31 Comment

  • They locked the bathrooms because it was being used as a meeting place for ppl seeking “night activities” in the park. I had a friend who lived in the apartments next to there who said he couldn’t leave his windows open at night or he’d hear strange sounds of men “grunting” all night.

    • Seems like you could solve this problem with the radical solution of locking the bathrooms at night.

      • They’d have to hire someone to do that on a daily basis. Budgets. Just do what everyone else does, and p in the fountains.

        • Hire an attendant. Charge 50 cents for use.

          Seriously, though, how much time does it take to unlock the bathrooms in the morning and lock them at night? You wouldn’t need to hire a new employee to do that.

    • ah

      “two job jonnies” indeed.

  • HAAAAHAAAAAA. Calling park Police for HELP!?! Get real.

    The bathroom is almost always locked. There are no posted hours of when the bathroom will be availabel for use – THAT would be handy to know. At least then there could be some form of accountability on hours of use.

    A week ago the bathroom was taped off, and there were trucks parked in front – couldn’t see if work was being done on it or not. So that may be a reason.

  • Why don’t they lock them at night when the park is ostensibly closed and open them during the day when most people are using the park for more legitimate reasons (or not).

  • Did these bathrooms really cost taxpayers a million bucks? Sinclair Skinner’s handywork?

    • I’m sure they did, at least that much. And like every other laughably-mismanaged project the Park Service takes on in DC, I’m sure it took about four times as long as it was supposed to, and will probably fall apart years before it was intended to be replaced.

    • It’s a federal park, so the DC Parks and Rec service had nothing to do with the restrooms.

  • Here’s an idea: How about these worthless, lazy Park Police get off their asses and actually patrol the restrooms and surrounding areas for illicit activities, instead of the usual harassing of people who are trying to enjoy the parks without doing anything illegal.

    • That’s a good suggestion.

      Friends of mine who live around the park are always complaining about unsolicited, ahem, conversations when they are walking dogs, crossing the park at dusk, etc.

      Why don’t the Park Police actually do something useful and patrol rather than just set up cones for rush hour on Rock Creek Parkway?

  • It is crazy – especially because the entire area of bushes around the Serenity statue is used as a toilet all day every day. I go there often (to the park, not to piss in those bushes) and have had friendly chats with some of the maintenance guys. I’ll ask one next time I can – (or anyone else could as well.)

    • Do you actually see this happening, or are you sniffin’ the bushes? Either way, it’s disgusting and you should call the Park Police whenever you notice it.

      • Are you serious? I walk along the path and smell it and see the piles of feces. My dog gets excited as a shopgirl mistress with a box of Russel Stover!

        There are at least 50 homeless people who spend the day in that park. No open bathroom – where do you think they go?

        By the way – The homeless people here are not aggressive or threatening. They simply need a place to spend their days. Just open the bathrooms and hire one of them to clean & patrol it.

  • “My dog gets excited as a shopgirl mistress with a box of Russel Stover!”

    What does this even mean?

  • Seriously? You find that hard to figure out? A “shopgirl mistress?” a box of cheap chocolates?

    This isn’t – “Her head is uptilted, her throat wide open; she is all alert and tingling with the shower of sparks that burst from the radium symphony. Jupiter is piercing her ears.”

    Which I just picked randomly from Tropic of Cancer.

    Should I just kill myself now?

    • What are you going on about?

      • She’s going on about ignorance at best, cultural illiteracy at worst.

        People need to read more. And not blogs, either.

    • You can kill yourself if you want to, but I still have no idea what a “shopgirl” is and no idea who Russel Stover is. I guess I could google the terms, but I’m lazy.

  • I just walked the dog in the park. This evening there was a laminated sign on each bathroom door saying “Closed for Services.” We’ve gone from services that produce “grunting” to prayer circles?

  • I’ve seen at least three times (two Hispanic dudes and one Hispanic dudette) leaking on a bush in the park during the daytime – and I’m not over there often. Strangely, you don’t see people doing this in nicer neighborhood parks in the city that don’t have bathrooms. I’m guessing it’s certain people who have been basically raised like feral animals.

    • Ooooh, a PoP comment classic!: race baiting and “feral animal” in the same comments = 2 points. To get all three points, though, you have to post it earlier in the day and spawn at least 20 responses.

    • while I agree with the fact that people who do this are in fact only the people raised like feral animals, it’s definitely not limited to hispanic dudes and dudettes (ew seriously, a dudette did this?! c’mon ladies!). I’ve seen every race do this. Doesn’t matter what color you are, if you were raised like a piece of shit, chances are high that you will grow up to be a piece of shit (I said CHANCES are. not that you have a 100% chance. just a 95% chance.)

  • I feel honored to have used the facilities there. I have a picture of a squirrel eating a nut outside the door if anyone is interested (took it the first time I visited the park)…

  • no need to a new job get those Park police to open and close them on their rounds. Get with it or give the park to DC so we can maintain it!

  • I just took a stroll past the “two job jonnies” a couple hours ago. They are not unlocked and are starting to give off a bit of a stench.

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