Random Reader Rant and/or Revel

Photo by PoPville flickr user pablo.raw

You can talk about whatever is on your mind – quality of life issues, a beautiful tree you spotted, scuttlebutt, or any random questions/thoughts you may have. But please no personal attacks and no need to correct people’s grammar. This is a place to vent and/or celebrate things about daily life in DC.

320 Comment

  • Rave/Rant?: Got a huge promotion about three months ago to another department and am now being considered for another possible promotion to another team within my current department. The previous employee in the position is now our office’s #2. I know a lot of people in my department are vying for the slot. I was told that my skill set was the most “desirable” for this position, but am unsure what that means about how my skills mesh with my current position. I thought I was doing really well! Having a hard time believing that maybe, after years toiling in a terrible office previously, I’m finally getting recognized for doing good work. Can this be true?! Am I just a pawn in a larger scheme?! Where’s Frank Underwood hiding?

    • justinbc

      Sounds awesome, well done!

    • You’re on a roll. Run with it until your luck changes and you have to hunker down for a while. There will be times when you toil months and years in tedious anonymity through no fault of your own, while now a couple of lucky breaks combined with your stellar performance during the off years is paying off.
      Besides, everyone in this town is just a pawn in a larger scheme. Some are just making more money at it.

  • justinbc

    For anyone who missed it yesterday, October’s PoP HH will be at Sauf Haus in Dupont on the 23rd. Their HH includes $8 half-liters, $14 liters, and $2 off other drinks, as well as $2 off all pretzel items. The HH deals run from 4-7PM, but we’ll be there a lot later than that in case you can’t make it in time to take advantage of the specials. The space is actually quite large, with indoor and semi-outdoor options, so our specific location will probably depend on the weather that day. Will post more reminders as the date gets closer.

  • Rant: Entitled drivers! Traffic on 395 North towards NY Ave was an absolute mess after work. After inching along from the middle of the first tunnel, I finally make it to the turn to NY Ave when this schmuck decides he’s more important than everyone else and rides the shoulder all the way up next to me and forces his way in front of me. He’s still mostly on the shoulder, so I swing around in the legal travel lane and he speeds up into my lane again and then has the nerve to flash a badge on necklace at me, like some kind of threat. Sorry, dude, but 1) you’re in your personal vehicle, so no special privileges for you; 2) that badge could be for a rent-a-cop agency as much as an actual law enforcement agency, so I’m not impressed; and 3) if you are a cop, that just makes it worse! You are fully aware of traffic laws and still chose to break them! Grrrr…I was so mad I was shaking.

    • Nobody breaks laws with the gusto cops bring to breaking the law. I bet he was a skinhead wearing blueblockers.

    • I’ve started carrying a little “Ohm” coin in my car to rub when people inevitably do stupid thing. It’s really the only thing that keeps me sane in instances such as these.

    • I’m laughing so hard – not at you, but at the knucklehead who tried to pull this. Cops use unmarked cars all the time, but they’ll have a card or the siren in the window if they need to get somewhere fast. I’m picturing someone flashing their work ID to try and justify this, and it’s killing me. (Side note – most people are THAT important only wear their badge when they absolutely have to – no one but interns wears their badge all the time on the Hill – this is a running joke).

      Think I can use my government contractor issued key card to get around traffic going home tonight?

  • Ladies with pixie cuts: I’m ready to break up with my current stylist. Any recs for who I should go to? Bonus points for being under $70 and in Dupont/West End/Logan/adjacent neighborhoods.

    • Kendall at Parlour Salon near 16th and U St handles my pixie cut, I highly recommend him. He charges $45 for a trim, but prices go up if you get a major haircut.

      • I go to Kendall too! I don’t have a pixie cut, but really adore Kendall. Word of warning: his cuts are relatively affordable, but he’s -good- at selling hair products and extra services. I’m very rarely a sucker for upselling, but find it had to leave there without at least a small bag. And to be honest, I usually think it’s worth it 🙂

        • Haha I know! I always leave there with some new styling cream.

          • I have a pretty serious cabinet of Bumble & Bumble and Oribe products after going to him for two years and still use almost all of the products regularly. The only dud was the Oribe curl mousse, which was just a bit too stiff for my taste. If anyone wants to take if off my hands, I’d be happy to give it to you for free so it’s not a pure waste. I’ve probably used it three times.

          • Email shawessdc at gmail dot com

        • Jamie B at Bang on 15th! I’ve been doing the shaggy pixie a la Carey Mulligan and Michelle Williams for two years now and she’s the best. She charges around $45- maybe it’s gone up to $50 (can’t remember). So nice and she doesn’t push products on me at all. Even the guys who hang out in Logan compliment me all the time!

      • EVERYONE at Parlour is good! Any

    • epric002

      joy at glamour & grunge salon in tysons (i know it’s a hike, but IMO totally worth it). cut & blowdry is $75.

  • Rave: The Serial podcast. Fascinating.
    Rant: The Tinderbros are getting worse. Last night, I got messages from 3 different people that just said “SOMF.” They’re not even bothering to write it out anymore!
    Rave-ish/Rant-ish: I have a phone interview later today. The position is so completely outside of my skillset/industry (they found my resume on linkedin and contacted me) and I only had half a day to prepare so I don’t feel ready for it at all. But at least I’ll get some interview practice!

    • I LOVE Serial! I think he’s innocent…but maybe I am a sucker. And Mr. S is a great plot twist!

      • I think he’s innocent too! For some reason, today’s episode hasn’t popped up on my Podcast app and I can’t find it even when I search for it. 🙁 I can’t wait to listen!

    • what does SOMF mean?

      • Accountering is correct. “Sit on my face.” About 60% of the messages I get say this. 🙁

        • Accountering

          This is interesting to me. I am not unfamiliar with the proposition, but the fact that 60% of guys propose this (and use the acronym too?!?)
          ^This is why I love reading POPVille! Haha

        • This sounds like some sort of spambot, TBH. Then again, maybe 60% of Tinder’bros are that weird!
          I’d say 20% of girls I get matched with are spambots linking to escort/prostitution websites.

          • Some might be! But a lot of them are longer messages that end with SOMF/sit on my face. E.g. “If I put a chindo on, will you come over and SOMF?” (I had to look up what a chindo was…) O_o
            Why am I on Tinder…. hahah

          • omg, hahahaha @ “chindo.” That sounds like some sort of designer mixed-breed dog.
            If dudes on Tinder are this odd, I feel much better about my prospects as a normal, well adjusted, outgoing male with a job. The bar is soooooooooo low 😀

        • skj84

          Ugh. Thats’s gross. Also another acronym learned! Who needs Urban Dictionary when we have PoPville?!

        • justinbc

          60%?! Either this is way more common than it should be (I’ve never even seen this acronym) or you’ve got some in-ter-esting things in your photos.

          • I swear my pictures are super tame! I do get a lot more lewd messages than my other girl friends on Tinder. And I did get asked if I’m a stripper at a party…. ಠ_ಠ
            Brb, reevaluating my life choices.

    • Accountering

      Well, the first choice on google were Service Oriented Modeling Framework, which seems unlikely as it is tinder. The second was a four word saying of what they would like her to sit on, which seems much more likely. Too funny. Me thinks the acronym has about a .5% chance of success, but that may be a bit too generous.

      • The sad thing I’ve learned now that I’m an old is that I have to google these things alongside urban dictionary: “SOMF urban dictionary” That usually works for me. Yeah, I guess they view it like spam. It costs them nothing to put it out there, and it’s worth it for that one rare unicorn woman who would take them up on that.

      • I really did not want to search “SOMF” on a work computer, just in case.

    • You should just start responding with random meaningless acronyms. Or how about “INTBCMF” — “I need to be courted more first!!!”

    • Speaking of podcasts, any recommendations for favorite work-appropriate pods to get you through the day? While at work, I like to listen to Joy the Baker, Men in Blazers, No Challenges Remaining, Stuff You Missed in History Class, and 99% Invisible. If I’m super busy, I often re-play episodes 2 or 3 times in a row to pick up on what I missed. My fave NSFW: Slumber Party with Alie & Georgia and Girl on Guy.

      • I love the Freakonomics podcast, I always learn something interesting.

      • I’m a big fan of almost all of the Slate podcasts — Culture Gabfest, Political Gabfest, The Gist, etc.. The iTunes Slate Daily Podcast subscription is a good entry point, since most of the other podcasts appear in that feed.

      • StarTalk, Wait Wait Don’t Tell Me, This American Life, and Sawbones are my current favorites

        • You basically just repeated my podcast subscription, but I’d also be remiss if I didn’t add Pop Culture Happy Hour, Ask Me Another, and Radiolab.

      • Stuff you Should Know is a great one. Also, Dan Carlin’s Hardcore History, but I’m not sure you’d consider that SFW.

        • Ha! I listened to the most recent from Dan Carlin but they were sooooo long that it was hard to listen to at work. I enjoyed it though.

      • I think most NPR podcasts are work-appropriate in general. I rarely see episodes with warnings. My favorites are Pop Culture Happy Hour, Planet Money, and TED Radio Hour.

        • If you’re looking for short (10-15 minute episodes), I’ve enjoyed the “History of the World in 100 Objects” and BBC’s “Witness” podcasts. Sort of dry compared to some of the others listed here, but I like them b/c they don’t require a big time investment (“Planet Money” is also good for this reason).

    • I briefly tried Tinder and then gave up on it to go back on OKC. It’s easier to make proper conversations on there at least…

      And interview practice is always good! The fact that they contacted you is a good sign at least. 🙂

      • Hinge is pretty good nowadays. I was on it when they first launched, but there were not too many people on it. I signed on again a few days ago for the first time in at least a year and everyone I matched with was (a.) super attractive and (b.) seemed to all be pretty normal/well educated/has a career. It seems a bit more serious and grown up than the OKC and Tinder crowd, IMHO. YMMV.

        • Hmm I tried that about a year and a half ago. I was a little nervous about the friends-of-friends because I thought it made it more awkward to turn someone down if I didn’t end up interested. Perhaps I’ll give it another go though!

          • Most people I’m getting matched with are not even friends-of-friends. More like 2 or 3 degrees of separation, which is where the app really gets you a lot of hits.
            And honestly, I’ve found that most friends-of-friends via FB does not mean that they are close friends. I have a ton of acquaintances in my FB friend list whom I barely see in-person. So I don’t think it would be that awkward. I have no qualms with turning people down, that’s life.
            Go for it! 😀

          • Great to know – thanks! 🙂

        • Interesting. I got Hinge (after ditching Tinder) and have gotten matched with a good amount of guys, but very few messages. A few friends on it have had the same experience. I’d categorize them as attractive and normal!
          Had to look up YMMV, which seems to be the case!

    • homerule

      I’m LOVING the Serial too. Longform journalism at its best.

      • i am trying to refrain from doing my own research on the case presented in Serial… so instead I open Google Maps as I am listening and Wikipedia about the park as a way to not look up actual news articles about it

  • Rave: Dragon no eat moon this morning. Throwing Matt Williams under bus appease gods.

  • Rave: I love my new sectional. I have desperately wanted to have my feet up on the couch, instead of on the coffee table, and I am thrilled with my purchase, research, and shopping around. I recommend Warehouse Showrooms if you’re looking for a new sofa or sofa bed.
    Rave/Rant/Not Sure: my boss suggested that at some point he would probably like me to become a supervisor to one person in our group, I’ve already been informally mentoring her. Well, just one month later he tells me to write this new PD. I’m happy he trusts me with this step, and I like a good challenge, but I’m hitting a wall in terms of wanting a lot more responsibility and moving that far outside my comfort zone. I’m hoping once I learn more management skills I’ll feel better, but I know there are going to be a lot of growing pains. I also think a small part of this is that he doesn’t want to have to deal with this employee anymore.
    Rave: The Green Hat anniversary party last night was fun! John, the proprietor, recognized me and was super friendly.

    • Extra rant: my favorite bloggers, the Petersiks of Young House Love, have decided to move on from their blogging career. I always love their fresh take on things and their honesty. I will miss their blog and DIY inspiration. But I am happy for them and their decision.

    • Accountering

      Direct reports=promotion=more money? You seem like you have your act together big time, and I bet that translates to the working world. Don’t sell yourself short, I am sure you are ready for this next step! Congrats!!

      • Thanks for the encouragement!
        It might not be a grade promotion (I’m not a fed, but we have a grade system we use internally), but it would be some sort of raise. This same thing has already happened in our group, with one person becoming the supervisor of another and she didn’t move up a grade. I don’t know what her raise was like, but we don’t do any managerial training until you are a manager, and I think I need a good amount of money to take that on. We’ll see, it’s not even a guarantee that it will happen.

        • Accountering

          Beers on you at the next HH? 🙂
          In all fairness, to me, it hasn’t been that much of a transition to me, as I was currently already basically managing our team. It sounds like if you are already quasi-managing this person, so the change may not be as drastic as it seems.

    • Jeslett, glad to hear you’re liking your new sectional! How did things work out with the three contenders for your old sofa — did one of them buy it last night?

      • They have all ceased responding to my emails. I’ll re-post with a lower price.

        • Oh, too bad. There are definitely some flakes on Craigslist, as well as people with appalling spelling/writing/communication skills. I had some e-mails that were so cryptic I wasn’t even sure what the writer meant — “Wait, did he mean he was _offering_ me X amount for this item?”

  • Rant: Waiting for the S buses last night and this D-bag walked in front of a bus and when the driver honked at him, he just stood there, staring at the driver- then ran across traffic. Some people.
    Rave: Vacationship! I think I am going to take him Duck pin bowling in Baltimore on Saturday. An entire week still feels realllly long. He leaves on the 23rd, so I can fill you all in when I see you at Sauf Haus!

  • Rave: Got some unexpected free tickets to see The Airborne Toxic Event at 9:30 Club last night and it was super fun. Loved the opening act in particular.

    Rave: Having a rare, good work day where I actually feel on top of things. I’m sure by the end of the day I’ll be in panic mode again but I’ll enjoy this while it lasts.

    RANT: I wrote about this a couple days ago; the crazy loud noises in our attic are probably a racoon. This morning it was DRAGGING SOMETHING. I’m in near hysterics listening to it. The pest control company checked it out and they had to schedule a time to come back since it will involve getting on the roof; they can’t come until MONDAY oh my god someone help me make it that long. In the shower I was convinced it was going to crash through the ceiling and land on top of me. 🙁 🙁 🙁

    • I feel for you, I once had racoons in my basement (that I could not access), they would come back every morning around 5 am and roll paint cans around directly underneath my bedroom. SO LOUD!

    • Wow. I am SO sorry that you’re dealing with this. Sounds incredibly nerve-wracking in addition to being scary! Have you considered calling around to other pest control companies to see if anyone can come immediately? I don’t think I could wait this long, either. I’d be completely flipping out.

      FWIW, PestNow seems to get really good reviews on Angie’s List and has a coupon there for pest control services.

    • Emmaleigh504

      I’m so sorry it’s going to take so long! I once visited my parents and they had squirrels living in the attic above my room and didn’t tell me. I was convinced I was being murdered in the night. The sounds are awful! But the raccoon is probably just dragging a stick.

    • I think someone mentioned this on your other post but call Adcock’s pest service. They are some weird dudes bu they get the job done. They solved an attic problem of mine that involved dead squirrels and maggots. So gross.

  • Rave: Positive pregnancy test 1.5 weeks ago!
    Rant: Waiting to go to the dr. to confirm the test- I still have 2 more weeks to wait.
    Rant: Morning sickness is kicking in and my office is sooo far from the bathroom at work.
    Rave(ish): In a weird way, I don’t mind the morning sickness, since it (likely) means I’m still pregnant

    • Congratulations!!!!!!! Hopefully the morning sickness subsides soon and you can enjoy pregnancy. Carbs carbs carbs helped me through. Good luck 🙂

  • skj84

    Rave: Enjoyed La Mano in Takoma Park yesterday. And I grabbed dinner at Republic as well. Really well done, fast service, good Happy Hour specials and selection. I got a half pint of Flying Dog’s The Fear for $3. The soup of the day was Potato bacon and really hearty. Honestly I just had a cup and was full for the rest of the evening. Plus there is a really neat outdoor space in the back. I will be back!

    Rant: I missed the Tinder/dating stories thread yesterday! I have some doozies.

    • I am happy you enjoyed La Mano yesterday! I’ll have to try Republic.

    • Tinder story, please!! We can always start a new thread today. Why not make it start here? 🙂

      • Emmaleigh504

        +1 bring on the dating stories, tinder or other wise!

      • skj84

        My Tinder story: guy starts the message me. I message back and it’s a bit flirty. No biggie. Until he jumps in with graphic descriptions of the things he wants to do to me. A stranger. Who he has never met in real life. It was literally from “what are your interests” then “what color underwear do you have on” in 0-60. I shut that one down pretty quickly.

  • Accountering

    Rave: 15-minute chair massage at work yesterday. Amazing!
    Rave2: Caps tonight! We have had a mystery night planned for the last couple of months, based on a couple of hints, I deduced that we are going to Caps, and confirmed with planner. I am the only person who has figured it out!
    Rave3: Caps start tonight! Montreal is coming off a game last night, and back-to-back this early in the season is tough. This is a great chance to start off the season with 2 points.

  • Rant: Years ago I had an emotionally abusive boyfriend, the past few days I keep remembering incidents and playing out how I wish I had responded at the time. I did this a lot in the year or so after we broke up, but why now, a decade later?
    Rave: Healthy relationship with a nice guy who never makes me feel that like that guy did.
    Rave: This weather. I don’t even mind the shorter days if it comes with temperatures like this.

    • I feel you girl (guy?). I was in the same situation and recently got a job near his office and have permanent PTSD about possibly bumping into him. Could there be another trigger? Stress at work, problems with girlfriends, etc? I’m glad you’re not in it anymore!

      • Ouch – I am sorry you have to deal with that daily, but also glad that you’re out and not dealing with it more directly anymore. This guy doesn’t live near here (I assume, I actually don’t know where he is) so at least running into him isn’t an issue. No triggers I can think of, but who knows. The Brain is a difficult thing to understand.

    • Heck, I replay youth football errors from 40 years ago in my head I (I still can’t believe I bit on that fake hand-off). As long as it’s occasional, and not obsessive, I wouldn’t worry. If if it affects the relationship with New Boy too much, or you find yourself internet stalking him and sending him one act plays with alternative endings to actual events [Anonymous: An I learned THIS today in from jiu jitsu Master Hong. Boy: N-n-n-no, puh-puh-please — I’ll never steal your phone and send insulting text messages to your friends again. And here’s the money I borrowed!] you can worry.

    • I’m 20 years out from my messed-up relationship, and the creature lives in another country. I STILL do a double-take when I see someone who looks like him. Even though I’m more likely to bump in to the Dalai Lama.

    • It’s not uncommon. I ended a similar relationship like 15+ years ago and I still get random flashbacks about stuff he’d do/say and how I didn’t react at the time for a variety of reasons, but how I SO wish I did.

      I’m in an incredibly healthy long-term relationship now – with someone who would never even THINK about doing anything like the ex, but it doesn’t mean that that part of my life went away entirely.

      Agree with PoPOverWork – there can be triggers – for me, it’s usually when I’m stressed out or unhappy/frustrated with myself.

      My therapist told me it is incredibly common and told me to try to focus on something in the present that makes me happy – something that *I* have control over. It definitely distracts me and eventually allows me to move on in my head.

      Hang in there 🙂

    • I have this happen to me every so often (reliving crap from years ago.) I call them “thought eddies.” Some fairly innocuous and unnoticed trigger pushes you into the thought stream and once you’re there you just keep swirling in circles. You have to find some way to get out of the eddy and force yourself to think about something else. It’ll keep happening for a few days, but eventually with enough conscious nudging the frequency of the intrusive thought will go down. I recommend occupying your mind while doing activities during which you would normally ruminate over these things. For example, if I find myself in a thought eddy, I’ll listen to a comedy channel on Pandora (I recommend Jim Gaffigan :D) while I’m cleaning to make sure I’m not spending that time thinking about the past instead.

      • I hate wearing headphones in public but have been listening to podcasts walking to work this week, I now realize I was probably trying to prevent spending that time in a thought eddy! That’s a perfect description.

        • Yeah, and it’s not like you have to keep doing it indefinitely. After a while when you’ve successfully broken out of the eddy, you can probably go back to being headphone free without a high risk of returning to those thoughts (unless you’ve begun associating those thoughts with a particular activity, which is why it’s important to break out quickly.)

    • Maybe the ‘trigger’ is your current healthy relationship — as in now you’re replaying old scenes with healthier responses, and getting to the point where you can let it go for good.

    • Maybe the trigger is that abusive relationships have been in the news so much recently because of the NFL goings on.
      Negative thoughts are natural and normal, though I imagine these are rather disturbing. Just remember they are thoughts and you can accept that they happen naturally and you can let them go. Hopefully they will go away soon.

    • I hear you. I was in an emotionally abusive relationship about 3 years ago. It really sucks how things linger with you. I still flinch whenever I hear a motorcycle (he forced me to ride his a couple times when he was angry with me, knowing I hated them because my cousin was killed in a motorcycle accident) or when I see the kind of car that he had. I also still get nervous going to the part of town he lived (lives?) in. =/ I was so often nervous of doing anything to upset with my last boyfriend (who was amazing and mellow and never got angry), I could tell that it upset him that I struggled to be completely comfortable with him and apologized so much. He definitely helped, but it’s a long road…

      • I’m glad you found a nice guy to remind you of how much better it can be. I still sometimes go into discussions with my current boyfriend (even/especially over trivial things, like menu planning for the week) armed and ready to defend against the kinds of things my earlier boyfriend would do. Even after this much time and a couple of great boyfriends along the way.

    • Thanks, folks. It’s always reassuring to know other people experience the same sort of thing (even as it makes me sad they have). I know this is a momentary thing and it certainly hasn’t come to the point of learning jiu jitsu to seek revenge!! It was helpful to vent anonymously, I feel like if I brought it up with my friends it would lead to a massive in-depth Discussion when I just wanted to vent a little. So thanks!

  • Rant: the three to four Galludet students who smoke pot in our alley EVERY night between 11:00pm and midnight, while yelling, laughing and loitering around our parking pad. I know there are far worse things, but its waking us up every night and my roommate’s bedroom is on ground floor a mere 30 feet from them. If you want to smoke weed back there, fine–just be quiet!

    Rave: Pot smoking students is a vast improvement over drunk and passed out homeless people sleeping on our parking pad!

    • Why would Galludet students be yelling? I always see them signing to each other to communicate.

      • These kids wear Galludet sweatshirts and may be part of the small percentage that aren’t hearing impaired. Your guess is as good as mine.

      • Emmaleigh504

        perhaps they are woo-boys. They are compelled to yell in the middle of the night. It’s in their DNA or something.

      • Deaf people laugh, just like blind people smile. That’s a human characteristic. Also, plenty of deaf people speak just fine, and perhaps the kids are with hearing friends.

    • Never thought I hear about having to ask Galludet students to keep it down.

      • Actually, noise complaints have been a problem for people living near off-campus Gallaudet students. For one, they’re college students, and college students like to party. I used to live around there and I would encounter super wasted and loud students all the time. I didn’t live near a party house, but I’ve heard that the bass from the loud music is a particular problem. Also, if you can’t hear, you have no idea how loud you’re being.

        • Also, if you don’t hear, you have to feel your music. That means cranking up the bass and having your neighbors feel it along with you.

          • Yeah, I noticed this at the Gallaudet stage/dance party at the H Street Fest.
            Their DJ had massive subwoofers and they were just blasting lots of Miami bass, hiphop, and dubstep with super low ends. I don’t even think they had midrange speakers or tweeters. Cool stuff.
            Back in the early 00s, I partied a lot at a dance club called Twilo in NYC. Every Sunday morning, there was an older blind man who would show up at 6am (after the crowd thinned out) and would dance in open spaces on the dance floor in front of the subwoofer boxes. House music was really the only type of music he could dance to, as he needed the loud club atmosphere with deep low ends to properly feel the music. Really inspiring.

          • Anon 11:28, I love this story. And your Twilo reference is really bringing me back!

          • Ha, were you a Twilo regular as well, Shawess? 😉
            I was a regular for the last two years it was open while I was an NYU freshman :p

          • I wasn’t a regular, no, but had a bunch of friends who were. One of my friends at the time designed a bunch of fliers for events there, back when people could make a living in New York designing party fliers. I was just telling someone about how this friend paid $600/month, circa 1997, to share a floor of a Chelsea warehouse with his three work colleagues and it blew my mind (again).

            Speaking of NYC 2000s party nostalgia, did you ever go to the Music in the Anchorage events in the base of the Brooklyn Bridge? I still think those are some of the best music/club events I could ever imagine.

          • Oh awesome! I still probably have some of their flyers in a box in my closet. I have friends in NYC who still have 200+ Twilo flyers and posters in their closet. I miss the pre-internet party flyers; many of them were true works of art 🙁
            Yes, I did go to The Anchorage. Very cool, art’y parties in the foot of the bridge. I was just in NY two weeks ago and went to the DUMBO Arts Fest on that Friday night. They know have a beer stand down in the foot along with lots of tables for people watching. Lots of strollers too! 😉
            Did you ever go to the Lunatarium in DUMBO? Or the roving Blackkat or Rubulad parties?

          • Yes — those fliers are pretty amazing! I can’t imagine seeing them now. It feels like that was another lifetime ago! I’m afraid I didn’t go to those other parties though. I was less a club kid and more into the arts events.

            Btw I think I might know you in real life … connecting dots here. Does your Facebook profile have two letters instead of your last name? And did your gf recently move for grad school?

      • Also, with respect to parties, a friend of mine in college was legally deaf, but could hear a little. He loved music, and as he continued to lose his hearing, wanted to keep that in his life. If he turned up the bass really loud, he could still feel the music and it was comforting to him. But that could be really annoying to hearing neighbors.

  • Formerly Broken Jaw

    Rant: I had to issue an Excessive Sparkle Brony citation on Metro last night.
    Rave: I finally got a good night’s sleep!
    Rant: Alcohol was involved and I’m trying to get away from that as a sleep supplement.

  • Emmaleigh504

    Rant: Competition. I hate competition. This is why I don’t play team sports people!
    Rave: I’ve decided I figured out the crusher and the crushee. Shhhh I’m right, you can’t dissuade me. Don’t worry anon you secret is safe with me.
    Rave: just woke up and I’m enjoying some fabulous cafe au lait made with REAL coffee.

  • Rave: Hospital bill ended up only being $150.
    Rant: Recent doctor’s appointment cost $90. This is after paying a $30 copay upfront. I really don’t understand how this works. I have a feeling that if I call my insurance company to complain they’ll say my policy says I also have a deductible or something. This the first time I’ve been charged (beyond the copay) for an office visit and this visit was before the policy changed (on Oct. 1)

    • Emmaleigh504

      I have never understood how my insurance works. If I expect to pay money, I don’t have to. If I don’t expect to, I have to. And now to make matters worse, there’s no set co-pay, but an agreement between the insurance company and individual doctors. I’m sure me and the doctors are both getting screwed.

    • Probably co-insurance. That means that after you finish paying your deductible (say, $1000), you still have to pay 10 or 20% of your medical costs until you reach the out-of-pocket maximum for the year (say, $2500).
      Health insurance doesn’t guarantee you cost-free healthcare. It just protects you from bankruptcy.
      What I’ve never understood, and perhaps someone here can explain it, is why when I go to the doctor and the bill is $500, I ONLY pay a portion of that even though I haven’t met my deductible yet.

      • “Health insurance doesn’t guarantee you cost-free healthcare. It just protects you from bankruptcy.”
        Not even that. There was a really interesting article in the New York Times a while back about people _with health insurance_ who had still gone broke from healthcare expenses. That was really eye-opening to me; I’d always thought that that was a predicament you’d be in only if you _didn’t_ have health insurance.

        • Is that pre-ACA? I’d guess so since I think a part of it was making it possible for people not to be cut off for lots of treatments think cancer and the like. I think a good plan can keep the costs low.

      • The bill is $500 but you have a co-payment of ____. Your insurance pays the balance (which is less than $500, it is whatever the insurance has negotiated). Your co-pay goes towards the deductible. Once you reach the deductible, you don’t have to pay anything, not even the co-pay (for the remainder of the year).

    • I’d recommend reading over your policy. One forgettable part of ACA is that insurance companies have to explain your coverage in plain language. My insurance is very good, so I don’t recall paying so much except for a MRI which was $75, but insurance negotiate reductions on tests, etc, then you owe the difference up to a certain point. I’m lucky that I only have a $300 deductible (pre-ACA) plan, so I reach that level pretty quickly.

  • Rave/Rant: My grad school started a student government this week. YAY! We desperately need one. Got sucked into writing a grant proposal in 5 days, though. I’m a little nervous – I don’t have much grant writing experience. Also don’t know if I can maintain a leadership status – I’m working at a new job full time on top of taking classes…
    Rave: Drink plans with a good friend tonight – I haven’t seen her in a while and definitely have a lot to catch her up on!

  • Bear

    Rant: Work. Per usual. I’m sick of stressing about it and I’m sure my loved ones are sick of hearing about it. Planning to tell my VP that I will give him another 6 months but if things don’t improve by then I’m moving on. He needs to either find someone who will properly manage the team and take that burden off me or give me the title and salary that goes along with those responsibilities since I’m already performing them. I have to put an end point on this or I will lose my mind.
    Rave: Time to buy a new laptop, and I think I’m switching to Mac. Photographers out there, how does Aperture rate against Photoshop? I’ve never used it. And has anyone been using the new Photoshop monthly plan? I find it a little strange. I guess I like knowing that I own the software…but on the flip side I’m not sure I could afford to buy it.

    • You should have that conversation, but treat it as a negotiation, not a complaint. Go in with your job description and a list of everything you’re doing that’s not on it. Request the promotion and raise. If he balks, offer your alternative, that he hire someone to share your load. If you’re doing well at your job, and his IQ is above room temperature, you should get it. No manager likes to go through a hiring and re-training process if they can avoid it.

    • I use Aperture – but I’m slowly coming to terms that I bought a cheaper, likely inferior product with a pain in the ass file system.

    • I know nothing about photography, but a friend who is a good photographer mentioned that Apple unfortunately stopped support for Aperture a month or two ago.

      • sort of – Aperture is transitioning to the Photos app. Lightroom is more of the Aperture equivalent, I think, rather than PS. Though I’m no expert. Maybe Pablo can chime in?

    • pablo .raw

      I use and like Aperture but it has been discontinued. My understanding is that the new photo program that will come with new computers will be very good but who knows.
      Aperture and Photoshop are two different things, Aperture is a file system with some editing capabilities. But is nothing compared to Photoshop. You are probably talking about lightroom.

  • Jeweler e-mailed me a pic of the ring I’m giving my girlfriend. Nervous, anxious…but it’s a good nervous and anxiousness. Two years ago I didn’t picture myself getting married, but here I am. I’m extremely happy and blessed to have her in my life. Can’t wait to get hitched!

  • Rave: Dinner at Chez Billy. Every single thing we ordered (two apps, two mains, two desserts) was perfect. If I had to say something negative, it would be that they should improve their wine experience. I don’t mean just better wines. I mean better priced wines. If you’re charging $25 for an entree, you can afford to narrow the margin on the wine. I KNOW what a bottle of Louis Jadot is worth, and it ain’t $40. And that’s pretty much the cheapest bottle they have. Overpaying for a mediocre supermarket wine diminishes the experience. Still a rave though.

    • justinbc

      Jadot makes dozens of different bottlings, many of which are world class wines.. Maybe the one they’re selling is a good bit better than what you’re buying at the grocery store?

      • Just give someone the benefit of the doubt, for once. The constant attempts at one-upsmanship are insulting and tiresome.

  • houseintherear

    Ok Popville… my WHS foster kitten Mindy has been adopted, and her bro Mork is still looking for his family. He is a super cuddly, people-oriented kitten, and a total lap cat already. He’s playful and adorable. Perfect with the litter box, and with sharing food with other cats. He really loves playing with the resident dog, and chasing toys, and… everything. He just seems to be happy about everything in general. I almost decided to keep him but my cat had emergency health issues last week and needs a peaceful home and personal space for the immediate future.
    If you’ve been looking for a kitten to add to your house, check him out here: (the pics don’t do him justice…) http://www.petango.com/webservices/adoptablesearch/wsAdoptableAnimalDetails.aspx?id=23879519&css=https://secure3.convio.net/whsdc/assets/css/pettango.css&PopUp=true

  • Rant: Also completely bummed about Young House Love. How will I procrastinate at work?!?!?

    Extra Rant: Stress-induced eye twitch is back with a vengeance.

    Rave: Feeling like we might tackle a long awaited house project this weekend – ripping out crappy laminate, tiling, and re-installing cabinets here we come!

    • Rave/rant: Found a condo I love, but it’s farther out than I would prefer. I think I’m still going for it.
      Rant: Having access to the internet on my computer (new for me) is so distracting.
      Rave: Popville keeps me entertained throughout the day.
      Rant: Dating in DC made especially difficult by my comment from yesterday (re: who makes the first move) and my general shyness when outside of my comfort zone. Trying to just live and let someone great cross my path.

      • Dating in DC is a pain, and online dating does not make it any easier. Have you seen the online series The Single Life by Glamour mag? This was pretty much my last week. http://youtu.be/_lBEG7afB_w?list=PL1TPHg7HzcUpQGveOF8v-etxsFq4fiLiS

      • As a shy dude, I’ve pretty much given up on dating. I struggle to make conversation with strangers, especially ones I’m trying to impress, and being passive and afraid of rejection I’m way too terrified to make the first move.

        • Accountering

          Don’t give up. Keep working on your self confidence – that is tough though, good luck! Rejection is just another opportunity to talk to someone else.

        • Something someone said to me about rejection awhile back really resonated: If you get rejected, what’s the worst thing that happens as a result. The answer is usually “nothing” or “my feelings get hurt” but if you don’t take the risk, you’ll never know. Maybe if there’s someone you’re on the fence about then bring that to the front of your mind next time. I know this is easier said than done. I’m lucky…rejection is a little easier for me than most people. I always just assume it’s as much about what the other person isn’t saying as it is about me (or, hopefully, more)! Get out there!!!

        • The worst thing that can happen as a result is that you can drink way too much and end up in the all-night (now long gone) restaurant in the Howard Johnson’s across from the Watergate singing “Dead Flowers” in your best Mich Jagger goes to Nashville accent way too loud until your roommates drag you out and you wake up the next morning dry-heaving and practically sobbing until someone gives you three Tylenols and a beer, and you feel like an asexual loser for having been shot down so completely and an idiot for having acted like an idiot. And then, for the rest of your life, whenever you hear the name “Chloe,” you smile ruefully and blush just the tiniest bit and sing “I’ll be in my basement room/with a needle, and a spoon/and another girl will take my pain away” to yourself.
          But, you know, you do live.

        • I have a few girl friends who like shy guys and are on online dating sites specifically to meet the shy guys that won’t approach them IRL. Maybe you could start there?

          • Wat?
            Are there specifically online dating sites for shy guys (and the women who love them)?

          • The OP Anon: Haha, sorry. I meant they’re on online dating sites (like OKC and Match) because they think they’re more likely to find the shy guys (which they love) on there than out at a bar or through friends.

          • SparklyKitty, I think we’ve hit upon a million dollar:
            Dating for Shy Folks
            Reddit is a big place, we’d have a lot customers. 🙂

      • Online dating made it easier in some ways because I occasionally work a lot or late hours, so going out to events isn’t possible. I’ve gotten plenty of awesome matches in….[fill in far away state]. My issue is primarily lots of people are just there to browse with no intention of meeting. As far as shyness, I need to become more confident especially in hetero-spaces. I have yet to approach someone I like in space that isn’t LGBT. I’ve had a girl go off on me for presuming she may be gay…it sucked. On the other hand just meeting people out and about a lot of gay folks only have straight friends, so they’ll never find a reason to go any gay events except for Pride. I need to work less and go out more, and I’m working on both those things.
        Shy Anon: You can always practice on your friends to work out some your kinks. In your case, online dating may be a good option to alleviate some of the stress. Also get yourself an awesome wing(wo)man; he/she can break the ice for you.

        • Work out kinks with friends. IDK but that made me laugh. My mind is in the gutter. And second the part about people being on online dating sites and not really wanting to meet. I was one of those “just browsing” people too, but then, I found someone who pushed me to me offline. FYI, I’m SUPER shy and not that confident, and online dating has definitely helped me open up more and be more confident.

    • Emmaleigh504

      “How will I procrastinate at work?!?!?”
      I thought that’s why we are all here!

  • topscallop

    Can anyone recommend a good seafood restaurant in DC that won’t break the bank? I don’t care for oysters and would prefer to stay metro-accessible (i.e., not Georgetown). Thanks!

    Rave: this weather, and a 3-day weekend coming up
    Rant: feeling unmotivated at work
    Rave: seeing and feeling good results from my fitness routine of the past couple months

  • RAVE: Ooooh I forgot – wonderful dinner at Maple last weekend. Sat down immediately at 9pm without a reservation on a Saturday night, really nice ambiance, food was awesome, and prices are really affordable (especially compared to the money grab on 14th Street). Great spot for a date.
    RANT: My dinner companion annoyed the hell out of me. Would rather have ate by myself. She was loud, obnoxious, and embarrassing.
    RAVE: Really good workout last night led to a healthy dinner and a full 7 (!!!) hours of sleep. I feel great.
    RANT: so much work through the end of the month. 🙁
    RAVE: Flying to Los Angeles tomorrow and will be there for 5 days. Surfing, family, friends, In-N-Out burgers, donuts, real Mexican food – yay! 😀

  • Rave: The city doesn’t feel so transient as it did when I first moved here. More people are settling down, having families (fur or human babies), and sticking around! I like it!

    • I lucked out, too– never really felt the transience. Most of the people I fell in with when I arrived 10 years ago are still here, mostly with kids in local schools. My experience makes me a little unsympathetic to the people who complain about how hard it is to make/ keep friends here.

    • skj84

      I’ve been here for almost a decade and have mostly the same friend group from the time I came here. However this year I had at least 5 friends leave the area for various reasons. Another is moving next week. It’s still setting in that they are moved and not just out of state temporary.

    • I found by the end of my 20s most of us who stayed here have committed to staying here for life (or at least for a pretty long time.) But agree with Anon at 11:49, in my core group of friends most of us have been here for 15+ years.

    • I’m in my late 30 and moved here about 10 years ago. About 2 years ago all of my friends moved. All of them. I’m shy and introverted, so it has been incredibly hard to make new friends, especially since my job now is much more time consuming than the one I was in when I moved here and made my friends. I think different people just have different experiences. It also doesn’t help that the things I like to do when I do go out (go to the Kennedy Center for concerts, go to plays, etc) aren’t things where you really meet people.

      • The fact that all of you long-term people are sticking around actually makes it harder for us newcomers to make friends! People who’ve been here for 10+ years with a long-established network of friends are a lot less open to making new friends b/c they have their social life set up. It’s not as easy now to make friends as it was 15 years ago (when I lived here for a year or so). Some of that is my own age, of course, but it definitely feels like different dynamics and much more one-sided (me always trying to bust into a circle of friends, rather than being invited in).

        • Sorry, my reply went to the wrong Anonymous.
          I do totally relate to Anon 1:03’s issues, though – I also have a hard time making friends in general, and specifically at the things I tend to do (like go to the Kennedy Ctr – sounds like we would be friends if we could muster up the gumption to introduce ourselves!!).

        • I’m with you two. I moved here in my early 30s and have been here for five years. I have some good friends now, but it’s definitely taken more time than in the past and I need to make more of an effort to “put myself out there.” But when I do, I’m usually glad I did.

        • This is true (about it being hard to break in to an established crowd). Here’s how I see it. If you come for college or your first job post-college, you’re going to lose a lot of your friends, as they will move for jobs and family. And that is true anywhere. If you come in your late 20s, you have a good chance of meeting a cohort that has already done the moving for jobs and families and is settling down. If you arrive mid-30s or later, your peers will be settled with friends and probably busy with kids. Again, this will be true almost anywhere you go. Moral of the story, your own decisions matter as much as than the place itself.

          • I’m not sure what to make of this “moral of the story.” It sounds a bit snarky and judgmental, frankly, and not very respectful of people who have different life trajectories. Is the suggestion to not move in your 30s because doing so will make it very hard to meet friends? Because if so, that ship has sailed for some of us.
            Yes, decisions matter, but some decisions trump others, and in some cases, making friends easily is not the number 1 priority.

          • I don’t know why you’re getting your back up. It seems pretty unobjectionable to say that the decisions you make affect various aspects of your life differently. All this person is saying is that DC is no different than other places. I see no disrespect, no judgment, just an observation.

    • I’m pretty sure that I read a study a while back that says DC is no more transient than any other city. The reputation has stuck though.

  • Rant: My office is being reorganized. I will no longer be reporting to my current boss — someone I like and work well with — but instead to someone who’s at the same grade level I am and whom I’ve always found rather, well, bossy.
    I guess I’ll have to see how it all plays out, but I should probably start looking through the job listings and get some applications in the pipeline, just in case.

    • Anyone have any advice on dealing with bossy bosses, and/or on reporting to someone who is a peer?

      • Emmaleigh504

        All my previous peer bosses were cool and not bossy. They also didn’t review my daily work, they were just the link to the big bosses and there to do annual reviews. It was pretty easy. Now I’m the peer boss. Mostly, I just want to be updated on every little thing, b/c that’s what my micro manager boss wants. It’s a pain for all of us underlings. So keep your new person informed and maybe they will leave you alone?

        • Maybe. I guess I’m apprehensive because this person has always struck me as bossy and super-ambitious — and as someone who does a lot of tooting their own horn — and it’s rubbed me the wrong way even as a peer. And now I’m going to be reporting to this person.
          On the other hand, maybe being elevated to an actual boss position will make this person feel more secure and act less bossy as a result?

          • Emmaleigh504

            Ugh my least favorite kind of coworker. Hopefully they will feel more secure and chill out.

          • Formerly Broken Jaw

            On the other hand, maybe being elevated to an actual boss position will make this person feel more secure and act less bossy as a result?

            This has been my experience.

          • “On the other hand, maybe being elevated to an actual boss position will make this person feel more secure and act less bossy as a result?”
            Keep dreaming. No way. If anything, the promotion just validates their bossy ways and they get worse. “I’m obviously doing the right things – I keep on the same path and strive to do better!”
            Since it’s re-org time, is there any chance you can move with your boss? Have you vocalized that you want to follow your boss? They might not even know what you want. Squeaky wheel gets the oil, etc…

          • When the office leadership sought input beforehand, I specifically said that I wanted to stay with my boss and offered reasons why I thought he was a good fit to continue overseeing my job function. Oh well. At least I tried…

          • That sucks textdoc. I hope it turns out better than it sounds.

  • epric002

    rant: the puppy grossness is still here. was up at 1:00, but not soon enough to prevent an accident, and then again at 5:00. i am so over this.
    rant: the bitchy old woman on shepherd who has nothing better to do than sit on her porch and wait for me to (occasionally) walk down “her” side of the street with my dogs so that she can yell at me if they dare lift a leg near “her” treebox. believe me lady, i prefer to stay far away from you and “your” treebox, but sometimes it’s unavoidable. i have tried to be polite and friendly, but i have nothing polite left in me. i am mustering every bit of everything to not tell her to go eff herself.
    rant: again, too many rants.

    • Ugh. Have you talked to your vet about trying Pepto Bismol? I didn’t know you could give it to dogs but my vet suggested it when my dog got sick over the weekend and I couldn’t bring him in.

      • epric002

        he took his last dose of panacur last night, and if this hasn’t cleared up by fri they want me to bring him back in so they can prescribe an anti-diarrheal. i’ll ask about the pepto too- i also didn’t know you could give them that. (though- HOW exactly did you get your dog to take it???) other than needing to go out much more frequently, and the quality of the stools, you wouldn’t even know anything is wrong. he is the same boisterous, happy, playful guy he’s always been. so frustrating!!!!

        • That sounds exactly like what has been going on with my guy too. His appetite and energy level is great but the grossness is just continuous when he’s on dog food. Giving him the pepto was quite the process. He’s little so I put him on the kitchen counter in front of me and pretty much threw the spoonful down his throat. He had a pink mustache the first day…

          • epric002

            i know exactly how frustrating that is! my mom had a recipe for homemade dogfood that i may have to try for a while- then at least i’ll know EXACTLY what he’s eating and hopefully be able to pinpoint what the allergy/sensitivity is. i may end up covered in pepto if i try to force some down his throat- he is a squirmy 11mo 50ish pound pit puppy- he is a handful! good luck to you!

  • Rave/Rant: Gorgeous picture – at first I thought it was Greenwich in London – which made me really miss living in London. But – it’s DC and I get to live in this gorgeous city now, so that’s something.

    Rant: Trying to put up healthy boundaries with my family in terms of how often I can visit and arrange my weekends around events, holidays, etc. It’s to the point where this Fall I’ll rarely be home for weekends and that’s not the life I want to live. BUT it’s so hard as I feel like I’m being selfish…

    Rave: Awesome weather last night, rode a cool new horse, had a semi-productive day at the career fair, and meeting for lunch with my old supervisor/mentor today.

  • Do you think 45 minutes is enough time to drive from the Brookland metro to the Montgomery Mall, at 3pm? (I drive so little, I have no concept of how long things take.)

  • Formerly Broken Jaw

    Bonus Rant: I saw on my cell that my father’s wife had called last night. She only calls me on the rare occasions he has an issue and I’m totally fine with that.
    Bonus Rave #2: She wanted to thank me for the flowers she received on her birthdayy.
    Bonus Rave #3: A wonderful sister who sends flowers and include your name on the card!
    Bonus Rant #2: She wanted to know the dates when I am visting in November so “we can plan something.” The only thing I plan on doing is reviewing the pre-nup and the lastest version of the will.

    • Formerly Broken Jaw


    • Accountering

      I see your Bonus Rant2 as somewhat of a rave? You have this trip scheduled out and sounds like it will be productive! If she is worth her salt and is truly into your father, there will be no issues with the pre-nup and will. She should be more than willing to protect you.
      If the above is true, is there a reason you are so anti-this woman? If she makes your father happy (presumably she does) and isn’t after his money (if the above is true, than this seems true) than perhaps you should try and give her a chance? Just my .02c

      • Formerly Broken Jaw

        I was kidding just a wee bit about reviewing the pre-nup and will. As I have told my dad several times what he does with his money is not my business. She is not who I would have picked out for him (he married the lady across the street which I just think was lazy*) but she is good to him and good for him and most likely has extended his life a few years since she keeps him hopping spo I’m not anti-her. She just talks about the money and the price of everything all the time which drives me crazy.

        *My grandfather did the same thing so I guess it runs in the family.

        • Emmaleigh504


        • After my wife died I started seeing someone because I already had her number on the cell phone and we both had Zone 1 parking stickers and could park in each other’s neighborhoods. It’s not lazy, it’s practical!

    • I feel you on the step parents. My step mom is obnoxiously more needy than my actual mom… I don’t understand it. She gets upset if I don’t call and see her and my dad regularly and is super overbearing on Facebook as well.

  • Accountering

    Super Rant: Sounds like our bonuses are going to be capped at the total amount we got last year, despite our pre tax income likely being about 10% higher than last year (because we aren’t going to hit our goal)
    Super Rant2: The reason we aren’t going to hit our goal is the $500,000+ we lost on the conference, when we were expecting it to break even.
    Small Rave: As a new manager, I will be eligible for a larger bonus than last year, and boss will fight for me to get it, but all my colleagues are basically going to be flat or even down a tiny bit. Stupid conference.

    • I’m still so pissed about that conference thing and I don’t even know you! Incompetence like that just makes me so mad.

      • Me too! My organization runs a few huge conferences a year and I can’t imagine anyone getting away with that kind of incompetence.

        • My company used to run a huge conference every year and it lost hundreds of thousands of dollars. This tear we took the $72k loss to cancel the hotel blocking and considered it a huge win. So, I totally get this, but ours was a science based “mandate” from the top. Your meeting planner going rogue and ruining it for everyone else just sucks.

        • And it’s getting taken out on everybody, not just the ones who messed up.

    • Accountering

      The call between division VP, our CEO, meeting planner, and our CFO is today at 2:30. We will get to the bottom of this I am sure. I will keep everyone updated. My understanding at this point is that the meeting planner was certainly spending too much, but also that she was getting the OK from our CEO as we wanted to conference to be nice and high end. The part about getting it taken out on everyone is very true. Bonuses are based on a % of pre-tax income, so a $500,000 hit to pre-tax is a direct hit to bonus. At a small company (less than 100 employees) that can be significant for everyone.

    • What’s a bonus?

      • +10000.
        Not only do I barely get bonuses, I haven’t gotten a raise in 3 years, not even a cost of living one (not a Fed either). And, over the course of these 3 years, I lost a holiday, got shittier healthcare, lost other benefits. I am essentially paid about 10% less.
        So, excuse me for not feeling sorry for you and your same amount of bonus as last year.

      • Heh, I had a similar reaction. 😉

  • Rant: My apartment is usually neat yet I am only capable of keeping my desk at work organized for 3 minutes at a time before the clutter takes over.
    Rave: Finished the final text for an annual report I’ve been working on for the last couple of months. On to graphic design!
    Rant: One of my best friends is the worst texter/caller/emailer I have ever met. It is getting hard to make plans with her because she takes days to respond, even if she initiated the invite. We always have a great time together… when we eventually get together. Not sure if there’s anything I can say to improve the communication issue.
    Rant: Likely will be covering a colleague on work travel during the next PoP HH. This one sounds like it will be really great!

  • Please help me. Or if you can’t, then make me laugh with snark. For the first time in a good while, I’m stymied in a (semi)professional setting.
    We have a new boss. He’s the top dog, and I guess he thinks that means marking his territory. Literally. He sprinkles all around the seat (even on the floor!) of our one shared bathroom (small office). He is the only man to do this. I didn’t even know this was a thing with modern civilized men until he arrived.
    I’m #3 in the organization; #2 is in a satellite office on the west coast. #2 and I are both women. Whose job is it to tell the new boss that he needs to be more considerate of shared space?
    It’s unreasonable to expect us to put up with this, right? Would I be a spoiled brat to bring this up, or to ask #2 to address it with him? If I have to bring it up, HOW??? The very idea of telling the top executive in my company to pee cleaner is awful. I would almost rather live with the frat boy bathroom than have that conversation. But I have a staff to take care of.

    • Can you put a sign up in the bathroom (on the wall, not the door!) reminding men to lift the seat when they go?

      • Emmaleigh504

        put the sign on the wall behind the toilet where men will see and in front where women can see while they do their business.

    • epric002

      put a sign up so that it’s not (obviously) directed at him? i feel ya- i used to work with a generally awful woman who also did that. so gross.

    • I think that this is when you put up a note reminding everyone to be considerate in using a shared space – either leaving it open or listing several areas of concern. If that doesn’t work, maybe try ordering some of those pissing targets from Amazon……. Seriously: yuck. This is worse to me than yesterday’s peeing outside posts.

    • Passive-aggressive sign on the wall FTW.

    • skj84

      Agreed with a sign on the door. That way no fingers are pointed. Of course he may ignore it. But it’s a start.

      • If a sign doesn’t work, my next step would be to mention it at a general meeting. Like, “Just a reminder that we all share the bathroom. Men, please lift the seat. Everyone, please wipe the seat when you leave.” But honestly, my real reaction would be to just say, “Dude, seriously, lift the seat please,” when walking past him after a transgression.

        • It sounds like it’s not just a seat-related issue, though — the OP mentioned that the floor was getting hit too.

          • That is gross. But since people are presumably wearing shoes at the office, I might not try to fight that battle.

        • I don’t know…my boss does this with everything all the time because she’s scared to cause conflict or give even neutral let alone negative feedback…but usually we all know who this is directed at. Some examples: Don’t cut your nails, don’t wear jeans to work, pay attention to your arrival time and if you’re late put in for leave, make sure you update your project summary sheets. The whole staff knows who is guilty of each of these…it’s sort of awkward.

    • we have this problem in the women’s room. I don’t get it. sometimes i go in to the 5 stall bathroom and there is only 1 stall (maybe 2) that doesn’t have urine, feces (?!?!?) or one of those seat covers on it. Seriously people, we work in community, please clean up after yourselves.

      • Where I work too! Except you forgot to mention the blood. I find myself sometimes walking 5 minutes to a public bathroom, which tells you something.

      • We have a serial leave-wadded-up-toilet-paper-on-the-toilet-seat offender. She has done this several dozens of times (no exaggeration… I’ve lost count) over the last year and no one has ever caught her in the act. I’m fairly certain the same person was responsible for two different bloodied toilet seats (in a three stall bathroom) on the same day and leaving one toilet completely draped in TP a la Christo.
        It drives me insane!

        • I had to LOL at “leaving one toilet completely draped in TP a la Christo.” (Though I fear the effect was less artistic than it sounds.)

      • ^ omg this. my work too, what is going on? there are some weeks where i have seen entirely too many of other people’s poops.

    • My grandma had a sign in the bathroom, “If you sprinkle when you tinkle, please be neat and wipe the seat.” Maybe that will work?

    • Accountering

      Is this guy peeing on the seat and floor? What the hell is wrong with him? Perhaps suggest he see a doctor? It just isn’t THAT hard…

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