Random Reader Rant and/or Revel

Photo of T Street, NW by PoPville reader LV

You can talk about whatever is on your mind โ€“ quality of life issues, a beautiful tree you spotted, scuttlebutt, or any random questions/thoughts you may have. But please no personal attacks and no need to correct peopleโ€™s grammar. This is a place to vent and/or celebrate things about daily life in DC.

276 Comment

  • Becks

    Rave: 1st Comment!!!
    Rave: I have time to browse Popville today!
    Rave: Lady Carlotta is so cute nestled on top of the heater. She has been extra snuggly since the cold weather started.
    Rave: I am going to make a feral cat shelter for the kitty outside this weekend.
    Rant: I has cold. Sniffling, sneezing, eye watering, coughing, cold!

  • Rave: It’s friday, have a friends birthday celebration tonight so it will be an amazing night. Have two days to myself and maybe a date on sunday.
    Rant: Nothing to really rant about which is nice.

  • Rave: Sold my tickets to the New Pornographers’ Saturday show.
    Hoping it’ll be a rave: Looking for a ticket to Friday’s show. Don’t suppose anyone in Popville has one they’d like to sell?
    Rave: Serial. Been awhile since I’ve had a show that has me on the edge of my seat like this. December 4th can’t come soon enough.

    • I’ve been enjoying the Slate Spoiler Special podcasts, which are breakdowns of each episode of Serial. It fills the time, especially because they’re going to release another one this coming Wednesday that will explore discussions of Serial that are happening elsewhere, like Reddit.

      • special_k

        I’ve been listening to those. Thanks for reminding me!

      • +1. I don’t always agree with the Slate podcasters’ analysis, but it is a useful way to think about the episodes afterwards. i look forward to the Spoiler Specials almost as much as I look forward to the episodes themselves.

      • To tell you the truth I haven’t listened to slate’s podcast. I was ready to listen to it after episode 7 but then I read the comments on the slate podcast. Listeners felt the hosts were really dismissive of Deirdre Enright and the Innocence Project, claiming episode 7 was a disappointing filler episode. After I saw that I was super turned off and didn’t want to listen to their podcast because I thought that episode was SUPER important and also fascinating. What do you like about it and should I give it a second chance?

        Tbh I am about done with theorizing and just look forward to any outcomes, especially after seeing this yesterday: http://www.law.virginia.edu/html/news/2014_fall/serial-enright.htm

        • GREAT link — thanks! I thought that single episode was the worst spoiler special for the exact reason that you mentioned. The podcasters absolutely downplayed the Innocence Project’s involvement, in my opinion. I wouldn’t recommend going back and listening to old episodes of the Spoiler Special since it sounds like you’re already well caught up and then some, but I do think it’s a useful way to help process my thoughts about the new episodes right after they come out. I agree with somethings they say and disagree with others, but going through that thought process helps me think things though more than I would on my own.

        • I wonder who they might be? —> “‘We’ve got these alternate suspects โ€” very legitimate alternate suspects,’ Enright said.”

          • (Not really)

          • No idea, but I can’t wait to find out. I don’t think SK or Serial would have introduced the Innocence Project in ep 7 unless they already had come up with something good, you know? Deirdre’s team started looking into the case in MARCH!

          • I think it was before March, actually — it looks like the three pro-bono students were added in March. If I properly understand my Maryland Court’s case search, a new appeal was filed in the case in January, presumably by an Innocence Project lawyer (Deirdre’s brother-in-law?).

          • Also, with each new episode, I become more convinced that Jay was the murderer and that he had an accomplice, likely Jenn. Jay was the only who knew where Hae’s car was and there needed someone else to drive either Hae’s or Adnan’s car that afternoon.

          • I also recommend reading Rabia Chaudry’s blog if you haven’t been doing so:


          • Awesome link, thanks for sharing! I wonder what the evidence it, I bet it’s DNA. But from what? Something on Hae? It had to be something they collected at the time, that rules out all of the stuff they talked about discounting from the crime scene, like the bottles. I’m sure Jay also wouldn’t want to talk if someone had recently swabbed his cheek to make a comparison /wishful thinking.

        • special_k

          I hated their discussion of episode 7. I have found their other discussions better. Not necessarily revelatory, but nice to hear people puzzling over the episodes and trying to make sense of them the way I am.

          • I agree. I did not like their take on ep 7, but listening to them discuss it gets my brain working and reminds me of details I may have forgotten or overlooked.

    • I’ve been mildly enjoying Serial and following along, looking forward to the next episode.
      However, as a major Charles Dickens fan, I lament the loss of the good serialized novel and would love to see it come back (maybe the popularity of Serial will help?)! Seriously would love to have been a part of Dicken’s era if only to enjoy sitting as a family sharing the reading of the next chapter of Bleakhouse or Great Expectations.

      • I remember hearing about this incident from a college professor:
        “Like most of [Dickens’] works, The Old Curiosity Shop (1841) was published in serial form. The novel won a vast readership on both sides of the Atlantic, and, as interest in the fate of the heroine, Little Nell, grew intense, circulation reached the staggering figure of 100,000.
        In New York, 6,000 people crowded the wharf where the ship carrying the final Master Humphreyโ€™s Clock magazine installment was due to dock. As it approached, the crowdโ€™s impatience grew to such a pitch that they surged forward and cried out as one to the sailors, ‘Does Little Nell die?’ “

      • I think that Maupin’s Tales of the City was originally written as a newspaper serial. I’ve been toying with the idea of doing a blog as a way of nudging myself to organize my novel-in-progress.

    • special_k

      Rave: Found a ticket to tonight’s show. Yay!

  • Mild Rave: Went to the new Giant Store near the National Cathedral last night (is that Cleveland Park or Cathedral Hts?). Not bad and certainly a vast improvement on what was there before.

    • If only there were a metro station called Cathedral Heights. Then I think you may have your answer.

    • Cleveland Park ends at Wisconsin. So, I think it’s Cathedral Heights.

      I agree the Giant is a vast improvement. It’s also a little underwhelming after shopping at social Safeway for a few years while it was being constructed.

    • Interesting question on the neighborhood. CP ends at Wisconsin… and Giant is on opposite side.

      McLean Gardens or Cathedral Heights would be my guess.

      • My friend lives in McClean Gardens and says she’s in Cleveland Park. I think Cathedral Heights is more south, like below Macomb and along Mass Ave.

  • I Dont Get It

    Rant: Senior Citizen dogs! The last two nights Lucy has gotten up to use the wee pads in the hallway and then stood there and barked outside the bedroom door for several minutes before running, aspirationally, back into the room. This morning I realized what the problem is, the upright vacuum cleaner had been parked, optimistically, outside my bedroom door. God only knows what in that wee lady dog head she thought it was in the dark!
    Rave: Looking at options for personalized stuff for baby and toddler nephews on Etsy and other places for Christmas. Good stuff!
    Rant: My dedication to fitness and bro code monitoring has totally waned and I really donโ€™t want to be one of those persons who show up back to the gym in January.

    • houseintherear

      ha, I love dog/vacuum stories. My dog is terrified, but my parents’ dog basically needs to have her tail vacuumed up before she’ll move out of the way.
      I had a cat a few years ago who was older than dirt and basically slept 24/7. One time I left the vacuum out in the living room after I’d finished cleaning. I watched him sneak down the stairs, tip toe across the room to the vacuum, raise his paw soooo slowly, then smack the vacuum once and take off running back upstairs. I guess he won..?

      • Actual LOL — great story!

      • I Dont Get It

        I used to dog sit a fox terrier (who’s blind and partially deaf now) who would attack the vaccuum cleaner when you turned it on. It was hilarious! She also hated ironing boards!

        • epric002

          nutty puppy fights the vacuum every time i run it. he’s not hurting himself or it, so usually i just let him amuse himself by attacking it. he also hates when i iron, but i think he hates the iron, not the board, b/c it makes funny steam/hissing noises. grouchy corgi can’t usually be bothered by the vacuum unless i bump it into the bed that she’s on, in which case she’ll just move to a different spot.

      • My old deaf dog was sitting on the rug once while I was running my Roomba. Roomba is supposed to turn the other way when it hits solid objects. Roomba butts up against dog, and turns the other way. Dog can’t be bothered to move, so he just sits there until he realizes that Roomba has vacuumed up some of his tail and is trying to drag him away. I’m watching this happen and laughing until I realize that my poor dog is actually trapped inside my vacuum cleaner.

        • My ex’s uncle had a Roomba and usually just left it on when he went out to run errands or something. His dog had a #2 accident in the house and the Roomba spread it ALL over the living room carpet….

      • lol. My dog is conflicted, both terrified and curious of the vaccum.

      • +1

        My cat does that too, with my robo-vacuum that is stored in the open so it can run on its own. So adorable and hilarious to watch him run up and bat at it and then take off like he’s terrified of a monster’s retaliation!

    • If after you move the vacuum, he still starts to bark randomly at night, it might be worth a trip to the vet. That was one of the first signs of dementia in my elderly dog. It was really hard for him to sleep, and he’d wake up in the middle of the night discombobulated. It has been a few years, but there was some kind of medication that really helped with both that and the middle of the night urination.

  • Rave: PoPville T-shirt soon to join my wardrobe!
    Rave: Thanksgiving! Looking forward to making LOTS of leftovers.
    Rave/Rant: Last day of work for a week… My head is so not here.

  • Rave: Catching up on all of the tv shows I dvr. Sons of Anarchy was actually really good this week (although that car chase scene should have had narration by Waylon Jennings.) I hope they can keep it up for the last two episodes.

    Rant: American Horror Story – they killed my favorite character! You bastards!

    • I share your hopes for Sons (and your comments about the car chase scene – WTF?), but I have a feeling it’s going to be disappointing.

  • Rave: Having worked at the restaurant where I’m going to dinner on Sunday gives me the ability to specify exactly what table I want in my reservation
    Rave: Impromptu trip to Philly for Turkey Day brunch
    Revel: Old boss inviting me to his home/having an old boss I want to drive 2 hrs to see
    Revel: The ability to mostly work from home from next week until year’s end. So. Much. Gym time.

    • That’s cool that you can go there and enjoy it. It’s been a long time since I was a server, but I don’t know that I could have been comfortable as a customer at the place I worked, even leaving on good terms.

      • The high turnover means I don’t know a lot of people anymore. My ladyfriend really likes the place, so I figured why not especially when they’re doing the 50% off food on Sunday. That is the only way I’d consider going there unless it’s for a quick brunch at the bar.

  • Rant: Brothers who don’t respond to emails/texts! Every Xmas we go in on nicer gifts for our parents, and every year I start sending emails about it in November that all go unanswered. And every year, without fail, a week and a half before Christmas, I get emails from them saying “So what are we getting Mom and Dad?”
    Rave: Started Christmas shopping without them.
    Rave: Excited for a potluck Friendsgiving this Thursday. I’m in charge of apps — baked brie and deviled eggs. Trying to decide if I need a third.

    • I would just make the purchases and send your brothers an invoice. ๐Ÿ™‚

      • Yes, and just like the person who took a discount on rent for organizing the house, I think you should not split the cost equally.

        • Ha! Sure, why not ratchet up the potential level of aggravation and resentment?

          • Sure, someone in the situation may feel resentful and aggravated, but this way it won’t be SKTacos.

          • Anonymous 11:24 am has a point. ๐Ÿ˜‰
            I don’t see any problem with SparklyKittyTacos cutting herself some kind of nominal “administrative fee,” so that she pays $10-20 less than what each brother is paying (depending on how expensive the gift is).

          • They make a lot more than I do and usually offer to pay a bit more anyway, so that’s not an issue. But they also usually have the best gift ideas! Which is why I like their input before I buy anything. :/

    • When I used to be the family gift coordinator this would happen. I’d just pick something and email my family and tell them that I think mom would like X, which will cost each of us Y and if they disagree tell me by a date certain. I’d follow up with a phone call. If they didn’t object, I’d just go ahead. They always paid because they were so happy to have it taken care of.

      That said, I got sick of doing it, so now I just do gifts for myself and let them fend for themselves, even if mom gets a smaller gift that way.

    • I Dont Get It

      Are you my sister?

      • Well, all I’m saying is you should have a chat with mom. Or, the mailman, whomever you see first.

      • lol on behalf of gift coordinators everywhere, respond to your sister’s emails!!!

        • I Dont Get It

          The problem is solved this year since I announced that I am not giving Christmas presents to adults.

          • I did this one year (just couldn’t add it on one year, I was working two jobs during a transition, moving cross country, etc.), I declared a moratorium on giving AND receiving presents. Best Christmas Ever.
            My holiday stress levels have ratcheted up just reading this thread, I find both the giving and receiving really stressful and just wish we could treat Christmas like Thanksgiving – spend the day together and eat too much food, etc.

          • Emmaleigh504

            Anonymous, that is a Christmas I could get behind!

          • I Dont Get It

            Yes I’ve also said I don’t expect to receive any. So far its been a lot of fun finding stuff for the kids and not worryng about adults.

    • In my family we don’t team up on gifts or buy gifts for everybody. We adults (siblings, spouses, parents) do a secret santa exchange. Everybody buys one gift, there’s no teaming up or coordinating necessary. None of us love shopping and none of us need a whole bunch of gifts; and it removes a huge potential source of aggravation so we can actually just enjoy hanging out with each other during the holidays. I say get rid of the things that bring aggravation.

      • I think I’m the only one who’s aggravated (my brothers don’t respond to my parents either so I get emails from them asking “what do your brothers want?” and “what do your brothers’ girlfriends want?”) but I’m going to bring this up for next year!

        • Yeah, that’s what I mean! Your brothers sound like they’re not really bothered about it so why force something that’s not happening? After a few futile years of half of us going round asking “what does X want for Christmas?” we said, hey, we’re adults and already have the ability to procure the things we want. It sounds cheesy but the best gift we can give each other is time spent together (and less time spent shopping.)

    • A few years ago we started doing a family white elephant exchange. We put a dollar limit ($75 I think) and everyone buys something, then we do the numbers and exchanging. It’s fun but challenging because we range in age from 21-68 (lil kids not included). The women in my family draw names for stocking gifts and the men get a cigar and porn (somewhat misogynist tradition that dates back to my grandfather).

    • Sounds like my siblings. They don’t have an appreciation for things like, oh I don’t know, planning and organization.

  • pablo .raw

    Rave: Unofficial PoPville Thanksgiving dinner at noon ๐Ÿ˜› at Black Squirrell; meeting time 11:30
    Rave: Was the photographer for a wonderful wedding yesterday, weather was great and the fall colors are still there; both things were kind of unexpected.

  • Quotia Zelda

    Rant: This week, it has taken 14 years for Friday to arrive, and I fear that today will last almost as long.
    Rave: The guys playing guitar and violin together at L’Enfant Plaza this morning. They were playing a really beautiful piece.
    Rave: This may be an indication that I am basic, but the annual arrival of red cups at Starbucks makes me happy.

  • Rave: Columbia Room with a great crew tonight.
    Rave: Toastmasters is paying off. I’m speaking to the whole company Monday (or at least the people who will be there during the holiday week) and I feel much more confident in my preparations and ability to deliver. Also, I got to talk to the Australian guy about his work so I can mention it. It’s really cool work and he has an awesome accent.
    Rant: Sinus infections can cause nausea. That’s news to me. Not good news.
    Rant: I feel like my life is a perpetual battle to keep my kitchen clean.

  • Public Service Announcement (in case you missed it in yesterday’s RRRR) for anyone with no Thanksgiving plans*:
    There will be an unofficial PoPville Thanksgiving Get-Together on Thanksgiving Day (Thurs. 11/27) at the Black Squirrel. We’ll be meeting in front at 11:30 a.m.
    * Or for ambitious people who want to go to multiple Thanksgiving gatherings on the same day. ๐Ÿ˜‰

  • Emmaleigh504

    Rant: Work won’t be slowing down for the winter holiday season b/c we are so short staffed. It’s going to really suck when things ramp back up to normal levels after New Years.
    Rave: Movie Friday Question of the Day discussion.
    Rant: Haven’t seen the super happy pit bull in a while.
    Rave: all the people in my neighborhood that I’ve seen recently who are teaching their dogs good leash manners.

    • I Dont Get It

      Super happy pit bull?

      • Emmaleigh504

        There’s adorable pit bull that looks likes she’s smiling when her human walks her. As she passes people she looks at them as if to say hi. Everyone ends up laughing and smiling as she goes by. It’s the best!

        • Oh, there’s a golden retriever in my neighborhood like that. Big smile on her face, she makes eye contact with each person she passes. If you smile back at her, she wags her tail so hard her whole backend wiggles.

          • If you haven’t seen this – google golden retriever fails obedience test. It’s hilarious (and in my opinion, the golden is really the smartest dog of the bunc!)

          • hahahaha that’s hilarious, but I sort of feel badly for its human, such public humiliation.

          • That was on my facebook feed a day or two ago… meant to watch it at the time, but will definitely do it on your recommendation!

  • Rave- Major project 18 months in them making getting released today. Still not totally finsihed but I will at least have a pleasant holiday season..
    rave 2-Christmas music started on the radio on 97.1
    Rave/rant-stopped by Mason Dixie at Union Market this mornign to get get biscuits for colleagues who have really been busting their ass this week to help with project (rave 1). They don’t do the fried chicken though the Union market location though??!! thats the best one. I thought the quality was really down compared to the pop up in Park View. It looks like they premake the biscuits in another kitchen and then heat them up in a toaster oven while you wait. Totally not the same as fresh out of the oven. They said business is good though but for the folks who never got them fresh at Eats Place you really do not know what you are missing out on. I hope they find a location with a full kitchen soon. Gotta get that fried chicken biscuit asap. But biscuit was still pretty good.

  • Rave: Half day today. This has been a very long week, so I am very ready for the weekend to begin.
    Rave/Rant: I slept really well last night, but didn’t get up in time to make it to the gym.
    Rave: Friendsgiving this weekend! I am so excited to go home, put on some music, open some wine, and start the 24 hour marathon of cooking. Thanksgiving is the best holiday. I love doing it twice.

    • Oh forgot a question for the Popvilleans: does anyone have a good recommendation for where to get a reasonably priced and delicious steak in this town? I’m having a craving.

      • I’ve always thought the steaks at District Chophouse are good and reasonably priced. Haven’t been there in a while though.

      • Ray’s the Steaks is awesome, and very reasonably priced for the quality. They are my favorite place to go when I want a steak that won’t break the bank.

      • If you’re willing to go outside the city, Outback has probably the cheapest/best quality prime rib. I had a really delicious french dip at Annie’s on 17th, so I imagine their steaks are pretty great; although, the prices are a bit high.

        • I’m a big fan of Annie’s. Not an amazing steak, but very good for what I think are very reasonable prices. I also love the neighborhood feel and great service. I occasionally enjoy the high-end steak “experience” for incredible steak, but have a low tolerance for pretensions service and upsells on everything.

      • Not reasonably priced at all, but Bourbon Steak is my current favorite steak in the city. If you want a really good, reasonably-priced steak (I’m not a big Ray’s ran), I think your best bet is Costco + cast iron skillet. (If you google cast iron skillet steak, a bunch of links for the cooking method come up). You’ll still come out ahead even if you have to buy the skillet.

    • Allison

      I once had a really great steak at “Mon Ami Gabi,” a very reasonably priced French bistro, near the Bethesda metro station.

  • Andie302

    Rave: I thought of the BEST gift for my mom for Christmas (which is great, because I got her name in the adult exchange). I hope I can make it happen!
    Rave: It’s a potbellied pig. We had one growing up, and she’s mentioned getting another one several times over the last few years.
    Rave: I found a litter for sale thats local to her.
    Rant: Now I’m just waiting for a call back to see if they have any left. I really hope so!
    Rave: We’re no closer to deciding on which contractor to use, but it’s clear that we’re both open communicators and it makes me so happy. I feel like we’re dealing with the selection as adults, and we’re both willing to compromise. Now to see if we can get one guy to commit to a schedule, the other to commit to a bit of price-matching…and decide.
    Rave: Live music tonight – love a good cover band ๐Ÿ™‚ Happy Friday all!

  • Rant: Trying to get into Outlander (the book) and not really into it. Not sure if I should give it more time or just give up…it’s a library book so no harm no foul.

    Rave: Heading to Philly tomorrow to support family and friends – a charity dinner dance and then taking our friend’s 5 year old to cheer on his parents in the Philly marathon. Should be fun.

    Rave: Grandfather turning 95 and we’ll all be there to celebrate over Thanksgiving. He’s a rockstar.

    • Forgotten Rant: Nana would have been 90 this week…missing her and also very upset about my lost (then found, then lost) bracelet that was hers.
      Rave: My grandfather gave my husband her wedding band and engagement ring which I wear every day and love.

      • I’m sorry about your bracelet. I had my grandmother’s engagement diamond made into a necklace for my wife, and gave it to her for our wedding – I (and she) would be devastated if she lost it. We’ve had some scares, but have always found it. It, and a ring from her grandmother, are the two most sentimental pieces she has. I’d rather she lose her wedding and engagement rings than that. Hope it gets found.

        • Thank you. The frustrating part is that someone found it and turned it into Starbucks. They had it behind the counter, told me they had it, and now they don’t know where it is! It’d be easier if someone had walked away with you, I think…
          The necklace and ring sound beautiful – what a thoughtful loving gift!

          • Oh no! I’m so sorry to hear that. I hope they can find it quickly!

          • That sucks, since someone who had access to behind the counter knows where it is. It would be nice if someone put it in a very safe place and hasn’t been back for their shift yet. I hope you get your bracelet back!

      • Quotia Zelda

        I wear my grandmother’s charm bracelet almost daily, and my heart would break in a million pieces if I lost it. I’m so sorry yours is missing and in such a frustrating way.

    • Outlander is one of my most re-read books. I find it very comforting. Probably because all the extraneous detail means that I don’t have to think or imagine anything. If it’s relevant, it’s in there. No brain power required.

    • the books are sucky and all over the place. the show is 1000 times better and hotter.

    • You are not alone – I am an avid reader and gave the books a shot. I was bored and felt the writing was poor.

      • She needs an editor in the worst way, it’s true. But she also does well at setting a scene. Seems like a lot of “award winning” literature (and movies, come to think of it) is all about the voids. Things left unsaid. Strategic fast-forwards. Vague references to incidents that are never described. And it’s up to the reader to fill in. I HATE that. Gabaldon leaves nothing to the imagination.

  • Rave: Great run in the cold this morning! Kicked ass on the zoo hill, but the hill on 18th St South of Columbia kicked my ass-perhaps because it was near the end of my run.
    Rant: Need to remember to warm up my hands before getting my kiddo out of bed; she’s CRANKY when my hands are cold & I’m changing her–not that I can blame her when she’s coming out of fleece pjs & a fleece sleep sack.
    Rave: no wake-ups last night! Yay for a full night’s sleep ๐Ÿ™‚
    Rave: Almost the weekend, looking forward to my parents staying with us for a week, Thanksgiving with family, and going to a Caps game Saturday night with cheap lower-bowl tickets from a friend & free parental babysitting!

    • SFT

      Yours will still wear the sleepsack? Can she stand in it? I have some larger ones, but my guy moves so much in his sleep and stands at random points in the night that I haven’t put it on him. Does it curb the standing?

      • I’d be interested to know if it curbs standing as well. Ever since my daughter figured out how to stand in her crib last month we are having a rough time sleeping.

      • She does still wear the sleep sack. Barring her rejecting it at some point, I’m planning on sticking with it until she’s in a bed rather than a crib. She can absolutely stand in it–and walk around too. Halo also makes sleep sacks with feet openings, but we haven’t tried them yet. It doesn’t curb the standing, but that hasn’t been an issue for us. On the plus side, it’s a blanket that stays on her regardless of how much she moves around in her sleep (which can be a lot!). Is there something you’re concerned about with the standing/sleep sack combo?

        • Ha, in my case I was hoping it lessened her actually doing the standing. She used to be able to put herself back to sleep pretty easily, but now that she can stand in her crib she just immediately stands every time she wakes up, meaning that she wakes herself up too much to put herself back to sleep. We just have to get through this phase I suppose – there are much worse things than having to cuddle my baby back to sleep!

          • Oh no! How old is she? We didn’t have a standing-associated sleep regression, but we also sleep trained at around the same time that my daughter started pulling to stand. So that may have helped us skip it. Does she know how to get back down from standing? I’ve heard that that issue can cause problems sometimes. So maybe she just needs help learning how to get back down? But ugh, interrupted sleep is the worst. And these days, since I’m not used to it, I have such a hard time falling back asleep after dealing with night wakings.

          • She is 10.5 months (9 months adjusted – she was a preemie). While she has been able to pull to stand for a while now, she only started doing it in the crib about 3 weeks ago. She can definitely get herself back down – I think she just would rather not be alone! We also kind of sleep trained, but did around 6 months, so this has thrown a new wrench into things. I’m thinking we are just going to have to go through a few days of sleep training again. We have also started letting her sleep with a small stuffed animal, and that seems to have helped. We can lay her back down with the stuffed animal and she will cuddle it until she falls asleep again.

          • I’m all about the loveys–my daughter has several in her crib, though there’s one she’s mostly attached to. But having the extras means it’s easy for her to find something soft if she rolls around. Sometimes she’s cuddled up with something besides her favorite when I check on her before I go to bed. Glad to hear that the stuffed animal helps!

          • standing has made sleep so much worse!!! At least he can walk and not fall. We’ve started putting a few soft toys in his crib to encourage him to snuggle with them vs. wait for us. We sleep trained at 4 months. It never really took once he could move a lot (around 6 months). We got a month of free Dropcam monitoring and when I see how much he moves and wakes up in his sleep, it explains a lot about his overall tiredness during the day. He doesn’t always cry – sometimes he just stands up, then goes back to sleep – but he isn’t getting long stretches of restful sleep. Not sure how to help this.

          • He may just need to age out of it? Could be excitement to work on new skills, and maybe he’ll sleep better once they don’t seem so exciting anymore. Fingers crossed!

        • SFT

          My guy walks around when he wakes up, so I just figured it would trip him. Maybe I’ll give it a try tonight and see how it goes. I had just totally written off the sleepsacks after he learned how to stand up. Hmmm….

  • Rant: Girlfriend’s father in need of rush surgery and I’ll miss her as she spends Thanksgiving with him in the hospital.
    Rave: Living (for another couple of weeks anyway, until the house is finished) with the kindest, most caring, most reliable individual I know. She will be there with a bottle and the bail money, no matter what time you call.
    Rave/rant: not having the hassle of hosting and coordinating Thanksgiving dinner/not trusting the (young, delightful) woman in charge. Ah, what the heck — It’s only 8 people this year, barely more than a family dinner. And I can kick back and just focus on a couple of loaves of brioche, a side dish and decanting. If only I like football more….

  • Rave – I’m not traveling back to my parent’s house for Thanksgiving this year. I have spent so much money and time on stressful Thanksgiving travel over the years and I’m just so tired of it. I am looking forward to waking up in my own bed on Thanksgiving, not having to go anywhere, and relaxing in my own home with my SO and friends.
    Rave – My parents are very understanding and they have decided to come visit me in DC after Thanksgiving. They are the best.
    Rave – Lots of work travel this week allowed me to binge-listen to the Serial. For the first time in my life I wished that train ride from NYC to DC was longer so I could finish all the episodes.
    Rant – Have a lot of work to accomplish today and feeling lazy and unmotivated.

  • That picture reminds me that there was giant gravel/small bits of concrete (?) taking up the bike lane (or what would be the naturally place for a cyclist to ride in lieu of a dedicated bike lane) on 18th Street going North from Lauriol Plaza to Columbia Rd. It was really annoying and potentially dangerous. I made it up the hill ok… did anyone else experience this?

  • For those of you who put your babies in day care, how many wait lists did you join? We are trying to figure out what’s a reasonable number to guarantee us a spot when maternity leave is over.

    • It is going to depend on your neighborhood (or which neighborhood you want your baby to go to daycare in if it isn’t the one you live in). We chose to go with a daycare around our house in Petworth as they are significantly cheaper than the ones downtown. We only got on two wait lists and got into both.

    • I might be the outlier, but I got on about 15 wait lists- mostly gov centers, a few private. I paid the stupid application fee on all of them. I got in to CCLC @ 2200 (no fee for the wait list) and that was it. Because it’s a private center, it turned out to be the same price as our nanny once we found a share family (we do a part time share – it’s amazing as is our current nanny – one reason I’m worried about moving out of DC is because we love her so much). When I was getting ready to go back to work, I called every center and was SHOCKED at how rude they were about giving me a status update on the wait list. Some couldn’t even find our names (but sure cashed out checks!). And I got on those lists when I was 5-6 weeks pregnant. I still haven’t gotten calls about a space (which I wouldn’t take at this point). Mine is simply a cautionary tale. It ended up working for the best because I love our childcare arrangement.

  • Rant: Trying to wade through child support woes with someone who is dutifully trying to pay but sandwiched between Maryland and Virginia laws without a good advocate. Anyone have suggestions for good lawyers or pro bono groups?

    Rave: At least it’s Friday

    • Have you tried the law school clinics? I believe a few of them have family law clinics – maybe GW? They’re all heavily supervised by licensed, real lawyers.

  • Rave: 2 kittens adopted + marriage proposal! Two of my new batch of foster kittens were adopted yesterday as an engagement present. I had been told the guy was going to propose, but hadn’t expected him to pull out the ring and drop to one knee right here in my office with kittens in hand.

    Two other super playful and friendly kittens still available! See Bizzy & Stachio here on Flickr, at my house in Columbia Heights anytime, or at PetMAC adoption event tomorrow in Arlington. All adoptions go through Homeward Trails. https://www.flickr.com/photos/organize/?start_tab=new_set

  • Rave: New avatar, although it’s quite small. Image of the book “Drunken Botanist” next to a cocktail
    Rave: Warby Parker try-on glasses came yesterday and I like three out of the five pairs
    Rant: Weight loss was trending in the right direction until a few days ago, sigh.

  • Musing: being the only one under 50 on my team has led to some interesting technology trainings. I spent 3.5 hours in a workshop on how to Google. I had to help my 65 year old coteacher open the Chromebook. Not turn it on, but open it.
    Rave: at least I get paid for it!

    • Oh man, I can only imagine. I can barely handle my parents’ technical issues, I can’t imagine dealing with coworkers.

      • Andie302

        I would think co-workers would be better because of some sense of boundaries. My mom has no qualms about texting or calling at 8am on a Sunday about a tech problem.

        • My father is technically challenged – fortunately my brother is closer and more technically adept than me.

        • My mom just ran through her list of technical issues that she’d like me to address over thanksgiving. It’s annoying but I actually don’t mind all that much, it’s mostly frustrating trying to help over the phone so I’d much rather do it in person.

          • Accountering

            Good on you. I have been in the same place with my parents, but they are normally pretty good. I only think how frustrating it must be to be on the other side, and not know how to do what you want to do. Especially when you think it must be fairly simple.

          • I told my parents I’m buying them a new modem and router and installing it for Christmas. Theirs are at least 10 years old and my mom wants to replace her laptop because she thinks it’s the problem. My parents are great, but it’s the blind leading the blind in that house. My mom says that now she can’t use iTunes, so that means no more iTunes, not trying to fix the problem.

          • I’ve used Log Me In so I can see my father’s computer screen and control the mouse. Thus able to open up a screen that had been minimized, etc. This used to be free (haven’t needed to use it for awhile)

          • Thanks for the recommendation. It doesn’t appear to be free any more, but that or something like it is probably worth it.
            My biggest problem though is that my mom keeps a lit of things for me to teach her, and I do, and she takes notes, but then when she sits down to do it herself later she gets overwhelmed and throws her hands up. There’s not much I can do about that. She goes to CVS and puts her SD card in the machine, selects and edits them all there and get a CD because no matter how many times I show her, she can’t upload her digital camera pics to her computer.

          • jeslett, my father also has me walk through things step by step and he’ll write down instructions. We’ll go over the process again, and I’ll have him do the different steps. All good, right?
            But then something is slightly different – he has to re-enter a password, or he has to click no, he doesn’t want the special offer – and that throws him off.
            While I want him to be self-sufficient, I also know how frustrating it is for him when he can’t find the screen because it has been minimized, or can’t follow the carefully written step by step instructions because something is a little different.
            Did Log Me In offer a free trial? If not, perhaps you could try for a month and see if it is worthwhile to continue.

        • Yeah, but I can my mom I’m done helping her and she needs to procure professional help. If your coworkers just don’t get it and you’re their only resource, you’re going to get pestered.

        • The other day my mother text messaged me a photo taken with her crappy phone of two photos she wanted me to paste on Facebook for her because she couldn’t figure out how.

    • My first job out of college I was the default IT person, for the same reason that you are.

      The best was the time our deputy director called me into his office because he “lost the internet”.

      He had minimized the window and couldn’t find it.

    • We did iPad training at my old job and I remember about 20 minutes into the training one of my colleagues interrupted the instructor to ask which side was up and how to correctly hold the iPad. We did not get very far in that pilot program.

  • Mug of Glop

    Rave: Heading out to Philadelphia tomorrow to run the marathon on Sunday.
    Rant: I have to pack tonight. And it’s gonna be kind of chilly on race day.
    Inevitable Terror: I have to run a marathon on Sunday.
    Rave: Carb-loading.
    Rant: Probably shouldn’t use alcohol as that carb…

  • Rave: Babysat 2 great kids last night. One was asleep already (she’s a momma’s girl so that was easier on me) and the older one and I had a great time reading nursery rhymes and singing before bed! Spent half the money taking an Uber to the burbs to see the boy after, but glad I could help out a great family ๐Ÿ™‚
    Rave 2: Spending the weekend with the boy – go carting, drinks with friends and brunch all planned – he’s being great in letting me choose most of the weekend activities since my best friend is moving away.
    Rave 3: Getting excited for Thanksgiving with my cousins and couslets – I don’t get to see them nearly enough, and it’s almost worth not going home just to see everyone (really, I’m staying to study for a final and am being taken in. Family is great that way!).
    Rant: People using speakerphones when you’re in a cube farm or talking loudly on the phone. I get it’s often necessary for business, but it’s often grating or distracting…. at least it’s not that bad of a rant, though!
    Rave 4: Got my official conversion date at work from temp to perm! Lots of celebrating coming up after my final! (Finals first, then fun ๐Ÿ™‚ )

  • Oh hush. Let her enjoy their honeymoon phase–and may it last a nice long time ๐Ÿ™‚ Just skip over her posts if you don’t want to read about it. ๐Ÿ˜›

    • Weird. This was in response to a reply to Andie’s post above. Not sure why it ended up down here. Oh well. Andie–feel free to share away, I’m glad you guys are happy ๐Ÿ™‚

      • Probably in the time that you were responding to whoever was being negative about Andie’s post, the offending post was deleted.

      • I think Dan erased the original snarky message. And I heartily agree with you.

      • I was thinking that might have been the issue. Figured I’d clarify since it seemed like a non sequitor as it ended up. ๐Ÿ™‚

        • Andie302

          I missed the snark – but thanks you all for being so positive!

          I so want to spend a day with Dan and just read all the nasty stuff that comes in that he gets to delete. I catch it once in awhile and am fascinated that people feel like it’s okay to say because they are sitting behind a computer.

          I’m sorry if people are tired of hearing about our relationship, but I assure you I was on here complaining like others about being single (and sharing bits and pieces of the ridiculous crap that happened while dating).

          • I don’t think you’ve been overdoing it.
            I’m on another forum with a person who was single for a long time and then got in a serious relationship… but it’s an open relationship, so she’s still having first/second/etc. dates with other people. HER posts about these other dates come across as gloating.

          • I’m coming to this sub-thread late, but wanted to add that I’m one of the people who likes hearing your relationship developments! And I would also love to see what weird stuff Dan gets to wade through. I’m guessing most of it is just obnoxious trolling, but I’m guessing that 10-20% of it is actually a combination of awful and hilarious.

          • Shawess — Of the posts that I’ve reported to Dan (or that I’ve glimpsed before he spotted and deleted them), there’s usually not much hilariousness involved. Mainly awfulness. ๐Ÿ™

          • Emmaleigh504

            I like updates on good, happy relationships just as much as dating horror stories. [I”m nosy and want to know every thing about everyone on this site] Keep ’em coming!

        • Eesh, Textdoc. I wonder why people would spend their time looking for opportunities to say terrible things here. It just doesn’t seem to be worth the effort.

          • Fortunately the vast majority of PoPville people are at least civil, and quite often nice/friendly. ๐Ÿ™‚

          • Shawess I think the same reason people write horrible things in comments on other forms of media. I’ve made the mistake of looking at comments on WPost articles – ugh. Many of the comments after the Rolling Stones article Textdoc linked to above are beyond belief.

  • Aglets

    Rave: So ready for the weekend, even if i have nothing planned.
    Rave: the weather looks pretty good for sunday when I’ll be working outside all day so hooray!
    Rant: Unexpected complete repainting of aprtment (requested a wall repair to fix crumbling plaster (quite a lot of crumbling plaster) ended up with a total paint job so i’m trying to put my stuff back piece by piece from a giant pile in the center of my living room.
    Rave: Using this as a chance to purge and deep clean after living in this place for 5 years
    Rave: the painter, FWIW did a nice, careful job.
    Rave: I’ve really enjoyed this rant/rave outlet. Thanks POP and other POPvillians

  • rave: friday! weekend! reuniting with my bff tonight, date tomorrow, hunger games sunday.
    rant: My brother. He lives in atl, but his in-laws are in this area, but he never makes the time or effort to try and see me when he and his family are up here visiting, like they are now. I’m less irked this time, because I’ll see him next week, but still. One time he was 3 miles away for nearly a week and didn’t even text hi. And we’re close! Which may be why he doesn’t feel like he has to reach out, but it hurts my feelings. I know it has to do with balancing the families, but it still hurts.

    • Have you told him this? He may not realize? Even with family balancing acts, this seems kind of crappy.

      • Andie302

        He may also not want you to feel obligated to spend time with his in-laws and their family, so he doesn’t extend an invite. My guess is, though, that he hasn’t noticed or thought about it.

    • If his wife or in-laws have a problem with inviting you to join them, or him getting away to meet you for dinner or lunch, then I feel bad for him about the family he married into.
      But maybe your brother just doesn’t know it bothers you? Something similar used to happen with my brother, it just didn’t occur to him to combine purposes but once I pointed it out he got better about calling me when he was in town.

      • It’s a little bit of this. My SIL is odd, and has an odd sense of family balance. My bro goes along partly because they spend significantly more time with our family than hers. He mentions that he wishes they had more time to see me when they are up there, but it’s always so busy and hectic, etc etc. Which it is busy and hectic because that family is a cluster. If I wasn’t seeing them next week I’d probably impose myself on them and not even feel bad about it. Anyways, I’m not sure I’ve specifically said it hurts my feelings but I’ve mentioned that I’d like to see him/the kiddos. I’ll say something, though.

        • I’d be hurt if my brother can’t separate a few hours to meet up while he’s up here visiting his in-laws. If the inlaws/wife issues with that, I really feel sorry for your brother.

    • Accountering

      Family can be stressful. All my family is in MN, and I was in MN just for an evening (and the next day for work) and just popped in, had a beer that night, and then went to work the next day. It was similar, I live 1000 miles from family, but was probably 5 miles from them all, but really just wanted to focus on work (and got to bed early so I could run along the Mississippi the next morning!) and made a point of not reaching out. Different situation, but its certainly possible.

      • I think family (mine and hers) stresses out my SIL. It’s one thing if it’s a quick trip for work. My sister did that not too long ago, but she did text and say she was in town and thinking of me and wished she had time to see me. It’s different, especially with kids, when it’s an extended vacation with the only purpose being visiting family. My SIL is weird tho and really has not assimilated into our family all that well, even after 10+ years. Although I do love and care for her very deeply, she just has her quirks.

  • jim_ed

    Rant/Rave?: They finally got around to painting the house being flipped next door, and its…. pewter? dark bronze? It’s definitely not traditional flipper yellow or gray, but I’m not sure how I feel about it yet, because it is a bizarre color choice.

    Rant: DDot’s plan to fix the intersection where Kennedy, Missouri, and Kansas all meet is idiotic, and involves putting a turnaround circle at the end of a dead end street like its the entrance to a Florida country club. The community, unsurprisingly, hated it.

    Rave: I can’t stop hate-watching Parenthood. It has to be one of the worst shows I’ve ever seen, and I can’t stop laughing at it, much to my wife’s annoyance. Seriously, it has taken the “White People Problems” genre into a whole different stratosphere.

    • SFT

      I binge watched Parenthood over the 2012 Christmas/New Years vacation, which happened to be the same time that I got pregnant. Coincidence? I hate the Braverman’s too, but can’t stop watching. I thank the sweet baby Jane that this is the last season. I also have a pretty big girl crush on Swimfan!

      • jim_ed

        Every episode gives me new opportunities to figure out what kind of serial killer Max becomes, and how his parents will try to make it seem like its no big deal once he’s been arrested for having 28 headless torsos in the basement. Also, anyone who would allow their children to attend their school should have social services called on them. There’s never any teachers around and all the kids just seem to aimlessly loiter in the halls, which seems like a poor combination for kids who are supposed to have behavioral issues.

        • SFT

          Right…Max is going to be one of those creepy guys who stalks people with his camera. The police are going to find him locked in a room covered with Dylan-photo wallpaper and he’ll be dancing with her corpse. He’ll brush her hair, put her in pretty clothes, and they’ll have deep conversations.

          • SFT

            And can I just add, I really hope that Zeke dies and that Bonnie Bedelia whores it up. She really seems like she needs some action…and a plot line!

          • Haha yes Bonnie Bedelia needs some action. There was a fling or something between her and her art teacher but it didn’t really go anywhere.

            I really hate Christina’s character. She just never shuts up. Amber is also annoying because she never stops crying about everything. Also that scene last season with her and Ryan in the hospital bed was soooo awkward to watch.

          • SFT

            I think more than anything, I hate the voice-over guy who is always telling us that we can’t miss an episode of the moving farewell season. I think jim_ed put it perfectly, I’m totally hate-watching it!

          • jim_ed

            That is by far the most likely ending to Max and Dylan, and I’m angry at myself for not thinking of it first. The hate-watch is strong with you.

        • Are you serious? I firmly disagree- think parenthood is one of the better written shows on TV. I

          Also that’s kind of a mean thing to say about Max, it’s known to be one of the best and most accurate portrayals of someone with Aspergers and has done a lot for the cause: http://www.buzzfeed.com/emilyorley/how-parenthood-broke-down-the-autism-awareness-barrier

          • I’ll join the chorus – I watched a few episodes of Parenthood a year or two ago and thought it was awful. I thought the writing was terrible – contrived, clearly designed to pull emotional strings in the most obvious way, but worst of all predictable. You can see where all the plot lines are going in the first 5-10 minutes. And most annoying to me is that sort of “controlled chaos” dialog thing that they seem to put in every scene – where people are simultaneously talking to/at/over each other, you know, the way real families do?!? I just couldn’t find anything insightful, clever, or interesting about it.

          • jim_ed

            I think that’s been valid for most of the show, but this current season has Max looking more and more like a budding predator. He attacked Dylan and his parents were all like “ehhhh, it’s whatever. You didn’t do anything wrong when you started grabbing at her chest.” If Christina won’t correct his behavior when he’s stalking, harassing, and trying to assassinate the character of other students, where exactly does she draw the line?

  • Rave – This video: youtu.be/iieQDN7l_Yw
    Rave – Parents coming to town for Thanksgiving this year. Dad hasn’t been able to visit for a couple years. Very excited to have him in town.
    Rant – Preparing the menu when everyone else can eat all of the Thanksgiving staples, and I have ridiculous food allergies and intolerances, which essentially has me preparing two menus.
    Rant – Anyone want to come over and help me clean the house?

    • Andie302

      I’ll clean yours if you clean mine. I’m betting we both get a more thorough result and feel like it was more productive than cleaning our own. Warning: I have two roommates and haven’t been upstairs in awhile…so who knows what’s going on up there!

      • Ha! Sounds like a good plan. My boyfriend and I use separate bathrooms and I haven’t been in his in a while. It also happens to be the guest bathroom. So it’ll need a little extra love for my Momma. Might want to bring gloves.

  • Rant: kind of funny how there was a discussion about dating and the fade away a few days ago. Recently went on first date and agreed about going on 2nd date at end of 1st date. Contacted her about setting up 2nd date, zero responses for the past week. So frustrating, with people who can’t communicate as adults.

    Rave: Friday and payday

    • Emmaleigh504

      I’m sorry you got the fade. It seems to be happening a lot right now. What is wrong with people?!

      • I was talking about this with a friend yesterday and we think that people just don’t want to deal with the pressure of a new relationship right before/during the holidays. But I have no idea why they go on dates to begin with if that’s the case!

        • Andie302

          I was once dating a guy in college during the spring and when I tried to have the exclusive talk (because, you know, we were having a lot of fun and enjoying each other’s company) he was all “ohh, but summer is coming up.” Turns out he’s kind of a manwhore, but it was fun while it lasted!

    • That sucks. Sorry.

    • “Recently went on first date and agreed about going on 2nd date at end of 1st date.”
      She said that just to be agreeable, so she would not have to reject you face-to-face. Or perhaps she was simply on-the-fence about you and needed more time to think about it, eventually coming to the conclusion that she was not interested in you. It’s easier for a woman to say “yes” at that moment than say “no” and deal with a guy who might flip out on her (yes….insecure, entitled men do this with regularity). It sucks, but them’s the breaks.

  • Rave: Paula Poundstone tonight, hope she’s just as funny live as on Wait Wait.
    Rave 2: Thanksgiving starts Saturday with friendsgiving. And then two more times next week.
    Rant: A little sad it’ll be my first thanksgiving ever not being with family but good friends will be substitute family this year.
    Mixed: One parent’s marriage is on its last legs, this is will not be an easy transition. At least I’m missing the likely tense interactions over the holiday next week.

    • Emmaleigh504

      I love Paula! My family got one of our favorite phrases from her: “tidying up” when you eat the last cookie or whatever. It’s from her poptart bit that was on 1/2 hour comedy hour about a million years ago.

  • Rave: Got in to two law schools this week! It feels great to have a sense of security this early in the process.
    Rave: Started Serial earlier this week and just finished episode 9. I can’t say I’m totally hooked but the concept is interesting.
    Rant: My office is an igloo.

  • Rant: A friend of a friendโ€™s 2-yr. old son nearly drowned this past spring and has a long recovery road ahead of him. Itโ€™s a heartbreaking story. She had just given birth to her second child the day before and she and her husband were still in the hospital with the new baby. Family was watching the 2-yr. old at home when he slipped away and fell into the family pool. I follow her updates on Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/TurtlePowerForJamesEdwards) โ€“ the family is absolutely amazing and there is so much love for this little boy and his recovery.

    One of her good friends is hosting an Instagram auction (Iโ€™d never heard of one, but itโ€™s a cool concept) to help raise money for medical bills and therapy. The auction items are mostly childrenโ€™s items, but if anyone is shopping for a little one this holiday season, you should check it out. A great way to shop and help โ€ฆ the Instagram page is @turtlepowerauction.

    • Aglets

      yikes! My did pulled a stunt like that when he was around the same age. He turned around. I’ll think positive thoughts for your friend!

      • I know — it tugs at my heart because I know how easily it can happen and can’t imagine what they’re going through. Thanks for thinking of her.

  • epric002

    rant: disaster of a morning: puppy pulled off his bandage and tried to eat his foot, had to get him to vet by myself. forgot my shoes for work. destroyed my tights wrestling puppy away from foot/into cone/into car/into vet. no parking at work. late for work when i’m hosting a meeting. boss (who i’m hosting the meeting for) took the day off and didn’t bother to tell me or anyone else. only 1/2 of the people who should have been there showed up.
    rave: puppy is fine. awesome coworker who helped me finish prepping for meeting. got free tix to the tartan ball sat night. it’s friday. holy shit i need a drink.

    • Oof what a stressful start to your day. Glad you pup is doing well and hope you get that drink tonight ๐Ÿ™‚

      • epric002

        thanks pixie ๐Ÿ™‚ i took a long lunch and had a glass of wine. am feeling much more zen now ๐Ÿ˜› and i remembered an additional rave: CVS at work sells tights so i got to replace them before my meeting so i didn’t look like i’d been wrestling with a lawnmower.

    • Yikes– I hope he won’t be in the bandage/cone too much longer.

      I just bought the Wellness Simple food last night and am hoping it works well for my guy. Thanks again for the rec!

      • epric002

        thanks aliceindc! good luck with the food- which formula did you try? i went with the lamb/oatmeal one b/c he previously had issues with taste of the wild salmon forumula. it may be a specific protein that’s causing your guy problems.

  • RANT: the UVA gangrape cover-up and scandal (google the new Rolling Stone article). These sick f#cks are the same people coming to work in DC in droves year after year. When are we finally going to get rid of the cesspool that is the Greek system?
    RAVE: This bad press couldn’t have happened to a douchy’er institution. I hope heads roll.

    • Them’s fighting words. Beware the wrath of the dudebro.

    • I just read that article this morning. Uggh.

      The frat system isn’t going anywhere unfortunately though.

    • For anyone else interested in reading the article, here’s the link:
      I’m reading it now and it’s really, really disturbing.

      • Oh man, this scares the crap out of me. I was an idiot as a college freshman, and what could have happened to me there terrifies me. (Not suggesting the victims are idiots – just that I was, mostly just too stuck on searching for approval & external validation) I looked at UVA, but never applied. Terrifying.

      • I think what was especially disturbing was that two days ago, I was reading a New York Times article about how some students accused of rape are now bringing lawyers to their university judicial processes (http://www.nytimes.com/2014/11/20/nyregion/new-factor-in-campus-sexual-assault-cases-counsel-for-the-accused.html), and the reader comments on the article (and interviews with lawyers) were making it sound as though false accusations of rape were fairly common on campus.
        The Rolling Stone article mentioned that “studies indicate that false rape reports account for, at most, eight percent of reports” — something I remember the NYT reporting on a while back (and most of those false reports don’t accuse a particular person, but rather an unknown stranger). But what was really fascinating was this:
        “Most of that hooking up is consensual. But against that backdrop, as psychologist David Lisak discovered, lurk undetected predators. Lisak’s 2002 groundbreaking study of more than 1,800 college men found that roughly nine out of 10 rapes are committed by serial offenders, who are responsible for an astonishing average of six rapes each. None of the offenders in Lisak’s study had ever been reported. Lisak’s findings upended general presumptions about campus sexual assault: It implied that most incidents are not bumbling, he-said-she-said miscommunications, but rather deliberate crimes by serial sex offenders.”

        • What the article doesn’t specificy is if it is 8% of rape cases reported to the police or to campus authorities or both. Perhaps the percentage is higher for those incidents just reported to campus authorities (and which would explain that NYT article and the accompanying comments).

          • The 8% was for rape in general, not limited to college campuses. Will see if I can find the NYT article summarizing that study…

          • I think this is what I was thinking of:
            An analysis by Slate pointing out some of the flaws in the graphic shows that the number of false reports that specifically accuse someone is even _smaller_ that the graphic would suggest.

          • The group that came up with the graphic provided some background here:
            They linked to this study, which says that when you look at “methodologically rigorous research,” the “estimates for the percentage of false reports begin to converge around 2-8%.” :
            I’m still reading the above study, so I’m not clear if it also provides a percentage for false _accusations_ — I think it’s the Slate analysis that distinguishes accusations (accusing a specific person) from reports (reporting a rape).

          • What the above-linked study says:
            ‘Despite the stereotype, false reports of sexual assault are not typically filed by women trying to โ€œget back at a boyfriendโ€ or cover up a pregnancy, affair, or other misbehavior. While there are examples of this kind of false report, the vast majority are actually filed by people with serious psychological and emotional problems. In these situations, the person files a false report for the attention and sympathy that they receive. This explains many โ€œrealโ€ false reports do not involve a named suspect, because the intention is not to get someone in trouble with the police. Rather, many โ€œrealโ€ false reports involve only a vaguely described stranger, so the victim can receive the caring attention of law enforcement officials and social service providers without the fear that someone will be arrested.’

    • Wow. Way too many similarities with my alma mater. And – that song – that song is a disgrace.

  • justinbc

    Rave: Went to Donburi last night for their birthday celebration, food was outstanding (especially at half priced). Can’t believe I’ve been missing out on this place for so long, if only it were more convenient to my office!
    Rave: Don’t have to be back in the office til December, screw you cold weather!
    Have a good weekend everyone, I should have December HH details nailed down and posted next week!

  • Rave: Being proactive and trying to plan party and vacation schedule for the end of the year.
    Rant: Can’t find online information about the Bancroft PTA Christmas Tree sale. I like to support the school but want to have a tree before I have a party.
    Question: Any MtP residents or Bancroft PTA parents on here know when the sale is?

  • Our family’s 17 year old puppy, Missy, passed away this morning – so sweet, so fluffy, so cute, and so smelly…we all loved her so much. Give hugs and cuddles to your loved pups and kitties for us.

  • Rave: Two interviews this week (one yesterday, one at 315 today) for internal positions. I applied for them in September, but they finally just got to the interview stage. Each is hiring 2-3 people, and plans to make offers before Christmas which is great because…
    Rant: My current project is ending and therefore my job is too. My last day is Jan 31, if nothing else comes up. Yes, federal projects can come to the end of their funding and employees can be let go; unfortunately I am proof of it.
    Rave: My boss, who is letting me go, is on leave until Dec 4, so… it will be nice not to see him for a while.

  • maxwell smart

    RANT: My work computer is without a doubt the slowest POS that I end up spending most of the day just waiting for it to load, process, and usually crash. I’ve complained to IT and they can’t do anything about it. So it takes 3x longer to do anything then it should. The irritating this is there are people who got new, better, computers who are not power users like I am. Wasted money.
    RAVE: Plently of time to comment on Popville as I am sitting here, again, waiting for the graphics card to load something.

  • Hosting Thanksgiving for the first time. In my tiny apartment. Already stressful enough. It was supposed to be a friend and I cohosting but everyone I invited had other plans (totally fine, it’s a family holiday). So it’s all her friends, only one of whom I’ve ever met before. So I’m doing all this work and spending all this money for people I don’t even know. And she keeps emailing me with things to remember to do or ideas how to the turkey. I’m so over it. I’m thisclose to canceling and telling everyone where to put that turkey.

    Happy Thanks*&(^giving.

    • Andie302

      Oh noooo….try to scale back and maybe some of her friends that join you will become your friends? I don’t think it’s wrong to put your foot down and say I’m doing x,y, and z (that you’re comfortable with) and explain that others joining will need to pick up the slack. For people that don’t want to cook, they can bring drinks, napkins, whatever. Sorry you’re in this position…I hope it turns out better than what you’re expecting.

    • anonymouse_dianne

      Harris Teeter has special dinners for $50 – all the work is done and the food is good. Turkey dinner to serve 6-8 includes all the trimmings. Also a ham dinner and a prime rib dinner. Check it out.

    • Not sure how much work you’ve already put in, but there’s also the Black Squirrel option ($7 buffet starting at 12 noon).
      It does sound like a pain to host Thanksgiving in a small place, where all the guests are someone else’s friends.

      • People are bringing ti

        • People are bringing things, I don’t have to do everything. I just feel taken advantage of. It’s awkward enough hosting a regular party when you have to do the introductory conversation. And my friend is now asking everyone to bring things for a care package for a friend of hers deployed overseas, and asked me to ask someone I know that works at a place known for soaps, lotions, etc (I’m trying to remain somewhat anonymous) to have her donate things. I don’t know this girl overseas from Adam – I’m not asking someone who’s even more removed from her to ask her company for things!

          I will be having a conversation with my friend – otherwise I’m going to end up in a massive meltdown. I may anyway.

          • Definitely have a conversation with the friend — the sooner, the better.
            The more time elapses, the more your frustration will increase. And then it’ll be hard to figure out how to start the conversation in a manner other than “WHERE DO YOU GET OFF DOING XYZ??”

  • For all of you who commented yesterday on the NYT Thanksgiving recipes by state, the public editor has weighed in and there are some choice passages here #grapegate http:// publiceditor. blogs.nytimes.com/2014/11/20/new-york-times-minnesota-grape-salad/

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