact hospitals/doctors/birthing centers who will support a woman’s desired birth plan. and i disagree that “the best course is just to roll with it”, for almost any medical experience. i know a number of women who were determined to have their desired experience and they made it happen. i don’t think it’s fair to discount those women who have L&D preferences and achieve them (again, medical issues not withstanding). to say that it’s out of your [a woman’s] hands is part of the reason that women don’t end up with the birthing experiences that they want/need. just as i believe that everyone should take ownership for the medical care they receive (find a doctor/practice who addresses and treats your medical issues with the same philosophy you do) i think that women who have specific, desired birth experiences/outcomes should be their own advocates for that type of care. i’m not at all criticizing women whose plans can’t be realized, btw.

          • Your entire (unfounded) argument is cause of SO MANY women’s negative experiences. If women went into L&D knowing that it’s unplannable, they wouldn’t beat themselves up afterwards for “failing” to achieve that perfect, beautiful, “natural” birth.
            Yes, people should take ownership of their health decisions. Yes, they should be educated. But to insist that women can make it happen the way they want it to happen is to set them up to fail.
            You say “there are ‘in fact’ hospitals that will support a birthplan.” No. There are doctors and birthing centers who SAY they will. But they are exactly as interested in their liability as any other provider. Their intervention numbers are lower partly because their clientele are self-selecting, and partly they reject even slightly elevated risk patients. Please stop promoting this fairy tale. It leads to mothers entering a very difficult phase of their lives (infant care) bitter and angry and sad that their birth plans didn’t pan out. I’ve heard more than one new mother say “if I couldn’t even manage the birth, how am I going to manage parenting?” And that’s due to having heard over and over that they could “plan” the birth. For the majority, it’s a false and harmful message.

          • epric002

            i did not “insist that women can make it happen the way they want it to”. i said that ” i know a number of women who were determined to have their desired experience and they made it happen”. i’m also not “promoting a fairy tale”, nor do i think it’s a “false and harmful message” for women to plan a birth that they need/want. no one’s plans, of any kind, are guaranteed to pan out- that’s just life. that doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t ever plan things. it sounds like you think i’m a “perfect, beautiful, ‘natural’ birth” advocate. i don’t especially care what kind of birth a woman has, but there’s a huge vast plane of options in b/n a perfectly planned and orchestrated exactly-as-i-desire birth, and “don’t bother…it’ll go how it goes…it’s a myth…that the mother has any control”. i think the message that a woman has no say in her L&D options is as dangerous as a misguided belief that if you don’t have the exact birth you envisioned that somehow you’re a failure.

          • There has to be some sort of middle ground. Yes, in a true medical emergency the docs will do what they have to do to keep the mom and baby safe, regardless of previously expressed preferences. That is as it should be. But why is it such a crazy idea that the mom’s wishes should be known, and if possible, respected?

        • If she’s going to have a c-section, bring some supportive pillows for recovery. I found the My Brest Friend pillow to be fantastic; I used it for nursing, but it will help even with just holding and bottle feeding the baby. The Boppy Pillow won’t provide enough support.
          After my c-section, I didn’t put on bottoms until leaving the hospital. I could barely walk, so a robe over a comfortable top was fine for shuffling through the halls. Hospitals are cold, so bring warm and soft things, but you won’t need much, really. Pack maybe 2 pairs of bottoms, like a pair of pj pants and a pair of yoga pants. Pack a few more tops, and a nice robe. The hospital will very likely provide pads, the mesh underwear (which is perfect), slipper socks, diapers and wipes. Be prepared for her to stay longer than expected.
          Bring some snacks for the post-partum room (I was STARVING), and all the chargers you’ll need. Travel size toiletries. Bring nice lotion for her hands and feet. Download a white noise app on your phone, or bring a travel sized sound machine – hospitals are awful places to try to sleep, and this will help.
          Be sure you know how to use the car seat (she will need some help, especially if she has a c-section). Bring an outfit for the baby to come home in, and a warm blanket to put over the secured car seat straps.

          Lanolin is for her nipples, if they are sore from nursing. It can be a lifesaver!
          A scheduled c-section can change under some circumstances. With my first, the section was scheduled before my due date because I needed to deliver early for medical reasons. With my second, the section is scheduled as a back-stop; if I go into labor first, the scheduled section gets canceled and I do the whole labor thing.
          If she’s got a “birth plan” then do what you can to pack things that will honor it if possible – some women want specific music or candles. Births do not always go as planned, though, so don’t feel bad if something changes.

    • Don’t forget snacks!

    • -Pajamas; always thin overnight pads (because the pads they give you after birth are like mini hospital beds; cell phone charger; toothpaste/brush and other small toiletries; chap stick (lips get chapped with all that quick breathing); sugar candies (keep your mouth moist); hair rubber bands. I also packed a second bag in case I ended up with a c-section….and I ended up with an emergency one so my husband went back for the second bag. Planned for 2 day stay, was there almost a week. Don’t forget the cell phone charger!! For you – granola bars and whatever else (but our hospital had a open fridge for patient and support person). I’d guess hospitals would have lanolin samples but you can get a tube of it at Target or anywhere else – i found it to stain, so I stuck with the earth mama stuff which didn’t. good luck!

      • SFT

        Sounds like we had identical experiences – I was there for 6 days! I recommend some dry/waterless shampoo in case showering is just too much for her. And lots of snacks, especially for middle of the night feedings/pumping sessions. The cafeteria closes and you don’t want a hungry mama on your hands 🙂 I most appreciated having my own pillows, robe, and loose clothes – I had an unexpected c-section so really needed to stay loose on the mid-section. I know that people want to send flowers and trinkets to the hospital, but they are so hard to manage, recommend telling folks to hold off and send things to the house after you all get home! Good luck – you sound like a great friend 🙂

      • I forgot to add…..BRING COLACE. It took GW like 48 hours to bring me anything. And she will need it regardless of the type of delivery. Dulcolax, colace, whatever.

  • Long extended rant: My boss kind of sucks and is really controlling. She really doesn’t let me do my job and micromanages and changes everything all the time. Then she gets frustrated when I don’t take initiative. Well, I can’t take initiative because she doesn’t empower me to do so and when I do take initiative she gets angry that I”m not doing something her way or the way it’s “always” been done. I took this job because the organization said they wanted somebody different and innovator, but she isn’t letting me do that. Just because she does things a certain way, doesn’t mean it’s the best way or that it even matters. Also, I never got any training and she doesn’t help at all and never responds every time I ask for help, and then she gets so mad when something isn’t done “her way” or “the way it’s always been done”. I don’t know what that is unless you tell me! I try so hard to communicate with her, but at some point she has to trust me to do this job.

    • Ugh, that is so frustrating. Can you talk to HR about it? They may be able to run interference between you two or help find you another assignment since this one isn’t working out.

    • I swear, this could have been the same exact thing I posted for my last position. Same thing – was brought in to bring in fresh ideas and new blood, all of which was quickly quashed. I was given new tasks with zero training, and basically wasn’t trained at all on my key tasks. They ended up eliminating my position after 6 months and elevating the person who had previously been in my position to a management type role but she would be doing the same stuff as she was before. Essentially, I was a pawn used to give my predecessor a promotion and huge pay raise. I have such a distaste in my mouth for what happened that I will never work in that industry again.

    • Oh nooo — this actually sounds like my old job, down to the very last detail. I really hope you don’t have my old job because there’s a reason why I left. 🙁 Hope things get better!

  • Rave: I was confirmed yesterday at St. Peter’s Church on Capitol Hill. I thought the process might be tedious, but overall it really contributed to my spiritual journey as I made friends in the classes, became a part of the church community, and developed a relationship with my sponsor as well as church staff, all of whom are very warm and welcoming. I’m very glad I did it and now I’m able to be Godmother to my friend’s beautiful baby boy. Such a great experience and my heart is full of love from and for others today!

  • Rave: Really fun weekend! Work holiday party was amazing, as usual. There was a cross-dressing Elsa dancing along to Let It Go, more cross-dressing dancing to “Happy” (my boss was in that, although he wasn’t in drag but was in a crop top and he gloomily told me he had to shave his stomach for it), a guy running around in a sexy lion costume, amongst other things. Just good silly fun. Also friend holiday parties/potlucks. I ate so much food, I was in a permanent food coma the whole time.

  • epric002

    rant: the wapo let that idiot andy harris have a big ole column in the sunday paper about how marijuana is bad b/c it’s a schedule one drug; and it’s a schedule one drug b/c it’s so bad. the circular logic from this MEDICAL DOCTOR pinhead is making me batty! and it wasn’t enough that he took away DC’s voice and vote with his stupid language in the appropriations bill, but the post had to give him another platform with which to spew his meddlesome drivel!? LIVID.
    random: there will be a community meeting with MPD at the raymond recreation center at 7pm on thurs 18 december. this is in response to the robbery/sexual assault that occurred in the randolph st alley monday night, and other crime generally in our area.
    rave: san diego later this week!
    rave: holiday party on saturday went great!

  • skj84

    Rant: Really crappy start to the week. I missed my bus and was 15 minutes late. Then had dispute with a coworker over a lead. I already was in a bad mood, but the dispute just sent me over the edge. I’m ready to go home and sulk and it isn’t even 11am.

    Rave: a week till Christmas and I can see my family! I can’t wait to see my sister.

    • I SO hear you about going home and sulking. It’s all I want to do right now. Just had another crappy interaction with crappy boss (I’m above commenter) that was completely terrible. She wondered why I don’t have time to “strategically plan” for my department yet she dropped off a completely ridiculous review process she’s implementing for our press releases. Well duh lady, I can’t do any strategic planning because you’re giving me a process that includes 80 people to review one sheet of paper. Kinda takes a long time to track those changes/comments AND make sure you approve each time it comes back from reviewer. SIGH.

      • skj84

        ugh. Crappy bosses are the worse. I reached a resolution with coworker, but I’m stilled pissed. Someone loaded the same lead twice under a different name and we both have been pitching him. I’m mostly upset that a mistake this big was made and put us into a bad situation. Manager is going to give us both the close, but still shit like this shouldn’t happen. I think I’m going to take an early lunch and start over today.

        • Allison

          Yay for starting over! Back in law school I used to “start over” my days a lot. This means making coffee as though it were morning, and literally pretending everything after 2:00pm or so (that’s usually when it needed to happen) is a new day. It helped.

  • Rant: teachers who take away recess for no homework.
    Rant: teachers who tell me what to do/try to push me around
    Rave: field trip tomorrow
    Rave: winter break next week

  • justinbc

    Rant/Rave: Newsroom is over, didn’t realize last night was going to be the last episode. So many sads.
    Rant: Office higher ups making everyone do Christmas crap. I like this holiday even less than Halloween, can we please leave it at home people?

    • +1 on your second rant. I don’t care if its not a religious holiday for you – I still don’t want to celebrate it.

    • Emmaleigh504

      Yes please! The forced holiday joy is one reason I hate Christmas. It’s not my holiday, why do I have to celebrate with you?

  • Rant: I really hate the commercialization of Christmas in America. I married into a family that spends so much time and money buying STUFF, while all I want is less stuff and a more simple life. I asked people to please not bring us gifts unless we can consume them and I fear that I will be seen as the Grinch by my hubby’s family because it is tradition to exchange a million gifts that are 90 percent junk (my definition of junk is very broad).

    Rant: Sick all weekend but still had to go Xmas shopping for the family.

    Rave: Off to Thailand in one week. This holiday season has been more stressful than joyful, looking forward to some much needed R&R on our delayed honeymoon.

    • Forgot a rave, won the lottery for Cherry Blossom 10 miler! Excited to run it again, this time with my hubby!

    • I married into a similar family, after having simple and often homemade presents from my family my whole life. The strangest part was that my spouse’s family wanted (still wants) a list, which they treat as request/demands, not as suggestions. So we have to be careful, because some years, we have gotten everything on the list, PLUS other stuff.

      I try to remember that this is how they show love and affection; they’re honestly not trying to one-up or be materialistic. They are gift-givers, and it is very important to them that the gifts are wanted and liked. I tried asking for donations for a few years, but the only person who paid attention to that was my MIL, so it didn’t curb the gift influx. I’ve set firmer boundaries now that there are kids in the picture, and made suggestions like doing a draw name (which has stuck).

      There’s not much you can really do – You can accept (not embrace) the tradition or you can chafe against it. But don’t worry about how they see you; you can’t really change that. As long as you are gracious about your suggestion and about any gifts you do receive, then you’re not a Grinch!

      Enjoy the honeymoon!

    • I am proudly a Grinch. Others seem to think it’s an insult. The thing is, I donate my time / money to helping out worthwhile causes. Not hanging target / walmart crap.

    • I was born into the family you describe. I hate it, and every year one sibling and I try to ratchet it back and set spending caps, etc. And every year we follow the amounts everyone agreed to, everyone else way overspends, so then we’re saddled with crap as well as feeling bad for being the “cheap” ones. And they’re my own family so I can probably be more direct than you can about why it actually makes the whole holiday season unpleasant for me, but it falls on deaf ears.

  • Quotia Zelda

    Rave: Awesome weekend, even if it was busybusy.
    Rant: My Metro station was kinda stabby this morning.

  • Rave: I had a lovely time with my foster this weekend. She was such a sweetheart and bonded really quickly. Sadly, she didn’t get adopted yesterday and I can’t foster her long term.
    Rant: I was in a good mood this morning until I realized I had left my laptop at home. I was half way to work by then, so I ended up being about 50 minutes late. It put me in a pretty bad mood.

    • Hi Jeslett! What kind of pup are you fostering? Do you have a Petfinder link?

      • You can find her on Luck Dog, her name is Payton. She went to boarding last night though. I’m gone for long hours and I don’t have another dog, so I don’t have a dog walker. It was hard to let her go to boarding, but I didn’t think it was a good idea to take her on last minute without really being prepared.
        She’s such a sweetheart.

        • I should add that I overnight foster, Saturday into Sunday and take the dog to the Sunday event. From there they either get adopted, go to a long term foster, or boarding.

          • Good lord, Payton is adorable! I wish I had the space for another pup. 🙁 Thank you for fostering! 🙂

        • D’awww she is adorable! Those ears!! I’m looking to adopt a dog soon, but not until after the holidays. I wish I could adopt all the doggies!

  • Rave: Went to two fun events on Saturday with lots of great food and drink.
    Rave: Managed to get some container gardening done on Sunday — repotting plants, planting some bulbs, and evicting a plant.
    Rant: I think I’m following too much of a policy of appeasement with my cat. I need to employ more tough love.

    • binpetworth

      If you figure out a tough love strategy for your cat that works I want to hear it!

      • Her issues aren’t all that big, as far as cat behavioral issues go… but I realized recently that she had successfully manipulated me into feeding her wet food twice a day when I’m teleworking, rather than just once in the evening at the usual time. She isn’t overweight, and wet food is good for her, so it’s not that big of a deal… but I used to be much firmer about not letting her whine/annoy her way into an early dinner.

      • More of a problem is that when she wants my attention, she’ll jump up on the coffee table and start tearing at any paper in sight — receipts, envelopes, whatever. Even if I declutter the coffee table, I don’t think that will help all that much; for a while, she was going (to my horror) after the edges of library books that were stacked on the floor in the foyer.
        I think she has trained me a little too well into playing with her when she starts being disruptive. I probably need to play with her more (with prey-type dangle toys) as a preventive thing, and scoop her up and lock her in the bathroom when she’s being naughty.

      • I have probably also been a little too responsive when she meows at my bedroom door in the middle of the night. (She used to sleep on my bed, but then stopped, so now I try to keep the door closed so she doesn’t come in at 3:30 a.m. wanting to play.) An ASPCA thing I was reading last night pointed out that (duh) if you go to the door when your cat meows, then the cat learns that meowing is an effective way to get you to let it in.

    • Allison

      Lol to “evicting a plant” — I imagined you and the plant standing in L/T court and the plant is wearing a little suit. Adorbs.

      • LOL!
        Nah, D.C. tenants’ rights don’t apply to plants. Sorry, verbena canadensis; you’re OUT!

      • Where’s the *like* button for this?

        • …..and taking out plants you don’t like/aren’t thriving/etc is really satisfying (I call it “editing”)

          • Heh, I hadn’t thought of it in that way!
            I used to feel guilty about getting rid of any plants. In my old place I would take them straight to the trash chute so I didn’t have to look at them staring at me accusatorily from the kitchen trash can.
            But the prospect of getting my money back from Home Depot makes me feel less guilty, and life is just too short for plants that are unattractive, not thriving, etc. And I can use that container for some other plant!

  • I Dont Get It

    Rave: It’s Monday. Time to change those Dollar Shave Club razors, people!
    Rave: Sunday delivery from Amazon Prime!

  • Rant: Hungover.
    Rave: Because we had a really fun holiday party last night. It was worth the Monday morning pain!
    Rant: Work stress is starting to reach a breaking point, it feels like. I’m really considering walking away from my job. It’s a fantastic opportunity and it’s really hard to even consider this, but, my wonderful life is passing me by and I’m too stressed out to enjoy it.

  • Rant: Office potluck season means increased chances of having someone spill their six-bean-salad juice on you on metro.
    Rave: What a weekend. The Saturday protest was great, good atmosphere, very family friendly. It engendered lots of good questions/discussions with the kids. We’re glad we went.

  • RAVE: an amazing weekend full of art-making, art appreciating, and heady human awesomeness, *AND* I sold a brand new painting. The last time I created a painting in the same style, in late 2013, it sold within a week of its posting on social media, so I’ll take it as a sign. Good thing I have three more in the pipeline!

    RAVE: was listening to Emmylou Harris’ “Wrecking Ball” this weekend, and I’m even more awed by Daniel Lanois’ profoundly awesome aesthetic. I want to see how close I can approximate this sound with just a guitar, a midi-controller keyboard, and the tools available to me in Garageband.

    RANT: I guess I just wish there were 36 hours in a day, and we still only needed to sleep a max of 8 hours.

  • Accountering

    Rave: Closing on a condo in Bloomingdale/Ledroit Park/Truxton Circle today! Not really sure what exact neighborhood it is, as Google Maps conveniently has a hole in it. Place is at 2nd and Florida (north side) and is in a hole between those three neighborhoods.
    Rave2: We are next to that screwed up electronics store, that sounds like it is going away.

    • Sounds like us up 14th St. Not far enough south for Columbia Heights, not far enough east for Petworth/Park View, not far enough west for Crestwood, and not far enough north for 16th St Heights. I have chosen to dub our neighborhood 14th St. Heights. Neighborhoodless citizens unite!

    • Pablo Raw

      Just call it whatever you like better 🙂

      • Accountering

        I think, as we are renting on AirBNB, I am going to call it Shaw 🙂 It is only a .4 mile walk to the metro, so I don’t think that is completely unreasonable? I certainly will not pull the typical realtor jig and say it is “steps to metro” haha! To a tourist, Truxton Circle, Ledroit Park, and Bloomingdale basically mean nothing, but it is close to Shaw, so I may be adopting that!

        • I actually think of Bloomingdale having its own cache — you could always cite proximity to Red Hen, Big Bear, etc., as well as the Shaw metro — and it seems to be a closer geographic fit. That said, I have very little AirBNB experience in DC, so maybe Shaw -would- make more sense to people who don’t live here?

          • Bloomingdale has its own cachet among D.C. residents, but Shaw shares its name with a Metro station. So I think the name wins hands-down as more of a draw for tourists.

        • I think most people assume that neighborhoods radiate out from the metros that share the same name, so Shaw would probably be appropriate. Tourists are likely reassured to see the name of the metro in the neighborhood name.

        • For people who don’t live in/know DC, the only neighborhoods they’re likely to recognize are Georgetown, Woodley and Cleveland Parks, Dupont Circle, or the Mall. Calling it Shaw is better than Bloomingdale if only because they can find it on a Metro map. If you were advertising it as a long-term rental, I agree that Bloomingdale might be appealing to many, but for AirBNBers go with something they can find on the Metro map.

        • As long as you put .4 miles to Metro (And it is in fact .4 miles to Metro) instead of the most annoying “walking distance” you’ll be fine. Airbnb clientele is a bit different from VRBO/HA, they tend to be more aware of neighborhoods. Good luck. Would love to see your listing and know how it goes. With 35 “entire place” in Shaw under $150.00 a night, 22 under $120.00 you have some competition.

          And removing neighborhood filters – you have over 1000 listings under $130/night.

      • While you can surely call this whatever you please, 2nd street is the western boundary of Bloomingdale. I’d argue that all houses on 2nd fall into Bloomingdale (so yours included). Step up that hipster boho cachet game.

    • Congrats! Does this mean that you’ve been in the process of closing on two places at the same time? Or is this the same place that you and Andie called Shaw before?

      • I think the house in Shaw is for him and Andie to live in once it’s done… so I’m assuming this Bloomingdale/Ledroit Park/Truxton Circle condo is for renting out on Airbnb. (But maybe not?)
        Accountering, is this the same place you mentioned before — a basement with a separate entrance, in a converted rowhouse?

        • Accountering

          Hehe, good questions! The shaw rowhouse closing got delayed until later this month. This is the separate entrance basement in a 10 unit building in the aformentioned hole in the middle of those three neighborhoods to rent on AirBNB 🙂

          • I’m impressed with your fortitude, Accountering! I thought the process for closing on a single property was daunting enough as-is! Although I guess that two closings is essentially the same process twice (?). Good luck with both closings!

          • I think I know just which unit you’re talking about. Good luck at the closing, though it seems like that won’t be an issue. 😉

          • houseintherear

            Is this in the remodeled building on the NW corner there at 2nd and Florida? The only one left was that TINY studio… good price… is that the one? When I walked through at an open house, I had trouble thinking of how to even fit a bed in there, let along a TV or table or anything else. Guess that makes it a perfect apartment for short term rentals and not long term living.

          • houseintherear

            Also- technically it’s Ledroit Park (not that it matters). 2nd St is the border between Bloomingdale and Ledroit (east and west sides, respectively) and Florida is the border between Shaw and the others (south and north, respectively).

          • Accountering

            Thats the one. First, it is a 1BR! It has a separate room for the bedroom, so I am sticking with 1BR! 🙂
            It is very small, but I think it works very well for short-term rentals. I can’t imagine living there long-term, but I think for a business person or small family (three?) coming in to see the mall and such, it is WAY better (and cheaper) than any of the hotels in the area.
            Thanks for clarification on the neighborhood. It is definitely right on the border! Fun part was figuring out what Ward we are in. I was shocked to see it is W5.

          • houseintherear

            Ahh that’s right- good that there’s a separate bedroom. Congrats on the closing(s).

    • How many friggin properties will you own?
      I’m still working on getting my first, jeez.

      • Save, save, save! Consider all the first time programs out there. If you’re willing to put in the work, it won’t be such a daunting task.

    • laduvet

      It’s the FRINJ or “Fringe” neighborhood! I think pop had an article about this area last year?

    • ahh, so not the former funeral home?

  • RANT #2: while I’ll admit to a beloved hatred of the music of Creed, I was deeply saddened this morning to hear some “morning zoo” radio program playing recordings of Scott “the voice of Creed” Stapp’s rantings and ravings. The guy is obviously a drug addict dealing with some sort of paranoid psychosis, and having a really hard time with life at the moment. Why are people mocking him? I feel like our society is deeply lacking in empathy.

    • skj84

      Agreed. Mental illness isn’t funny. I feel the same way about the coverage on Amanda Bynes.

      • +100000000 And Amy Winehouse. And Britney Spears. And Lindsay Lohan. And Robert Downey Jr. back in the day. And everyone on “Intervention” and “Hoarders.” At some point, you would hope that people’s humanity would kick in and they would see that this person is suffering and the pile-ons aren’t helping. But they never seem to reach that point, because there is always money to be made by ignoring it. It’s so cruel and so uncomfortable to see.

  • Blithe

    Rave: Hanging out with Pablo Raw — a most charming tour guide — at NMAI. Way fun! The setting was awesome, and the conversation was awesome-er.
    Rave: I made a yummy frittata — and might actually invest in some cast iron cookware so I can do this again. Gulp.
    Rant-ish: Unsettling dream about carnivorous plants and “people” that I suspect migrated over from That Holiday Village.
    Rant-ish: Planning to go to an Apple store to see if the pictures on my old Krzr can be transferred to my iphone. Fingers crossed.

    • I Dont Get It

      Whoops! Sorry!

    • Blithe

      Query: One more Rant: %&$@ stickers stuck on tv. I’ve tried coconut oil, peanut butter, alcohol, a heated washcloth and goo gone, and they’re still stubbornly stuck. If anyone has other suggestions, I’d welcome them.

      • Heat gently with blow dryer?

      • I was going to recommend Goo Gone until I saw it on your list — that must be some tenacious adhesive!
        Not sure if you’ve already tried this, but I’ve noticed that Goo Gone seems to work best when it’s allowed to sit on/soak into the gooey thing for a little while.

        • I’ve used WD40 with the soaking tactic on the older DC vehicle registration stickers with much success. And a razor blade, but that doesn’t sounds like a good idea here. The only annoying thing is then getting the WD40 off.

      • Blithe

        Thanks for all of your suggestions! I got the only Goo Gone that I saw, and was surprised that it was a liquid — I was expecting something more like a gel. I’ll try leaving it on longer and see if that helps. — Jeslett, I thought of trying a razor blade, but between my fear of scratching the tv and my worry that any resulting blood might make things worse, I agree — NOT a good idea. I will try WD40 though — if I can’t get the Goo Gone to work. And if none of those things work, I’ll borrow a blow dryer.
        Thanks all!

  • Rant: Still recovering from the extreme stress of last week. Working 50 hours in three days is just a bit much.
    Rave: Had a couple days of vacation in southern CA after the craziness.
    Rant: Slept for about 3 hours last night and am really feeling it today.
    Rave: Put up our tree yesterday and I’m looking forward to coming home, lighting a candle, and reading next to the tree tonight. I’m on a YA fiction kick lately.

  • Question….Fellow Feds – if you almost have your 10 years in, would you stick it out, or keep intereviewing for/looking for a new job if you needed to find a new one?

    I’m very torn – I have an interview tomorrow, but I’m SO close to the 10 years (which currently gives me a little bit of my pension and also I can have merit promotions status if I leave the gov and want to return, I think?). Anyone have opinions on this….?

    Rant: I definitely feel like my duties haven’t been returned to me since having my child and they’re pushing me even more into a secretary role.

    • anonymouse_dianne

      I won’t keep working as a fed long enough to get 10 years (started in 2011). I am however looking for another fed position in a better locations, and hopefully the next grade up as I am stuck in step 10. Can you look for another fed position? My understanding is that your leave, etc. is transferable.

    • I’m not sure about the pension aspect because I don’t have anything to do with benefits…but as long as you are a permanent (not excepted) employee with career tenure (at least 3 years in the government) you have return rights and can apply under merit promotion. You can double check your SF50 to verify your permanent career status.

    • It’s my understanding that you’re career permanent after three years, which give you the merit eligibility should you return to the federal service at some point. Now, the pension vesting is a different beast. You’re considered vested at 5 years, but the longer you serve obviously the higher your payout. The math is typically 1% of your high-3 average pay times years of creditable service. This can change per agency, so it might be good to talk to HR, but since you’re over 5 years, you’re just adding to your years of creditable service and potentially increasing your high-3 pay.

    • Jindc – I recommend you check out the OPM website for some more information on what benefits occur at the 10-year mark. I wasn’t aware of any, but if sounds like I’m missing out on something. Also research the impact of any annual leave you may have counting towards your time. I’m not sure, but I think if you have AL built up you not only get a pay-out when you leave, but that counts towards your time in service? If so, it could help you get over the 10-year mark. Also, if you’re looking at the 10 years of service towards retirement, keep in mind that you can always return to gov’t later and add on to your time-in-service.

  • Rant: back at work
    Rave/rant: no substantive emails despite being gone for 2 weeks
    Rave: boss is out sick
    Rave: took about 2300 pictures on my vacation
    Rant: on cipro right now and paranoid about my achilles’ tendons.

  • palisades

    Rave: New Modest Mouse single!!!

  • I need the collective wisdom of Popvill before I start blasting the DC Office of real property, I can’t understand why my my house is valued less than my neighbors, yet I am assessed more tax than they are. Example one neighbor house is valued at $612K, yet they are assessed at $278K, my value is $487K my assessment is $377K. What am I missing? I have been living in my house longer than my neighbors by about three years.

    • Ally

      You do have the option of challenging the property tax assessment, if you opt to do so. Mine increased this year, but not by enough to justify challenging it. Also, for the actual home value, depends on if you’re looking at Zillow (notoriously inaccurate for home values), or comp sales in your area, or an actual home appraisal.

    • Ally

      This page has a little info that may or may not be helpful: http://otr.cfo.dc.gov/page/real-property-tax-rates

    • Appraised value has very little to do with a house’s assessed value for tax purposes.
      I think there’s a percentage cap on how much the assessment can go up from one year to the next, which might explain the disparity between your neighbor’s house and yours. Have you checked the tax records — was there actually a sale when your neighbors moved in?
      Make sure the Office of Tax and Revenue has you listed as qualifying for the homestead deduction — that will knock $62K (IIRC) off your assessed value.

      • epric002

        +1 we were in a similar situation as mojo and went through the appeals only to be denied. having your house value less than your neighbors’ does not mean that you’ll have a lower tax assessment, unfortunately.

    • Regardless of assessed value, the value for tax purposes is capped at (I think) 12% a year starting from when you purchase your property. So if you purchased more recently than your neighbors, the amount of assessed value you have to pay tax on will be higher. I can’t remember which year they started this, but everyone who owned at that point started at whatever the assessment was at that time and even though assessed values rose quickly, the amount they have to pay tax on only goes up 12% a year. Hope this makes sense.

  • Ally

    Rave: Celebrated my 1-year anniversary with the fiance, which involved copious amounts of very good Ethiopian food.
    Rave/Rant: New boss/CIO starts today. We’ll see how this goes.
    Rant: First prenatal visit on Wednesday and I’m a nervous wreck. Hoping all goes okay.

  • Rave: Thank you everyone who gave me Christmas suggestions Friday! My mom and I had a great weekend.
    Rave2: Getting my bed back tonight – really looking forward to being able to stretch out!
    Rant: Drunk, uncouth people at parties. This guy insulted my home state, my high school (in that it was public), and my life choices all in the first 5 minutes. My boyfriend and I couldn’t find a way to extract ourselves, so we ended up listening to his “I’m not racist, but…” comments about a certain ethnicity of immigrants, how wonderful this guy is, etc.
    Rave3: Boyfriend and I have now devised a signal, and I will be using it often to get out of such situations. Glad I found a guy who isn’t racist, hates public schools, and is generally open-minded about other people’s lives!
    Question: I was looking for ready-made heat and serve apps at Giant this weekend for a holiday party and couldn’t find any – anyone have a suggestion for a metro-accessible place I could buy them? Or am I stuck doing the homemade thing?

    • Trader Joe’s has a great assortment. The chicken spring rolls and vegetable “nests” (tempura) are my favorites. Whole Foods and Costco have some nice options as well.

  • Allison

    Rave: I love my boss(es). People on PoPville complain about their management a lot and it’s reinforced how lucky I am. For example, I committed an error of indiscretion late Friday afternoon that bothered me all weekend, but after I ‘fessed up this morning to my boss she thanked me for letting her know promptly, and immediately went and smoothed things over. Not even mad at me for passing the buck. LOVE HER.

  • Aglets

    Rave: GRUMP is over and I can rest. Really happy with how the show turned out and all of the folks who showed up
    Rant: I miss my NOMA harris teeter

  • Rave: My weekend was a near-perfect mix of productivity, fun, and relaxation.
    Question: I’d like to give both the day and evening concierge at my apartment building a xmas gift/holiday bonus type thing. Any suggestions on an appropriate gift, and amount? Is cash tacky?

    • Emmaleigh504

      Cash is always appropriate in this situation!

    • I give $40+, depending on how the year has been for me (grad student…), and I also try to go in on the building-organized gift if there is an ask.

    • To piggyback, I’d like to give our dog walker a small tip for the holidays. She’s only been walking our dog for about two months. Any thoughts on an appropriate amount? What do other people tip their dog walkers? She comes once a day, Monday through Friday.

      • We usually tip about one week’s worth, but that’s for the whole year. If she’s only been walking your dog for two months, maybe $25 and a small gift? We get ours a little sampler pack of nice lotion/lip balm from sephora since she’s outdoors all winter and I’m sure it’s murder on your skin.

        • epric002

          i’ve also heard 1-week’s worth. we’re going to do 2 weeks, but that’s b/c our dog walker is super fabulous and helped us through/put up with our rotation of high-maintenance fosters and their related house training/medical/behavioral issues. if it had been a normal, uneventful year we’d probably go closer to the 1-week amount.

  • Rave: Nice first date on Sunday. Not sure if it’ll go anywhere but…
    Question: Any thoughts on who should text/email after a first date? If he pays, I text a thank you message and see what happens, but I’ve also been told I need to let guys initiate follow up more than I do. (I know that sounds old fashioned, but I think there’s something to it.) Since we went Dutch on Sunday, I haven’t texted, but neither has he. Let it go? Be the first to text? Wait for him to text?

    • Emmaleigh504

      text first, if he is turned off by that, do you want to date him?

    • epric002

      if you want to see him again, text him and tell him you had a good time and would like to see him again (or whatever your version is)

    • I found that treating a new date just like I would treat a friend or acquaintance worked well (but not like a really close friend, where you can really dispense with a lot of the politeness!!). If you wanted to let a friend know know you had a good time and wanted to go out again, would you be playing this mind game with yourself? No, you’d just send a quick but nice message.

    • Thanks for weighing in. I think the issue for me is that it makes it hard for me to gauge a guy’s interest if I’m always the one to text first, plan dates, etc. I’m not worried it’ll turn a guy off so much give him the opportunity to coast along in a relationship he’s not that interested in.

      • This is my feeling as well. I always tend to send the follow-up “thanks text” but find that this leads to a second date but not much more than that. So, my (however illogical) conclusion is that he never liked me that much in the first place and I prolonged the inevitable by asking for another date.

      • You could text first, but leave it up to him to plan a date. If he doesn’t follow up, he’s probably not that interested. Sunday, you mean yesterday? It’s likely been less than 24hrs since the date, so why are you stressing about who is texting at this stage?

        • Nope, not stressed at all. Really just wondering since it’s an ongoing question for me. And we had breakfast together so 24+ hours.

      • Sure, but it was one date and it was yesterday. You need at least several dates to feel out whether anyone is “coasting” or whatever. Until then do whatever you’re comfortable with – I don’t think there’s a right or wrong thing to do at this stage.
        But I will say that if you’re always the one to text first and plan dates then the guy is showing his (lack of) interest fairly clearly. What is hard about that?

        • Just to clarify, not the initiator of all texts, just the first and guys will ask me out for additional dates but I usually supply the ideas and hammer out details. Still, your point is worth giving some thought to.

          • Emmaleigh504

            are you a planner? Maybe that’s why you supply ideas and hammer out the details. I’m not much a planner, but a coaster, so maybe it’s just a different personality, that is complimentary. Though, even as a coaster, I initiate, I’m just happy to give up the planning of dates/hammering out details to a planner 🙂

    • I think it’s ok – even if it’s less than 24 hours after the initial date – to text and say: “Hey I had a good time, thanks for taking me out. Let’s go out again sometime soon! Have a good week.”
      You don’t need to immediately make plans for the second date, but everyone appreciates a bit of feedback and sincere interest. If he’s turned off and thinks you’re being too forward, then you really don’t want to be with someone like that. If he doesn’t respond, then he’s just not into you. But if the feeling is mutual, he’ll be confident about proposing a 2nd date. Regardless of his response, you come out ahead (he either quickly shows his jerky true colors OR he confirms his interest).
      Don’t over-think this.

  • KSB

    Rant: Been moderately sick most of the fall/winter. I know the little kid germs are mutant, but this is getting crazy.
    Rant: So deliriously tired, I’m edgy and snappy and not the person I like to be.
    Rave: People who simply say “I’m sorry. It’s tough right now and I hope it gets better soon” when you confide in them., as opposed to the people who say “Oh, I know EXACTLY how you feel. This happens to me ALL the time and I always feel like crap and you just can’t compete with how awful I have it…” Paraphrasing a little, but that’s the jist. Please just be empathetic/sympathetic when someone is in a tough spot. That’s not an area to one-up someone.

    • KSB, sorry you are feeling sick and tired. Perhaps a mental health day off (as I like to call them) would help. Sleep in, go on a long walk, take a nap, eat a hearty dinner, go to bed early… that actually sounds so good right now!

      • KSB

        Thank you – that would be exactly what’s needed. I’ve planned to work from home tomorrow, which is the best I can get right now. Definitely planning to go to bed early tonight too! My husband is amazing and does a great job helping me identify what I need to heal (both my physical and emotional states!) He’s definitely another “Rave” right now.

        • That is wonderful that you have a supportive hubby. I do too and it really makes life so much better all-around! Hope you get some rest and feel better soon : ) Cheers!

  • Rave: not at work – enjoying pre-Christmas mini break
    Rave: great dinner Saturday – even better company
    Rave: lots of fun with boyfriend – laughing and getting closer, feel amazingly lucky
    Rant: have to come home tomorrow night

  • palisades

    Went to the coffee shop in the national cathedral. I know very little about coffee but thoroughly enjoyed it. Also got a waffle, which was, by the way, $8. For one waffle. Way overpriced, but it was still tasty.

  • Rave: Got my Christmas bonus today! Ready to shop now.
    Rant: Not as much as last year but I’m still a happy camper.
    Rave: Sunny day in DC
    Rant: Having to look out the window and not being able to be outside!

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