Random Reader Rant and/or Revel

Photo by PoPville flickr user washingtonydc

You can talk about whatever is on your mind – quality of life issues, a beautiful tree you spotted, scuttlebutt, or any random questions/thoughts you may have. But please no personal attacks and no need to correct people’s grammar. This is a place to vent and/or celebrate things about daily life in DC.

187 Comment

  • Cautious rave: I’ve finally rented out my old place!!
    I won’t be entirely at ease until the lease is signed and I’ve got the check for the security deposit and first month’s rent, but things are moving along — the prospective tenants (a couple) have each gone through the credit-check process and will be sending me their applications shortly.
    Very pleased!

  • Rave: Lovely weekend! Beautiful weather, Sunday morning was spent getting breakfast at the diner and then walking through the zoo, made a brisket and an apple cake to prepare for the holiday. So excited for yummy food! And glad to be back after an extended visit to my father in law in Seattle. Jet lag hit our house hard but I think we’re mostly recovered now πŸ™‚

    • For a moment I read that as “made a brisket and apple cake” and was thinking, “Well, I’ve heard about mixing sweet and savory, but…” πŸ˜‰

      • Lol, I originally didn’t have an “an” in there, and I realized it would be easy to misread. Apparently it’s still easy to misread! Oops. Either way, I’m really looking forward to dinner on Wednesday πŸ™‚

        • It’s not really misreadable — I had a split-second “Huh??”, but the “an” totally resolved the situation. Wise choice of article. πŸ™‚

  • Rave: Made a fitting appointment at Coup de Foudre. Thanks, bra-vangelists!
    Rant: Double booked on Thursday. I need to be better about organizing my calendar.

    • Actual LOL at “bra-vangelists.” πŸ™‚
      What did you double-book for — the PoPville unofficial happy hour (Thurs. 9/25, Jack Rose, Adams Morgan) and something else? Or two things, neither of which is the PoPville unofficial happy hour?

      • The PoPville happy hour and another happy hour with friends. I’m currently trying to figure out a way to do both!

        • Emmaleigh504

          You can do both! I have faith in you! I did 2 happy hours the day of the first unofficial Popville HH and lived to happy another hour.

          • Accountering

            I double booked the Partisan HH. Had a date later that night. Date was interesting, and the fact that I showed up after POPVille HH (and a few beers) definitely made it better. We both realized very quickly on that it wasn’t going to work out, but had a couple of strong beers anyways. BOGO at Lou’s – had to take advantage of that!

          • I just remembered I live 3 blocks from Jack Rose so I really have no excuse not to do both. πŸ™‚

          • Emmaleigh504

            See! It was meant to be!

      • skj84

        Double booked as well. I’m probably starting with the my friends Bday party then heading to PoPville. The PoPville Happy Hours have a tendency to go late as it is. Can’t wait to see everyone!

    • Ooh! Enjoy your bra fitting!

    • epric002

      congratulations and enjoy! if it’s miraculous, please join the bra-vangelism movement. there are so many women out there who haven’t heard the good word yet πŸ˜‰

    • While I enjoyed my fitting at Coup de Foudre, I’ve found that Trousseau in Vienna is SO much better. If you have a way to get out there, I highly recommend it. They have so much more stock than Coup de Foudre and they’re really nice there.

      • i was disappointed with coup de foudre. the women working there were *really* nice, but they had nothing in my size. it seems that most of these places cater to women more well endowed than me, and but us smaller ladies (36AA) sometimes want something other than a training bra!

        • epric002

          y’all must have missed our very extensive bra convo on friday πŸ™‚ coup de foudre knows what they’re doing size-wise, but has a very small selection in stock. for large selection in stock- trousseau or sylene’s are the places to go! also- trousseau will order items for you if they don’t have your size, AND will do alterations. i haven’t been to sylene’s yet so i don’t know if they do the same.
          anon @11:22- have you ever tried the little bra company?

          • Yes, I did miss it! Glad Trousseau is getting the credit it deserves – now if only they’d move out of that terrible strip mall.

      • Agreed — Coup de Foudre’s selection is definitely small. But there’s no harm getting a fitting there and taking your business elsewhere if they don’t stock anything in your size. It’s the most centrally located of the high-end DC lingerie shops, so it’s worth a shot unless going to Trousseau or (my favorite) Sylene is more convenient.

  • Rave: great weekend, great spin class, farmers market, wedding, etc.
    Rave: the whole wedding processed from the Spanish Steps to Hillyer Art Space, lead by a clarinetist and accordion player. I never knew I needed that in my someday wedding, but now I’ve decided I do.
    Rant/Rave: brewing yesterday was a bear, with CO scares, a broken thermometer, and finally a broken air lock gasket, but my place smells amazing, a friend hooked me up last minute with an extra fermenter lid, and I saw some bubbles this morning, so it might all work out.

  • Rant: Had to ask a parent to keep their kid back from the edge of the metro platform last night. They had told the girl to step back a few times, but the girl kept sneaking closer and peaking over the edge or trying to see the train AS IT WAS COMING (lights were flashing and you could hear it). She was on the grey granite edge. I finally turned to the parents after someone else made a comment about it and told them if they wouldn’t hold their kid back, I would because I didn’t want to see her get hit by the train. I know it’s not my place (I have no kids), but I didn’t want to see that little girl get hurt. What is wrong with parents? And why do I feel so shitty that I spoke up about it? They totally glared and were about to start yelling at me.

    • I think you did the right thing. The parents were just probably embarrassed and getting angry was their knee jerk reaction.

    • F em’ you did the right thing.

    • I’ve had a dream a couple of times where a kid is running on the platform, slips and falls onto the tracks and gets electrocuted the third rail. Freaky Deaky!

    • I had a similar thing happen – I was driving this weekend and came to a busy stop sign and was trying to turn right and decided it would be nice to wait for the woman and her baby (in a stroller) who were about to cross. Problem was, she was saying goodbye to a friend, and took her time, and then stopped IN THE MIDDLE OF THE INTERSECTION, turned around, and started talking to her friend again. Meanwhile, there were at least 3 cars waiting for her to move. I gave my horn a short toot to remind her that folks were waiting, and she not only flipped me off, she then gave me a nazi salute and goose-stepped across the rest of the intersection.
      I honestly think she was just not thinking and was embarrassed, and lashed out defensively. But I was still so flabbergasted and annoyed. I wasn’t being aggressive, I didn’t swear, I tried to be patient, but who just hangs out with their baby in the middle of the intersection?

    • GiantSquid

      Better to have them pissed at you than have a hurt or dead kid.

    • You did the right thing, although maybe you could have phrased it to the parents better. Their reaction was probably to the way you said it.
      I had something similar happen to me a while ago. I was standing by the edge of a river that I knew was closed for swimming due to a sewage overflow. Some parents apparently did not know this, as their kids were paddling around and getting the water in their mouths, like kids do. I told the parents they might want to get their kids out of the water because it could make them really sick, but they got defensive. I’d like to think in retrospect they appreciated the warning, but were just caught off guard by someone telling them that they’d put their children in danger unknowingly.

  • Rant: Decided not to ride the Seagull Century this Saturday. I think I’m up for it, but I’m getting some medical tests/procedures on Friday and I think I’ll need to recover for at least a day.

    Rave: Sold my membership (via craigslist) to another rider. I got less than I paid for it, but at least it wasn’t a total loss. And the guy I sold it to went on a nice ride with me and a friend. We did the Oxford Loop, which Easton and goes through Oxford and St. Michaels. And of the people who responded to my ad is a brewer for Dogfish Head. Pretty cool.

  • rave: awesome wedding weekend in richmond w/gf. despite the sling, decorum must be maintained and wore the suit.
    rave: ortho appt for tmr. really hope i dont need surgery.

  • Emmaleigh504

    Happy World Rhino Day!
    Rhino facts:
    *in 2000 6 rhinos were poached in South Africa, in 2013 it jumped to 1004. This year over 730 have been poached so far
    *Shotspotter is being used in a pilot program in Kruger park to locate and arrest poachers.
    *the last rhino census in Kruger counted between 8400 and 9600 white rhinos.They are relocating several hundred to safer locations.
    *White rhinos are my favorite rhinos.

  • Rave: Only 3 weeks until my due date! After this week is done, baby girl can come any time she pleases… although it would definitely please her mother if she chose to not be too late!
    Rant: Although I’m so, so grateful to be pregnant, and to have been healthy so far, I’m just so over all of this. I’m uncomfortable, bordering on in pain, especially while commuting. Thank God for telecommuting!

    I’ve also been having crazy parenting-related anxiety dreams lately, the first one was 2 nights ago when I dreamed that I left her in her crib alone while going out to run errands, only realizing what I had done when I was out. Last night I dreamed that I broke a baby’s arm while trying to pick him up. I really, really hope that I’m going to be a better parent in real life than I am in my dreams, because I’m about to call CPS on my dream-self.

    • Lol to calling CPS on your dream self. You’ll be fine; the dreams are a sign of just how careful and conscientious a parent you’re going to be!

    • In terms of dreams, just wait til that sweet baby girl makes you sleep deprived. Holy…hallucinations.

    • Emmaleigh504

      My sister was 2 months premature, I was a week late. My mother likes to complain that I was 2 months and a week late.
      Take it easy and congrats on the little one!

    • Oh yeah, baby anxiety. It doesn’t go away, you know. My kid is 7 (years!); just last week, I ran to catch a metro, slipped in through the closing doors, and had a sudden gut-drop feeling that I had left my child on the platform. Of course the kid was at school, but the nauseated “what have I done” feeling stuck with me for most of the ride.

  • Rant: Insomnia. You know it’s going to be a good day when you don’t get tired until 5AM. πŸ™
    Rave: Boss is out of the office, so it should be a fairly manageable day until I go home to crash.
    Rave: Fun weekend with an Oktoberfest event. Saw some friends, had some good beers and only got a mild hangover to show for it.

  • Rave: AMAZING day saturday with my host family from Japan. I met some of their previous students who live in the area as well and we had a big dinner in Chinatown and they even got to meet my boyfriend (who they knew a lot about through me haha). Anyway it was such a fun experience and translating back and forth so everyone was included in the conversation. I miss them so much already too.
    Rant: My new apartment has got this vinyl plank flooring which I know is to imitate dark wood but it’s so soft?? I’ve noticed a couple dents and scratches and it’s been exactly a week since I moved in. Neither me or my roommate wears shoes indoors (which would only make it worse I imagine), but it’s kind of worrying.
    Rant: still waiting to hear back for a job and my monday interview was rescheduled for thursday. suspense is a killer.
    Rave: honey crisp apples are still around

  • RANT: Was out this weekend and saw an Acquaintance’s boyfriend making out with someone else in a public setting. I have not seen Acquaintance in over a year, but I know her and Boyfriend live together. I went out that night with a Female Friend and she relayed to me that Acquaintance’s Boyfriend has hit on her multiple times this summer and even asked to have sex with her. He was very aggressive and lied when answering Female Friend’s questions about his relationship status (“I, uh, have an arrangement with my girlfriend….oh she doesn’t need to know….” etc). Female Friend told me that all her encounters with Boyfriend were very sketchy and shady, she has tried to steer clear of him.
    Acquaintance travels internationally a lot for work and probably has no idea that her Boyfriend is screwing around behind her back. I should probably tell her this information. But I also feel awkward about getting involved – it’s not my business.
    What would PoP’vill’agers do?

    • I know Carolyn Hax would probably tell you to stay out of it. However, I have a family member who found out her bf was cheating on her only through this method — an acquaintance saw him being publicly affectionate with another woman — so I personally might lean toward telling her. Key is that you have to do it in a way that makes sure you don’t get dragged in beyond conveying the initial information.

    • justinbc

      When it comes to speculation about what people are doing I generally stay out of it, but if you actually saw him physically doing something I would certainly let her know. She may deny that it’s happening out of convenience, but at least you did your part.

      • Yes, I saw him dancing with another woman, holding hands, and passionately kissing her. He appeared to be very much inebriated.
        I met him once a few years ago (that interaction was bad – he acted like an alpha-male jerk towards me simply because I was talking to his girlfriend), but I don’t think he remembered me or the fact that I’m an acquaintance of his girlfriend. He talked for a bit to my Female Friend at the party this weekend and she introduced me to him. That’s when I connected all the dots and Female Friend gave me the back-story on her interactions with him over the summer.

    • Accountering

      This is a tough one. If it is just an acquaintance, you certainly don’t have an obligation to involve yourself – with that said, I think it is probably the right thing to do. How does Hax feel about an anonymous e-mail or something along those lines?

      • This is exactly the crux of my dilemma – we are not good friends and haven’t seen one another in over a year. If this was a good friend, I’d have no hesitation in telling her. We are friends on Facebook, so I’ve seen all the photos of them together in my newsfeed and their travels. At least on FB, they have all appearances of being in a relationship.
        However, my other Female Friend relayed to me that boyfriend told her that his relationship is on the rocks and that they’ve been fighting a lot, however he’s still living with Acquaintance in her apartment. He’s moved in and out a few times over the summer. So this information would probably be valuable to Acquaintance as she makes her decision to dump this loser.

    • laduvet

      she has to know something – to some extent?

      If you are so concerned maybe meet her for coffee? I mean, I would want to know!

    • As someone who has been in your acquaintance’s position, I would also lean towards saying something. There’s always a chance that she’ll react badly and it’ll make things awkward between you two or you’ll get caught in the middle, but I know I appreciated someone bringing the shadiness to my attention when almost everyone knew about the cheating and no one said anything! The person who told me is now one of my closest friends (but I know this isn’t typical).

      • Ally

        Same here. Way back in 98, I moved here with my then-fiance and ended up becoming very good friends who a girl who had the guts to come up to me and tell me that my fiance had hit on her just the other night. I appreciated her keeping me from making an enormous mistake.

    • Tell her before she marries the dbag!!

    • Carolyn Hax tends to warn in this kind of situation that the friend whose partner has strayed will sometimes lash out at the bearer of bad news, sever their friendship, etc.
      Given that this is an acquaintance rather than a friend, would the worst-case scenario — severing your acquaintanceship — be that bad? It seems to me like there’s a lot to be gained (on the acquaintance’s part) by your telling her, and not all that much (on your part) to lose.
      If the guy has moved out/moved back in multiple times, then it sounds like the acquaintance already knows the relationship is on the rocks, but she may or may not know that he’s actively cheating on her. (Depending on how you define “cheating,” obviously, but still.)

      • Good points, Textdoc. We’re not close friends, so it’s not like I’d lose much if she lashed out at me. We don’t hang out all that often.
        She’s a very sweet and kind woman, hence why I’ve been thinking about this all weekend. If she was also a jerk (like him), I wouldn’t get involved. I can’t really imagine her lashing out at me; if anything, I think she would appreciate the info even if it made her upset.

    • skj84

      I think she has a right to know. Or maybe she does and just puts up with it. Telling her person does run the risk of her lashing out at you. But she can do what she wants with the information.

    • I would tell her. If it was in a public space, it’s worth saying something to her. I don’t know why that makes it feel different, but it really does. Although, it’s totally possible they could have an open relationship and they haven’t shared that information with you.

      The fact that it’s an acquaintance makes it easier. You don’t have any “skin” in the game, and she can’t accuse you of having a stake in breaking them up. Definitely do it.

    • Honestly, I would always say something. I don’t care if someone lashes out at me – I would still rather know that I told them. It’s putting their health at risk and if it gives them confirmation and makes them leave (or at least gives them awareness) then I think it’s worth it.

  • epric002

    rant: foster sitter canceled.
    rave: 2 new foster sitters volunteered, so now i have a back-up πŸ™‚
    rave: custom tailored strapless bra is amazing! AND i found another bra while i was there that is literally the most comfortable underwired bra i’ve ever worn. i am going to order it in every color, but i wish it came in more than black, nude, and hot pink (why is hot pink ALWAYS the 3rd color?!)
    rave: vegfest!
    rant: it was really hot so i left the foster puppy at home. very glad i did that.
    rave: yoga on sunday.
    rant: fabulous yoga instructor (who taught me a new way to do headstand and helped me with my crow) is leaving in a few weeks πŸ™

    • Lol, hot pink bras need to die. They don’t go well under any shirt unless the shirt is also HOT PINK! It’s like jeez bra manufacturers, I’d like you to meet my friend ROY G BIV — he’s full of other colors for you to choose from!

      • Emmaleigh504

        Back in my younger, more daring days I wore a hot pink bra under a pretty thin/see through, pale pink, men’s dress shirt. It worked really well with my pink hair. And my parents never said anything! Come to think of it, school never said anything either. Maybe it wasn’t as daring as I thought : /

    • skj84

      One of my favorite bras is hot pink. I’ve never really had an issue with it showing through clothing. Granted I usually wear a cami under my shirts as well.

      • epric002

        i am currently enjoying my most-comfortable-underwired-bra-ever, albeit w/a cami πŸ™‚ apparently this season’s 3rd color is hot pink (actually, raspberry) but past seasons had a light pink and baby blue. i’m going to try and hold out for some additional colors. but holy moly is this thing comfy!

        • Emmaleigh504

          my favorite bra of all time only comes in black, beige and now white! Total snoozeville. One would think that a style that is a big seller would get some fashion colors.

    • Congrats on the bra success! I’ve been going to Trousseau since I was 16 and they are simply amazing. I have the like 8 of the same bra in nude or black and I wish they had more colors.

      • epric002

        so either we’re all wearing the same bra or bra manufacturers really need to expand their color offerings across the board πŸ˜‰

        • Since we’re still bra-vangelizing, I’d like to give a shout to my favorite standby bra, which now comes in at least six colors. Check out Natori’s Feathers Contour Plunge Bra. It’s not cheap, but I’m in love with it. And it now comes in yummy burgundy and light grey.

          • epric002

            ooo that’s really pretty- how firm is the band? i usually wear a 28 unless the band is really snug. and plunge doesn’t usually work for me either, but i keep on trying to find one that will (yes i know that’s the definition of insanity). up until saturday my fave was the freya deco wire free (!!!) which is incredibly comfortable. now i’m loving the cleo by panache maddie moulded tshirt bra.

          • YES. This is my favorite too!

          • And shout out to the ladies at the Pentagon City Nordstrom for recommending this bra to me. I love it and have it in many colors!

          • The band is pretty firm and it’s the only plunge bra I can ever remember wearing and liking. I can’t get cleavage no matter what I do, but this bra somehow makes my non-cleavage look nice. It might be worth ordering it from someplace like Zappos with free returns so you can give it a shot risk free. Maybe this will be the one for you too.

            Both of the bras you just recommended also look perfect for my wide boob root πŸ™‚

        • justinbc

          I’m kind of curious why the colors matter? If you only see it for the few seconds before you put your top on, and again after you take it off, what’s the difference?

  • GiantSquid

    Revel: Fantastic weekend. Perfect weather for riding.
    Revel: Accepted new job for start in November
    Rant: Have to give notice at current job.
    Revel: Dinner at Zaytinya tonight.
    Revel: Going to take a week at end of October and go to Portland & Seattle for our wedding anniversary. Please shoot me suggestions for places to go, eat, drink, bike, hike, sleep, etc.! Has anyone done the train?

    • Top Pot Donuts, make sure to try pumpkin if they still have it, and Zig Zag Cafe in Seattle.

    • Revel in Freemont:

      Paseo by Golden gardens (great sandwich that you can eat on the beach):

      Walrus and Carpenter for Happy Hour oysters then go next door tasting menu at Staple & Fancy Mercantile for dinner with great cocktails in Ballard.

      Happy Hours at Ray’s Boathouse or Anthoney’s at Shilshole Bay to watch the boats go by and the sun go down over the Puget Sound.

      Wine tastings in Woodenville just North of Seattle

    • justinbc

      It’s been 4 years since I was there last, but here’s some suggestions from my last trip…
      Portland: Screen Door (best brunch I’ve ever had), Stumptown Coffee Roasters, Forest Park, Powell’s Books, Tea Chai Te, Lan Su Chinese Garden, Portland Japanese Garden, Higgins Restaurant, Doug Fir Lounge, plus lots of really great food trucks
      Seattle: MOD pizza for a quick bite, Sushi Kappo, Paseo, Island Soul Caribbean Cuisine, Poppy, Umi Sake House, Lunchbox Laboratory, Serious Pie

    • I was just in Portland! So much good eating (and for such good prices!)

      We liked: Tasty n Sons (breakfast or dinner), Lardo, DOC, Box Social, Pine State Biscuits, SALT & STRAW (!!!!), Ox, The Big Egg, previously suggested gardens, the Saturday Farmer’s Market (don’t know what it will be like in Oct, but it was spectacular last month), biking on the Banks-Vernonia Trail (biking around the city would also probably be nice – I’ve never seen so many bikes in a US city), the beer (the west coast in general has such terrific beers.)

      Have a great time! And good luck at your new gig and giving notice at your current position!

      Sad I missed: Le Pigeon and Waffle Window (I love eating)

  • justinbc

    Rave: While I was sitting out in the swing on Saturday more than a dozen different folks heading to H Street Festival complimented the new design of our house on their way up there. So far I’ve heard pretty much nothing but good comments, love it when people appreciate the uniqueness.
    Rave: I’ve tried 3 different flavors of 2nd St Creamery ice cream from HT and all have been outstanding, particularly the salted caramel with chocolate chunks.
    Rave: FSU narrowly escaping with a victory despite Winston’s boneheaded actions handicapping them for the game.

  • Revel: Seeing Dan on the FlyerTV station at Dulles!

  • Formerly Broken Jaw

    Rant: Uneventful workout at the AB-Y although I did issue one citation for excessive mirror time.

    Rave: Fruit, cheese, meat and adult beverages on the patio at Lupo Verde yesterday, perfect end to summer!

    Rave: I had penciled in β€œBad Mood Monday” for today but then I saw the bright orange pumpkin sitting on my kitchen counter. How can you be in a bad mood if you have a pumpkin?

    • You cannot be in a bad mood if you have a pumpkin. It’s like…science, or something. πŸ™‚

    • Emmaleigh504

      I think I’ll put a pumpkin in my office so that work won’t be quite so soul-sucking, thanks for the idea!

    • GiantSquid

      Your pumpkin observation is on point. I walked into work today, and the front desk had a large, bright orange pumpkin sitting on it. Mood: immediately improved #science

    • Yes! I got a medium sized pumpkin and two tiny ones and put them on my credenza, then I accessorized with a bowl of candy corn and some scented pine cones. It is seriously Fall-like in my house. It makes me so happy.
      It also makes me so happy that I hate candy corn, I don’t have to worry about eating all that sugar or using my decoration.

    • Formerly Broken Jaw

      The lady at the farmer’s market tried to give me a pamphlet of pumpkin recipes and all I could think was β€œWhat, do I look like a cannibal? β€œ

  • skj84

    Rave: fun weekend with the family. My parents threw a belated birthday dinner for me and my sister. It was nice having everyone in the same place at the same time. We’re all going to be scattered for the holidays this year.

    Rave: We went through my Great Aunt’s photo albums. Found photos I’ve never seen before of my grandfather as a baby and my mom and aunt. Plus found one album from my Great Uncles time in Japan during WW2, that may be of historical value. It had photos of the signing of Japan’s Surrender amongst other fascinating pics.

    Rant: I wish I had more options to follow my families genealogy. My mom has done research but most of the older family members have passed away or have Alzheimer’s. I have so many questions about my background.

    Rave: Went to PA RenFaire with my sister. I haven’t been in two years. Always love an excuse to dress up.

  • Rave: Vegfest! So many good free samples and even the non-free options were worth the cost. Also had a wonderful time walking there from NW with a good friend.
    Rant: I’m thinking of “breaking up” with a friend of mine and can’t decide if it’s better to actually say something for the sake of closure or just let it fizzle out, as it already seems to be doing. She used to be one of my closest friends but I think our relationship has grown toxic. Every conversation with her now makes me sad, angry, confused, or some combination of the three. I don’t feel comfortable telling her anything personal anymore because I think she’ll respond in a hurtful or condescending way. She moved away at the beginning of the summer and although I still see her from time to time, I don’t think it can continue. I’d love advice on a long-distance friend-breakup if anyone has any.

    • Sounds like the friendship is starting to recede. Since she moved away, you probably don’t have reach out to her.

    • Just let it fade out. I don’t see the need to “break up”, especially since she moved.

    • I wish it was easier to just let it fade. We have a bunch of the same friends and she was a big part of my life for several years, so I somehow feel like I need to address it more directly.

  • Rant: Rescue org that we got our dog from contacted me last week to see if I’d short-term foster this weekend for a dog that’s been stuck in a kennel waiting for adoption. I said yes and was really excited about it, but then they didn’t contact me again and didn’t respond to any of my messages. I know this org is pretty disorganized and it frustrates me thinking of the dogs that might be missing out due to the disorganization. Part of me wants to keep working with them to try to get them organized, but the other part of me thinks I’ll be better utilized and be able to help more dogs with a different org.
    Rave: Got my first request to pet-sit on rover today! If I can’t short-term foster, might as well get paid to look after other people’s dogs.

  • Rant: My dog’s separation anxiety has stirred the neighborhood into such a frenzy and formal complaints are headed our way πŸ™ probably going to have to break our lease and move somewhere with a back yard unless we can get it under control. No amount of running/walks has settled him. Anyone go through this with their neighbors?

    Semi Rave?: Clicker training is slowly making an improvement.

    Rave: Orioles – Red Sox game yesterday. Finally got out of the house for a few hours yesterday without complaints from neighbors.

    • FYI — although you posted as Anonymous, your username is showing up in your avatar. I think it’s something to do with cookies.

    • If you’re breaking your lease, try to help your landlord find a new tenant (even better if it’s a friend for whom you can personally vouch). If you make the situation fairly effortless for your landlord, the landlord will probably be willing to refund your entire security deposit.
      As frustrating as your situation is, try to remember that you’ve put your landlord in a bind through no fault of his own. Technically, you’re still on the hook for your rent through the duration of your lease.

      • Also, a note of apology and a bottle of wine left on the neighbor’s doorstep can go a long way to assuaging their concerns. They might be able to overlook the daytime noises.
        If your dog is causing a fuss at night, then you really ought to get out of there.

    • My dog barks a lot but I haven’t had complaints (yet).
      Have you tried anti-anxiety meds for your dog?

    • What exactly is the problem? Is the dog barking all day? You might consider an ultra-sonic bark stopper. Have you tried extra-good treats when you leave? Like a Kong stuffed with frozen peanut butter or one of those treat puzzle-balls.

      • We haven’t found out if we have formal complaints yet, so no idea what our options are yet. I definitely don’t want to move but appreciate all your support and suggestions. It’s causing me such heartbreak because rescuing a dog our goal has been to give him a better life, he is so happy when we are all home with him but the second he is left alone he loses it.

        The majority of the barking is early morning hours (5 am – 8 am) with us home (he gets a 1.5 mile walk/jog every morning and multiple long walks at night) and anytime we try to leave. His crate is his safe place and he loves it, but we have tried homeopathic anxiety meds, We have tried kongs with frozen peanut butter, chew toys, you name it.

        We’ve also gone the friendly neighbor route with notes and chocolates, maybe booze is the next step.

        • Try non-homeopathic anxiety meds?

        • I sympathize with your situation and I’m a dog lover, but there’s no amount of notes, wine or chocolate that would make me OK with someone else’s dog waking me up at 5 more than a couple of times. It sounds like the next step would be actual medication, instead of homeopathic medication, the quality and strength of which is unregulated and therefore the results are hard to predict.

        • epric002

          if he’s barking while you’re at home, that doesn’t sound like separation anxiety to me (unless you’re keeping him separate from you while you’re home???) have you tried working with a trainer? the fact that he loves his crate also sounds unlike what i know of SA. are you feeding him in bowls? w/our SA foster puppy we stopped feeding him with bowls and exclusively fed him kongs/treat puzzles when we left so that he was hungry enough to focus on getting the food out of the kong/puzzle and didn’t notice that we were leaving. if he’s food motivated, have you tried rewarding him for increasing amounts of silence if you step out of sight? you might have to start for really short time periods- like 30 seconds- and slowly work your way up. the point is that the dog does not get attention/rewards/praise/come out of his crate/whatever, until he is quiet. we were literally doing this in 30 second increments. calming music or background noise might help too while you’re gone. i would highly recommend working with a trainer to see if you can get some improvement, and if behavior modification doesn’t work there are definitely pharmaceutical options. good luck!

    • epric002

      as the others have asked- what exactly are the separation anxiety symptoms? i’m sure a lot of us have suggestions based on the specific behaviors our dogs have exhibited. our last foster had some separation anxiety, so i know how rough it can be.

    • Is daycare an option? Or a dog walker? I’m assuming it’s a daytime problem with these suggestions.

    • At my old apartment building my neighbor threatened my dog because of his separation anxiety which caused to quite a bit of crying during the day. People are really not understanding at all. We have tried all the tricks and honestly it has only gotten better as he has gotten older and calmed down a bit. We did start leaving classical music on during the day and that seemed to help a bit.

      • Meant *These* people were really not understanding….the rest of our neighbors were great but our dog was crying only during the day when most people are at work.

      • If I work at home, or work night shifts and sleep during the day, why is the onus on me to be “understanding”?

        • +1 A huge part of being a responsible dog owner is being a responsible neighbor. People really shouldn’t have to be “understanding” of chronic disruption in their lives caused by dome one else’s pet. I hope the OP consults a trainer and a vet and if anxiety is a problem, tries prescription meds if the vet feels it’s warranted.

        • While I do agree with you, this guy was just a serious asshole. Literally banging on my door screaming at my dog on multiple occasions. Neighbors even got involved telling the guy to cut it out.

      • Hold on a sec. I think we can all agree that doing harm to a dog is wrong (at least one that isn’t actively doing harm to you at the time), but you’re being intellectually dishonest. It doesn’t seem like your neighbor threatened your dog because of its separation anxiety, but because of the noise. So your placing the blame where it doesn’t belong makes me wonder where else you’re distorting your story. Was the dog really just whimpering, or was it barking? Be honest.

  • RAVE: scored a date with my quarry for the last four months, who, whilst talking on the phone with me, said “so, you wanna take out with new woman in your first date, huh?” ME: “you mean the woman I’m talking to right now?” “Mm-hmm.” “Oh yes (giggles).”

    RANT: this woman is a live electric wire, and I feel like I should be super-protective of my heart – which is totally open at the moment, and full of glee – to keep it from being zapped and damaged by her interpersonal plasma. I know for certain – 100% – that I’m not the only guy angling for her.

    • Maybe you didn’t really mean it that way, but something with “quarry” sounds distasteful.
      It sounds like you know this woman is no good for you, but are pursuing her anyway. Good luck with that.

      • Everyone’s gotta live and learn right? Sounds like a headache and way too much potential drama for me, but sometimes you gotta experience something to then avoid it for the rest of your life.

    • Emmaleigh504

      I hope you give us updates. I’m intrigued by this woman.

  • maxwell smart

    RANT: I’m starting to wonder at what point unpaid overtime has reached it’s limit of being acceptable and what the official DC policy is on unpaid OT for salary employees. I have literally spent the last 4 months working no less then 70-75 hours a week and it’s really taking a toll on my mental and physical well-being.

    • What does your manager say? Because no manager worth his or her door that closes wants their team putting in those hours. If you haven’t brought it up, there’s your first step.

    • If you’re salary, you don’t get OT. Obviously, there’s issues

      • Oops, hit send too soon. Obviously, there’s issues at your job, but I’d bring it up to your boss in a “hey, I’m overwhelmed and things aren’t getting done the way they should be” way than mentioning anything about being paid more.

      • Not always, as Anon noted below. I had a salary job in California for a private company, but would get OT if I worked more than 40 hours/week (which was very rare). I was not a manager. Very similar to my current gig in government (except now I get comp time instead).

    • Accountering

      It depends what you are doing, and your salary tbh. If you are Big Law, and making $160k, than yeah, 70-75 is acceptable. If you are in public accounting and making $60k, and working those hours (outside of busy season/couple of months a year) it is a big issue, and you should bring this up to management/start looking for another job.

      • maxwell smart

        Nope, it’s not at big law nor am I making $160k – not public accounting either but that’s about the salary range I’m dealing with. It’s not that management is unaware this is happening – but it’s mostly just been treated with a knowing smile and a chaste “thanks for putting in the extra hours”

        • Accountering

          Thats a tough one then… There are a lot of variables here, and that depends how you move forward. Long hours are certainly part of some jobs, but those kinds of hours seem a bit ridiculous. Public Accounting starts at close to 60k now, and you work 60-65 during busy season, and 40-50 the rest of the year. You also get bonuses, and get raises in the 10% range each year.
          If you are not getting those perks, nor that kind of training/resume building, I would tent to say you should bring this up to management, and if there is no progress, I would start looking elsewhere.

        • Are you in the private sector? Is your office understaffed and they can’t/won’t hire extra people? Is there any mechanism to earn comp time?

    • Legally, whether you must be compensated for overtime is not determined by whether you are salaried. It is determined by what your role and responsibilities are. At a very basic level, “managers” do not get overtime. Others do. If you have any doubt about whether you are due compensation for overtime, consult an employment lawyer.

      • Actually, it depends if you have “exempt” or “nonexempt” status. Role and responsibilities play a role in that, but so does salaried v. non-salaried (in most circumstances). (Seriously, PP, misleading half-explanations are worse that no explanations.) Anon OP, you could google “FLSA exempt” for a brief primer that may explain your legal status, but from what you’ve said (your managers know you’re working a lot, and don’t even contemplate OT), your company believes you’re exempt. Whether they’re correct or not, I couldn’t say, but if you are, it’s an employee morale issue (a significant one), not a legal issue.

  • KSB

    Rave: FInally going to the dentist tomorrow! After being a religious 2x/year dental patient, it’s been years since my last cleaning. Damn kids and their needs and my poor prioritizing…
    Rant: Nationals ticketing. Friday and again today. Pure insanity and I was “forced” to buy a pair of suite tickets for Game 2. My competitiveness got the better of me and I jumped on the insanely expensive tickets. And how are there more than 3000 tickets on Stub Hub already? Infuriating.

    • Emmaleigh504

      grr that reminds me that I should have gotten a call for an appointment over the summer. I hate my dentist’s office. they never call and remind me about my appointments. Don’t they get annoyed that no one shows up for their cleanings?

      • My office doesn’t send reminders, either, which I think is weird. They send me autogenerated emails on my birthday, I don’t see why they can’t send reminders that it’s been 5 months since my last visit and I need to schedule my next cleaning.

        • KSB

          Right? No reminders IS weird. I love filling out the postcard for my next appointment and then having it show up in my mail! Email would be pretty good too, I suppose. I’m pretty pleased with the fact that I’ve instilled my love for the dentist in my children too. They watch for those postcards and act like it’s Christmas Day when they arrive.

        • Emmaleigh504

          I scheduled my cleaning and they still didn’t call! But I don’t get birthday emails either. I need to find a new dentist’s office. I do like my dentist, but the front office is terrible.

        • Huh, I must be the only person who hates getting doctors’/dentists’ reminders. It always leaves me thinking “I’ll make an appointment when I want or need one, thank you very much!”

    • Rant: I’ve been trying to shop for dental insurance for about 5 months. No company is straightforward. Half can’t even give me a live person to talk to, the other half won’t give me answers to plain questions. Does anyone have dental insurance they recommend (Self-pay – want to choose my own dentist.)

  • Becks

    Rave: Had a great time at the DC VegFest. I had a coconut! Yep, that’s right. A man chopped the top off a coconut and stuck a straw in it. It was delicious!
    Rant: Had a major Migraine on Saturday that left me shaky and ill. I barely moved on Sunday.
    Rave: New things on the outlook at work. We’ll have to wait and see if they are for the good, the bad or the ugly.
    Rave: Two of my friends got engaged, moved in together and are now adopting a dog! I am so happy for them.

  • Rant: People who stretch out holiday “seasons” completely out of proportion
    Double Rant: People who stretch out holiday “seasons” around events that are minor holidays at best
    Triple Rant: People who, before it’s even October, already have installed their Home Depot Ghost Village/Scary Graveyard/Fake Cobwebs all over their front yard.

    • Emmaleigh504

      I have a friend in Dallas who has had his Halloween stuff up for weeks. I think he put them up September first. It’s his favorite holiday. Gotta get your Halloween fun early b/c in about a week or 2 the Christmas bombardment will start.

    • Speaking of Halloween, if anyone is looking for a spooky ghost tour, last year husband and I did the “Ghosts of LaFayette Park” walking tour put on by DC Ghost Tours. It was great. ^_^

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