Random Reader Rant and/or Revel

Photo by PoPville flickr user ep_jhu

You can talk about whatever is on your mind – quality of life issues, a beautiful tree you spotted, scuttlebutt, or any random questions/thoughts you may have. But please no personal attacks and no need to correct people’s grammar. This is a place to vent and/or celebrate things about daily life in DC.

153 Comment

  • Query: I posted this late yesterday, so I’m not sure anyone saw it. Can anyone recommend somewhere in DC or the close-in suburbs to get a receiver repaired?
    Rave: A little over a day left at work before I leave for Thanksgiving!

  • Gas. I was up all night with My 2 month old who had gas. Never did I think I would be so blissfully happy to hear someone fart. I even did a little dance!

  • Rave: Got a new nephew. Born yesterday!

    Rant: They didn’t use any of the names I suggested (Angus, Lemmy and T-Bone.)

  • rave: got an opportunity out of the blue for my dream job
    rant: not entirely sure that now I have the chance that I really want it. job consists of 50% travel to developing countries and no opportunity for promotion
    rave: being recruited out of the blue for dream job feels pretty awesome!

    • Have you done much travel to developing countries? They can really wear you down. On the other hand it sounds like an awesome experience.

    • Would this be an experience that could lead to another dream job? Do you want to spend time working in developing countries?

      • yes, I definitely want to spend time working in developing countries (have done plenty of travel there in my own time), but 50% is a LOT of time… that is my major hesitation

        • It’s awesome if you are prepared to have your personal life take a backseat to your career for a while. Great experiences, people, stories, and per diem! But it’s tough to maintain a relationship, and you miss out on holidays, get togethers, and other stuff. I did it throughout my 20s and early 30s and it was the best! But now I’m grounded back here stateside and couldn’t be happier. Good luck!

        • 50 % travel can be a challenge – can you see yourself doing this for a year or two? Do you know how long the typical trip would be? Longer trips are easier for me than multiple short trips `

        • I did this for two years (6 months out of the year split between S. America, Africa, and Asia; the remaining 6 months stateside). it was exhausting. after that experience, I decided i never wanted to travel for work again. everyone always thought it was so exciting and exotic that i was running off to Brasil every few weeks, but really i would sit in an air conditioned ministry office staring at the computer and was always so busy that i never got to see anything except the inside of a taxi, the inside of a ministry building, or the inside of my hotel. i loved what i did, but it just got to be too tiring. if, you get to spend a significant chunk of time in each place, it might not be so bad, but i was basically commuting between HQ and each of my project sites every single week and never knew what continent I was on or what time zone i was in.

          • Same! I used to wake up in the middle of the night (always jet lagged!!!) and freak out because I didn’t know which country I was in. Even happened when I was back in my own bed. Crazy stuff!!!

          • I ought to show my GF these responses. She is so insanely jealous of her friends who travel for work, but I think most of the time those people go to boring places and are jet lagged and rundown from living in airports and hotel rooms. That must take a toll on one’s health. They just snap a cool pic when they’re someplace exotic and post it to facebook so it looks like their lives are so glamorous. πŸ™‚

          • yeah…ambien was my best friend. there’s nothing like traveling for 20+ hours, hopping off the plane, and then being expected to make a presentation an hour after arriving in country in front of a bunch of high level ministers and other government officials when you haven’t slept in almost a full day.
            plus, with all the itinerant traveling, i never got to know a single place really well, so was super dependent on local counterparts for everything. i hated being the american who needed babysitting. in my 3-4 months i spent in brasil spread out over 2 years, i barely learned enough Portuguese to navigate my way around. i already knew some swahili from all the time i had spent in e. africa before that job, but traveling to the region once a month for a week at a time also wasn’t enough for me to really learn any more, so everyone always had me pegged as a foreigner… going to the market was always a challenge. and forget about trying to pick up chinese or anything useful in india (besides english). between the sleep deprivation, jet lag, and language issues pretty much spent my entire late 20’s confused!

        • Do it! I work in int’l humanitarian development, and I do a lot of hiring. Candidates with significant field experience have a big edge, even for home office jobs. You can go back for another degree at any age, but this is the kind of edge you can only acquire now. You might say now “sure, I’ll tow a spouse and kids along to Mogadishu for a six month gig!” but you won’t. If you’re youngish and unattached, this is the single biggest boost you can give your career (assuming you’re in dev for the long haul).

  • Emmaleigh504

    Rant: There is an eyelash in my eye.
    Rave: It’s almost Thanksgiving!!!

  • Rave: Roasted sweet potatoes and pineapple. Thanks to the person (epric?) that posted the recipe – it’s going to be on the menu for our post-Thanksgiving dinner. We usually have roasted root vegetables and this will be a nice variation.
    And rave: Not having to travel far for Thanksgiving.

    • Can you please post again? That sounds delicious!

      • Preheat oven to 450, cut up sweet potatoes and pineapple (I used 1 medium sweet potato and 1/4 of a fresh pineapple) and mix in bowl with a little bit of oil, salt and cayenne. I also added roasted cumin. Spread on baking sheet, cook for about 30 minutes (until the sweet potato is done), stirring every 10 mins or so. Easy!

        • No offense, but that sounds sickeningly sweet. I think sweet potatoes are best paired with contrasting flavors.

          • I think it would be good without the pineapple! But then again, I’m the only person in my family who doesn’t like the Thanksgiving sweet potato and toasted marshmallow casserole.

          • agree about the sweetness. I make almost the same exact dish, but instead of pineapple I use cut up jalapeno peppers.

          • I also thought it would be too sweet – but it was more sweet potato than pineapple; the cayenne & cumin helped to tone down the sweetness as well.

    • epric002

      it wasn’t me, but enjoy πŸ™‚

  • epric002

    rant: cold rain.
    rave: our dog-reactive rescue has had a great week *not* reacting to dogs on our walks! twice now we’ve had other dogs pass us on the same sidewalk without having a meltdown. copious training treats FTW!

    • What did you do? I took a seminar on leash etiquette but none of the techniques seem to work on my dogs.

      • epric002

        copious treats. we’ve had her a year this saturday and it has been a work in progress this entire time. we always carry treats on walks, whenever i see a dog i start watching her and as soon as i see that she sees the other dog, i ask her to sit and she gets a treat(s). sometimes we have to feed her treats the entire time she sees the dog, other times she’s fine just getting one and then ignores the other dog. she used to react to dogs a block away, and now (usually) as soon as she sees one she looks at me expecting a treat, which is great, and just this past week i’ve been able to get her to sit and accept treats while another dog walks by on the same sidewalk. i’m amazed, and hope i didn’t just jinx it all πŸ™‚

        • Okay, I tried that, but we live in a very populated area and one of my dogs reacts to people as well as other dogs. So we’re stopped every foot or two and it takes and hour just to go around the block. So I guess my real question is, where do I get the patience that you have? πŸ™‚

          • epric002

            i think we’ve both posted about this before- fortunately my dog only reacts to other dogs. have you tried a reactive dog class?

          • No, I don’t think that was me. I can’t afford classes with the dogs but the Leash Aggression seminar I took with the WHS was really helpful and walked us through everything. Their approach was basically to stuff the dog with treats as well.

          • I feel your pain. I actually muzzle my dog/people reactive dog on walks now just because there are so many people with off-leash dogs and people who walk right up to us that it’s an accident waiting to happen. It helps me to relax which in turn helps her to relax. Oh, and lots of well-timed tasty treats, and turning around and getting the heck out of a bad situation waiting to happen.

          • I guess I should be grateful I don’t need to muzzle mine. They’re sweet as can be but love to lunge at bark at everyone. I noticed my neighbor goes out of his way to avoid us, even though he knows my dogs and knows they don’t bite. πŸ™

          • epric002

            do you have some patient friends who are willing to help you out by acting as pedestrians so you can work on positive reinforcement with them? i mean, i’m a dog person and i’d probably avoid my neighbor and their dog if it lunged and barked at me every time πŸ™

          • what, you’re afraid the leash is going to snap and the dog is going to get loose and sniff around your feet or perhaps look up at you adoringly?

      • I can’t recommend highly enough the Reactive Dog class at Spot On Training (they use space at Metro Mutts on H Street). I’ve kind of given up on our dog because it feels like every time we take a step forward, if we stop being on guard for a minute we take 20 steps back. I know what we need to do but it starts to feel like a full time job… So we just try to use cars or walking in the other direction to block her from seeing other dogs.

        • epric002

          we are planning on doing a reactive dog class early next year too. glad to hear it worked for you!

        • I live in the heart of Capitol Hill. Unless we’re out at 4am there’s absolutely no way to avoid other dogs. πŸ™ In retrospect I should have done this training when we lived in VA where there were no dogs and no one ever went outside.

  • Rave: I love Task Rabbit. I have a writing project I’ve needed help on for ages and just couldn’t figure out how to get it done. Enter Task Rabbit, and I love, love, love the guy I hired to do it. And I will probably hire his partner to do the illustrations, also through Task Rabbit.

    Rant: I didn’t come up with the idea for Task Rabbit. Sigh.

    • Has anyone tried being a Task Rabbit? I have a lot of odd skills and capabilities that I feel someone could benefit from (and I could use the extra cash).

  • Rant: Being one of three people, each of whom has been the absolute dictator of large Thanksgiving dinners for most of the last two decades, trying to collaborate on a Unified Feast Theory. Who knew that the girlfriend had such strong opinions on linens and candles?
    Rave: Not spending 36 hours cooking and cleaning.
    Interesting: Realizing that — with the kids around you getting old enough to have kids of their own — you (and your friends) have become the aunts and grannies and sisters (and girlfriends eager to please the matriarchs of their new families) Rockwellian legend, and things you just did because they seemed fun years ago and stayed fun, are evolving from habits into traditions, with all the baggage and delight traditions bring.

    Rave: Phone call saying I’d cleared the first hurdle and they’d be in touch r3egarding a flight to Cali for an interview, as soon as I filled out the web form.
    Rant: Why do I need to spend 45 minutes filling out an on-line form when, not only does it ask only for information already included on my resume, it asks me to up load the resume itself? Is this the dynamic and creative private sector of legend, or just some corporate bureaucracy?

    • Try not to drool so much when you arrive in Redondo. If you have time, grab some breakfast at a beach side cafe or diner before your interview to get into the California pace of things. California has a waaaaaaaaay different corporate culture – much more laid back and casual. πŸ™‚

      • What am I going to do with all those suits and ties? As for beachside cafes, the lady who called said it was 75 degrees when we were freezing here, so I’ll definitely be exploring the great SoCal outdoors if I get a chance.
        What, I wonder, will I do with all my suits and ties?

        • Funeral, court, and wedding attire πŸ˜€
          Seriously, you’ll still need the occasional sport jacket for “nicer” dinner events. I know you’re a lawyer, so that’s definitely a little more buttoned up than other industries in CA. But it’s totally acceptable to wear dress shoes, nice & properly fitted jeans, a button up (open collar) and blazer to office 5 days per week (including meeting with clients).
          Ties are definitely out of the wardrobe!

    • Last year we had the opposite problem. Without my mom, there was nobody used to being in charge of a holiday dinner and we all incorrectly assumed someone else would take over. Totally a Charlie Brown thanksgiving, without the grandmother to save the day. At least this year I know there’s a void to be filled!
      The beauty of thanksgiving, though, is that in the end it’s the people and not the meal that matters. Happy thanksgiving!

    • I’m only half-way through the 36 hours of cooking and cleaning! Getting a little pale at the idea of 13 family members arriving tomorrow and staying 4 nights! But my advice is generally to yield to whoever has strong feelings about anything – while also entirely removing your own efforts from that endeavor.

      If someone has strong feelings about linens – great – knock yourself out – but I’m not shopping, washing, ironing etc. Special food you want to make? Super – bring it. But know there is no oven space so plan accordingly.

  • Rant: I’m worried about flying out tonight to Hartford. Weather sounds awful and if the flight is delayed/canceled tonight, I’m seriously worried we won’t be able to get up there. Nor’easter is hitting New England tomorrow.

  • Rave: Big success on a big project for my son’s school!
    Rant: what is the next project?

  • Electronic Service Center in Rockville. My friend took an old receiver there and they did a great job.

  • Rant: Found out my boyfriend was cheating on me. Broke up yesterday.
    Rave: Friends coming over and just being there.

    • πŸ™ That stinks. I don’t know if you are at all spiritually inclined (I’m not), but I read this book by an Irish theologian after hearing him on a NPR podcast. Anyway, he has an “ending of a realtionship” blessing I found really therapeutic during my last break up:

      Virtual hugs.

      • I’m not very spiritually inclined either, but a friend gave me a copy of one of Pema Chodron’s books (I think it was called “When Things Fall Apart”) after a bad breakup, and I found it helpful (also good for all kinds of other rough patches in life). Probably not everyone’s cup of tea, and I’m not a Buddhist, but some elements of the philosophy really resonated with me.

    • how did you find out? Its ok it gets better! Not all guys are monsters. Actually seems like females these days (in this mid 20’s) are blood sucking vampires with no soul.

      • I like this. Condemning sweeping generalizations about men while simultaneously making a sweeping generalizations about women.

        • Yeah, how strange. And, condemning sweeping generalizations that weren’t even made! (Unless something was deleted.) Also, the use of the word “females” makes me roll my eyes every time.

      • The ladies are just catching up to the scummyness and self-centeredness that men have inflicted on the female gender for millennia. Equal opportunity (to be an asshole)! πŸ˜€

    • I’m sorry, but yea for good friends! Hang in there.

    • Good for you for having the good sense to break out with that dude. Many people would reason their way out of making a good decision like that.

  • Rave: Was going through depression around this time last year…felt so alone. NOW, I’m happy as a clam πŸ™‚ In a beautiful place, emotionally πŸ™‚

    Rant: Sleepy

  • Rave: Hosting an Orphan Thanksgiving with my girlfriend and our friends whose families live too far to travel
    Rave: Cooking a Turkey for the first time at 25. It can’t be too hard, right?
    Rant: Having a wonderful mother who’s agreed to be on speed dial in case of poultry emergency.

    • Hey, me too πŸ™‚ Pioneer woman has good pointers as well as alton brown’s turkey tip video’s !! Good luck

    • Emmaleigh504

      My sister says it’s not difficult to cook a turkey and she does a pretty darn good job at it. The biggest bird I’ve ever cooked is a duck and it’s easy, so you’ll be fine πŸ™‚
      And if something does go horribly wrong you’ll have an amusing story! I have many amusing stores from all the times my aunt tried to have turkey at Christmas. (She now does build your own extravagant sandwiches and sundaes. It’s super fun–shut up Schwesti!)

    • Cooking a turkey is ridiculously easy. Just remember 20 minutes per pound at 325 degrees. You can go simple – slather it with olive oil and pour about a cup of wine in the cavity (adding herbs or half a lemon or onion is good too). Then forget it until you start to smell it. If it is getting too brown, put a tent of aluminum foil on it.

    • I think that’s about the age I was the first time I cooked a turkey, maybe a few years younger…it’s all getting hazy! Anyway, it’s very easy. Just make sure if you’re cooking it in a regular oven (as opposed to a turkey oven) that you tent it with foil. Leaving it uncovered dries it out.
      Another good tip is pour boiling hot water over the turkey before you season it- this will tighten the skin and keep the juices in!
      Oh, and food.com has some great turkey seasoning recipes- just do a search and pick one you like!

  • skj84

    Rant: Obnoxious coworkers.Especially new ones who run thier mouths.

    Rave: Thanksgiving! My family is doing it potluck style this year. I’m brineing thr Turkey and doing a side. Easy Breezy.

    Rant: Worried about my sister’s flight being delayed. She’s due in very early tomorrow morning.

  • Rave: Closing on my house tomorrow!!!
    Rant: Moving…although this time will be the last time for a good while. As someone who has pretty much moved every year for the last 10 years…its kind of unsettling.

    Weirding me out: Due to being so transient for the past decade (group houses/studios), I’ve never really had a lot of “stuff”…I’m having a hard time adjusting to the whole needing to buy nice things. I’d imagine for most people this would be awesome but its really just stressing me out. I don’t want to have an empty house forever…buying a house is really overwhelming.

    • Resist the urge to “buy nice things” just to fill up the new house, it’s not really necessary. First off you don’t need the hassle – as you said it’s overwhelming and why add to that for no reason. Second, you will probably need to buy a few things to make the house usable, but take your time living in the new place to figure out what you really want or need there – don’t just rush out and buy a bunch of stuff that you think a new house needs. Your house will be full before you know it and you want to make sure it’s all stuff you actually want there.

    • You don’t need to get everything at once. Just the basics. It will take about a year to settle in and figure out what styles and items work for the new space.

    • congrats on the house! it’s exciting and maybe tempting to go out and buy furniture to fill the space immediately. i’d recommend waiting and trying to settle in first. it’s totally fine to have empty rooms/space for awhile, just prioritize rooms and go one at a time. you may also consider working with a designer (maybe there are some affordable ones out there that popville can recommend?) – someone to help hone your style and find pieces to fit. or try looking online and at magazines to determine what you like before you go shopping.

    • My girlfriend was just complaining about having too much unnecessary stuff. So I asked her “Why did you buy all that stuff in the first place?” Her response: “Because we needed it for the house.” It’s circular logic.

    • From a designer standpoint, I recommend taking your time too. Figure out how you want to use the space before you buy anything and come up with a plan. Nothing wrong with a minimalist home if that’s what you are comfortable with.

    • It’s actually good to wait to fill up the house. My brother and sister-in-law bought new furniture for how they thought they wanted to set up their new house before they even moved in. After living there a couple of months they realized it made a lot more sense to swap the dining room and living room, have the sofa on the other side of the TV room, etc. and they were stuck with furniture that didn’t fit the new configuration. It cost them a lot of time and money and hassle to then replace it all/live with furniture awkward for the configurations.

    • I will echo the advice to live in the space for a while before you go out and buy a bunch of things/furniture. Of course you need a bed, a sofa and stuff like that, but resist going out and furnishing/decorating every room right away. After having lived in our house a year, we still are changing things and making it just right. Really, if you plan on being there a long time, there is no rush and you should make sure you’re getting what you want.

      • Thanks everyone! Yeah Im thinking this is good advice. I’ve got some projects to do on the house anyways so it wont be the end of the world if I have empty rooms. I just have to remind myself to take a deep breath and do one step at a time.

    • Agree with the others. Wait until you have lived in the house for a few months or year. Husband and I were in a similar situation and didn’t really own much other than a crappy couch, bed and computer desk. When we bought, we made the mistake of impulse buying “deals” or Ikea furniture to fill it up. Over the last three years, we have been slowly replacing these items with better quality items that fit the house and better fit our lifestyle. Looking back, we have wasted money and time. Plus, there’s the energy spent on trying to sell or give away the old items that we don’t want.

  • RANT: was a bit hungover on Saturday morning and watched an hour long infomercial on the Masterbuilt Butterball turkey electric deep fryer. OMG, the meat looked SO DAMN GOOD.

    RAVE: managed to stay strong and did not order said deep fryer off the TV for $200.

    • It probably just looked good because you were hungover.
      My office had a raffle for one of those, and I had the typical urban-dweller’s reaction of “where on Earth would I store such a thing??” I think it would be more of a burden than anything else.

      • Haha, I wish more people understood this “urban dweller reaction.” I kind of get a little nervous around Christmas time because my parents try to buy me a lot of stuff (admittedly, I am blessed to have parents who enjoy spoiling me even at this late age) but my second reaction after joy is “oh crap I have absolutely no where to put this.”

  • Rant: Had to drop my girlfriend off at work in Alexandria this morning so I can use my car for Thanksgiving travel. It took almost an hour to get there and another 45 minutes to get back into DC. Got into work soooo late.
    Rave: I don’t live or work out there. The drive reminded me of how terrible people in NoVA have it when it comes to their commutes. Feeling really grateful. πŸ™‚

    • actually, we take metro just like people in DC, so it’s not that terrible

      • But you have to drive in gridlocked traffic, or sit in a bus in gridlocked traffic, to get to the metro station first (unless you live in one of the more urban parts of Arlington or Alexandria). I used to live in NoVA myself, and driving everywhere was the least-terrible option, so this morning brought back a lot of bad memories.

      • Anyway, if people out there could simply take the metro I wouldn’t have had to have driven my girlfriend out there in the first place (and she wouldn’t be using my car to get there every day). It’s unfortunate that very few parts of Alexandria have a metro station or reliable bus within walking distance, and that the highways are so inadequate that slugging is the best option for many residents.

    • Not all NoVa people have terrible commutes. My commute takes 30 min and that includes the 10 min of walking I do because I get off a couple stops early.

      • Yeah, if you’re willing to pay DC prices you can live walking distance to a metro and then your commute is no different than a DC resident’s. You’re kind of screwed otherwise, though.

        • Depends on where you work. Not everyone works downtown, for some people living in VA means living closer to work.

          • You mean people who work in other VA locations like Tyson’s or Reston? Yeah, they might as well live out there if they like it. But the commute’s still a nightmare if you work in other parts of DC. Working downtown or not has very little to do with it.

          • Lots of people work in Alexandria (e.g. PTO) and Arlington (e.g. in Rosslyn), too.

          • Okay, I should have said I feel sorry for people who live in NoVA and either work in the city or somewhere closer to the city than where they live, and don’t live within walking distance of a metro station or can’t afford to take the metro. That’s probably the vast majority of NoVA professionals, but yes, it’s true that some don’t have to go through commuting hell. I actually used to work at the PTO and lived in a building nearby. It wasn’t cost effective because the apartments around there are outrageously expensive, but I could walk to work.

          • I’m confused by what you mean by that. If you don’t work downtown your commute is probably going to be WORSE because there are fewer options for getting there. I work in an odd pocket of DC that’s a couple miles from a metro station, and coming from VA was bad because the only non-insane option was driving. Otherwise it was bus to Pentagon–>yellow line–>green line–>other bus (or long walk). If I’d worked downtown I would have taken the bus and then metro, and it wouldn’t have been bad, but switching trains and adding the second bus onto the end made the public transit commute too difficult.

      • I work with a lot of NoVA people who say the morning traffic’s not bad at all if you leave by 5:30. And if you can get on the road before 3pm the commute home usually isn’t terrible either.

        • UGH. Who wants to leave their house at 530am?
          I came in to work uber-early today (645am) to prep for a 9am meeting and the office was already buzzing with the Nova folks who drive in. I can’t believe these people get in so damn early every day. Not worth it, IMO.

          • Yeah, I always thought I could do it when I lived in VA, but day after day I’d find myself not waking up until 6 and getting stuck on 395 for two hours. Finally I wised up and moved to DC so I don’t have to plan my schedule around traffic patterns. I had a coworker who would frequently fall asleep at his desk because he was getting up at 4:30 every day. Who wants to live like that?

          • “Who wants to live like that?”
            Not me. But I guess that’s what these people got to do to afford “having it all.” Sounds like being a slave to your house and car!

          • Or splitting a commute with a spouse or sharing custody of kids who are enrolled in a school district out there or living near elderly parents or whatever. People live where they do for lots of reasons, and if it works for them it doesn’t matter if you’d want to trade places.

          • Of course. I just think it’s unfortunate that people who live there (by choice or otherwise) have to deal with such poor transit infrastructure. I remember reading an article a while ago about how the state legislature in Richmond is very stingy about allocating resources to improve roadways and public transit in the northern part of the state, which is why things are so bad for the people that live there. My 75-year-old MIL, who lives and also works in NoVA, has a very grueling commute that involves a driving to a bus stop, waiting for a bus that only comes every 30 minutes, getting on a metro train, and then taking a shuttle from the metro stop to her office. Everything has to be perfectly timed or else it can take hours. But it’s a lot better than driving apparently.

          • Totally agree with that – transit infrastructure is terrible out there (out there in NoVa, or out there in most of America!). I’ve built my own life around avoiding long car commutes, but some people just don’t mind or even notice. I do feel bad for people like your MIL, though, who have to cobble together horrible commutes that are affected if one link fails. And in her case, I could imagine that commuting between the same 2 locations 20 or 40 years ago was no big deal.

          • Most of America has no public transit whatsoever, but at least you can drive around easily.

  • epric002

    was in the same boat a year ago. resist the urge to fill it all up immediately! it took us MONTHS to decide what we wanted to do with certain rooms and i’m so glad we didn’t go out and buy new stuff to put in it just because. we’ve done one room at a time and i’m so happy with how things have turned out πŸ™‚ for us, scheduling events at our house gave us a timeframe within which to complete a room. hosted an engagement party in june- dining room had to be done by then. hosting a holiday open house next month- living room will be done by then. and that will give you time to figure out your taste(s), find stores that you like/are within your budget, pick paint colors, window treatments, etc. have fun and good luck!

  • Rant: officially broke up with the BF/fiance of 6 yrs last night. It was months in the making but still super sad.
    Rave: back to the gym tomorrow

    • did you end it or did he? Here is to new begginings!

      • I did. I feel extra bad b/c of the timing– he’s overseas for work, his work project is getting shut down,and he has a serious kidney infection. He sounded super depressed. But the relationship wasn’t going anywhere so I followed my gut and cut the cord.

        Thanks for all the kind replies! I’ll drown myself in pie and wine on Thursday.

    • No matter how right the decision, it’s rarely an easy one to follow through with… good for you. Hope you can savor your time blowing off emotional, mental, and whatever steam there is to blow off at the gym.

    • Same thing happened to me and my GF/fiancee back in 2010. We had been together for 6 years too.
      It ended up being for the best and I discovered a lot more about myself once I got out of that relationship.
      I took a month long trip to Europe soon after the break up and had a great time. I’d highly recommend doing something like that. It’s good to get away from home and just depend on yourself.
      And, uh, my dating life really took off. I was worried that no one would want me (“damaged goods,” and all that) but that did not turn out to be case πŸ˜‰

      • I had this same complex when my marriage ended. Now I’m writing a book (anonymously) about the last two years of dating! πŸ™‚

    • That had to be a really tough decision. I broke up with my bf of 7 years back in 2010. Like you, it was months in the making, but I felt so incredibly guilty and sad about it, and it took me a long time to feel better, but I eventually did. It does gets better. Remember to be kind to yourself. *Hugs*

  • Quotia Zelda


    But yeah, if you’re generally competent in the kitchen, cooking a turkey is not as big a deal as people make it out to be. You’ll be fine. πŸ™‚

    • Quotia Zelda

      Ooops, that was supposed to be a reply to Emilie.

    • Emmaleigh504

      IT’S FUN AND TOTALLY APPROPRIATE WHEN AUNT CAN’T COOK! She didn’t even know her oven didn’t work that one time AND SHE’S LIVED IN THE HOUSE 6 MONTHS!!!! Then there was that time she couldn’t thaw the turkey, then the several times the power went out. Face it sandwiches & sundaes are the best anyone is going to get out of her. DON’T FORGET THE FIRST CHRISTMAS MEAL YOUR HUSBAND HAND WITH OUR FAMILY AT HER HOUSE! AND SHE HAD HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

      • Quotia Zelda

        Oh, I get that on a rational level, but I still can’t bring myself to like it. But that’s okay. We’ll still have a fabulous time, and we’ll just come home and do a roast bird + Charlotte Russe for ourselves. And you!

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