Random Reader Rant and/or Revel

Photo by PoPville flickr user JEO Photography

You can talk about whatever is on your mind – quality of life issues, a beautiful tree you spotted, scuttlebutt, or any random questions/thoughts you may have. But please no personal attacks and no need to correct people’s grammar. This is a place to vent and/or celebrate things about daily life in DC.

196 Comment

  • Just a PSA- if you were almost hit by a bus going east on Columbia rd near 16th street last night around 6:45, I was on the bus and send the following complaint to metro in case you want to follow up. I think you weren’t hit, and really hope you’re ok.

    “I was riding in the back of the bus and as it pulled to the right to get to the stop before Harvard rd and Argonne Pl, it pulled to the right into bike lane and nearly hit someone on a bike. The bicyclist was a bit ahead of where I was sitting on the bus, so probably about where the back door to the bus would be. I don’t think the bus driver even looked to see if anyone was there, he just pulled to the right after where the parked cars stopped across the bike lane and nearly hit the person. Had the person on the bike not been going fairly slowly and stopped very quickly, he or she would have been seriously injured. I don’t even think the bus driver realized it happened. It was a very scary incident, and I was only a passenger on the bus, I can’t imagine what it was like for the person on the bike. “

  • Last day I’ll post this: we’re holding a PoPville dinner at the Rose’s Luxury private rooftop. Come join us! We have 5 interested so far and need 3-5 more! The dates that seem to work for everyone right now are Jun 25, 26, or 27.
    Info: http://rosesluxury.com/private_events/
    Sign up: goo.gl/CcR2J6

  • Rant: I have too many meetings today to get any real work done, and I have a really long to do list. Apparently none of it is as important as posting my rant. Happy Friday!!

  • Rave: Happy Friday Yall!

    Rant: Rooming houses next door to me… I can never get any privacy/peace on my front doorstep or in my back yard. Too many people crammed into these rowhouses!! Beginning to think about an exit strategy from DC to Hawaii.

    Rant: Neighbors blocking off our alley for their kids to play in it. On a work day during rush hour? Seriously? It’s not your extended back yard just because you chose to build a garage in your real back yard…

    Rave: Deftones music, wish they would do a show at the 9:30 soon.

    • justinbc

      Fair warning, as expensive as housing in DC is, Hawaii is even more so.

      • Pretty much everything is since it’s all got to come in on a boat. It’s still pretty great though.

      • I went there in 2009 for 2 weeks, gas and normal goods were pretty much exactly the same as DC where I live… The rare imported stuff like Nutella and Candy was a bit overpriced, but it’s really not much different than here except for better weather, beaches, peace and quiet, and a slower pace.. exactly what I need in my life.

        • i lived on oahu for a while in 03-04 and it was awesome. there is still a level of stress, but at least you have blue skies, gorgeous water, and sunshine. and you can wear flip flops just about anywhere, as in most places they are considered professional attire. good on ya!

        • I’d give up Nutella for the excellent sushi they have there!

        • One of my coworkers is from Hawaii (and just asked me to be a bridesmaid in her wedding there next year!). A lot of food goods are more expensive (like milk, which I think she said was usually $7+, and meat).

          It does seem amazing though – if I can ever afford it, I’d certainly consider it too!

  • Rave: Happy Friday Yall!

    Rant: Rooming houses next door to me… I can never get any privacy/peace on my front doorstep or in my back yard. Too many people crammed into these row houses!! Beginning to think about an exit strategy from DC to Hawaii.

    Rant: Neighbors blocking off our alley for their kids to play in it. On a work day during rush hour? Seriously? It’s not your extended back yard just because you chose to build a garage in your real back yard…

    Rave: Deftones music, wish they would do a show at the 9:30 soon.

  • RANT: Found a massive (over 3″ long) cockroach in our apartment last night. Frantically chased it and then it escaped under the oven.
    RANT: In round 2, we discovered that the massive cockroach could actually FLY. No no no no no no. 😡
    RAVE: My roommate took the broom and swatted the cockroach out of the air, baseball bat-style. Dead cockroach. We are getting bait traps, spray, and an inspection by the management company.
    RAVE: This was our first cockroach sighting in 2.5 years (we are on an upper floor in a boutique building). The hot weather is bringing them out.
    Related RANT: Mosquitoes are back in full force. I got 4 bites on Wednesday night on my feet and ankles. 🙁

    • I light sprinkling of powdered boric acid along the baseboards works well

      • GiantSquid

        Oh yes, they can fly. Boric acid works for many bugs, including fleas, but you have to be very careful if you have pets. Sequester the pets in an untreated area, treat the rest of the domicile, make sure all the excess acid is cleaned up before releasing pets.

    • I saw some on my back patio last night! Not three inches–more around 1 inch. Still that’s too big. I’m planning my strategy now.

      Anyone have cockroach fighting tips?

    • magpies

      Seconding boric acid. I puffed it in all the dark spots in my basement and behold, dead cockroaches. Oh, and just to note, a lot of brands have a bunch of filler. I had to look a little for 100% boric acid.

    • Take it to the next pestaurant event.

    • Arggggh! I still remember waking up finding those climbing on the wall of my Columbia heights row house a few years ago!! I remember whacking at the wall so hard my pictures fell down – those things were terrifying!!

    • Yup, saw a massive roach in my kitchen a few days ago too, which also escaped under the oven and I didn’t get a chance to kill it 🙁 I put down boric acid and I hope I don’t see it again!

    • I’ve never seen a roach the entire time I’ve been in DC, but they were a huge problem when we lived in the ‘burbs. Be grateful you’re not seeing any baby roaches– that means they’re breeding!

    • Emmaleigh504

      Watch our when they fly, they go straight for your eyes!

    • Those “Water Bugs” are a nightmare. They are one of the fastest insects on earth, and they fly as you said. The problem is that this city is infested with them, I highly suggest a door sweep if you are in an apartment. Also have them seal up any connecting plumbing or HVAC lines.

    • I will never forgive Southern Management Company for the shoddy-ass job they did of treating a MASSIVE, MASSIVE roach problem when I was in graduate student housing at the University of Maryland.

  • epric002

    rant: water main leak at 10th & Quincy STs NW. still. i have reported it 3 times now. the person at DC water i spoke with said that Verizon has to repair something at Georgia & Randolph first. WTF people. it’s been over 48 hours. what a ridiculous waste of water.
    rave: helpful neighbor forwarded the issue on to muriel boswer’s staff. maybe they’ll have more luck getting it fixed.
    rave: met another lovely neighbor while walking the dog this morning.
    rave: i love where i live. happy friday popville!

  • Rave- Mosquito Beater garlic spray. Get it on Amazon, apply it yourself. Smells to high heaven but it works.
    Rave – nice meal at Chez Billy last night with out of town guest.

  • Rant: Have to take metro from Union Station to Vienna today.

    Rave: Instead of going back to the office, I’m going to go straight home and make it an early day today. Also, fun gathering of Big Green Egg enthusiasts in Manassas tomorrrow, and the weather is supposed to be perfect.

  • Rant: I am so hung over and have a bunch of meetings today. No bueno. I’d love to hide in my office all day buvet that’s not going to happen.

    Rave – The piece on the three DDay vets in the Express, even if it did make me cry on the Metro.

  • rant: unending work travel. in my 20s i used to love traveling for work. now, not so much. i think i’m getting old and curmudgeonly.
    rant: LDR. which is even more complicated by travel to countries where my phone doesn’t work.
    rave: this weather!
    rave: 10:03 anon for reporting a cyclist almost getting hit by a bus to WMATA. when i got hit, they brushed it off because there were no witnesses or corroborating reports. if only the bus driver hadn’t driven off with a bus full of witnesses!

    • Ditto. It’s the worst when you’re in a constant haze of jet lag and find yourself looking around your hotel room (which looks like every other hotel room) and having a momentary lapse where you’re not sure which country you’re in.

      • yeah! and i lot of what i was supposed to do on my last trip was schmooze, which is hard when i can’t remember what continent i’m from, much less who/why i’m talking to the person in front of me!

        • Totally! And when you zone out for a minute because you’re so tired you could pass out on the floor and then snap back to reality right after the person across from you has clearly said something very important that requires a well-articulated response from you. I’m amazed that people don’t think I’m an idiot sometimes.

          • I have this too and I always wonder how everyone else stays awake. I have had moments in meetings where I have actually dozed off when taking notes and when I go back to the record of the important things someone said my handwriting trails off and its a problem that I don’t know what I need to know. Jet lag is cruel.

    • They have sucked all the joy out of traveling. Now it is just one indignity heaped upon the other.

      • yeah…additional rant: this was my first trip after getting global entry, and i still got pulled aside for extra screening by customs and border control coming back to the US. and it wasn’t to search my luggage, which i get, it was to ask me all sorts of extra questions about where i had been, what the purpose of my travel was, etc. i thought the whole point of global entry was that you’re prescreened as less of a threat? the immigration people were really nice, but my coworker (who doesn’t have GOES) ended up having to wait while i got the extra special screening and questioning.

        • The last few times I’ve used GOES it wound up only being marginally faster than the regular lines. In fact, O’Hare now has GOES-style kiosks that everyone uses. The real value for me is the automatic membership in Pre-Check, which has saved me countless minutes while traveling domestically.

  • Rant: Saw a poor guy discover in real time this morning that his rental car with NC plates at the corner of 13th & Q fell victim to a smash and grab. He had left a bunch of junk in the back seat. There has to be a more effective way of communicating the risk involved here.

    • They should teach this stuff in drivers ed. classes.

      • Eh, I think driver’s ed is very region-centric. I grew up in the sticks and learned the proper etiquette for passing a tractor on the road, which doesn’t tend to come in very handy here. I do think, however, that not leaving stuff in your back seat in an unfamiliar city (ESPECIALLY overnight) is common sense. And having rented cars at National before, I think a lot of the places to tell you not to leave valuables in plain sight. Some people just see a nicely tended neighborhood and figure there’s no risk.

        • While it may be common sense not to leave “valuables” in a car in plain sight, it’s not common sense that in our fair city you cannot leave ANYTHING visible in a car parked on city streets and need to strip the car clean before walking away from it. I can’t blame the victim here.

          • Eh – If you are from a town where a smash & grab is a rarity, then you wouldn’t think twice about leaving things in your car. In my hometown, i would have no qualms about leaving my purse, phone, GPS, etc in my parked car.

        • So…what is the proper etiquette for passing a tractor, just in case I ever happen to come upon one?

          • Basically, it’s like passing any other car – do it on a straightaway, make sure there’s no oncoming traffic. But you have to give a tractor extra room because they’re top-heavy, so they tip easily, and also they don’t have the capacity to do any kind of defensive driving should you do something stupid. You don’t have to go very fast to pass one, and in fact shouldn’t – it’s more dangerous that way. Also, most tractors don’t have turn signals, so in many cases it’s helpful to flash your lights to let them know you intend to pass (to ensure they don’t try to make a left into a field or onto another road at the same time), and they’ll wave you on.

        • Honestly, I’m from the sticks too (where people don’t even lock their cars/houses all the time) and I never considered it until I started reading PoPville… which was after I’d been in DC for 5 years or so. I probably should have, but it never even crossed my mind when I briefly had a car for work in Northern Virginia.

          • Hooray vagueness from being braindead. I mean, I never even considered that people would break into a car over *anything* left in it – I wouldn’t leave my purse or anything, but if I had empty grocery bags/bags with random stuff I hadn’t brought back to the apt/etc I wouldn’t have thought to make sure I take everything out promptly.

    • Totally universal problem. Happened to me in Tours, France. And I was a NYer then, and knew not to leave anything at all in my rental (or any) car. Unfortunately, that doesn’t always prevent people from breaking the window to see if there’s anything in the glove compartment, out of view. Suppose I could leave the glove box wide open and empty…

  • dcgator

    Rant: Last night’s basketball game. Too late, too hot (that kind of temperature is dangerous, to say the least), and a letdown at the end.
    Rant: I need 5 pm to come soon. Flagging at work after a busy week.
    Rave: Fun weekend planned. French Open Final, visiting the Smithsonian, Drum Circle!

  • Rave: Gorgeous weather, trying to find something to do in VA with the little people besides our typical park fare
    Rave/rant: Old company wants me to come back. At a big pay bump. I know all the reasons I left and yet still find myself considering the offer.
    Query: Whatever happened to MonkeyErotica?

  • Rave: Pride!
    Rant: My partner hates Pride so I always have to beg and plead with her to go to any of the events with me. Last year I convinced her to go to the parade for 30 minutes; maybe this year I can try for the festival?

    • Why try to make her go if she doesn’t like it? Sounds a little rude to me. Can you not do things alone?

      • Sure, but then she gets upset that we’re not spending time together.

        • Give her a book on overcoming co-dependency. This is not healthy!
          You shouldn’t be made to feel guilty because you enjoy something innocent like the Pride Parade. That’s a whole ball of crazy.

        • Sounds like this problem is not about Pride then. You two need to get on the same page.

          • Well, I would like to spend time with her too. She works late during the week and visits her mom a lot on the weekends, so we don’t see each other much even though we live in the same house.
            I’m just frustrated because she used to be a huge party girl who was all over the Pride stuff, and now she wants none of it. I’ll go on my own if I have to, but I’d enjoy it a lot more if she were with me!

      • Also, she suffers from depression, and sometimes you have to force depressed people to get out and do things they don’t feel like doing. She always appeciates it when I’m able to get her out of the house, but it’s a battle sometimes.

  • GiantSquid

    Revel: It’s garlic scape season. Going hunting at the farmer’s market this weekend and buying as much as possible. Then making a ton of pesto and eating it on everything.
    Revel: Grilling steaks and drinking Manhattans tomorrow with a good friend I haven’t seen in four years. Weather is predicted to be awesome.
    Revel: Going back to BicycleSpace to check out (again) an All-City SpaceHorse for a touring/commuter bike. My road bike’s great, but I want something with racks and bigger tires for riding around DC. I’m not riding as much as I want because the road bike isn’t good for commuting.
    Rant(ish): I’m inside an office when it’s gorgeous outside.
    Rant: Getting the two year itch at work. Great place but not doing what I would prefer to focus on and the drive to MD takes so much out of me I don’t have energy for freelance work. Wonder if current boss would let me knock position down to part-time or teleworking. Anyone approached their boss with similar proposal? Results?

    • AH! What farmers market do you go to? I’ve been looking for garlic scapes!

      • GiantSquid

        I know the market on Thursdays on 8th St. NW just north of the Navy Memorial sometimes has them. I live by Eastern Market so I’ll be trolling them this weekend. I also know they’ll be in the first delivery next week of my CSA, One Acre Farm, and he was looking for some additional signups, so you could do a partial share if you were really desperate.

    • I commute on my road bike, but it’s only a couple of miles to metro. I made sure to upgrade to more puncture-resistant tires when I bought it.

      • GiantSquid

        I want a rack for panniers and I’m not putting it on my road bike as well as flat pedals rather than clipless. A bell. A coffee mug holder. An adjustable cage to fit a wine bottle.

    • U Street FM said there will be garlic scapes there tomorrow. What recipe do you use for the pesto? I might try to do some…

      • Try making garlic scape hummus, it’s delicious

      • Melissa Clark has a great recipe for garlic scape pesto in her cookbook, Cook This Now. You might be able to find it online. Its very garlicky and delicious. She pairs it with, I think, ricotta and spring peas for a pasta dish.

    • 14th and U FM had garlic scapes last week.

    • shaybee

      Ohhh, I want a Space Horse so bad, but it’s so outside my price range… I’m afraid to go test one out, because I’m afraid if I like it I will want one eve more!

  • Hi! Does anyone know where to get garlic scapes in DC? Or does anyone know that their farmers market will be carrying them?

  • Rave: Friday! I’m so thankful for the upcoming weekend and some time at home.
    Rave: I bought new jeans when I was in NYC for work this week. Nice to have a pair that fit properly.
    Rant: Being a bridesmaid is expensive.

    • where did you get jeans? I hate jean-shopping and I’m always on the lookout for a good pair since the usual suspects (Gap, etc.) don’t fit me all that well.

      • epric002

        have you tried the denim bar in pentagon row?

        • I haven’t because I’m kind of scared of it, honestly. They take their jeans WAY seriously, and I just want pants I can wear on the weekend.

          • epric002

            oh. well, you probably don’t want to spend much money on them then. for me, it’s either money or fit. i can buy a cheap pair that don’t fit very well, or spend time/money finding/buying a pair that fit really well. i’ve never found cheap & well fitting jeans.

          • Really I’m looking for the magical unicorn pair that fits perfectly and is not too expensive… but when I come back to earth, I’ll probably try the denim bar. 🙂 Thanks for the suggestion!

          • It’s possible! I found the perfect pair at Zara of all places. I really wasn’t expecting that because their clothes are generally better for tall women with rail-like figures, and I’m short and curvy. The nice thing about jeans is that they last forever, so I’m set until straight legs go out of style.

      • I found a pair at TJ Maxx. It was just stupid luck. I have a horrible time finding jeans that fit properly and don’t cost an arm and a leg. I blame the hips that I inherited from my maternal grandmother.

      • skj84

        Nordstrom Rack has great selection. And not too expensive. Actually I recommend Nordstrom Rack for everything. It’s my favorite store in the area.

    • Rave: My friend just asked last night to be one of her bridesmaids. For her wedding in Hawaii, where I have never been. So excited!!
      Rant: Not exactly sure what being a bridesmaid entails (friends are only just starting to hit the mass marriage stage and most of my family is across the pond, so I’ve only been to one wedding), and a little nervous about the cost! The bride already said up front that we should tell her if anything will be financially difficult though and she is very easygoing.

  • Rant: friends moved way out to the suburbs, to a place that is not metro accessible and is about an hour by car. Makes sense for them – they both work from home, it’s cheaper, their town is cute. Great. BUT they are constantly complaining about how no one comes to visit them. And when you DO go visit, they get hurt if you only want to spend a few hours and don’t want to stay the night. So much so, that it makes us dread trekking up there, because we’re going to take a round of passive-aggressive comments on how they never see us and guilt-tripping that we don’t want to spend our WHOLE weekend camped out in the ‘burbs. Ugh.

    • Sounds like they didn’t plan that out well. If you’re going to move away you need to either make some friends out there or figure out how to entertain yourselves. They don’t seem to be willing to do any of that.

      • Frankly, they sound like selfish people. My prediction? They will quickly find themselves in friend exile.

        • Yeah, when I lived in Annandale I just accepted that my life was going to be less social (but this aligned with my reason for moving out there anyway, which was to save $$). Fortunately I have a lot of hobbies I could keep myself busy with.

    • I don’t think they’re selfish, I think they miss their friends. If they’re friends worth keeping, I think one of you–whoever’s closest to them or the most diplomatic–needs to explain to them the situation and ask them to ease up on what feels like guilt-tripping, intentional or not. I would especially emphasize that when friends do make the effort to visit, it still feels like it’s not good enough. This reminds me of family dynamics. Mom complains that son never calls. Son doesn’t call because whenever he does mom complains that he never calls.

    • We have the reverse problem. All of our friends keep moving further out west in VA and don’t want to come see us in the city! Granted, we all went to college in the burbs so we were initially there, but I am constantly baffled that we are the only ones who moved into the city after graduation.

      • Having a guaranteed parking spot for my suburban friends helps a lot with getting them to visit. I found the most stressful part for them was wondering whether they’d get street parking. It’s a luxury, but worth it.

        • Good tip! However, I don’t think it will help in our case. Parking in front of our house is actually really easy and our friends have never had problems. Many of them have preconceived notions about the city that we have desperately tried to show them are not true.

    • If they want to see you, why don’t they come to the city?

    • This actually sort of happened to me when I moved into the district (except I didn’t whine about it). I just don’t see my friends anymore, even the ones from Arlington or Alexandria. I probably should have realized that, but I didn’t. They didn’t want to wait to go out late enough for me to go out there (and often choose places I can’t get to on metro, so I’d have to commute home, then drive out to dinner, so it would be late), and they were unwilling to come I to DC to see me (even though some of them work in DC). Three years later, and we’re basically not friends anymore. It is sad, but it happens.

    • Thanks, all. They are clearly lonely, but will never admit it – it’s always “our friends are so wonderful here and we love it,” which makes that conversation even more difficult. They will occasionally come into the city (twice a year?), but then they want to sleep over and spend the whole weekend together and get hurt if you can’t clear the whole weekend — or at least a whole day and night — for hosting them. You can’t just get together for an afternoon, you have to clear your whole calendar for them if they’re going to make the effort needed to drive here. It’s gotten to the point where the costs of maintaining the friendship — and the regularity of the maintenance needed — are far outweighing the benefits/value we get from it. I think when either of us has kids, we’ll probably do the fade-away.

      • So you have friends coming to spend some time with you and you can’t clear a day or a weekend with enough advance notice? And if you are not– is it always something where they can’t be included? geeeshhhh

      • I have this problem with my mother-in-law. She lives an hour away and is lonely, but it’s painful to go out there and sit in her dark stuffy house on a beautiful day. She likes visiting us but won’t drive, so that turns into an all-day affair where someone has to drive out and get her and bring her back at the end of the day (she doesn’t like spending the night). Wish she just lived closer or at least on a metro line!

        • Your MIL sounds like a real pain in the ass. What ever happened to common courtesy? Jeez.

          • Wait, how is she lacking courtesy? I mean, I hope when I’m that age I’m not that dependent on other people, but she’s a widowed minority in a soulless suburban neighborhood. She stays busy duing the week with work, but her family is all she has for companionship.

  • Becks

    Rave: Lady Carlotta is better than an alarm clock. I had hit snooze three ties or so and she decided that was enough! I needed the extra help getting up this morning.
    Rant: My back is so sore and I didn’t do anything fun to deserve it.
    Rave: I have a massage scheduled for after work today. Come On 5PM!!!
    Rant: It is B-E-A-utiful outside and I am inside, at my desk, with no windows.

    To the Popviller who asked if people on Popville have been extra crunchy lately, Yes we have!
    Crunchy People Unite!

    • Becks

      Forgot to post
      Massive Rave: Orange is the New Black Season 2 tonight!

    • Hahaha — my cat has occasionally served as a feline snooze button. “Not up yet? OK, I’ll come paw at your chin AGAIN!”

      • Becks

        Lol! Lady Carlotta decided that it is perfect Pats time and if my hand won’t move, she will rub her head on my hand. Either perfect Pats time or she is trying to shove me out of bed. LoL!

  • skj84

    Rave: Eye Doctor appointment was relatively painless. Even the contact fitting which is usually the worst part. Now I need to find new frames. I’m thinking about going online, looking at Warby Parker, Zenni Optical and EyeBuyDirect. Anyone have luck finding frames online?

    Rave/Rant: I got a job interview for a position in Minnesota. They want me to come in for an interview on Monday. I’m going to ask if I can skype the interview, but I’m worried they will say no. I’ve actually never applied for jobs out of state, what is the protical for interviews and such?

    Rave: This is really shallow, but I wore heels for the first time since my race yesterday. My leg felt strong enough and they didn’t kill my feet! I missed wearing heels, especially since I just took all my wedges out of storage.

    • I’ve had great luck with Warby Parker. About to order another pair, actually.

      • I’ve bought glasses from Warby Parker too! Love the virtual try-on (super easy with an ipad) and the home try-on. They were super-quick, and while they don’t to the fancy anti-glare coating and other stuff, my last pair are still going strong 18 months later.

    • If it’s a job you applied for, and knew it was in Minnesota, then you’d be expected to pay your way out to the interview unless they offered. Unless it’s a tech company, I doubt they’d opt for a skype interview over a real person-to-person experience.

      • skj84

        I know of a few places that will skype. I applied for a non tech position in New York last year and we did several skype interviews. I sent them an email explaining my position. If they let me do a skype interview awesome, if not oh well. I did mention in my cover letter where I’m from. I am going to be in Minnesota for a week in July, but figuring out timing with applications has been hard. I’ve sent applications in and didn’t hear from the company about interview for the open position for weeks. This one I sent yesterday and heard back this morning.

      • This person only has until Monday for this interview. If the company really wants him/her, they will arrange a Skype or phone interview (at least for step 1). Otherwise, they should give him or her time to arrange for a flight. Skype is not that odd, though, for a first stage interview. I know someone who lives here, and did one for a job that is here! It’s an intel position, and it probably was easier to just do skype rather than the whole process they have to go through to clear a person just to get into the building or onto their grounds. For first round interviews, this shouldn’t be a big deal.

    • Re interview – if this is a job you want then you need to go to MN for the interview.

    • I dont think skype interviews are weird at all. As we are job searching from abroad, most people have been very understanding and work around time difference. At my old company we would always accommodate skype interviewers as well. I think you should say that you would love to fly in and visit, but for such a short notice if you could do a skype interview.

  • Rave: The greatest generation….even though this generation of those who have served are truly the greatest because, unlike in WW2, America doesn’t seem to give two shits that we were at war. Seems like all of those i know who have been to war in the last 12 years still have trouble with things like jobs, finishing education, ect. So rant?

    Rant: So few WW2 veterans left to tell their stories. My pop-pop is alive, but he probably made a deal with some higher power to never die and in return will do nothing but ask my father questions about how to work Apple products every single day. He joined Facebook to find people he served in the War with. It was sad because none are left.

    • Perhaps the WW2 vets your pop-pop knew aren’t on facebook

      • it’s very true – he’s 94. He doesn’t think that’s possible, everyone’s on FB! That, and many, many are dead. He’s an odd 94 year old – super active, very into technology (he times our Skype calls). But up side is that he has scanned a lot of his pictures from his time in the service, which is neat

        • justinbc

          My mom just joined Facebook in the last couple months, and she’s significantly younger than that. It’s very likely his old friends are in a retirement home without even a computer of their own.

        • My 95-year old grandfather is a WWII (and POW) vet. He is fairly social but not on Facebook. I’m not sure if he knows what it is.

          He is great, btw.

  • Rave: Happy pride!! Hopefully I can power thru this year- so many events, so much booze!
    Rave: morning jog done. #operationgetchose

  • Question: My lady friend and her soon to be wife and considering adoption and I’m struggling at finding a subtle way to suggest they lean towards going with a girl rather than trying to raise a boy in a house with 2 women. Anyone have experience with this or advice on how to tactfully approach the subject?

    • DA FUK?
      Here’s my advice: mind your own god damn business.
      If you still want to be friends with these people, you’ll keep your mouth shut. Seriously.

    • Answer: It’s none of your business.

    • Why do you think they shouldn’t raise a boy? Lots of lesbian couples have boys. I guess I’d start with asking which gender they are considering, which would then lead into a discussion of the pros and cons of each, and you could insert your opinion there.

    • Women raise boys all the time. Men raise girls all the time. Say nothing and do some serious introspection, please.

    • Becks

      Really none of your business. Family is family no matter the sex. If you feel strongly about it mention it, but beware, you may end your friendship with your opinion on others lives.

    • I suggest you don’t approach the subject at all. Even if you are a close friend, I think it crosses a big border to start suggesting what gender they should or should not consider.

    • Eh, mind your own business unless they ask you. If you really can’t mind your own business then for the love of god just be straightforward about it – don’t “struggle to find subtle way”.

    • Just don’t. How is this your business? What are you so afraid of if they’re raising a boy?


    • Yeah. I think Carolyn Hax would say that IF your friend happens to voice in your presence any concerns on this topic, then AND ONLY THEN can you say anything. Otherwise, bite your tongue.

    • I don’t think it’s terribly out of line to say something like “Do you think bullying is a bigger problem for a boy with two moms than a girl with two moms”? Or whatever your worry is. And see if they agree/have plans to mitigate the problem if it comes up. Honestly, whatever concerns you have, if they’re at all legitimate, are things they’ve probably considered already. I’ll be they’ve given it a lot more thought than you have.

      • There are no concerns of this nature that are legitimate. Why would you validate this fool’s stereotyping behavior?

        • I can’t think of one specifically, except maybe the bullying, but maybe there’s something I haven’t considered. My partner and I aren’t interested in kids so this isn’t something I’ve ever seriously thought about myself. Although I agree there’s no reason why they shouldn’t have a boy, maybe there are specific issues associated with having a boy that they should be prepared for?

          • You’re being too generous. There are “issues” with having a child of either gender, but absolutely no reason — I repeat, no reason — that a well adjusted, happy boy can’t be raised by parents of either gender. And the same goes for girls. The bullying excuse is crap. It’s just like that racist judge in Louisiana who refused to marry an interracial couple. His rationale, in part, was that children of interracial couples have a difficult time and he was just protecting them. Absolutely insane reasoning.

          • FYI you sound even more close minded than the person you’re accusing.

          • Close-minded to bigots with theories that have been proven wrong? Youbetcha. Do you actually humor people like that? Would you say that someone with a race-based theory of parenting deserves to be taken seriously? I would hope not.

          • That was not me accusing you of being closed minded, by the way. I just wanted to give the guy the benefit of the doubt before jumping on the “He’s a troglodyte who lives under a rock” bandwagon. Maybe I am too generous with people like that though.

          • @ Anonymous 11:22: Nah, I assumed it was someone else. Anyway, the OP here is not just someone who is idly wondering about gender roles and parenting. OP has strong enough feelings about the matter that he or she (I have a guess as to which) is willing to butt into someone else’s family planning. Idly wondering? Acceptable. Harboring such strong feelings of prejudice so as to feel the need to interfere in someone else’s family? Scorn-worthy. Put another way, have we learned nothing from the interracial adoption episode of The Brady Bunch? Certain opinions are so stupid that they deserve to be mocked on national television.

          • Interesting; I didn’t know there was a Brady Bunch episode about interracial adoption.
            You might not be aware that — rightly or wrongly — adoption of black children into white families basically stopped because of pressure from the National Association of Black Social Workers:
            “[D]uring the civil rights movement, interracial adoptions in the United States increased dramatically and the numbers more than tripled from 733 cases in 1968 to 2,574 cases in 1971. (There are now about 6,500 cases a year.) It was then that the National Association of Black Social Workers condemned interracial adoption citing that adoptees were at risk for developing a poor racial identity due to lack of contact with role models of the same race. In the 1990s the placement of black children into non-black homes virtually came to a complete stop.”

          • I am a woman. Not that it matters to someone who is clearly sexist.

        • I don’t disagree that the OP is being kind of judgmental here, but you are, too, unless you truly have unique access to and ability to evaluate the entire universe of possible concerns of this nature.

          I didn’t have a dad when I was growing up and there are a lot of things about life as a guy that most of my male peers learned somewhere around age 7-10 that I didn’t until much much later. I wasn’t raised by a same-sex couple, I was raised by a single mom, but in any event, I definitely missed out on some things by not having a dad around. Would I have been better off with a dad in my life? Or worse off? I don’t and can’t know, and neither can you, because we don’t get a redo on those sorts of things, but I think you are being way too harsh and judgmental to the OP in the interest of presenting yourself as occupying some some sort of higher plane which does not exist.

          • There’s nothing wrong with the OP wondering/speculating whether there might be more challenges for two women raising an adopted boy than for two women raising an adopted girl.
            The problem is that it’s not the OP’s _place_ to present his/her opinion to the friend and try to steer her toward adopting a girl — because it’s not the OP’s business. It wouldn’t even be the business of a close family member to present an opinion like that, unsolicited. (Though we can probably all think of a close family member who routinely presents unsolicited opinions on matters both big and small, and who drives us up the wall.) And it’s definitely not a friend’s business.

    • what rock did you crawl under from this morning? Your comment makes me feel like I just got transported back a decade or two.

    • Soooooo many women have tortured and difficult relationships with their mothers for a variety of reasons.
      And tons of men have never had a close relationship with a male father figure because they were raised by a single mom.
      Please keep your opinion to yourself, simply because it has no basis in reality.

    • Yes, rock … crawl back under. Better yet, educate yourself. Not every child is raised by two parents of different genders, much less by two parents.

      Also, anyone I’ve known who has adopted has not specified a gender for the child they will adopt. Can you even do that? They are just happy to welcome a child into their family.

      • houseintherear

        My parents did that in the late 70s with me and my brother. They specified race and gender when applying to adopt. I still don’t fully understand it, but they had lost three babies late-term and wanted to keep their family as natural looking as possible. This was a long time ago, but… still. anyway, whatever.
        But yes, they basically “ordered” a boy first and then “ordered” a girl later. What was funny is that they put in papers for a girl right after my brother came to live with them, and they waited over 4 years. The day after they told the adoption agency that they would take either gender, they called and said a girl was just born… me!

        That was all in Virginia, the state of stupid and offensive adoption laws, so perhaps it’s not legal to specify such things anymore. I’m not sure. I do know that I can go to jail for a long time if I try to find my birth parents without the aid of the agency… ohhh Virginia.

        • “That was all in Virginia, the state of stupid and offensive adoption laws, so perhaps it’s not legal to specify such things anymore. I’m not sure. I do know that I can go to jail for a long time if I try to find my birth parents without the aid of the agency… ohhh Virginia.”
          Ugh, Virginia. That place is batshit crazy. No way in hell I would ever live there.

      • I think it depends upon the situation. If the couple doesn’t have any kids I think they are less likely to be picky. My parents did specify and that was allowed. I am my parents’ biological child and have two younger adopted sisters. My parents specified that they wanted a girl who was close to my age (7 at the time). We later learned that there was a girl in an orphanage who was available to be adopted who had a little sister. My parents didn’t want to break them up so they ended up adopting two girls.

      • Yes, you can totally specify pretty much anything you want when adopting (gender, race, medical conditions, etc.). However, the more specific you are, the longer you are going to have to wait for a baby. My sister is seriously considering adoption right now, and I know several parents of adopted children that went through various means, so I’m not just speaking without knowledge.

    • There is no possible way to “tactfully” approach that subject. None.

    • This is so none of your business. Stay out of it or be prepared to lose your friend.

    • Do your friends a favor and raise it. They should really know what kind of person they are friends with. I really can’t believe people still think like this.

    • So many rude response here. Is everyone really that incapable of empathy? I know it’s easy to bash online but come on…

    • Kenneth Faried would disagree with you.

    • skj84

      Don’t. Just Don’t. It is none of your business. It will never be your business.

  • justinbc

    Rave: Day off = installing new chandelier from Restoration Hardware and having new 2 x 4 skylight put in over the stairway. House is about to have a lot more light!
    Rave: Snallygaster tickets are on sale, and they’ve moved it back to Yards Park, which was so much better than the Union Station parking lot.

  • Rave: Happy hour last night with friends I don’t see often enough (and inadvertently discovered DC’s karaoke league)
    Rave: Rowing tomorrow morning for the first time this year
    Rave: Four orchids and an amaryllis in bloom
    Rave: No rants : )

    • Four orchids in bloom?? I am impressed! (I’m pretty good with plants, but only once have I ever gotten an orchid to re-bloom.)

  • Rave: Friday and I love my hood!

    Rant: Man the durn T Street Overpass locks are BACK again. We clearly have a lock obsessed nut in Eckington. The city has been out 4 times now to cut the locks off, CLEARLY saying don’t do it. Funny how the lock people think they are somehow better than the spray paint taggers. You are putting your own stink on public property, it is against the law, it has been removed by the city multiple times, you are a tagger, no better.

  • jim_ed

    Rave: Getting out of town this weekend to visit friends in SW VA. Roanoke is a hidden gem of a city – beautiful housing stock, cool restaurants, funky little bars, and its pricing for everything compared to DC is like going to Mexico.
    Rant: Missing Capital Pride. Even though I feel a tinge swaggerjackery going, We’ve always really enjoyed it. And we always try to bring our even yuppier suburban friends to broaden their horizons a bit, which has always been a big hit.

    • Not swaggerjackery at all! One of the things I love about DC’s pride is that there are just as many (if not more) straight people than LGBT people in attendance. It really makes me feel like we have a lot of allies.

  • Rant: Lost my wallet while biking last night somehow. It fell out of my bag I guess?
    Rave: Only had 2 CCs, license, and metro card in it.
    Rant: It was the Van Gogh metro card.
    Rave: Capital One and Discover made canceling/ordering new cards painless.

  • Quotia Zelda

    Rant: Canceled my garage account, but they still charged me for June. Now I have to get that all sorted out.
    Rant: My office’s “constant ideal temperature” is about 5 degrees too cold for me.
    Rave: I plan to sleep until noon tomorrow!

  • houseintherear

    Rave: My doggie Pablo is going to be in the Animal Fix again today. Glad PoP isn’t sick of him yet. 🙂
    Rant: Boy I am sick. Sicky sicky sick. And at work, which was a huge mistake. Buuuut it’s a good excuse to go home, lay on the couch, and watch OITNB!

  • rave: promotion!
    rave: intern (very bright and eager)
    rant: intern (being shadowed is not fun)
    rant: I can’t get excited about work today.There’s a massive dataset staring at me and all I can think about is fixing the soaker hoses in my garden and what kind of punch to serve at the bbq next weekend.

    …any recommendations on a good non-alcoholic punch? I’m doing a cheap&cheerful sparkling demi-sec rose with limoncello for the boozers, but I’m struggling on the beverage for the responsible guests…hibiscus tea arnold palmers?

    • There are a lot of interesting lemonades you could make. I’m partial to rosemary or basil lemonade, but ginger lemonade is also a nice summer treat. Another of my summer faves is lemonade with cherry-flavored seltzer.

  • Rave: picked out some Atlantic Coast Line memorabilia for my dad for father’s day.
    Rave: absurd cocktail party tomorrow evening.
    Rave: Thai X-ing this weekend.
    Rant: just found I’ll be on a work trip with my boss for a week in July. Anyone have any recommendations for things to do in Santa Clara, CA?

    • Yeah, leave it and go to San Francisco or the Santa Cruz mtns. Santa Clara is about as dull as you can get. Good luck!

  • Does anyone live in Arlington and have a recommendation for a good place I can go to get my car’s oil changed?

    Rave(ish): Last day at my current job. Sad to leave great coworkers behind, but ready for my next step!
    Rave: This weather – perfection!

  • Revel: Just saw about a million termites flying off from their stump on Roosevelt Island. For a little while it was like being in a snow flurry – very cool.

    Also – big salad of 2 kinds of lettuce, spinach & 2 kinds of arugula from the garden.

    Rant: I can’t grow bleu cheese.

  • Thanks for having chosen my photo. It titles “Love”, great photo for this post!!

Comments are closed.